Trapped
by TSBP
Summary: Frenzy is trapped in more ways than one when he's captured by the Autobots, and forced to make decisions he would rather avoid. Will he go back to the way things were? Or has he been given the opportunity for something entirely new? Mature themes.
1. Chapter 1

Frenzy was angry. Well he was more than angry. He was a whole lot of emotions all bundled up together, seething in a cauldron of anxiety deep in his cosmetron. He couldn't identify most of the emotions he was feeling, and really didn't want to, so he just called it angry and stuck with that. Frenzy was itching to do what he most loved to do when he got angry, namely destroy stuff. He also loved to destroy stuff when he was happy, and when he was sad, and when he was excited. There wasn't a single emotion or event that Frenzy didn't try to turn into an excuse for destroying stuff.

He felt all his turning, twisting, jumbled up emotions being released, if only a little, as he connected his pile driver with the side of the building. The wood shattered satisfyingly, flinging harmless splinters of lighthouse all across Frenzy's chest. Inside he heard the fishermen and their families whimper in fear. He grinned and started hammering away at the stones forming the foundation.

He would be enjoying this so much more if he wasn't feeling so tired. Tired, and kinda sick. _Oh well_, he thought sarcastically, _I won't be feeling this way much longer._ What Frenzy wouldn't fess up to was the strange feeling that ending this strange feeling would feel stranger than continuing it. He felt frustration build up inside him again, and he hammered away even harder, relishing the terror he could hear from the people inside the building. They were powerless to stop him. He had, for this moment, complete control over their lives, and probably their deaths.

He knew he shouldn't be out here, alone, doing what he was doing. But he had to get out of Decepticon headquarters for a least a couple breems. The dark purple rooms and halls, with the weight of thousands of pounds of seawater pressing against every wall, had felt even more confining than usual. He had to enjoy his freedom and at least the semblance of normalcy, one more time before he let the lipole out of the cave. And he had to destroy something. Something big, and preferably valuable. So he'd snuck out of headquarters and attacked the first fleshling made thing he'd seen. This lighthouse. He knew he'd catch hell from Megatron for it later_. But what was the big fragger gonna do to him that he hasn't done already?_

He was almost through the wall and Frenzy could see the human's cowering inside, holding tight to each other. Frenzy chuckled and smashed into the room, toying with the idea of crushing the soft little insects under his pile-drivers.

One of the squishies, the tallest one there, brandished short metal stick thing. Trembling, the man shook it at the robot, his face red with a mix of rage and fear. "You touch my kids you metal freak, and I'll kill you!" He was standing firmer now, between Frenzy and his family. "Nobody touches my kids!" He shouted.

Something inside Frenzy snapped. With a roar the red and black Decepticon lifted one huge pile-driver, planning on crushing the protective father into a bloody pulp. "Yeah!" He sneered, "Well see who kills who, huh!" Suddenly Frenzy felt a large metal hand engulf his waist. He was lifted out of the lighthouse and off the ground. Struggling he turned to face his attacker. He stared into large blue optics which glared at him sternly. Choking down his fear, he let it be replaced with the more comfortable anger.

"I think that's quite enough." Optimus Prime said, his low voice both firm, and damn near condescending.

Frenzy was angry, and terrified. When an Autobot was farther away he made an easy target for Frenzy's earthquake powers. Even Optimus Prime had been toppled by the ground shaking pile driver attack more than once. And once a bot was down, then the real fun started. But this time Frenzy had been caught completely off guard, and there was little he could do in the huge Autobot's vise-like grip but panic, and lash out ineffectively.

_My fraggin' gun's in my leg._ Frenzy realized as he hammered away at Optimus' thick wrist, hoping to snag the edge of his driver against a delicate joint. "Leggo of me you big red retardicon." Frenzy shouted. Optimus only gripped him harder and shook him slightly, causing a wave of overwhelming nausea to wash over the small Decepticon.

"Looks like you're without backup." The damned Autobot mused in a self-satisfying way. "You should be more careful of where you choose to rain wanton destruction on." Frenzy only choked down a throatful of purge and slammed his weakening pile-drivers against the wrist. He was starting to feel faint, but he would be slagged if he didn't go down fighting. He heard a groan from Optimus as his pile driver connected with a sensitive junction, and he managed to wrestle his way out of the Prime's grip as it loosened.

Frenzy fell to the ground heavily, and staggered a few steps before attempting to ignite his thrusters, but the world was spinning around him too fast, and the diversion of energon from his vital systems to his legs made his whole chassis burn. _Slaggin' Idiot…_was all he was able to mutter at himself. _Shoulda known, wouldn't be able to handle this…_

A voice he couldn't identify close behind him sneered derisively, "Hey Prime! It looks like someone's had their wings clipped." The Decepticon cassette whirled around drunkenly swinging his pile driver's in the direction of the voice.

"Whoa," Tracks exclaimed, "Watch where you swing those things, you might have dented a fender."

Frenzy's engine was whining now, stuck between two gears and struggling from the missing energon that had been burned away in the Decepticon's failed escape attempt. Still he managed to mutter, "I'll dent more'an a fender you aft licker." Then he felt his legs begin to buckle under him, as his starved systems started pulling energy from the oil in his hydraulics. He fell to one knee, still punching at the air.

"Hmmm…you must have tired yourself out attacking defenseless fishermen." Tracks scoffed, taking a step closer. The Autobot car staggered a bit as Frenzy began striking out with his last strength at the ground around him, hoping in the haze before his processor shutdown that it would keep his opponent off balance. "Nighty night Deceptigoon." The pompous aft quipped. And then all Frenzy saw was blackness.

***

When he came back online the first thing his optic sensors registered in the dim light was a wall of orange metal above him. He didn't need to look to his right and left to see if the same orange metal made up the walls of his cell. He already fraggin knew that it did. _Great,_ he thought to himself, _just fraggin_ great. For a moment he tried to guess what Rumble or Soundwave would think, but he really had no idea. He felt the fear creeping back into his processor. He tried to get angry, hoping that would distract him from it all, but it only gave his databanks an overfried buzz. He heard a faint buzzing in his audials that was messing with the sensors in his recently refueled tanks, making him feel sick all over again. _The slaggers fed me? _He wondered, trying not to guess their reasons why. Finally he got up the strength to look around his prison. Frenzy was dismayed to see machines he faintly recognized next to him. Diagnostic machines. He sighed deeply, though the sulfurous tang in the air did little to clear his systems.

_Whatever happens_, he reassured himself, rather darkly, _It doesn't matter, I don't care, and I'm gonna be as sarcastic as possible about it._ He spent the next few breems thinking up sarcastic comments, which thankfully occupied nearly all of his processor space. Until he heard steps outside his cell, and was rather surprised when energy bars sparked to life in front of one orange wall, which then retracted, exposing the entire Cell like a pen in a zoo.

It was the big blue baboon of a leader and someone else, someone who's name didn't lend itself to being made fun of, so Frenzy had never bothered to remember it. But he did know that the boxy white Autobot was their medic. _Dammit._ Frenzy knew what was coming, and he drew on his massive storehouse of apathy to inoculate himself against it.

Prime watched the red and black Cassetticon carefully, years of studying the expressions of Autobots some of whose faces consisted of little more than an optic band and a mouth plate had trained him well. Though he couldn't be completely sure, he thought he saw the Decepticon withdraw from the situation, and the Autobot leader felt his spark go out to his enemy. He knew so little about this one, but youth was inscribed all over the smaller robot's face.

"You really shouldn't have come out of recharge yet." Optimus heard Ratchet remark. There was a snort from the figure lounging nonchalantly on the berth, back propped up against the wall.

"Yeah, well ya should have left note, I didn't know I was disobeying my jailers." He remarked lazily. "Why don't you shut that wall and let me get back to resting, before your big boss with the disco-ball get's mad."

"Frenzy, we need to talk to you." Optimus said softly, before Ratchet could cut in.

"Yeah, well that's too bad," Frenzy quipped souly, "Cause I'm not saying nothing." As if to prove his point he lay back down on the berth and turned so his back was facing them before adding "So you can kiss my shiny black skid plates."

"Frenzy, you're carrying." Ratchet said rather more sharply and loudly than Prime thought was necessary. The figure in the cell rolled over and sat up with short barking laugh.

"You figure that out all on your own Doc-bot? Or did you need to consult with my owner's manual? Because I gotta tell you, I don't go leaving _that_ in my glove compartment."

"How.." Optimus began.

"You don't know?" Frenzy asked, really feeling on a roll now that the sarcasm was flowing, "Ya see Oppy, when two bots wanna frag each other very much…"

"Enough," Optimus rumbled, firmly but with a hint of infuriating sympathy. "I meant how do you want us to…" he paused, wanting to word this exactly right. "What do you want us to do about it?"

Frenzy walked up to the bars of his cell, trying to walk as straight and strong as he wanted to feel, and put his hands on his sides.

"Let me go."

Optimus sighed, "I'm afraid I can't do that Frenzy."

Frenzy barked out another short, pained, laugh and walked back to the recharging berth. "Then I don't care what you do." He rolled over and faced that infuriating orange wall. "Cuz, Soundwave and the others will come for me." He finished.

Optimus was silent as the wall of the cell closed, then he turned to Ratchet. "Do you think that the Decepticons will come for him?" He asked.

Ratchet shrugged, "They've never attempted to rescue a prisoner before, I don't see why they would start now."

Optimus began heading down the hall, side by side with the medic. "I'm not so sure." He said slowly, his processor replaying moments in battle when he'd seen Soundwave pause before retreating to give his cassettes a chance to reach him again. "I believe that Soundwave has some attachment to them. Though I don't expect they would try a direct assault, we should still be cautious."

Ratchet grunted an assent. "That's not really the issue here Prime, is it."

Prime sighed deeply, "No I suppose not." He stopped in the hall and turned to his medic, "What do you think I should do?"

Ratchet just shook his head, "Prime, you're gonna have to talk to First Aid on that one. I really expected that Frenzy was just going to tell me to terminate. I could handle that, reluctantly of course, but I could do it. But I haven't overseen a carrying, even of a regular sized 'bot, mech or femme, since the war started. It's just not my area." Ratchet looked grim. "I'll tell you this though Prime, the kid's already taking carrying hard, I'm not sure that he'll be able to handle it."

Prime nodded, grimly, "How long does Frenzy have to decide? Before he would need…more serious maintenance."

Ratchet shook his head again, feeling the war resting heavier on his shoulders than he'd felt it in a long time, _Frag's sake_, he thought to himself, _he's just a kid…somebody should have been watching out for him. _"I don't know enough to give you an exact date; you really need to call in First Aid. All I know Prime is that he doesn't have long."

As the cell grew dim again, the curled up Frenzy was shocked to find that he had been crossing his hands over his chest protectively. He slammed his arms down on either side of the berth with a clang, more than a little ashamed, and not wanting to examine why. The issue at hand was a yawning pit in his processor, and he had to work hard to keep himself from slipping into it. He kept bouncing his mind away, looking for something, anything, to distract him. He didn't want to _talk_ about it. He didn't even want to think about it. He had avoided thinking about it ever since he'd figured things out. Well it was actually Rumble who had figured things out. Rumble had already been through this a couple'a times before. So he recognized it quick. Of course, before, Soundwave and Megs had Hook terminate... But this was Frenzy's first…

_SLAG!_ Frenzy thought, and punched the wall, hard enough to make his hand hurt. _Slaggit, don't think about it! There ain't nothing you can do, 'bout any of it. And you don't care anyway._ The Decepticon Mini-cassette curled in on himself even tighter and tried his hardest to slip back into recharge despite the turning in his fuel tanks. He clamped his mouth shut against the urge to purge and silently cursed the Autobots for filling his tank with premium unfiltered geothermic energon. He wasn't used to the potent, heady stuff. He couldn't process the high levels of energy while filtering out the impurities fast enough and it was making his circuits fritz. Eventually he rolled off the berth and purged his tanks dry right into the drain in the floor. When his exhausted heaving stopped he rolled over, wishing the room wasn't quite so large, and the floor wasn't quite so cold. He was numb, and tired, and he had a hard time recharging without the soft thrumming of Soundwave's spark echoing in the crowded subspace inside Soundwave's chest.

_It's so cold… on the floor_…Frenzy thought in a weakened haze, but he couldn't find the energy to make it back to the berth. He was starting to wish that he'd managed to keep at least some of the energon down, as his overtaxed circuits started to ache from lack of it. Frenzy was disoriented enough by the time he slipped into a fitful recharge under the berth that he didn't notice his hands curled protectively over his chest, right where he could feel the tiny spark pulsing faintly against his own.

Frenzy awoke to warm, metal hands jostling him, and he had to fight the urge to scream. He was too weak with hunger to do more to express his distaste at being manhandled back onto the berth than by flashing an appallingly rude gesture he'd learned from humans. His optics weren't even registering color anymore, and the blinding flash of the cell's lights being turned up stunned the circuits into uselessness.

"Take it easy. Take it easy." A soothing, chipper voice that Frenzy took an instant disliking to, crooned, as the Cassetticon was vaguely aware of diagnostics being taken. "You're only a few volts short of stasis lock, so take it easy." Frenzy felt a rush of panic when he felt those same warm metal hands gently pry his chassis open, and he shifted nervously. "Try to relax," the voice reassured, "This may not be pleasant, but I have to bypass the stasis lock failsafe." Frenzy was too disoriented and exhausted to do more than register the dull jabbing pain of electrodes being clamped on either end of his outer spark casing. He felt a sudden flood of energy through his circuits and his optic sensors finally rebooted, allowing him to see the other robot clearly.

He didn't recognize him, but Frenzy did recognize the big red Autobot logo on his chest. The 'Bot continued to take readings, and run scanners over the Decepticon. Frenzy felt the electrical energy pulse through his systems. His arms and legs tingled dully with it, not registering sensation correctly. It was only a jump start, something to keep his systems online, and he was still exhausted. Finally the Autobot looked him in the visor.

"Coming around a little I see." He said, "That's good. Your tanks were completely empty. You're lucky you didn't slip into stasis lock before I got here." He reached into a large container set up by the berth that hadn't been in the room when Frenzy passed out. "I'm going to put you on an energon line of a formula diluted with inert carborundum. That should ease your circuits back into functioning without overloading them. I don't want to give your tanks anything to process until they're being a little less sluggish." Frenzy just stared at the wall blankly, away from the working Autobot and away from his opened chest. Now that he was processing better he cared less and less about whatever it was the stupid faceless Autobot was doing.

After setting up the fuel line the Autobot reached back into his container, and came out with what looked like a modified medi-scanner. He tried to catch the Decepticon's eye, but Frenzy wouldn't look at him. "My name is First Aid." His voice was both friendly and gentle in a way that was driving Frenzy up the wall. "And you're Frenzy. I don't think we've met before, but I've heard a lot about you." There was the barest hint of irony in First Aid's voice, and Frenzy finally turned his head to try and confirm it. The Autobot's face, which was nothing more than a mouthplate and an optic band, was inscrutable. First Aid continued, "Now, if it's alright with you Frenzy, I would like to do a scan of your spark casing. See how things are in there."

Frenzy snorted, "sshwhy ya'wan' do 't'at?" he muttered, still feeling groggy.

First Aid was already taking the scans, apparently not really caring if it was alright with Frenzy. "Just want to get some readings." He explained. "The more information we have, the better we can treat you, and the sooner you'll start to feel better." Frenzy grunted as First Aid opened his outer spark casing, giving him a better look at the laser core and what was inside. The Autobot fell silent as he continued his scans, which went on for so long that Frenzy almost slipped back into recharge.

"Well," First Aid began as he gently closed Frenzy back up, "You have a strong, closely knit, sparkling growing in there. Three weeks old, at least, with a protoform superstructure already forming. No wonder you've been feeling sick, your cosmetron must be producing nanites like crazy to build it, and it's still very closely attached to the inside of your spark chamber."

Most of what First Aid had said Frenzy was in no state to absorb, and he really couldn't decide if he wanted any of this information anyway, so he stayed silent. The Autobot doctor busied himself with the contents of his container, allowing the Cassetticon a moment to think, or to avoid thinking, before beginning again. "As the protoform develops, a laser core and spark chamber will form around the new spark, and it will begin to be fed with umbilical lines. This will make it much more…complicated, to terminate." Frenzy couldn't look at the Autobot doctor, and he didn't answer, already pretending in his own way that no one was there. Frist Aid seemed to realize this, but continued, "If you want to terminate, Frenzy, you must decide in the next few days."

"It dosen' matter," Frenzy spat out sluggishly, "Soundwave an' the others will come for me."

First Aid waited a moment, before continuing on as before, "If you wish to continue, then adjustments will need to be made. Because of your size carrying won't be easy for you, and I make no guarantees about the outcome. I've never delivered from anyone smaller than a compact car. Microsized 'Bot's can lose their sparklings if they develop too small and fragile. But I still think there is a good chance of a positive outcome, if we work together." Frenzy was silent. His hand on his chest.

"I'll give you some time to think it over." The Autobot Medic said softly, before leaving the room with his container.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thanks to everyone who is watching this story. It's always nice to see interest in something you're writing. I just wanted to reiterate that while this story will have no 'explicit' content in the story itself, no romance, no slash, no gory/steamy details, it will still touch on some 'adult' themes, so be prepared for some touchy subjects. And, as always, I welcome feedback of any kind.

***

"So?" Ratchet asked as First Aid entered the med-bay carrying his box of special equipment. The older medic was nursing a cube of energon; one from his special stash. Ultra high grade, but it looked the same as the regular stuff. He kept a good supply on hand, and well hidden, for those times he needed to relax, and sometimes to forget.

First Aid dropped the container near where Ratchet was relaxing and sat down on it. He waved away the offered high-grade, knowing full well what it was, and rested his arms on his knees, his chin on his hands. Ratchet waited.

"So?" He asked again, a little more forcefully.

"So what?" First Aid answered benignly, still lost in thought.

Ratchet snorted into the bottom of his cube as he took a long drink. "So what did the kid say? What's going on?"

"Hmm? Oh, he didn't say much. He was almost stasis locked when I reached him. You really shouldn't have given him such strong energon. He couldn't handle it. If he'd stasis locked before I'd gotten there he would have lost the sparkling. And we could have lost them both." The matter-of-fact, helpful tone the younger medic used to point out the mistake annoyed Ratchet, but he let his colleague continue. "He's carrying a small sparkling, about three weeks old. But it's a strong one, already taxing Frenzy's systems, I've got him on an energon line now but his tanks should be coming around soon. With good and constant care he I think he should be able to carry it to term, but it's really too early to tell. To say the least, it would be a slightly longer than average gestation."

"Are those his plans?" Ratchet asked, "What are you going to do?"

First Aid tapped his faceplates thoughtfully, "I didn't ask for an answer outright yet. I presented him with the facts, and then I gave him some time to think. Though I've left…both options…up to him, I think we may need to prod him a bit to get him to come to a decision. He seems rather in denial about his situation."

"That your expert medical opinion, First Aid?" Ratchet gibed. "Any 'Bot with half a motherboard coulda told you that." He took another swig and swirled the energon at the very bottom of the cube. "You know what those Earth humans say about denial don't you?"

First Aid cocked his head to one side "It's a coping mechanism used to deal with unpleasant situations beyond our control?"

Ratchet paused, before tossing back the last of his cube. "I was gonna say that it's not just a river in Egypt, but whatever." He murmured standing.

"What's Egypt?" First Aid asked as Ratchet turned back to his workstation. The older medic just waved him off.

"Forget it, First Aid. You better go tell Optimus everything. Primus knows the big softy will want to know it all and then some so he can brood about it for a while."

***

Frenzy knew he was feeling better when he started feeling angry. He smiled to himself as the feeling grew, whipping itself up into the storm of rage that he was used to carrying around with him most of the time. _That's better_, he thought as he started scanning the cell for something to destroy. If the Autoboobs were gonna put him in a little orange box you can bet that he was gonna make the box regret it. He sat up and pointedly ignored the way it made his equilibrium circuits do a barrel roll. There was a panel on the far wall that was begging for a piledriver to put some nice shiny dents in it. He rubbed his hands together almost gleefully, his entire situation forgotten for a moment in the glow of being able to pound into Autobot Headquarters without any fear of retaliation. He made a move to detach the energon line from his chest, and froze.

He looked to the container it was connected to and saw that it was only half empty. He drummed his fingers against the line thoughtfully, all the while trying to avoid thinking about the fluttering, pulsing, little spark pressed against his own. _Rip the slaggin line out and go pound something already!_ His mind practically screamed. Frenzy lay back down on the berth. His processor started working overtime batting unwanted thoughts away as they came flying in from all directions.

That stupid fraggin Autobot's voice kept replaying in his memory banks like a dysfunctional datatape. _If you want to terminate…if you wish to continue…time to think it over...decide in the next few days._ _Want_ and _wish_ were the two words taunting him the most, so they were the ones that he made the most effort ignoring. It never mattered what he wanted, and it made no difference what he wished, so he'd normally steered clear of thinking about it, until now.

_I __**want**__ to stop thinking about it, and I __**wish **__there was something in this stupid orange room to destroy other than slaggin orange walls and a slaggin orange berth!_ He thought furiously, and then smiled as he felt the rage build up in him again. But for the moment he contented himself with imagining pounding into the little orange box, maybe even finding the cell's bar generators and knocking them out. He wouldn't be able to escape, of course, but it would keep the slaggin wall closed until they got it fixed. And it would probably get their gears in a grind too. Frenzy grinned, and visualized, tapping against the energon line absently; focusing only on his fantasy of destruction and not at all about those annoying topics like want versus wish.

***

Ratchet had been right in his assessment. Optimus had wanted to know all the specifics and then some. The Autobot leader had been sitting in his office, seemingly brooding before First Aid even arrived. He had listened calmly while First Aid told him the bare medical facts, and proceeded to drill him on what he'd gathered about Frenzy's mental state, which First Aid was the first to admit wasn't much. The medic could sense Prime's unease as the conversation was steered to more troublesome topics.

"Did he mention any of the Decepticons to you?"

"He only said that Soundwave and the others would come for him. Like I said, he was rather disoriented when I talked to him. Though he did make some very rude hand gestures…" First Aid answered, "I suppose I'll be able to get more information when I go back in a few hours to hook up another energon line. That is, if he's feeling cooperative. I really don't know how he'll react when he starts to come around."

"How old do you think he is, really?" Optimus asked quietly, "Blaster's cassettes aren't very old."

"It's impossible to tell. I suppose we'll have to ask him. Don't let his size fool you though, that's all the bigger he's going to get." Optimus gave First Aid a hard look that made him shift uncomfortably, which wasn't like the placid medic at all.

"First Aid, did you detect any…abuse?" Prime's voice was low, but firm.

The question shocked the doctor, though in hindsight he should have seen it coming. He had been so wrapped up in the bare, measurable facts that he'd collected, that the how and why had been overlooked. He shook his head. "I didn't find anything, but…" he paused, intensely unsettled by this new train of thought, "but such things are hard to identify."

The Autobot leader nodded gravely. "First Aid, thank you for coming in on such short notice. Do whatever you think is best concerning this. I haven't informed anyone other than Prowl and Ironhide, if you want anyone else's assistance go ahead. But if you can, find out what really happened. And most important, find out what he really wants." The young faceless doctor nodded, then turned to go, leaving Prime alone in his office.

Optimus rubbed his optic sensors blearily, as if trying to dispel the dark thoughts filling his mind. _Young or not, abused or not,_ Prime thought to himself, _we are not letting him go back until we know what we are sending him back to and whether he has the freedom to choose what he wants there._


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: The next few updates should be longer, but I wanted to get this up before the weekend. Comments are always appreciated! Thanks for reading folks.

***

As chief of security Ironhide had, of course, been informed of all the facts concerning Frenzy's capture and…condition. And it was a good thing he knew everything too, because if Frenzy weren't in such a…delicate…state Ironhide would have probably bashed the little punk's head in by now. The old red mech clenched his fists in frustration as he listened to the mini-cassette pounding away at the walls of his cell and he couldn't help but wonder if this wasn't the reason he'd been given all of the facts. Ironhide opened a radio channel to the med-bay.

"Ratchet, First Aid, one a ya guys better get down here 'fore the kid punches a hole in his cell."

There was an irritated sigh on the other line, "Look Ironhide, I'm in the middle of something right now and Firsty's off doing science or whatever with Wheeljack and Perceptor. Can you just…quiet him down for a sec until Aid can get there?"

Ironhide practically growled, "What the slag ya expect me ta do? Tie 'is drivers bahind his back?"

"Heh. No." Ratchet laughed dryly through the comm, "Just, I don't know, distract him somehow. Aid'll be down in an astrosecond." A solid click let Ironhide know that he'd been hung up on. He muttered to himself as he walked down the brig's hall, closer and closer to the loud clanging.

"Distract 'im eh? How the slaggin' scrap am I s'posed ta do that without hitting 'im?" The security officer pushed the buttons to turn on the bars, before keying in the combination to retract the wall. It was almost completely up before Ironhide realized that the bars had failed to come online.

"The Pit?" was all the old mech was able to get out before the prisoner inside the cell made a run for it. Fortunately, Frenzy wasn't quite as fast out of the gate as he thought he would be, and Ironhide was much quicker than his reputation gave him credit for. The larger mech made a diving leap as the Cassetticon sprinted down the hall. He managed to grab a foot as he fell, tripping up the escaping Decepticon.

"Lemme go!" Frenzy cried as he hammered away at the huge black hand curled around his lower leg. "Lemme go you big dumb aft-kissing, lube-sucking, rust bucket!" Ironhide gritted his dental plates against the blows and pulled the struggling 'Con into a tight bear hug, pinning the pile drivers against Frenzy's sides. The Decepticon continued to struggle as Ironhide stood up, lifting the smaller mech off the ground wiggling against the broad red arms pinning his arms and crossing over his chest.

"Ya little punk!" Ironhide exclaimed both angry and somewhat amused, "Shorting out yer bars. I oughtta thrash you for that." Then he groaned as a dense metal foot kicked hard against his knee joint, and quickly had to shoot down the urge to make good on his threat. He waited as patiently as he could for several minutes while Frenzy wiggled and kicked against him spouting some of the most obscene things from Cybertron and Earth that Ironhide had heard outside of New York City traffic. Finally the Microsized 'Con wore himself out and hung limp in the larger mech's clutches, pounding his head over and over against his enemy's square, red arm.

Ironhide sighed and adjusted his grip, getting ready to carry the Decepticon to the next cell over. But something made him pause. The little mech's chest. It was so warm. And now that the side of his arm was flat against it he could faintly feel through the plating the double pulse of two sparks. Ironhide looked down at the Cassetticon still banging his head and he felt his anger evaporate, though not all his frustration. _Yeah, I make a great babysitter_, he thought to himself sarcastically as opened the next cell, _Primus, I can't deal with this._

Ironhide made sure to shut the wall before he lay Frenzy down on the berth, gently. As soon as the large red mech released his grip the younger 'Con shrank away from him, and then pointedly ignored him, looking right above and beyond the Autobot's battle scarred helm like it wasn't even there. Ironhide moved to the other side of the cell and dimmed the lights, then leaned his back against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. He stayed while Frenzy slipped into recharge, unable to decide whether he was watching a prisoner or watching over him.

It was a good twenty earth minutes later when he heard a faint tapping on the wall. Ironhide pushed the cell's comm button, "Who is it?" he asked quietly, giving the resting 'Con a sideways glance.

"It's First Aid. What happened?" The Autobot doctor asked loudly through the comm. Ironhide winced at the voice.

"Not so loud." He hissed back. "The kid's resting."

"What happened?" First Aid asked again, at the level of a whisper.

"The little slagger offlined his old cell's bars an' tried to make a break for it. I think he tired himself out."

"You didn't hurt him did you?"

Ironhide felt a stab of panic, remembering the way he'd felt the warm sparks pulsing through Frenzy's chest. "Frag…I…I don't think so." Ironhide entered his security key and the wall opened just enough to let the Autobot doctor into the cell. The Security Officer shifted a little nervously as First Aid took a scan of the Decepticon on the berth.

"He's fine, they're fine." First Aid said softly, "He's just gone and burned off a lot of his reserves again. I'll set up another energon line." Ironhide did his best to hide his relief while First Aid set up the line.

"Yeah, and disable those drivers while yer at it." Ironhide muttered under his breath as he turned to go. "I don't want the little aft-head tearing up another one of my cells." First Aid nodded thoughtfully as the old red mech closed the cell up again.

"I know you're online." First Aid said gently to the figure on the berth who didn't move a servo.

"I know you're online," he repeated. "My scanner told me so."

Frenzy snorted as his optic band flickered back to life. "Some super doctor you are, sounds like your motherboard fraggin scanner is doing all the work," he snapped.

"How are you feeling?"

"Like I'm brand spanking new and electrum plated. What the hell do you care?"

First Aid pretended to do important calculations on his scanner, more for Frenzy's benefit than his own. "If you hadn't burned off so much of the energon I'd given you earlier in your little escape attempt I would have been able to give you something for your tanks by now." He gently chided. "Using up that much energy. It isn't good for the sparkling or you."

Frenzy snorted. "So I'm being sent to recharge without rations for being a bad little protoform?"

First Aid decided to change the subject as he took another scan of the Decepticon's systems, looking for things that hadn't occurred to him the first time he'd examined the Cassetticon. "So, have you given it any thought yet, Frenzy? On what you want…" he was cut off.

"I've told you, it doesn't matter. They're gonna come for me." Frenzy snapped again.

"Uhhuh." The medic adjusted the settings of his scans, searching for anything else he might have missed.

"They are! I'm an important part of the Decepticon Army. I've taken down more of you big afterburner lickers than Screamer." The red and black 'Con sat up in the berth crossing arms over his legs, which made the scans more difficult.

First Aid ignored this, and took some mental notes on his scanner's findings. "From what I've heard about Starscream that wouldn't be difficult," he remarked. "And when the others come for you, what will _they_ do about the sparkling?"

Frenzy gave a short barking laugh, "Whadda you care?"

_Quite a lot actually._ First Aid thought, but he kept this to himself. "Just curious," he answered, "I've never seen any Decepticon sparklings."

"Well I've never seen any Autobot sparklings, you guys kill em all?" Frenzy blurted out angrily before falling uncomfortably silent.

"No," First Aid answered evenly, "Most of the Autobots that you know are far from their loved ones, and fighting a war. On Cybertron and in the refugee colonies I delivered hundreds of sparklings."

Frenzy didn't have anything to say to this. He just lay back down on the berth and assumed his normal position facing the wall, the energon line draped over his arm.

"You're going to have to come to a decision in the next few days, Frenzy." First Aid said softly.

"It doesn't matter," the Cassetticon muttered still staring at the wall, "Soundwave and the others will come for me."

"What if they don't?" First Aid asked gently.

"They will." Frenzy muttered.

"What if they don't?"

"I said they WILL!" Frenzy suddenly sat up and shouted. "SOUNDWAVE'S GONNA COME FOR ME!" he yelled, "SO SHUT YOUR STUPID SLAGGIN MOUTH!"

First Aid didn't point out his lack of mouth as he watched Frenzy slam back on the berth and roll over as furiously as he could without disturbing the energon line. He waited to make sure Frenzy didn't do anything else rash, and then left the Microsized Decepticon alone in the cell.


	4. Chapter 4

Two days, one cell, and countless scans later First Aid was still no closer to teasing out Frenzy's wishes concerning the sparkling. In fact, Frenzy had only become more belligerent and uncooperative, especially after he destroyed his second cell and his pile drivers had been disabled. He insulted any who tried to speak to him, and withdrew completely whenever they came too close. He spent most of his time recharging or pretending to, even though he'd been offered television if he would only answer some of First Aid's questions.

He'd answered them quite succinctly, with an upraised middle finger.

First Aid tapped at his faceplates thoughtfully, going over the results of his scans for what seemed like the thousandth time. It was empty and quiet in the med-bay now. Ratchet was relaxing with friends and most of the part-time medical personnel were either doing the same or out on patrol. First Aid had shown his scans to Ratchet, Perceptor, Wheeljack, even Hoist, though he hadn't told anyone else of his patient's condition. They'd all agreed that while there was some evidence pointing to possible past abuse, there was nothing conclusive. Nothing that couldn't be explained away, or confirmed, if only he could get Frenzy to talk.

Two days, and no movement from Decepticons, anywhere. Not near their headquarters, not near the Combaticon base, not near the Insecticon base. Nothing on any of the patrols. Even spies on Cybertron were reporting an unusual quiet on the mostly Decepticon controlled planet. This sort of thing had happened before, and it usually meant the Decepticons were scheming, or between schemes. Prowl called it the calm before the storm and it usually made Red Alert twitchy, but for 'Bot's not on patrol they usually just called it 'down time'. Time to rest, recuperate, rebuild, and explore their individual interests.

_Curious though,_ First Aid pondered, _that they haven't even sent spies to try and locate Frenzy. Have they abandoned him? Or are they just biding their time?_ Of course, First Aid hadn't been able to determine if the other Decepticons were aware of Frenzy's condition. And he couldn't even begin to guess if such knowledge would affect whether they attempted a rescue or not. The only thing that he was sure of as he went over his most recent scans was that they had essentially run out of time. Frenzy needed more invasive maintenance than scans and energon lines, whether he was keeping the sparkling or not. But First Aid had to know which choice it would be before he could continue.

_Most important, find out what he wants, _Prime had said. But this was proving the most difficult task. First Aid could sense that Frenzy probably didn't really know what he wanted, or didn't want to admit it even to himself. He'd wanted to give his patient the most time possible to consider his options. But the Minicassette hadn't been interested in hearing the full ramifications of either choice when First Aid provided it. First Aid suspected that where Frenzy had come from the choice would have been made for him, and he was almost certain what the result would have been, but without Frenzy's word he couldn't prove it. He knew from the simple evidence that Frenzy had not done anything to jeopardize the sparkling himself that on some level he was attached to it. But First Aid didn't know if the attachment was strong enough to outweigh the struggle it would be for the Minicassette to carry the sparkling to term.

First Aid sighed, feeling for the first time in a long time genuinely frustrated. He needed answers now, but he didn't know how to force the issue without simply causing Frenzy to retreat further. It wasn't in his nature to be confrontational.

A sudden stroke of inspiration hit the doctor. _But I know who is…_he thought.

***

Frenzy was shocked out of recharge by the feel of cold hands on his chest plates and a sudden blinding light. He choked down a scream, then choked down some purge, and moved to bat the hands away. But his arms were feeling too sluggish. In fact, his whole body felt sluggish…well more sluggish than was usual now. His optic band came online, and he looked up at Ratchet peering down into his opened chest, his hand replaced with some unrecognizable tool.

"What the frag ya think you're doin'?" he half moaned half muttered, still groggy. His vocalizer felt like it was full of steel wool and glue. The Autobot medic didn't look at him, and didn't answer. Frenzy glanced around the room, but First Aid was nowhere to be found.

Frenzy couldn't really see what the Autobot was doing in his chassis and it was making him nervous. There was a strange tugging sensation, and he felt his spark chamber open sending cold shivers of panic running through his body. The tiny spark that he could feel at all times now, despite the protoform shell he knew was developing near it and the laser core around it, fluttered rapidly close to his own, so naked and exposed.

"Wha….what are you doin'?" He asked trembling.

The tool in Ratchet's wrist retracted, to be replaced by a glowing laser scalpel. The Autobot didn't make eye contact as he moved the scalpel down into Frenzy's chest.

"I'm terminating your sparkling." Ratchet said coldly.

Frenzy froze as a small but loud part of himself shouted '_finally'. _In a few seconds, it would all be over, finished. Like it none of it had ever happened. Like it had never existed. Like it had never lived.

Frenzy's processor ground to a halt as he felt the warmth of the scalpel on his spark casing. Just a few seconds, and it's finished.

_But…_

"No!" he shouted, pulling away, pushing violently against Ratchet's arms. The moment of uncertainty was all that had been needed for something long ignored to rise up. And suddenly Frenzy wanted to destroy things. Starting with the doctor in front of him. He switched to kicking out at the Autobot with his legs as he scrambled backwards on the berth trying to hastily close his chest plates.

"Get the Pit away from me you pipe-sucking cable-tugger!" He shouted pressed against the wall.

Ratchet lowered his hands, and backed away. "Okay Frenzy," he said gently, "Anything you want."

Some part of Frenzy was disgusted by the relief that washed over him as he felt his sparkling's pulse in his chest. He did his best to make sure everything was closed gently, but he was unsure if all his casings were in the right place. He glared at the medic whose optics were shining with sympathy.

"I guess we know what you really want now, huh?" Ratchet said slowly, faintly smiling.

Frenzy crouched in a tight ball in the corner of the berth, full of rage and other emotions he didn't want to identify.

"Fuck you." He muttered. Then Frenzy lay back down on his side, still curled tightly, trying to choke back purge and the urge to cry. Defeated.

Ratchet felt an instant pang of remorse. _Primus, I didn't mean to scare the kid this bad_, he thought. He took a step toward the berth. "Hey, kid, it's okay, I'm…we're…we're gonna help." The medic half expected Frenzy to snap back about not wanting or needing help…but the Decepticon had withdrawn completely, staring into space blankly with his arms crossed over his chest.

_Slag, I'm no good at this…I'm a medic not a guidance counselor._ Ratchet stood motionless for a few minutes, conflicted. He couldn't just leave the kid to stew like this, but he didn't have the slightest clue what to say. "I'll go get First Aid, he'll come in and talk to you…about what we need to do…" he finally offered lamely. Frenzy made no sign he'd even heard what the medic had said. "We're gonna help you Frenzy." Ratchet finished, "I promise."

Frenzy curled in on himself even tighter as the cell closed back up again. Pit, he was tired. Too tired to derail unpleasant trains of thought anymore. For the first time in weeks, or longer, he let his thoughts go where they would without resistance. His processor rushed straight to the sparkling and stayed there, examining it for the first time completely. Somehow this didn't surprise him, what surprised him was how it made him feel. It felt so safe.

Rumble's words echoed in Frenzy's memory chips 'They ain't gonna let ya keep it. Ain't nobody gonna want it but you, and even then once it's gone you won't be wanting it anymore. Trust me Bro.'

The Minicassette shuddered, his chest burning a little bit now that he was allowing himself to notice. It was Rumble who had figured it out. The intense pain when transforming, the inability to mass shift, the lethargy and purging… he said he'd seen it all before, felt it all before, which Frenzy had never known.

"Oh yeah, boy you really got it bad." Rumble muttered peering into Frenzy's opened chest. "Frag, how long you say you been feelin like this?"

Frenzy moaned as another wave of nausea washed over him. Rumble had found him purging out his ration of energon in the back of one of the storage bays. He'd been hiding from Soundwave, since transforming lately had gone from extremely uncomfortable to next to impossible.

"I dunno…a while…"the red and black cassette murmured to his brother.

Rumble tapped at his sitting brother's spark casing, which sent Frenzy into a spasm of dry heaves and earned the purple Decepticon a punch in the jaw.

"Heh," Rumble laughed the weak blow off as he stood up, rubbing at his face plates, "When was the last time you had some good old fashioned interface time? Who took you for a barrel-roll in the berth last?"

Frenzy slammed his chest plates shut. "Ain't none of your fraggin business…strut-licker."

Rumble shrugged innocently, "Hey, I just wanted ta know who fragged my little bro up. 'Case I could go give em a gentle talking to, pile driver style."

The black and red cassette just crossed his arms over his knees and looked at the floor.

"Him, eh?" Rumble realized bitterly. "Well there goes that then."

The two brothers were silent in the dark storage bay for a while. Then Rumble sighed and offered his brother a hand, pulling the weaker Cassette to his feet. "Well, we better get you ta Hook and get this all sorted out then."

"Get what sorted out?"

Rumble snorted and tried dragging his brother closer to the door, but Frenzy knew there was something up that he didn't understand yet. And he knew better than to be dragged anywhere without understanding exactly what was going to happen once he got there. At least now he did. He dug his feet in, forcing Rumble to stop.

"I'm not going nowhere, until you tell me what's really going on. For real." He said sharply.

The purple Decepticon shuffled his feet uncomfortably, scratching at the back of his neck. "You're not gonna like it bro…"

"Like you give an empty's afterburner." Frenzy shot back, trying to hide his nervousness. "Tell me."

"But Bro…"

"Just fraggin tell me."

Rumble sighed angrily, "Dammit Frenzy… Ya got yourself sparked up."

The other Cassetticon gave him a confused look.

"Carrying. Uploading a protoform. Scraplet in sparkling. Primus slag it all to Pit, Frenzy you're pregnant."

Frenzy sat down on the floor with a clang; staring down at his chest as if any astrosecond a sparkling might come tearing out. Rumble just watched him and fumed. Finally the younger Decepticon looked up at his brother.

"Is it gonna be okay?" He asked fearfully.

Rumble turned away, "Is what gonna be okay?" he spat out gruffly.

"The…the…"

The purple Decepticon whirled around, "What the FRAG are you thinking?" he practically screamed. "They ain't gonna let you keep it! Ain't nobody gets to keep em! Not you! Not me! Slag, not even TC!"

"But…"

"But nothin'! He don't care! He don't care who the other creator is, if it's yours it's gonna be a useless little sawed off scrap that won't never do no good for nobody! We've already got more runts than we can handle!" Rumble turned away from his stunned little brother, practically shaking with rage.

It took him a long time to compose himself, but finally he turned around and sat down next to Frenzy "Look bro," he started slowly, as if he were talking to a hard-drive damaged drone. "I know how you feel, I really do, I been through it before. Twice. And ya always feel like…I don't know…like ya do right now. But believe me, it's a lot better this way. I mean, what the frag are you gonna do with a sparkling? And thinka how bad you feel now. I promise you, going through it would be like, ten million times worse. And ain't nobody gonna want it but you, and even then, once it's gone, you won't be wanting it anymore. Trust me, once it's done and dusted you'll realize you never wanted it in'na first place. You'll feel so much better if we just get this over with ASAP, okay bro?"

Frenzy nodded his head mutely, "You been through it before?" he asked, softly.

Rumble patted him on the back, "Yup. Twice. It's as easy as oil-cake, and nobody but you, me, Hook, and Soundie ever have to know. Okay?"

Frenzy waved the purple hand off his back, "Okay," he said, "just, give me a little bit, okay?"

"It'll really be easier if you do it soon…I mean…slag I never couldn't transform before… when was the last time you and—"

"Three weeks." Frenzy said, blankly, "The last time was three weeks ago."

Rumble whistled, "They you really gotta do it now…Frag."

The red and black Cassetticon shook his head, "I'll go to Hook just as soon as I don't feel like I'm gonna purge all over the place. I promise."

Rumble stood, and shifted his weight from one foot to another uncomfortably, "Ya want me to go with ya?" he asked.

"No, I'll go myself…" Frenzy had answered.

But a few hours later, after a quick refuel, he'd been flying over glimmering ocean waves looking for something to take his frustration out on. And that's when he'd spotted the lighthouse.

_I shoulda just let Hook do it._ Frenzy thought to himself as he put one hand over where his chest was warmest. _At least then a Decepticon woulda been doing it. Not a fleshy-loving Autobot._ The burning sensation was getting stronger, and it was starting to worry Frenzy. But the gentle rhythmic pulse of his sparkling was as steady as ever. _Don't worry,_ he thought to it absently, _I'm not gonna let any Autobots terminate you, you deserve better 'an that at least._ The decision filled the Cassetticon with a warm safe feeling. _I shoulda just let Hook do it._

Frenzy heard shuffling outside the cell wall, and he did his best to pretend like he didn't hear it while the wall opened a crack and First Aid entered carrying that stupid container of his. The Minicassette lay flat on the berth staring at the bright orange ceiling spitefully.

"Hello Frenzy." The medic said kindly, "Are you feeling alright?"

Any number of wonderfully vile and sarcastic comebacks instantly came to Frenzy's mind, but… "My chest kinda burns…" he said.

"Hmmm…." First Aid ran a scanner over the Decepticon's chest. "Can you open up your chest plates for me?" He asked. He seemed genuinely surprised when Frenzy instantly obliged.

The red Microsized robot shifted uncomfortably as First Aid began poking around near his spark casing.

"So, Ratchet tells me that you wouldn't let him terminate the sparkling." First Aid commented as he opened up the laser core.

A yelp turned into a laugh. "Stupid fragger." Frenzy muttered. "Didn't think you guys'd try that one."

"You really didn't leave us with much choice." The medic commented benignly as he examined the spark and sparkling.

"Yeah, well, neither did you rustbolts. I'm not gonna let any Autobots terminate my sparkling."

First Aid wondered about asking if he would consider letting a Decepticon, but he didn't want to press his luck. Frenzy didn't want the Autobots to terminate. That was what was important. Gently he closed Frenzy up.

"Well, the burning feeling is your sparkling getting ready to detach from the inside of your spark chamber. Normally this would happen on its own, but I think that your sparkling may need some assistance finding its way down and out to the protoform pod shell beneath your laser core." Giving his patient a scrutinizing look over, he added, "If you are sure about continuing, I'm going to need to do a complete chest overhaul to give the sparkling room to grow. I can't put it off any more without jeopardizing both of you."

Frenzy gave a sarcastic laugh, "Is that my only option?"

"Other than terminating, yes."

The Decepticon gave the medic a dismissive wave, "Then do what you gotta do doc. I really don't care."

First Aid shook his head bemusedly as he pulled tools from his container and set them on top. "Okay then," he said. "I'm going to take you temporarily offline, then move you to the med bay for this. Ratchet will probably assist me when we get there."

Frenzy shrugged. "Whatever." he muttered as he felt warm metal hands entering the commands to take him offline. _Soundwave and the other's will come for me…_he thought as he slipped off, _an' then they'll do things the right way…_


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Thanks to everyone for the watches and reviews. I always appreciate feedback, of any kind. Think I'm doing something right? Think I'm doing something wrong? Wanna guess at how it's gonna end before I put it up? Wanna flame the heck outta me for not writing any pron in? I love it all.

Ironhide was making a leisurely security round, more for something to do rather than any real need, when he spotted Perceptor peering from the observatory down into the medbay. Now Ironhide didn't really so much dislike Perceptor as he couldn't stand being around him. The brainy slagger just didn't know how to keep a lid on it, and usually said in ten words what could have been said in one. But the security officer had been informed of First Aid moving Frenzy to the med bay for something, and curiosity got the better of him. He walked up next to the scientist and looked down at the two Autobot ambulances crowding over their much smaller patient.

"What's going on?" He mumbled, preparing himself to have to ignore at least half of the answer.

"I'm simply observing and gathering quantitative data on the procedure Frenzy is undergoing. Duration, size, energy expenditures. There isn't nearly enough information on the reproductive capabilities of Microsized Decepticons. This is truly a fascinating opportunity." Perceptor entered a something into a datapad, never taking his optics off the scene in the med-bay.

"Surgery eh?" Ironhide rumbled darkly, "So the kid finally told em to terminate."

"Oh no! That's not it at all!" Perceptor exclaimed, "This is what makes this situation so unique. The procedure will allow the carrying to continue."

Ironhide stiffened, "Continue?"

"Yes! As you can see First Aid is rearranging the configuration of Frenzy's main fuel lines to move his cosmotron dorsally. He'll then completely replace the Minicassettes fuel tanks and remove extraneous components dealing with weapons systems, flight capabilities, mass shift generators…all to make room for the protoform capsule."

Ironhide hadn't heard a word the scientist had said, "The kid told them to do it? The kid told em to continue?"

Perceptor nodded vigorously not hearing a word the security officer had said. "The most exciting part is imminent, when Ratchet will detach the sparkling from the inside of the spark casing and guide it down out of the laser core and into the capsule. It's a very delicate operation. One I've never seen done in person before."

Ironhide tapped on the glass, trying to catch a better glimpse of what was going on. "Is he gonna be okay?" He asked, almost to himself.

"Hmmm…Oh First Aid and I have gone over the figures with the entire medical staff several times. If Frenzy will consent to a strict schedule of rest and refueling and doesn't strain his systems unduly we are predicting an eighty seven percent chance of a positive outcome. Oh look, they're preparing the spark stabilizer, they will begin detaching the sparkling as soon as…"

"Bed rest huh?" Ironhide murmured thoughtfully as he watched. "I don't imagine the kid'll like that too much." Perceptor was too absorbed by the surgery to answer him, even if Ironhide hadn't wandered off in the direction of the storage bay.

***

When Ratchet wheeled the still off-lined Frenzy back into his cell he was somewhat surprised to see Ironhide hanging a television from a newly installed rack in the ceiling. The large red security officer grunted a greeting as Ratchet closed the cell, and gave the still figure on the berth a sideways glance.

"How'd it go?" He asked, brushing metal shavings off his large black hands and gathering his tools.

"Well I don't think that he'll be watching any T.V. for a few hours. Primus but those Cassettes are packed tight! I was starting to think we would have to remove his engine block to make room." The medic griped half sarcastically, before wagging his finger over the unconscious Cassetticon, "I hope you appreciate this you little fragger."

Ironhide snorted, "Not too likely. So it took longer than usual?"

"There's nothing usual about any of this Ironhide, but yeah, it took longer than I had expected." Ratchet answered as he set up an energon line and some monitoring equipment. "Vector Sigma, the first carrying I oversee in a million years and it's a fraggin' Deceptipunk."

"Only a million years?" Ironhide asked with a crooked half smile. "Some old medic bot need 'is memory chips checked?"

Ratchet narrowed his optics at his friend, his _old_ friend, "Hmph, now there's the tank calling the tractor bulky." He retorted lightly, then eyed the television. "What's –that- all about. I thought we weren't giving him TV until he talked to First Aid."

Ironhide wagged a finger at the medic, "Two cells." He rumbled slowly, "Two cells that little bumper wiper completely trashed before ya guy's took 'is drivers outta commission. Do you know how long it's gonna take fer me to get Grapple ta get those fixed." Ironhide's finger wag morphed into an almost melodramatic half clenched fist. "An I gotta work with _Grapple_." He almost moaned.

The boxy white medic waved his equally boxy red friend off, "Ah, it's probably for the best anyway. The more we can keep the little slagger from squirming around the better off they both are." Ratchet gave the unmoving 'Con on the berth a concerned stare. "I don't know Ironhide." He said slowly." I don't know if we're doing the right thing here. I don't know if this is what he really, truly, wants."

Ironhide turned away to adjust the TV rack. "He's a Decepticon," the old mech muttered, "who know's what any of 'em really want. The kid says don't terminate, don't argue."

"I suppose…" Ratchet answered as he keyed open the cell, "We'll I'm all done here. Kid's gonna be outta it for a while. We really had to do a number on him, like I said. First Aid should be around to check on him in a bit, so what you say we go get a couple—"

The medic was cut off by a loud beeping from the cell's communicator. "This is First Aid." Came the voice over the speaker, "Ratchet are you still there?"

"Yeah I'm still here," Ratchet replied, pushing the comm button in the cell.

"We just got a call in from Hound. The Decepticons are attacking a Hybrid Technologies drilling platform off the coast of Nova Scotia. The Protectobots and Powerglide are on it but they can't form Defensor without me. And they need you to play doctor. Hound says Cosmos already crashed."

Ironhide snorted.

"Skyfire's coming in to pick us up. He'll be here in four hundred seventy five astroseconds." First Aid continued.

"I hear you First Aid," Ratchet answered, "I'll meet you outside." He switched off the com, and both Autobots exited the cell, the medic making sure that the monitors were set up to display readings outside in the hall too. He faced the security officer. "Okay," he started, "I hope we'll be back before the kid comes around but if we're not keep an optic on him okay? Make sure he doesn't get too worked up or do anything stupid." He pointed to the monitors on the wall "If any of these readings slip into the yellow call First Aid and go get Hoist or Perceptor or both. If they slip into the red call me and First Aid right away, and go get Wheeljack too."

Ironhide had been more than half tempted to tag along on the mission. Pounding into some Decepticons sounded like the just the remedy he needed to get over the all unsettling business going on in his brig. But instead he nodded at Ratchet's instructions and committed them to his memory chips. He'd been entrusted to guard something, and by the Pit and Primus he was gonna do it.

Ratchet transformed and drove down the hall. Ironhide got ready to settle-in in the security wing. Maybe he would go see how much of the damage in the other cells he could take care of without Grapple's help. Then he saw a Ratchet's brake lights flash.

"Remember Ironhide," the medic called from the end of the hall, "Don't let him do anything stupid."

***

It was when he heard loud clanging coming from one cell over, not even an hour and a half later, that Ironhide knew that the kid was doing something stupid. He kicked over the pile of dented orange plating that he was sorting through as he ran from Frenzy's first cell and over to the doorway to his third.

"Dammit." Ironhide muttered as he saw the monitors on the wall dip into the yellow. He quickly keyed in the wall, not even bothering to turn on the energy bars first, and rushed into the room. He was almost instantly attacked.

"You big, stupid, spark-sucking, fleshy-loving, heap of cosmic rust!" Frenzy shouted almost insane with rage. "Why did you do it?! Why the hell did you do it!" Each insult was punctuated with a knuckle shattering punch to Ironhide's unyielding armored leg. The Decepticon's optic band was flashing wildly with fury, and he was dripping energon from where he'd torn the line from his chest.

_Dammit. "_First Aid, we got a code yellow and the kid is going nuts." Ironhide said forcefully into his comm. The Minicassette continued bashing into Ironhide's leg despite the fact it had to be hurting his hand more than it hurt the trylithium steel alloyed armor, and screaming swears almost nonsensically.

"Calm him down. Keep him still." A low voice rumbled through the speaker, "Defensor will be there soon."

_Fraggit! I don't need Defensor. I need First Aid. _Ironhide was getting more and more concerned as the monitors in the cell dipped closer and closer to the red. The large red Autobot dropped to his knees and grabbed one of the incensed Decepticon's arms. His effort earned him a solid punch to the side of the face that made his world briefly explode into stars and left his right optic sensor tingling.

"Why!?" Frenzy screamed, almost wailed, "Dammit! Tell! ME! WHY!" With each word he threw a fist that connected solidly with the side of Ironhide's helm. Finally the Autobot managed to catch the other arm, which only increased his panic as Frenzy began to struggle wildly with his whole body, pulling on either ensnared arm.

"Easy, kid, take it easy." Ironhide tried to shout soothingly over the Cassetticon's shouted obscenities. "What's wrong? What's going on?" Each time Frenzy twisted in his grip Ironhide felt a pang like a laser bolt hitting him right in the gut. "Take it easy, you're gonna hurt yourself." He shouted again, without anger, but with plenty of panicked frustration.

"I DON'T CARE!" Frenzy screamed, his optic band flashing blindingly red. "Tell me!" Then he suddenly curled over and purged right on Ironhide's knee.

_Great. _Ironhide thought , looking at his knee splashed with acidic pink goo. He sat down on the floor, still keeping his grip on Frenzy's arms and tried to gently guide the Mini-Cassette to a sitting position as well. The red and black mech was sucking air into his intakes rapidly now, as if he were paralyzed with anger. But the Decepticon sat down.

"Why did you do it?" He muttered spitting out residual purge, "I told you not to."

Ironhide sighed and dropped the Decepticon's arms. He wasn't the least bit surprised when the little fragger started punching him weakly in the leg, passively. "Kid, what the hell are you talking about?"

"I told you not to…that I wouldn't let you…" His optic band was dimmer and he leaned against Ironhide's leg. "I told it I wouldn't let you."

Ironhide started putting two and two together, but he had to be positive. He didn't want the kid going off on him again. He was almost sure that neither of them could handle it. "We didn't take your sparkling kid…" he said tentatively, "I know we didn't."

Frenzy collapsed backwards onto Ironhide's leg. His hand over his chest, "I can't feel it anymore." He said hollowly. "You took it, you son of a bitch."

Ironhide sighed, though he was deeply troubled by the haunted look on the Cassetticon's face. He gently took Frenzy's wrist between his thumb and forefinger and moved the hand down about a foot. "There." He said. "That's where it is now. It moved down out of your spark casing. That's why you can't feel it up there anymore."

Frenzy froze, feeling and recognizing the familiar warmth, even the pulse though it was now fainter, in a new place. His anger at the Autobots dissipated for the moment, to be replaced with anger at himself for being so stupid.

Letting him rest a moment against his leg Ironhide looked up at the monitors, they were still in the yellow. _Thank Primus._ He looked back down at the exhausted little Decepticon. "You really gotta start picking on someone yer own size." He muttered, then gently helped the Decepticon up and back onto the berth.

Frenzy flipped him the bird, before he noticed the television. "Hey, what the slag?" he said weakly, "We got TV now?"

Ironhide sighed, rubbing at his optics, and handed the Mini Cassette the remote.


	6. Chapter 6

First Aid was speeding through the turning twisting hallways of Autobot Headquarters. Defensor might have been completely stoic about the situation, but the second First Aid had his mind to himself again the only thing he could think of was the condition of his patient. He had to resist the urge to turn on his sirens and lights, knowing in his core that the other Autobots knew better than to stand in his way. They might not know who it was he was rushing to help, but they knew not to get between First Aid and a patient in need of treatment.

He skidded to a stop outside Frenzy's cell. As he transformed a large puddle of oily sea water pooled around him. He didn't even notice. As he keyed in to open the cell he heard a loud shout, in Frenzy's voice, from within. A quick glance at the monitors told him that his patient was now back in the green, though still dancing way too close to yellow for comfort. Still, he relaxed slightly at the sight.

The sight in the cell itself would have made him smile quizzically, if he'd had a mouth to smile with.

"It doesn't slaggin' make any sense!" Frenzy cried from the berth, gesturing in disbelief at the television, "he shoulda known the one Black Adam guy would turn the knife on him! And, I mean, he was going so slaggin' slow! What the frag? This show sucks driveshaft."

Ironhide grunted and nodded mutely at the medic who had just entered. "I told ya, it's just a show. An' the Cartwrights always end up winning their fights," he grumbled from his position propped up against the wall.

Frenzy ignored Ironhide to stare at the dripping medic who was closing up the cell again. "Geeze doc, you look like slag." He jeered. "What the hell happened to you?"

First Aid paused to consider, but decided that telling the Decepticon couldn't hurt. "A slight run in with some of your comrades. Nothing that Defensor couldn't handle," he remarked as he noted the reattached energon line. He opened the container that was permanently in the cell now and began running scans. Ironhide hit the mute button just as Little Joe rode in to the Ponderosa on his painted horse.

Frenzy sat up in excitement. "Really? Where? Who? Was Soundwave there? Did any Autobozos get fragged?" The Cassetticon practically trembled with anticipation.

Ironhide leaned his head against the wall with a clang and rubbed at his optic sensors blearily. It had been one heck of time keeping the kid _this_ still for a couple hours, now First Aid had to come in a rile him all up again.

The doctor ignored his patient and looked at Ironhide, "Who came in and looked at him?"

"Hoist came in. Reattached the line, but said the kid was stable enough to wait fer you ta come back." Ironhide answered shifting his weight from one foot to another.

"Hellooo… slag suckers!" Frenzy waved his hand and snapped, "I'm right here…"

First Aid nodded as he approached his patient. "Frenzy can you lie back for me?" he asked gently, "I want to make sure that you didn't jar anything loose."

The Mini-Cassette jabbed a finger at the medic, "How's about _you_ fraggin tellin me what happened in the fight, and _then_ I'll let you prod around in my chest to your widdle spark's content?"

The medic put his hands on his hips impassively. "How about _you_ let me determine if your little tantrum has put your sparkling in distress, and _then_ I'll tell you about how your Decepticon comrades retreated the second Defensor showed up on the scene?" he replied calmly. Ironhide grinned to himself. _Guess the doc's got some backstrut after all…_

Frenzy glared, but lay back and let First Aid open his chest plates. "Thank you." The doctor said serenely, "Now what exactly did you want to know about the fight?"

The Decepticon wiggled a bit, anxiously. "Everything."

"You'll have to be more specific."

The patient on the table groaned in frustration. "Who was there? Who fragged who? What did they want? Did they get away with it?" he spelled out slowly and forcefully and sarcastically, like he was talking to one of Shockwave's sentinels. Or Buzzsaw.

First Aid pulled out a light that allowed him a better view of the inside of Frenzy's rearranged chest. "Oh, the usual crew was there. Starscream, Megatron, Thundercracker. They were attacking an oil rig. Very creative of them."  
Ironhide had to choke down a laugh, disguising it with a cough.

"Was Soundwave there?"

"Yes." The medic shifted his gaze momentarily from his patient's chest to his face.

"Wha'd he do?"

"He retreated."

"I mean _before_ that, you dumb slagger!" Frenzy sighed, trying to peer into his chest without craning his neck, half-curious.

"Before that he fought." First Aid answered, then hummed to himself thoughtfully as he turned to dig through his container. Ironhide couldn't tell if the other Autobot was being frustrating on purpose or not anymore, but either way it was funny as hell. The kid on the table squirmed, and was about to snap, when the medic finally turned back to the berth with a small silver canister. "I'm going to give your systems a little boost with an injection of extra nanites. It will help your sparkling develop, since my scans are showing that your cosmotron still isn't producing them fast enough."

Frenzy practically collapsed back onto the berth, weighted down the sheer force of dumfounded exasperation. And for the first time in his life he was too tired to get really good and mad, even though Pit knows he had a good reason.

"Did they get away with any energon?" he sighed through clenched teeth.

"I think Starscream may have gotten away with a few cubes, since he led the retreat." First Aid answered as he administered the nanites. "No one on either side was significantly injured."

"Was Rumble out?"

Again, First Aid watched his patient's face, "Yes. And so was Ravage, and that bird-looking one."

"Laserbeak?"

"No, the other one…he didn't do very well in the fight."

Frenzy snorted. "'Atta boy Buzzy," he muttered. "Makin' us all proud." He drummed his fingers against the berth nervously, occasionally peeking down into his chest as well as he could. "Did…did uh…anyone…" he shifted a bit, uncomfortably, even though First Aid wasn't doing anything too invasive. "Did anyone ask about me?"

First Aid closed Frenzy's chest up, and looked hard at his patient. "No." he said finally. "No one mentioned you."

There was a flash from Frenzy's visor. It could have been surprise or anger but since the rest of his face had become an emotionless mask First Aid couldn't tell. The medic thought it was time to change the subject. "Well," he started, "thankfully you don't seem to have stressed the sparkling too badly. But remember Frenzy every time you push the limits like that you are reducing your sparkling's chances of survival."

The Mini-Cassette made a big show of ignoring the Autobots in the room, but First Aid knew he was listening. "If you want to do what's best for both of you then you need to rest, recharge, take it easy, and not burn off one microspark more energy than you need to." First Aid's voice became both earnest and firm as steel, "You had a choice Frenzy, but the choice was between yes and no. I'm not going to let you do this half-way. I'm not going to risk your safety by letting you continue carrying, and then continue to jeopardize yourself."

The Decepticon had a heck of a pokerface, but Ironhide watched his fingers twitch uncertainly as the medic stood right next to the berth and stared at optical sensors that refused to look back. "You're either on board, or you're not. And if you're on board then you're going to do what you need to do to make this work. Okay?"

First Aid waited patiently for a long time never taking his eyes off his patient. Ironhide got the impression that he was completely prepared to wait for the next hour if need be. The mute cowboys on the television had a fistfight, rode into town, and were just tying up their horses outside the saloon before Frenzy nodded ever so slightly. First Aid patted the Decepticon on the shoulder. "Okay then."

The medic packed up his case and locked it. "I'm done here," He said, pleasantly. "You should rest as much as you can Frenzy, so not too much television."

The Mini-Cassette snorted and sat up "This show sucks to Cybertron and back anyway!" he called loudly as First Aid left the room.

Ironhide was debating whether to leave or not. He actually had some things that he wanted to talk to First Aid about, stuff he thought that…

"Hey!" the kid on the berth exclaimed, "Why the slag's the show still on mute? They're fighting again!"

Ironhide shook his head and turned the sound back on. _I'll just stay till the end of this episode_, he thought. _Someone's gotta make sure the kid don't do anything stupid._

_***_

"How long?" Prime asked.

First Aid cocked his head to one side, figuring. "Normal gestation is two to three months, depending on make and model, but in this case I would say the longer the better for the sparkling, the shorter the better for the carrier."

Optimus nodded, sorting reports from the day's battle with one hand and doing calculations on his datapad with the other. "And then what?"

First Aid was confused, "And then what what?"

Optimus Prime was too busy to be frustrated. There were human governments and corporations to contact, warriors to debrief, experiments to approve, patents to apply for, and somewhere in it all he had to find time to recharge for at least a few hours. "And then what are his plans?"

First Aid shrugged, "We hadn't discussed it."

Optimus Prime sighed, "First Aid, I need more information from him. Now. Carrying or not he is still a Decepticon and thus a potential liability. We need to know his plans and his intentions, and the situation he came from. Especially since this is bound to get around to the rest of the Autobots soon enough."

"I've told everyone on the medical staff to be discrete…"

Optimus brushed a datapad aside to reach the one below it. "Oh, Wheeljack can't keep a secret to save his solenoids," he rumbled distractedly. "One way or another this is going to get out before two months are up. And you know that some of them aren't going to…be comfortable with it."

"Prime, I really don't think…"

Optimus cut the doctor off again without even realizing it, only seeking to make the best use of his time. "I know. No one is going to hurt him, especially not now. But I'm not so sure Frenzy wouldn't get into some fights on his own if he had the chance. And you know they'll be curious too."

First Aid couldn't argue with that. "What do you want me to tell him?"

Optimus had to stop his work to think about that one. He hadn't had much time to consider the next step either. Whenever the carrying Mini-Cassette entered his mind he was filled with an anger that he suspected kept him from thinking about it objectively. "I am not letting him go until he tells us the situation surrounding his…condition. And I am not letting him go until I know what will happen to the sparkling should it return with him."

First Aid had to cut in, though it went against his nature. This was something he felt very strongly about, "Prime, I will not let him go back still carrying if the Decepticons will only terminate the sparkling. I'll terminate it before I'll let that hack Hook do it."

Prime nodded drumming his fingers against his datapad, fighting the dark thoughts that had been haunting his recharge cycles for the past few days. "And First Aid, tell him that I am willing to grant him, and his sparkling, asylum and amnesty. But I have to be able to trust him first if he's going to be allowed any freedom around the base. And he has to trust us. That's why I _must_ know just what happened." Optimus pressed his fingers to his optics, fighting the anger that was perhaps unwarranted. "Because if he's been abused, he is _not_ going back. Period."

First Aid was unsure. "That's an awful invasion of privacy Prime, just on the chance that—"

"There are some chances," Prime said slowly, "that I am not willing to take."


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thanks again to everyone who's been watching and faving this story. And a big shout-out to all my reviewers. (Especially you Skyjack!)Sorry this update was a little longer coming than the others. As always please Read and Review!

***

Two weeks later and Frenzy had been recharging when he was asked, refueling when he was asked, and staying as still as he ever had outside of Soundwave's chest. But he wasn't telling anyone anything about anything. Not that he hadn't been asked. Every time First Aid came in to give him his rations, or hook up an energon line, or do another of those damn endless scans he'd tried to broach the subject. But Frenzy didn't want to talk about the who, what, when, where, why, and how of anything dealing with himself personally. Such topics were answered with silence or swearing. The only thing that Frenzy would consent to have a conversation about was television, or fights. And he was always willing, even eager, to talk about fights on television. He would spout off loudly about whatever show he was watching, only to instantly clam up when First Aid started guiding the conversation to more delicate matters, even when he was trying to be subtle about it.

First Aid was in a tight spot. He was hesitant to make the few waking hours Frenzy had stressful. Because, while Frenzy spent nearly twenty-two out of every twenty-four hours resting and recharging, his rest was hardly restful. Though he lay motionless, with his processor offline, the monitors clearly showed that the rest of his systems were failing to shut-down completely; and this was only getting worse as the days wore on. He was recharging almost constantly, refueling through energon lines and his tanks, not doing anything physical, and he was still exhausted. Of course, Frenzy hadn't wanted to talk about THIS either. Completely stumped for solutions First Aid had finally been forced to contact Blaster and tell him everything, confidentially of course since only high-ranking 'Bots, Tracks, and the medical staff even knew they had a Decepticon in custody. First Aid wanted to see if there was something about Cassettes that had been over looked. Eject and Rewind had informed him that not only do Cassettes spend most of the time resting when folded up in their unit's chest; they also have a very hard time slipping into recharge in robot mode on a berth, especially when alone.

It was the 'especially when alone' bit that had Ironhide sitting in a corner of the dimmed cell watching Bonanza again. The old Autobot had tried to distance himself from the situation, he really had. Primus knew he had better things to do than babysit a napping Decepticon. But First Aid kept getting called out at the worst times, his dual position as a medic and part of a major combiner making him needed on the field even when Decepticons weren't involved. Whereas Ironhide…was just another soldier it seemed, easily replaced with another grunt when he was proving more useful elsewhere. Like here.

A few too many days spent fixing dented-up cells, where he was close enough to get called on when the medics got called out, and suddenly Ironhide was the go-to guy when Frenzy needed company and the Protectobots needed First Aid. Though Ratchet and Hoist had both put in some time, they'd agreed that Ironhide was best at it after First Aid. On some level Frenzy seemed to respect the gruff, red Autobot. Ironhide was sure it was because he had, on occasion, kicked the little punk's trash. So the Security 'Bot had spent several hours of the past eight days watching TV and occasionally listening to extremely foulmouthed, one-sided conversations on just how horrible TV was.

_Thank Primus the kid is sleeping now_. He had nodded off right before the horse trampled the Spanish gunman that Adam was fighting, which was a shame because Ironhide knew the Frenzy would have loved it. His optics flickered away from the screen of the TV and to the screen of the monitors, checking for the hundredth time that Frenzy's systems were recharging like they should. Technically he could leave now. Once the little 'Con was good and asleep he would work his way through a long, deep recharge cycle on his own, and it would take a train wreck happening outside his cell to wake him. He just needed someone there with him for a few hours as he drifted off, and apparently it didn't matter if the person watching him had, in the past, tried to shoot him in the face with molten lead.

Ironhide had made up his mind to stay for the rest of the episode when he heard a soft tapping at the cell's door. He gave the sleeping Decepticon, and the monitors that assured him that the kid was really and truly sleeping, one last look before he exited the dimmed cell. Ratchet was waiting for him outside.

"Yeah?" he asked as he keyed the lock shut.

"Red Alert wants to talk to you right away." The medic replied, unable to completely hide his delight at delivering bad news. "He says it's important."

Ironhide gritted his dental plates. "With Red Alert when is't NOT important?" he muttered rhetorically. "Don' suppose you have any idea what this is 'bout?"

"I could guess…"

"Yeah, well so can I…"Ironhide sighed, his gears already in a grind before he even saw the twitchy bastard. "It's about the damn kid again. Red just won't let it go. Wants us to tie the little fragger to a chair and make him talk. Pull Prowl in. Do bad-cop, boring-cop until he snaps."

The medic started looking up past readings on the monitors while Ironhide continued. "I mean, if things were different, I would be sayin' the same thing. But look at 'im…" he trailed off for a moment. "Took me two hours to get 'im good and asleep. Two hours. Little punk wanted to watch boxing, and I knew he wouldn't recharge if that was on. Only thing the kid'll fall for is those damn cowboy shows."

Ratchet snorted, "You make one heck of a babysitter, Ironhide. Too bad the rest of the 'Bots don't know what a big softy you've been."

"An you'd make one heck of a paper weight." Ironhide grumbled back, a little embarrassed and too depressed at the concept of a conversation with Red Alert to even register the compliment disguised as a taunt. "Better go see what I can do ta make sure Red doesn' get what he wants." He mumbled.

Ratchet watched the big red mech go, knowing for a fact that, slow as he was, he could move a lot faster than that. He turned back to the monitor, still displaying past readings, and shook his head. _Less than two hours_, he thought, _took him less than two hours to get Frenzy to recharge._

It had taken Ratchet four and a half the last time he'd been on call.

***

Red Alert waited until the door to his office was completely latched and locked before he started in on his fellow Security Bot, but Ironhide could tell that waiting those few seconds nearly killed him. The mech's desk was a deceptively messy looking pile of datapads. Both 'Bots knew full well that Red Alert knew where each one was, and what exactly was on it.

"I don't like this," he started, and Ironhide had to suppress a sigh, "I don't like this one bit."

"Whadda you want us to do?" Ironhide asked thinly, toying with the idea of just letting himself get angry.

The Lamborghini waggled a finger. "We need to know what he knows now! And we need to know it now! I recall telling Optimus Prime this two weeks ago, but apparently I've been ignored! Your gloves-on approach has gotten us nowhere. We need to question the Decepticon, get what information he has, and then I want him moved to a more secure location!"

Ironhide clenched his fists, tempted to show Red Alert just what a gloves-off approach would be like. Red Alert undoubtedly noticed this, but continued on just the same. "And what's this about granting the Decepticon amnesty? Since when does having a sparkling make you immune to punishment for past misdeeds? Or carrying one make you immune to questioning for valuable, perhaps lifesaving, information?"

Ironhide decided he would keep a lid on it just long enough to say his piece and then he would leave. Or else he might just end up in the brig along with the kid. "Look Red," he started, each word a barely restrained growl dripping with frustration, "it's not yer call to make. An' it's not mine either. Optimus can grant whatever the hell he wants ta whoever the hell he wants." The big red mech was looming over the other 'Bot now. " Ya may be Security Director, Red, but I still outrank you. An' I don' care if the kid's bombed a preschool and has the formula fer fade-resistant electrum, as long as he's carrying we're not doing anythin' that might hurt 'im." He poked Red Alert once in the chest, just hard enough to make him flinch. "'Cuz, we're Autobots, and there's jus' some things we don' do."

Ironhide turned to go, almost glad that he'd had the chance to clarify to someone else out loud why it was he was letting a little punk Decepticon walk all over him.

"Ironhide, I need information." Red pleaded. "For security's sake. What are we going to do if the Decepticons come for him?"

Ironhide paused one second. "I never said I wasn't gonna get information, Red," he answered with a touch a condescension. "But I'm gonna get the information _I_ want. An' I'm gonna do it my way."

Red Alert was left alone in his office, going over datapads, each scrap of information hinting so loudly to Red of hidden dangers that only he had the wherewithal to notice.

"I don't like this," the Security Director protested to himself, "I don't like this one micron."

***

It wasn't a train wreck outside his cell that made Frenzy come out of recharge early. In fact, as his processor came back online slowly the little Cassetticon realized he didn't know why he'd woken up. All he knew is that he wanted to go back to sleep, and he probably wouldn't be able to. He lay on the berth, blearily batting away his fuzzy thoughts as they came creeping out of the shadows. He couldn't think and fall asleep at the same time. So he ignored the bare emptiness of the room, he ignored the dim glint of the monitor's lights reflecting on the obnoxiously orange walls, and he ignored the warmth and pulse low in his chest, settled beneath his spark chamber.

_They ain't come for you yet… _Frenzy automatically grimaced as the living nightmare he'd been doing his best to ignore reared its ugly head again. _Two weeks…and they ain't come for you yet… _Shutting off his optic band and willing himself to stay still the Mini-Cassette repeated what had become his mantra, the only thing that kept him from snapping and burning off all his hard won energy by destroying anything and everything in sight_. Idon'tcareIdon'tcareIdon'tcareIdon'tslaggincareatall…_

Two weeks. Two weeks of nothing but sleeping, television, and avoiding questions. Every day that passed only increased the Decepticon's confusion, which only increased his despair, which only made him work harder and harder to ignore everything real, both around him and inside him. And half the time he was alone, which drove him crazy since it meant he was alone with his thoughts and no one to verbally abuse when he needed to. And half the time he was with fraggin' Autobots, who refused to be baited, refused to talk about fights on television for more than half an hour, and always tried to ask him about--

Frenzy froze suddenly, as he felt something. He waited in the dark cell alone, all his sensors on high-alert. _There it is again!_ Whatever it was that woke him up… was happening again. And it was happening inside him. Something moving? The Decepticon forgot everything he'd been working so hard to ignore and focused all his attention inward.

Something, and something that wasn't him, was definitely doing something deep inside his chest. It felt like something was loose, or twisting, or brushing against his insides. Frenzy felt a strange tickling feeling at the base of his spark chamber that spread upwards to fill his whole spark with something like a warm gentle lightning strike. He didn't know what he was feeling, but it wasn't bad, and it made him wanna destroy an entire city block from the sheer excitement of it. He put one hand over the feeling and willed it to go on forever; not really thinking, only experiencing. _It's the sparkling_, he realized, _it's moving_.

'_They ain't gonna let you keep it!'_ Rumble's sudden voice was harsh in Frenzy's mind. _'If it's yours it's gonna be a useless little sawed off scrap!'_ Frenzy grimaced against the memory, all the warm and gentle lightning gone.

He punched the wall. Hard. Then he kept punching the wall until he felt dizzy, even though he knew that First Aid would probably give him hell about it later. _Idon'tcareIdon'tcaredammitIdon'tcaredammitIdon'tcaredammitdammitdammitdammit… _

Frenzy pulled back his fist again feeling hot sticky energon welling up from cracks in his knuckles. He slammed his fist into the wall again and felt a sharp pain radiate up his arm. _I. Don't. Care!_ He repeated to himself, breaking his knuckles against the wall with every word. _It. Doesn't. Matter!_

He made a face like a silent scream and pulled his arm back again, he slammed his now numb hand against the dented energon stained wall so hard his whole body shook with it. _Soundwave an' the others are gonna…_

He froze. _Two weeks._ He curled in on himself, "He's gonna come for me." he whispered. But in his spark…he didn't believe it.

'_He don't care.'_ Rumble's voice echoed in Frenzy's mind. "He don't care…" Frenzy mumbled watching the energon on the wall start to dry and congeal. He was feeling dizzy.

But then, he should be used to that by now.

Frenzy was dizzy, and disoriented, and the purple walls of Decepticon headquarters all looked the same when optic sensors were still a little fried. He stumbled through the halls, staring way up to the tops of the doors trying to remember through his pounding processor ache where Soundwave's quarters were without remembering too much. _Not that there was anything bad to remember—_

Frenzy suddenly flinched as a tall shadow crossed over him. But it was only Thundercracker. The blue seeker paused a moment and looked down at the Cassetticon standing dazed in his shade, then shook his head, almost sadly, and continued on down the hall. Frenzy watched him go, willing the floor to stop bucking beneath him with every step. _Pit, I'm tired…and…_he batted the thought away, as he finally dragged himself to Soundwave's quarters. _Just get back to Soundwave,_ he'd told himself, almost from the very beginning, _He'll deal with all this slag. He'll take care of things._

Soundwave was still up, at his workstation. Waiting for him. And Frenzy couldn't help feeling a massive wave of relief wash over him. _Soundie'll take care of things,_ he thought, trying to ignore the way each of his circuits felt like it had been dipped in corrosive, trying even harder to ignore the dull ache in his chest. Deep in his—

_Soundie'll take care of things._ He reminded himself, and he tried to brush some of the haze away with a trembling hand. _He'll sort this whole slaggin' thing out._ Soundwave stood from his workstation, obviously aware that his Cassette had entered. There was a long pause, where Soundwave stared at the wall in front of him. Not looking at the tired, confused, Mini-Cassette at his feet.

Finally the tall blue mech pushed a button on his shoulder and his tape-deck swung open.

"Frenzy: Return." He said impassively.

Frenzy froze. He was tired, he was confused, dammit all he was…hurt. And Soundie was supposed to take care of things. "Boss?" He started. Unsure.

Soundwave still wouldn't look at him. He only repeated himself. "Frenzy: Return."

Frenzy wouldn't, couldn't move, "Uhh…" He staggered a bit.

The tall Decepticon finally faced him, staring at him almost impassively. Almost.

"Immediately." He commanded firmly, but with the barest hint of pity. Pity that only one of his cassettes could have recognized. Somehow it made it all worse.

Frenzy hung his head, forced himself to transform, and entered the dark oblivion of Soundwave's chest.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Thought that I would give you guys a back to back double day dose of Frenzy fuzz. I've been doing this story as a sort of casual NaNoWriMo, so that's why the updates are rather frequent. Here's hoping I can keep it up. Thanks for reading.

***

First Aid had noticed that the monitors outside Frenzy's cell were in the yellow, but that didn't concern him too much. According to Perceptor's calculations as the sparkling grew and started pulling more and more energy from Frenzy's systems it would be next to impossible to keep him in the green all the time. The energon that the doctor was about to give the Decepticon should pull his reserves back up for a while. As soon as the cell opened though, First Aid was concerned. It was dim, too dim to make things out clearly, but he instantly, instinctively, felt that something was wrong even before his processor had a chance to assess the rest of the situation.

Frenzy was curled up on the berth facing the wall, which was a position he used more for brooding than for recharging. He must have come out of recharge early, which also wasn't too unusual. There was something else though. First Aid scanned the room carefully. His concern became real worry when he saw that there was dried energon on the wall by the berth. Not very much, but First Aid didn't waste any time reaching his patient's side.

"Frenzy. What did you do?" He asked as he reached for the Cassetticon's damaged hand. The Decepticon kept facing the wall, glaring at the orange plating peppered with fresh dents like it was the source of all his problems. He let the Autobot touch his banged up, energon stained, fist; but only because he seemed bound and determined not to shift a servo. First Aid tried to uncurl the fingers, but Frenzy didn't let him.

First Aid sat down on the berth next to the unmoving Mini-Cassette, for the first time allowing himself to be at a loss in front of his patient. Nothing he or anyone else was doing was getting through to the little Decepticon; and having something that was constantly hurting and stubbornly refusing to be fixed weighing on his processor all the time was finally starting to wear through First Aid's nearly inexhaustible patience. Ironhide had spoken with him earlier about the conversation he'd had with Red Alert. Though he'd assured the doctor that he wasn't going to let Red anywhere near the carrying Cassetticon, it had finally sunk in to First Aid that he was no closer to getting the information that Prime had asked for than the first day Frenzy had arrived.

He reached for Frenzy's hand again, examining it as well as he could without really moving it, then examining the stained dents on the wall. His grip drifted up slightly and squeezed gently at the wrist joint. He was rewarded by a sharp hiss, and was torn between relief at getting some reaction and remorse for causing pain.

"Frenzy," he said quietly, "please, let me see."

"Slag, don' you have some stupid scans to do or something?" the Decepticon muttered sourly without moving.

"In a moment, yes. But right now I want to look at your hand." First Aid replied, and then waited through the long silence he'd gotten used to having to sit through. He knew that at the end of the silence Frenzy would either do as he'd been asked, or snap at him. But First Aid wanted to make it very clear that he would not go away, and the subject wouldn't change, if simply ignored.

"Fuuuuuck…" Frenzy sighed finally and rolled over onto his back. He held his arm out to the Autobot and glared venomously at the ceiling. First Aid took his hand and began examining the hairline cracks in the plating and the dents in the knuckles. As he bent a finger Frenzy hissed louder this time and used his good hand to flip the doctor off. His gesture was ignored as First Aid continued to carefully and gently move each joint through its full range of motion, earning him a lot more swearing, some of it quite creative.

Most of the pain was from damage to the hydraulic and energon lines beneath the plating. The tears in the lines had already resealed themselves with nanites and most of the damage would repair on its own. Though it would take more time than usual since Frenzy's systems were shunting most of his nanites to the protoform pod to build the sparkling. The fact that the plating had cracked rather than buckled was worrisome though. His armor was brittle, which meant that his body was diverting nanites from it too.

"Hmmm…" First Aid thought to himself as he turned to the locked container and retrieved a gentle solvent and a cloth to clean Frenzy's hand with. "So what did you do that for?" he asked benignly.

Frenzy laughed his hollow bitter laugh. "You'd do it too if you'd been stuck in a stupid slaggin orange box for two weeks and been forced to watch freakin human television all the time."

"I thought you liked TV?" First Aid carefully rotated the small, dented hand palm up and poured a bit of solvent into each of the joints. Frenzy made a face.

"You fraggers don't even have pay-per-view! It's just squishy old squishies talking to each other about other sad, stupid squishies. Damn NBC."

"What about that cowboy show you and Ironhide watch?"

"It's the slaggin' old-timer that likes that show, not me. Heh, the old rust bucket loves that retarded cowboy crap." Frenzy winced as First Aid rotated his hand back around to clean the other side. "He likes the big dumb cowboy on it cuz he's a big dumb slagger like him."

First Aid turned to put the solvent away. "Which cowboy is that?" He asked.

"Slag if I know. You think I care what squishy little humans call themselves? I mean, damn, they all look alike to me. What kind of reject species only comes in shades of brown or pink? What the frag is wrong with purple?" First Aid shrugged as he pulled out his scanner. Frenzy glared at it like one would an old adversary. One of his recurring fantasies over the past few weeks was smashing an entire assembly line of medical scanners, followed by an entire assembly line of energon lines, and then he would pound his way through a big stack of orange plating, smash it all into a huge pile of lumpy slag and then get Laserbeak to blast the whole thing into charred, melty oblivion.

"Hoss." Frenzy said suddenly.

"What?"

"The big dumb cowboy that the big Autobot likes, he's Hoss."

First Aid nodded as he continued his scans, making a mental note to ask Ironhide about the cowboy show later. "Unusual name, is it?"

"Pit, I don'…" Frenzy trailed off and shifted slightly. First Aid watched the readings on his scanner and smiled to himself. _There it goes. A little late, but there it is finally._

"What is it?" He asked casually as he watched the little Cassetticon's hand twitch up to graze the side of his chest before he tried to hide the gesture with a stretch. He shifted again, his hand drumming against the berth.

"I…uhh…" Frenzy stared off into space, distractedly. "Slag." He whispered.

First Aid eagerly saw the moment of vulnerability he'd been waiting for and pounced on it. He adopted an extremely concerned posture and pressed random keys frantically on his scanner. "What?" He asked seriously staring at the scanner, "What's going on? Frenzy, What do you feel?"

Instantly Frenzy was worried too. It was written all over his faceplates and it gave First Aid an intense feeling of relief. _He does care…we did do the right thing._

"What?" the Mini-Cassette parroted nervously, glancing at the monitors then craning his head to try and look at the scanner, as if he would suddenly be able to understand any of it. He was tapping at his chest obviously now and the Autobot watched him carefully to make sure that he wasn't taking this charade too far. "What's wrong?" he asked haltingly.

First Aid approached him and Frenzy instantly lay flat on the berth. "I'm not sure." He said gravely. "I'll need you to open your chest plates so that I can get a clearer scan. The Decepticon immediately complied. "Now…" he started as he scanned again, though he had to ignore a slight stab of worry when his scanner registered the sparkling's size. _It should be bigger by now…_ But he couldn't let real concern get in the way of fake concern. "Now Frenzy, tell me exactly what you feel."

"Uhh..I feel like, a twisting, feeling thing. Slag. I mean. Uh. It tickles. And aww hell…" Frenzy was drumming against the berth with both hands now so completely consumed with anxiety that he forgot entirely about how much it didn't matter. In his panic he forgot that it was a sawed off little runt that nobody was gonna want anyway.

He stared at the medic while he pecked at his scanner. "Are you worried?" First Aid asked.

"Yes. I mean no. I mean, frag. What the Pit is going on? It feels like stuff is happening in there."

The Autobot tapped at his faceplates and nodded knowingly. "Your sparkling is kicking." He said, unable to hide the smile in his voice. _Primus but I always love telling them that,_ he thought to himself, _even if they are little Decepticon punks._ "It's nothing to be concerned about."

As he watched the moment of relief before Frenzy regained control of his emotions again First Aid felt a deep satisfaction. _Especially if they are little Decepticon punks,_ he decided.

"Frag," Frenzy muttered, "I coulda told you that. The way you were acting I thought my whole slaggin chest was about to blow."

First Aid continued scanning, carefully this time, collecting all the data he could on the sparkling. "You've felt it kick before?"

Frenzy nodded, "Yeah, the little fragger woke me up. I mean…" he shifted again nervously.

First Aid watched his patient's face very carefully, thankful for the thousandth time that he could do so while still seeming to look at his scanner. The benefits of an optic band. "Was that the first time? Earlier today?" he asked.

Frenzy shrugged and traced the dents on the orange panel beside him. "I guess."

"Was this before or after you punched the wall?" He knew that he was getting into murky waters here. The Decepticon was likely to clam up at any moment. But he just had to ask, because some things were only starting to make sense. The Mini-Cassette scraped some of the dried energon off with his good hand. First Aid pretended to ignore the way Frenzy was clenching his bad hand tightly, squeezing his fist in a way that had to hurt. "Why did you punch the wall?" His voice was coaxing. And then he let silence reign, curious to see how it would be ended since the Mini-Cassette hadn't retorted immediately with swearing.

"Is it gonna be okay?" Frenzy asked softly, almost to the wall. Like half of him was pretending like he wasn't asking the question.

"What do you mean?" First Aid was tentative, not wanting to wreck this strange mood of openness by asking the wrong question in the wrong way. _Primus, I've had open spark surgeries on a minefield that weren't as prickly as this._

"Just tell me how it is. And tell me everything." Frenzy's voice was slow and flat and reluctant.

"You mean about the sparkling?"

The Mini-Cassette nodded. "I mean about everything."

Rather than try and puzzle that last sentence out First Aid jumped eagerly but carefully into the well of information that he'd been trying to impart on Frenzy for the last two weeks. The Decepticon lay there staring at the energon flecked wall, seemingly unaware of the way his damaged hand had migrated right over his chest.

"There's never any guarantee in this sort of thing Frenzy. And you're more at risk from this than most. The smaller the carrier's frame the more complicated everything becomes. Your sparkling is a little on the small side right now, smaller than I would like to see I mean. So I'm going to increase your dose of nanites and make sure you've got enough raw materials circulating through your systems. Still, it's kicking, and that's always a good sign that things are going as they should. Other than its size I'm not detecting any other problems with it. I'm estimating that you are at least at the halfway point of the carrying cycle. Though birth is triggered more by maturity of the sparkling than by time, I am unsure if we will be able to wait until birth begins naturally. If your systems are under too much strain I will deliver you early, though the longer your sparkling has to develop inside the better its chances are."

"What are the chances?" Frenzy mumbled, tracing the dents again.

First Aid knew he had to choose his words very carefully. He wanted to be honest with the Decepticon, but he didn't want the carrying mech to become too worried. "There is still a lot that can happen between now and delivery, and so much will depend on how you hold up and when you deliver, but given what we know now I would say your sparkling's chances of survival are seventy-five to eighty-five percent. Small sparklings…they just sometimes have a hard time. Their systems are fragile and without proper care they won't be able to adjust."

A shift from Frenzy let First Aid know that the sparkling was likely kicking again. "Those are pretty good chances, considering." He added.

"How long am I gonna have ta…?" Frenzy finally turned to the medic, since this was very important.

"The earliest you could possibly deliver and have the sparkling have a chance of survival is two and a half, three weeks. Ideally you should carry for another five to six weeks."

"Six weeks of slaggin Bonanza…" Frenzy sighed, drumming against his chest, then he stopped. "That… isn't gonna hurt it? Is it?"

First Aid shook his head, "Oh no, the sparkling probably likes the attention."

Frenzy almost smiled, but it faded away as quickly as it had come. "How big's it gonna be?"

First Aid did some calculations, "Not very big by Transformer standards, but certainly big enough for you to handle."

"No…I mean…later. Would it always be little?" there was a shadow on Frenzy's face, and First Aid knew that there was something going on he didn't understand.

"Adult size is dependent on the carrier. It may be smaller than you, but it will never be bigger."

Something about this caused Frenzy to retreat a little again.

"Frenzy," he needed to get this out now, so that the Cassetticon would have time to think about it. "Optimus Prime has said that he is willing to let you and your sparkling stay. Indefinitely, and with full protection. And if you'll talk to me about…about what happened before we captured you, and if we feel like we can trust you, we'll be able to let you out of the cell and around the base. But we need to be able to trust you. And you need to tell us what happened."

He left it at that, and rather than force the issue and end this on a negative note First Aid thought it would be best to leave the end of the conversation open before Frenzy decided to end it himself.

"Well, I'm sure that you are hungry." The Autobot said, turning to his container and pulling out a cube of specially formulated energon laced with nanites and heavy metals.

Frenzy sat up with a groan, "Actually I would kill for some high grade. I ain't had a decent drink in two months."

First Aid froze, horrified. "You don't really know much about carrying… do you?"

The little mech sighed. "I already know more than I want…now slagging pass me that cube."

The doctor complied, then started in hooking up an additional energon line. Frenzy flipped on the TV and started channel surfing.

"So." First Aid asked, since he wanted to keep the Decepticon talking even if it wasn't about anything important. "So which one is the coyboy in the green shirt."

Frenzy snorted, "That whiny little glitch head? That fragger's Little Joe."

***


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Sorry this update took a whole weekend. I have a hard time posting over the weekends because of work and dial-up internet at home. (Yeah, I live in the boonies.) As always, please read and review! Let me know how you think it's going!

***

Okay, so even Frenzy had to admit that this episode was pretty funny. Especially at the beginning when the two gunmen had wiped out an entire room full of cowboys in a bar. That part had been hilarious, despite the fact that there wasn't any blood or anything. Ironhide had come in after the map on the title screen started burning, so he missed the good part. Now it was all stupid squishies talking, and it wasn't even the cowboys, so Frenzy was starting to get bored. He could feel his tired body slowly winding down. He kept staring at the screen, knowing that if he tried to pay attention long enough he would slip into recharge without even having to think about it. Or at least he would if the Cassetticon could manage to stop letting his processor wander back to his earlier conversation with First Aid. The whole thing was making him feel twitchy, and when he got twitchy he wanted to destroy things, and he'd had to put up with enough slag after the wall punching incident.

_Why did I ask about all that slag? It's not like it matters anyway._ Frenzy drummed his fingers on his uninjured hand against his leg ignoring the sideways glances it earned him from Ironhide. The big fragger wouldn't say anything unless Frenzy talked first. And even then Ravage was more articulate. The red Autobot's vocabulary with the Decepticon was usually just grunts, sighs, and frustrated gestures. Though Frenzy could get a rise out of him if he dissed the dumb cowboy show long enough, Ironhide didn't seem interested in defending any of the other shows Frenzy sometimes watched, never went out of his way to ask him personal questions, and only gave the barest of answers to anything else. But he always waited patiently until Frenzy had slipped off, and there had been a few days when Frenzy had woken up to still find the Autobot there, watching the muted TV in the dim cell. It should have made the Decepticon feel nervous, but it didn't. Instead it made him feel—

"So…" Ironhide started slowly, not taking his eyes off the screen where Hoss and Little Joe were drinking human high-grade in the bar. _Lucky fraggers._ "So doc tells me that ya hurt your hand punchin' the wall."

Frenzy was too surprised to be withdrawn. "Yeah, so?" He answered, than instantly regretted not answering with a sullen silence. The human bartender on the screen was sputtering like a moron. "Well, uh, i-, it,it's kinda warm…"the tiny human squeaked, "But, well, it's, it's not too warm. Maybe little on the chilly side?"

"That's three cells a' mine you've dented up kid." Ironhide said, with a hint of humor in his deep voice. He shot a look at the Mini-Cassette's damaged hand, "An' when you're gonna punch a flat, metal surface ya wanna do it with your thumb curled an the outside so ya don't pinch it."

Frenzy snorted, flexing his damaged hand. It was still sore, and Ironhide was right, the thumb did feel pinched. "You gotta lot of experience punching walls, do ya?"

Ironhide gave a half grin to the TV, "I gotta lot'a experience punching a lotta different things kid. Walls is just one'a em."

"Yeah, well I'm used to packing a bigger wallop than fists. Not fraggin used to having to punch with my hands."

"Well there," the big red Autobot said, "Now you can't say ya didn't learn nothin' from me."

"I'll keep that in mind the next time I'm slaggin' Autobots on the battlefield." Frenzy toyed with the idea of changing the channel, knowing that it would really grind the old mech's gears. The little bartender guy in the show was whispering to his friends now.

"Oh, did you see the way they looked at me?" He said to the sheriff, "Oh gentlemen there was death in them eyes, sudden death."

Ironhide gave a low laugh, "Kid, I been in almost every battle we've had since we woke up on this rock. An I know for a fact that you ain't been in more'an a couple of 'em. It's always that other one, the blue one. Rumble."

"He's purple." Frenzy snapped defensively.

Ironhide waved his hand dismissively. "Either way. Any reason that other punk gets out more than you?"

There were reasons, but there was no slaggin way Frenzy was gonna tell the Autobot. They sat in silence for a while, watching the cowboys get shot at, Frenzy pretending to be about to fall into recharge, even through the sparkling had started moving again, and while it wasn't uncomfortable, it was… distracting. There were good reasons Frenzy wasn't out in fights as much as Rumble, but it had never occurred to him that the Autobots might notice. _Oh, what if they think it's cuz I can't fight?_

"I burn off more energy than Rumble faster, specially in a fight." Frenzy said matter-of-factly, "but also when I'm just outta the box. My systems run hotter than Rumble's. It's what makes me a good fighter."

"But not good enough to replace yer more efficient brother mosta the time?"

Frenzy glared at Ironhide. _Smartaft._

Ironhide grinned at the TV and the Mini-Cassette started considering ripping the energon line out of his chest and rushing over to the big dumb Autobot to try out his new punching technique.

"So what were ya doin' attacking lighthouses?" Ironhide asked, watching Hoss and Little Joe on the TV get threatened by squishies with guns.

Frenzy considered just snapping 'none of your fraggin' business,' but slaggitall, he was _bored._

"It was part of Megatron's latest plan." He lied, trying to wipe the stupid smile off his face. Lying was more his brother's strong suit, but he didn't really care if the stupid Autobot believed him or not.

Ironhide grunted, obviously very skeptical, "Really? That lighthouse strategically important?"

Frenzy nodded, the stupid smile creeping back into the corners of his mouth, "Oh yeah, really important. Destroying that lighthouse would fuck up the squishies little boats, creating chaos, and destruction, and…uh… energon!"

"So Megatron sent one little Cassette, alone, ta destroy it?"

"Hey, little guys can fly in under the radar! He knew that I could handle it!"

Ironhide looked at him incredulously, "Megatron know you were carryin'?"

The Mini-Cassette clammed up like he'd been shot with a null-ray, feeling like he'd been tricked, even though he'd been the one trying to lie. Swallowing down any number of wonderful obscenities that might have given him away he pretended to be both suddenly tired and suddenly very interested in what was going on in the show, though he knew that the Autobot wouldn't believe it. Some little femme squishy was reciting poetry to Hoss and Little Joe, who were in jail for some reason that Frenzy hadn't been paying attention for. _Dumb fraggers, I know what that's like… _he thought.

"Didja really like it?" the ugly, squishy woman asked when she'd finished her poem.

"I thought it was prime, just prime." Hoss answered enthusiastically through the bars. Ironhide snorted.

Frenzy tried to pay attention enough to slip into recharge, and Primus knows that the stupid squishies talking to each other was boring enough to have put anyone to sleep, but his conversation with First Aid kept running together with the conversation he'd had with his brother over two weeks ago, and he kept feeling his fists on Ironhide's leg as he'd pounded into it and Ironhide's hand on his wrist as it guided his hand down to find his sparkling's pulse. _Two weeks…and they ain't come for you yet._

Someone came and broke Hoss and Little Joe out of jail, and Frenzy flipped off the television in frustration. _Damn stupid, lucky, shaft-shiners!_

"Ya really should be trying ta sleep kid." Ironhide said softly. The Decepticon merely moved his arm over so he was flipping off the big mech across the cell. The Autobot crossed his arms, unamused but unmoved, and went back to watching the TV. Frenzy went back to trying to ignore his own thoughts, but damn it; there were so many of them. Ironhide kept giving the Mini-Cassette sideways glances, able to tell something was up but unsure what he could do about it.

"It must really torque your torsion bars," Frenzy finally started, his voice hazy with exhaustion, "havin' ta watch me like this."

Ironhide unfolded his arms and leaned in, "What makes you think I _have_ to watch you?"

Frenzy didn't have an answer, so he drummed his fingers slowly on his chest, "Must really tick you off that Optimus offered to let me stay, huh?" he asked, his tired voice thick with accusation.

The old, red, Autobot shook his head, "Kid, why in the name of Vector Sigma da'ya think that would tick me off?"

The Mini-Cassette watched the screen, too tired to come up with an answer. Some tiny squishy kid had come through Hoss and Little Joe's window. Frenzy rubbed at where the sparkling was moving, the faint, shifting feeling kicking up all kinds of emotions that he didn't have the energy to destroy things for. Ironhide watched him from the corner of his optics, but the Decepticon didn't notice.

On the TV Hoss and Little Joe were talking to the tiny squishy kid.

"Just why are we supposed to kill Ans Hadfield?" Little Joe asked.

"He's the fastest gun around here ain't he," the little pug-nosed thing squeaked back. "None of us McFaddens can hold a candle to 'im. We gotta get rid of him before we can kill the rest of the Hadfields."

"Well…ha..how come you gotta kill all them Hadfields?" Hoss wondered.

"Don't you fellas know anything? It's a feud!" The short human cried. "He's kinda dumb aint he?" He asked Little Joe.

Ironhide suddenly sighed. "Frenzy listen," he started, " I been known ta keep grudges sometimes. But I wouldn't be fighting the right kinda war fer the right reasons if we didn't leave it open for people ta switch sides."

That hit Frenzy like the blast from a fusion cannon. He sat up. "I ain't switching sides!" he yelled.

Ironhide stood up. "They ain't come fer ya kid!" He said firmly, gesturing around the bare orange cell. "What the slag do ya think you're gonna do?"

"Fuck you!" Frenzy shouted, ignoring how sitting up too fast had made him dizzy.

"Hate to break it to you kid, but that ain't an option." Ironhide cracked sharply. "You're not really my type."

"Oh! And who is?" Frenzy shouted back after he got over his shock at the Autobot's retort. He was willing himself to get angrier, but his body was not cooperating, "That dumb, blocky doc? Ratchet? Or maybe the big boss slagger himself? You like 'em tall, red, and resurrectable?"

Ironhide snorted, then buried his face in his hand trying to stifle his sudden laughter.

The Decepticon glared. The Autobot laughed.

"Kid…kid… You are hopeless, kid."

Frenzy's anger collapsed leaving only annoyance, frustration, exhaustion and nausea in its wake. He lay back on the berth making a show of ignoring everything in the room. Including the big dumb Security 'Bot still choking on his guffaws. The Autobot managed to find his seat again.

"Heh, naw kid, my type is a little more, uh, feminine. And blue. And Autobot. And taller." Ironhide smiled wistfully to himself. "Not that I don't appreciate the offer." He added with a snicker. He gave the Cassetticon a kindly nod, as his face became slightly more serious.

"Now you'll have plenty of time ta think on our offer later. At least five weeks First Aid says. And you know ya gotta think on it, cuz this all ain't just goin' away. But right now you gotta get ta recharging."

Frenzy groaned and rubbed at his optic band with is damaged hand. "This place is a fraggin hellhole." He mumbled.

"I know kid, I know, medical care, energon an television. It's a regular Autobot torture chamber. Why we even gave ya a remote! How could we be so monstrous?"

Frenzy crossed his arms over his chest, carefully, and glowered at the television. He was so absorbed by his anger that he didn't even notice when he'd slipped off into recharge. It only took him a few minutes.

Ironhide settled in to watch the rest of the episode, even though he'd seen it a few times before. Suddenly he leaned forward and rubbed his optics. _First Aid and Optimus were right_, he thought, _there is something more going on here than he's tellin' us._

He gave the resting Decepticon a long, grim stare. _Dammit all kid. What are you hidin'? Ain't nobody gonna hurt ya._ The Autobot felt his hands ball up into fists, his thumbs on the outside. _Not as long as you're like that. Not as long as I'm here._

On the TV Hoss ran down the steps of the saloon and grabbed the shoulders of the tiny squishy boy. "Hey..uh..Hey! Come here boy! Where you goin' with that rifle?"

"I'm gonna kill me some Hadfields!" The little boy growled, before marching away.

Hoss walked slowly up to his brother. "Yep, even the kids are thinkin' like that." He said looking down at his feet.

"Yeah, seems like a shame dosen' it." Little Joe replied thoughtfully as he squinted at the half built barricade in the street.

"Yep." Hoss paused before glancing up at his younger brother, "Well, let's go." He muttered reluctantly.

Little Joe gave Hoss a knowing look, "Come on, who you jokin'?"

Hoss paused, then nodded. "That's what I like about us as a family Little Joe. Pa always taught us ta never do nothing the other's'd be ashamed of. I'd like to keep it that way."

Ironhide pushed the mute on the TV, not wanting to risk the next part waking the kid up.

***

_What am I doin'?_ Frenzy stared at the orange wall, not even able to summon up the effort to glare at it. The sparkling's kicking had woke him up early again, and the Cassetticon had a sinking suspicion that the little fragger was planning on making a habit of it.

_What the hell am I doin'?_ He asked himself again. He tried to reply with _Idon'tcareIdon'tcare…_ but every time his mind started forming the words he heard Ironhide's voice in his head again. _'this ain't all just going away.'_

He stared at his injured hand. _'medical care, energon, and television. It's a regular Autobot torture chamber.'_ The Decepticon wasn't dumb, he knew that part of the reason he'd been looked after so well was because the Autobots were self-righteous softies that wouldn't dream of treating a carrying mechanism with anything less than utmost care for fear of feeling 'barbaric.' That was part of the reason he couldn't let them terminate. The damn fraggers would pity his poor little bastard Decepticon spawn as they took it offline. They would pity it to death. And it deserved a more dignified end than that.

At least…that's what he'd told himself two weeks ago, without really telling himself with _words_, and every day since then he'd repeated it. But now. What would he do? Two weeks and they hadn't come for him. And the damn little-fragger was _kicking_.

_Chances of survival are seventy- five to eighty- five percent._ Frenzy tapped at his chest nervously, trying to ignore the warm lighting feeling that filled him when he just thought of his sparkling moving inside him. _Carry for another five to six weeks._

_Smaller than I would like to see._ Why had those words struck him with fear? It didn't matter. Frenzy rubbed his optic band, being tired made him feel sick. _What the frag are you gonna do with a sparkling?_ Rumble's voice was the voice of reason, which wasn't really that comforting. _Thinka how bad you feel now. I promise you, going through it would be like, ten million times worse. And ain't nobody gonna want it but you._

_Why did I even ask about all that slag? _Frenzy asked himself for the hundredth time. _Why did I want to know?_

The sparkling moved again and Frenzy covered his face with his hands and groaned. More than anything in the galaxy he missed Rumble right now. Rumble would tell him what to do. Frenzy might not like what Rumble would tell him to do, but at least he wouldn't have to think about it.

He wished he could just, for even a few minutes, curl up in cassette-mode in the dark subspace of Soundwave's chest, feeling his brothers folded up next to him in the dark, listening to the dark thrum of Soundwave's spark. Then he would be able to shut down completely, not feel anything, not know anything, and not have to make any sort of decisions on what he wanted.

_Optimus Prime has said that he is willing to let you and your sparkling stay. _First Aid had said. _Indefinitely, and with full protection. And if you'll talk to me about…about what happened before we captured you._ Frenzy sighed, and for one split second he let himself consider what it might possibly be like if he stayed. What it would be like to have his sparkling. What it would be like to betray Soundwave and his brothers for a sawed of little scrap that nobody was ever gonna want anyway. He tapped gently against his chest.

And was echoed by a tapping in the vent above him. Frenzy peered up into the darkness behind the solid reinforced grate, and saw two diamond-shaped yellow lights peering down on him. Frenzy heard the tapping again. Faint, but definite.

He leaned back on his berth, still tapping against his chest, but differently. Then he smiled to himself.

_They __**are**__ coming for me._

_***_

A/N: The Bonanza episode Ironhide and Frenzy were watching was Episode 19, Season 1, The Gunmen, written by Carey Wilber and first aired January 23, 1960. I love Bonanza.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Sorry it took a whole week to get this up. School is starting to kick my trash. I've got two papers due before Dec 6 so I'm not guaranteeing any more updates until after that time. As much as I would like it to be otherwise, school is supposed to take precedent over trashy Transformer fanfiction. Here's an extra long update! As always, reviews are appreciated.

***

"Fraggitall! Over three weeks and you haven't gotten one scrap of useful information from the little slagger!" Ratchet cried, savoring the excuse to blow off some steam and prod at First Aid a little. "Now hand me that arc-welder!"

The patient on the table shifted his gaze to the mech standing at his other side, who was carefully removing a section of crumpled, battle-scarred plating. The red and white Protectobot put the sheet of metal on the table next to him, shaking his head.

"Your hand _becomes_ an arc-welder Ratchet, what do you need mine for?" First Aid asked with his eternal calm. The patient narrowed his optics as the doctor's mouthplate stopped moving before turning his head back to the medic on his other side.

"Mine's overheated right now." Ratchet snapped with a smile. "And you're changing the subject."

First Aid passed his welder over the prone Autobot's opened chest to his colleague. "I'm not changing the subject. It's true I've gotten less information from Frenzy than I had expected to at this point. But keep in mind that he's only been awake for one twelfth of the time. Altogether he's only been online for about a day's time since I first told him about Optimus' offer." He tapped his faceplates. "Do you have the five-micron snips?" he asked.

The patient watched Ratchet's faceplates very carefully, as he handed the tool over. "How has he been reacting to the offer?" the medic asked over the hiss of the arc-welder.

First Aid adjusted the overhead light to get a better look at what he was doing. "He hasn't really talked about it, and I wouldn't really expect him to. It's got to be a hard thing to adjust to, getting used to the idea of switching sides. Since the sparkling started moving he's taken a much greater interest in knowing what's going on as far as its condition is concerned. He has seemed more…upbeat…ever since I told him though. Which is amazing considering how he must be feeling physically."

Ratchet grunted as he adjusted the setting on First Aid's welder to make it hotter. Running it cooler may keep it from overheating and wearing out, but it was so fraggin' slow. First Aid pretended not to notice. "How's he holding up? In your opinion I mean…Slag, it's been so long since I've worked in sparking, I hardly remember what's normal anymore."

"His body's starting to show the strain." First Aid replied, not taking his optics from his work, "It's the usual problems that crop up after the half-way point, only exacerbated: discomfort, nausea, some pain in the systems the protoform capsule is pressing against. But it's doubly unlucky that his systems seem to run hot and dirty normally. He's burning through everything faster than we can replace it: oil, energon, hydraulic fluids, and especially those nanites. I've never seen a mech or femme produce so many nanites, and then burn through them so fast. Perceptor's taken a huge interest, and of course, he has his theories."

Ratchet sighed behind his smirk, "And what do you think of them?" The patient on the table made a face as the medic gently smoothed the cooling weld, and pulled out some pliers to fix a bent hydraulic.

"I'm more concerned with Frenzy's condition than I am the reasons surrounding it. Perceptor's theories may be interesting, but they haven't led to anything that I can put into practice to help." First Aid lifted out the damaged portion of the auxiliary fuel tank that he'd just snipped away, and got started preparing a patch over the clean square hole he'd cut. "I'm most concerned about Frenzy's cosmotron. If it starts to give out we'll need to deliver right away."

Ratchet nodded his head. "Well hey, it's only about one more week until the sparkling's viable right? It's two months in a week."

First Aid shook his head, serenely serious. "If we were dealing with a regular-sized mech or femme two months should be plenty of time for the sparkling to mature. The Minibots usually go two and a half months, since their systems have to work harder. I delivered from a few of –these- back on Cybertron." He said tapping on his patient's chest. The Autobot on the table looked at him quizzically. "But if Frenzy were to deliver in three weeks his sparkling should be twice the size that it is now, and its systems should be much more mature. If we only had the sparkling to consider I would say it would be best for it to be carried for another five weeks, at least." The doctor leaned in close to inspect his finished patch before nodding to his colleague. "Frenzy's stable now, and things are going about as well as I could expect. But it could all go downhill very fast."

Ratchet snorted as he closed up the last few panels on their patient, "And you're supposed to be the optimistic one…" he cracked. "You about done?"

First Aid gave the patch one last look-over before his closed up the panel he'd been working through. The damaged panel would be repaired, but their patient was okay to walk around the base without it, as long as he was careful. "Yes, I'm all finished. Anything else you want to ask before we turn his audio receptors back on?"

"You think the kid can handle this?"

First Aid tapped his faceplates. "I've no doubt that if he really wants it Frenzy will come out of this with a sparkling." He gave a light chuckle and shook his head, "But whether or not he'll be able to handle _that _is anyone's guess. If he stays, Ratchet, that kid is gonna need a lot of help."

"To bad we don't have some bleeding-heart doctor to hover like a traffic 'copter over them both." Ratchet grinned. Then reached behind the yellow head of their patient and flipped his audio receptors back on. "Heya Bumblebee, how're you feeling?" He asked.

The little, yellow Minibot shot the two medics a thumbs-up. "Feelin' just great doc! And other doc! Thanks you guys."

"Hey, that's what we're here for." First Aid said patting Bumblebee gently on the back. "Now you can move around base until we get this plate finished, but be careful."

The Autobot Scout started moving eagerly to the door of the medbay, "Sure thing First Aid!"

"And next time you're fighting Decepticons, Bumblebee, try not to jump in _front_ of the laser blasts." Ratchet called after him. The yellow bug waved them goodbye, distracted.

Bumblebee strolled down the halls of headquarters, lost in thought and looking for someone, anyone, to ask about what he'd read from Ratchet's lips while his audio receptors had been turned off_. Who's having a sparkling around here?_ Bumblebee wondered, _and why is this the first I've heard about it?_ Catching sight of Bluestreak, the little car hurried to catch up with him. _If anyone around here knows what's going on, it's Bluestreak._

***

As the wall of the cell swung open Optimus Prime resisted the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose. He was frustrated. Sure, he'd anticipated this. But he'd started to hope that he would be given the opportunity to present all the facts to the Autobots clearly and at a carefully chosen time; instead of fighting the rumors that had seemed to spread like an oil spill, quickly touching everyone and with no clear indication of who had said what, when.

Somehow Bluestreak and Bumblebee had gotten wind of something, and like the friendly, curious mechs they were they'd asked everyone else about it. Facts came together, high-grade loosened lips, and soon the whole story, and then some, was buzzing around base. It couldn't have been Tracks who'd let it slip first, he may not be able to keep quiet about his own appearance, but he did know how to keep official secrets; at least until everyone around him knew the secret, and knew it wrong. And the corvette hadn't known Frenzy was carrying. Prime strongly suspected that someone on the medical staff was to blame, but he really wasn't in the mood for a witch hunt. After all, with both First Aid and Ironhide indicating a strong possibility of the Cassetticon staying with them, if not switching sides outright, it was about time the rest of the Autobots were told. Not that their opinions would have any bearing on Optimus' decision. But they were going to have to live with it. Him. Them.

Optimus suddenly regretted his decision to talk to Frenzy from behind the bars. It seemed too cold. After all Frenzy shouldn't feel like he was some kind of zoo animal just because he was a prisoner. However, the way the Cassetticon slowly sat up on his berth, staring at him with irritated curiosity, let Optimus know that closing the wall again and heading into the cell would only make the situation more awkward. _I should have been down to see him before this… _Prime thought. _I should have been checking up on him._ But he'd been busy. Primus, he was always busy. Running a two-front war against a foe that cannot be attacked directly without incurring precious civilian casualties, dealing with the complex machinations of human governments--the leader of the Autobots had little time to sit down next to the young, carrying mech, and tell him how much he'd been weighing on Prime's mind.

Besides, according to First Aid and Ratchet, Ironhide was doing an admirable job looking out for the Cassette in is free time. He'd had lots of free time lately. Optimus had made sure of it.

"Frenzy," Optimus said, carefully. "How're you feeling?"

The Decepticon leaned his back against the wall, looking exhausted. "I swear to the Pit and Primus that if one more fraggin' Autobot asks me how I'm feeling I'm gonna flip a freakin' gasket," he said, slow and even. "How the frag do you think I'm feelin'?"

"I'm sure I wouldn't know." Optimus answered.

"Yeah, well ya wouldn't know any better if I told ya."

"Fair enough," Optimus kept his voice neutral. "I was just wondering if there was anything I could do to make you more comfortable. First Aid tells me that you're in for another four or five weeks."

Frenzy snorted, "Well he's the expert, isn't he?" he snapped sarcastically as he flipped on the TV and started channel surfing. "I would be more comfortable if I wasn't stuck in a boring, orange box, surrounded by cable-yanking Autobots who are constantly comin' in here to tell me slag I already know. But since THAT isn't gonna happen anytime soon…" he trailed off, staring at the TV.

"As long as First Aid okays it, I would be willing to grant you some supervised time outside your cell." Optimus offered, "First Aid or Ironhide could take you around, let you meet some of the other Autobots."

The Cassetticon perked up, "The other slaggers know now? Ironhide said mosta the grunts didn't know."

Optimus nodded, "We tried to keep it on a need-to-know basis, it's true. But you must know how hard it is to keep things secret on base. Once it got out, there was no sense hiding it anymore."

"It was that lube-sucking microscope wasn't it? That slagger will not stop talking for anything!"

"We don't know who it was. And it doesn't really matter. What matters is that they know, and many of them have expressed an interest in meeting with you."

"I'll fraggin' bet they have!" Frenzy sneered. "Probably got some scores to settle."

Prime shook his head. "No Frenzy, they just want to talk to you. They're curious, not vengeful. Any sign of confrontation, on your part too, and whoever is supervising you will take you back to your cell."

Frenzy leaned forward, to get a better look at the tall mech on the other side of the bars. "You're serious?"

The Autobot Leader raised a finger, "Yes. The only condition I have is that you must first talk to First Aid, Ironhide, Ratchet or myself about what…"he paused getting a grip on his anger before it could rise, "what happened before. Why you were attacking the lighthouse, why you were alone, among…other…things." Frenzy had lain back down on his berth as Optimus started listing the questions. He rolled over and faced the wall. The dents were still there.

Prime waited, for what seemed like a long time to him. Then he checked his internal chronometer, noting that he had a meeting with Prowl and Silverbolt soon. _Why aren't there more breems in a cycle? _he thought. "Frenzy, why don't you talk to us?" he asked, covering up his frustration with compassion. "We're not going to hurt you."

"Just let me go." The figure on the berth moaned into the wall.

"We're not doing that either. Not until you talk to us." Optimus replied firmly.

"You can't keep me here forever." Frenzy retorted, without moving.

"It's a very long time until we get to forever, Frenzy."

Another long pause as Optimus ticked down the seconds he had remaining until his meeting. Finally he closed the wall back up and walked away. _Close to convincing him, First Aid? Really? I'm not convinced._ He rubbed his optics, pushing the situation out of his processor as best he could. He couldn't let it affect his meeting with Silverbolt and Prowl. _It seems like we're just going in circles…_ he thought before he banished it completely from his mind, for the moment at least.

***

Frenzy rolled over and glared up at the grate. There was a flicker across his face, and then he glared even harder, looking at the two yellow optics that had been staring at him for the past couple seconds. _It's about fraggin time! Eleven days; what the slag is wrong with them? I was starting to freak out again. I mean damn, eleven days!_ Eleven days of feeling more and more exhausted and uncomfortable every breem. Eleven days of avoiding questions and steering conversations to safe topics so he wouldn't make 'em suspicious. Eleven days of feeling the little slagger kicking him harder, and then harder. Eleven days of that stupid cowboy crap. _Those strut-shiners have got some serious explainin to do!_

There was a faint scratching noise, and a low, deep, hum that only a Cassetticon could have heard thrummed through the cell. A jamming frequency? Frenzy peered into the corners of the room. He hadn't noticed any cameras, but that didn't mean there weren't any. And Beaky knew how to jam a camera so its own creator wouldn't know it was reading false.

A small, purple, rectangle was pushed through the holes in the grate, and Frenzy grinned as the rectangle grew, and transformed as it fell. _Stupid fraggers, made the hole perfect Cassetticon size. _The red and black Decepticon stood up as his brother landed.

"'Bout time you fraggers got here! Dammit Rumble I was--"

Rumble charged over to him, his visor flashing with anger. Frenzy tried to back away but was blocked by the berth, so he sat back down. The purple Decepticon grabbed his shoulders and squeezed them in his grip until Frenzy was sure he was denting his plating.

"Who the FRAG do you think you are?" he hissed.

"Bro, I—"

"Don't you 'bro' me you glitching, little lube-stain! Do you know the slag I had to go through cuz you had to run off and deal with your goddamn emotions?" He shook his brother slightly. "Dammit Frenzy do you know what I had to do? How much whining and wheedling and bitching it took ta get Soundie to let me come in here and talk some sense into ya?"

"S… S…Soundwave?"

Rumble dropped Frenzy's shoulders and started wagging a finger violently right under his visor. "That's right aft-wipe, Soundwave was all ready to write you off! Figured if you wanted to get back to us, ya would fraggin' have done it already. You know the rules: keep up or keep inside. Get back however you can, cuz ain't nobody coming for ya!"

Frenzy was too flustered to process any of that, and kept glancing up at Laserbeak in the grate. "But…"

"But NOTHING!" Rumble hissed again. I seemed like it was taking a supreme effort to keep from yelling. "Soundie sent Buzzy and Beaky out to look for you the first couple days, sure. Cuz he's that kinda guy. But when Megatron asked where Laserbeak was after he wasn't back in time for a fight Soundwave had to wait until things quieted down to start looking again, and he wasn't really in the mood to look to long and hard by that point. Dammit Frenzy, I had to tell him everything and then some! I don't think I've ever lied so hard in my life! And nobody had any fraggin idea where the hell you were!"

Rumble was pacing back and forth now, glancing up at the Cassette in the grate again. "Right Beaky? Pit, it wasn't until we checked the local news that we saw about that stupid squishy lighthouse."

He stared at his brother in disbelief. "A lighthouse? Really? You _are_ as fraggin dumb as you look. I mean, you didn't even make basic cable on that one! If you're gonna throw a tantrum, go someplace easier to slam into and with morea those earth-bugs to squish. Destroying public property without casualties doesn't get you shit for publicity these days."

"So…" Frenzy started tentatively.

"I'm not fraggin' done yet! Ya gotta hear the whole fuckin' story so you can know just exactly how much of a stupid little lube-sucking, aftwipining, glitch-head you've been. I mean, shit Frenzy, you got a Betamax for a brain? I could slaggin' download your whole stupid mind onto a defective floppy disk and have some crippled, organic meatbag rip it up with his bare hands, couldn't I?!" Rumble smiled humorlessly, allowing himself to enjoy a little bit his revenge.

"So after Beaky had FINALLY tracked you down, what does he fraggin record?" Rumble gestured frantically around the room "This shit! What the hell is all this shit?" his arms transformed to drivers as he talked, and Frenzy became terrified that he would smash into the things he was railing against and give them away. Ironhide was never very far these days. "Medical monitors? Energon lines? Weird fraggin locked container things!" He swung his driver threateningly at each one. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"I…uh…" The red and black Cassetticon was suddenly very embarrassed as he tried to avoid looking around the cell that seemed filled with medical equipment. _Primus, I'm such a slaggin moron…_ He couldn't finish his thought out-loud though, since Rumble was suddenly right in his face, his visor inches from his own.

His brothers voice was a hiss of choked anger, and beneath it something else. "What the _hell_ are you doin' Frenzy?" Something about he way he asked it…Frenzy knew his brother already had most of the answer.

"I…I thought you guys would be coming for me sooner…" Frenzy mumbled, though he finally was feeling his anger start to stir. It had taken long enough in his opinion. _Rumble oughtta understand…_

"So?" The question was almost a threat.

"So, I couldn't fraggin' let _them_ do it." Frenzy willed some of his anger to come out in his voice. "And eventually it was that or this. The goddamn cable-tuggers, wouldn't let me go and wouldn't give me any other choice."

"You're _still_ sparked up, aren't you?" Rumble accused, sneering.

Now Frenzy was _really_ mad. It was refreshing after eleven days of persistent, boring, hope. "I thought that you, you at least, would be comin' for me sooner!" He spat. "I mean, yeah, the rest of the slaggers'll leave us behind, but we're fraggin' brothers. We're fraggin' Cassettes! We're supposed to have each other's backs!"

Rumble poked him, hard, in the chest, and Frenzy had to choke down a groan. "I slaggin' came for you as soon as I could, you little spark-sucker! I don't know why now. Cuz Pit knows you don't deserve it. I mean, who the slag do you think you are? You think you're better than the rest of us? Huh? You think your purge don't corrode plating? Why the hell do you think you can run off and have a slaggin' hissy fit, get captured, and then lie around goddamn Autobot Headquarters and expect us to come looking for you? If you'd just had 'em do it you could have escaped by now you glitch-head! " He poked him in the chest again, harder, and this time Frenzy let out a strangled moan and tried to slap his brother's hand away. _Primus, it HURT._ "That's what you fraggin' should have done! Get back however you can! Remember!"

"Is that what YOU would have done?" Frenzy snarled, too weak to push Rumble's hand completely away, but too stubborn to stop trying. Then he froze. Then Rumble froze. And something between them moved, again.

Rumble stared down at Frenzy's chest and his finger on it, and for a second the rest of his fingertips found their way to the warm plating. When the sparkling kicked again Frenzy saw his brother's visor flash before he pulled his hand away quickly like the plating had suddenly become acid.

"Pit…" he muttered.

"What would you have done, huh Rumble? If it were you and yours? Would _you_ let the Autobots take your sparkling off-line? You know what they're like…"

Rumble stared at Frenzy's chest for a while, his face unreadable, before sighing loudly; letting everyone know that wherever the conversation had been going, the subject was now changed. "Well bro, how the hell do _you_ see yourself getting out of this? We can't get you out through the grate, and Beaky says that that's the only way outta this cell other than the halls. And I don't know if he can jam that many sensors at once." There was a quiet metallic squawk from the ceiling, Rumble waved it off, "Yeah, yeah, I know YOU think you can…"

"Is there any way you can get the walls open, Laserbeak?" Frenzy asked, a faint caw answered in the negative.

Rumble was pacing back and forth now, realizing he'd eaten up too much of his time browbeating his brother. "Is there anyway those Autoboobs would let you outta here? Like if you faked sick or something?"

"_Faked _sick?" Frenzy asked incredulously, gesturing to the monitors. Rumble flipped him the bird.

"Well, is there any fraggin' way you ever get out of this stupid orange box?"

Frenzy drummed his fingers on his leg nervously, "They told me that if I talked to one of their fraggin docbots about stuff. They would let me around base supervised, an if I can get the dumb slaggers to trust me then I might get some time unsupervised."

"What kinda stuff?" Rumble asked guardedly.

Frenzy sneered. "What kinda stuff you think? They're fraggin' Autobots."

The purple Decepticon shook his head in disgust. "But they wouldn't want any, like, secret info?"

"Naw…they're suckers. Told me that I could…" Frenzy trailed off. And it was fortunate that Laserbeak started cawing softly to give him a good excuse.

"Someone's coming." Rumble whispered.

Checking his internal chronometer Frenzy suddenly swore, "It's the fraggin cowboy crap!" He hissed as he lay back down on the berth and started frantically changing the channels.

"What the hell?"

Frenzy pointed to the grate. "Get!" he shushed. "Go tell Soundwave whatever the slag you need too. And ask him what _he_ wants me to do."

Rumble nodded and fired his thrusters, transforming as he flew through the tiny hole in the grate. Frenzy managed to find the right channel just as the wall started to open. Ironhide came in, carrying a cube of high-grade. He'd taken to drinking a little while they watched the show. Just because he knew it torque the kid's crankcase a little, and made him think about exactly why he couldn't have any.

"Heya kid. An I ain't gonna ask it cuz Prime already tol' me that yer sicka hearin it." He took his seat in and kicked back a little. "An' no, you can't have any." He rumbled with a half-grin as he raised his high-grade.

Frenzy half grinned back, and since he was trying so very hard to be nonchalant he flipped him the bird.

Ironhide sighed and shook his head, "So what's this episode, ya know?"

Frenzy shrugged, "They ain't burned the slaggin' map yet. How the hell am I supposed to know?"

The opening teaser started, and Ironhide waved him down. "Well shut yer synthesizer then! Let's see if I've got this one guessed before we get to the titles."

***


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: Finally back after a long hiatus! Only one more week of the term left, and then I'm on break! Thanks everyone for waiting. Hope you enjoy.

And yeah, I don't go messing around with canon romances. So, sorry all you Oppy/IH shippers out there, both the boyez is already taken. The only slash pairing I completely can completely endorse is Huffer/Gears.

***

Forty-two energon cubes, nineteen energon lines, ten nanite injections, four Bonanza episodes, and nearly five days later and Frenzy had gotten_ very_ good at faking being nearly asleep.

Ironhide checked his internal chronometer as he surfed through the channels on the muted television. There was never anything good on this time of day. While Frenzy had been still and soundless for the last five or six hours, starting almost as soon as Ironhide had entered, the monitors on the wall were pretty clear that he wasn't actually recharging. But Ironhide was loath to do anything different, not knowing if he would be unsettling the kid when he was right on the verge of slipping off. _I'll give it another half an hour_, he decided, for the seventh or eighth time. It had been going on like this for a few days; the kid had been faking sleeping more, and recharging less.

First Aid was guessing the trouble recharging was due to increased discomfort. It was starting to concern the medical staff. Frenzy was usually in the yellow, and his energy levels would occasionally dip without warning. So, there was someone in his cell almost all the time now. Ratchet, First Aid, Hoist; but mainly Ironhide. _It's not like I have anything better to do, _the Security Officer mused.Decepticon activity had once again quieted down, and the cells that the prisoner had damaged over five weeks ago were pretty much repaired. _Five weeks down, and if Aid and Ratch are _right_, at least three more weeks to go._

Ironhide gave Frenzy a nervous sideways glance, _Ya realize that kid? Three weeks and you're gonna have a sparkling on your hands._ The Decepticon obviously wasn't worrying himself too much about it, which left it up to the Security Officer to feel the panic starting to creep in. _I don't know nothin' bout raisin' no sparklings. And the kid sure as slag doesn't either._

The old Autobot had tried to share his concerns with Ratchet, hoping that the medic would pass the point on to the doc, but he didn't know if it had sunk in. Which is why he'd sent a message out late last night. Long distance, deep space transmission. He needed advice from a different, rarer perspective. Stretching as quietly as he could, Ironhide tried to realign his cranial suspension which tended to wanna click out of place. Recharging sitting-up with a war-starved Decepticion across the room was ranking his whole alignment. _Wonder if I've gotten a reply yet?_

There was a soft tapping outside the cell, and Ironhide opened the wall and exited as quietly as he could.

First Aid was standing in the brig's hall, with his container in hand, looking as eager and calm as usual. Ironhide shook his head before the doctor could even ask the question. "Kid didn't get a volt of recharge. Same as usual."

Looking through previous readings on the monitor in the hall First Aid nodded, "Yes, but is he close to drifting off?"

"Slag, I don' know."

"Well, I'll give him another hour or so before I go in then."

Frenzy would have flipped off the wall after Ironhide shut it, but his arm felt like it was full of sand. He was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, but most of all he was absolutely fed up with playing the waiting game. _What was taking them so long?_

He wanted instructions, and he wanted them NOW. Because sitting in the same orange room with the same fraggin Autobots who asked him the same sort of questions over and over and over again, but not being able to do or say anything different because he didn't have instructions, was driving him crazy. And not the fun kind of crazy where he got to destroy things while the little squishy humans shrieked in terror. The horrible kind of crazy where he was too tired, uncomfortable, and bored to even sleep, so all he had to do was think the same few thoughts over and over again because he needed to know what he was supposed to be thinking before he let himself think about just anything.

The intense effort of not talking about the wrong things, and not thinking about the wrong things, had quickly exhausted Frenzy. So now he was focused only on not talking and not thinking, which required a little less effort, but still kept him too tense to really sleep.

And the little, pump-licker dancing around in his chest kicking its little metal feet against his cosmotron all day long didn't help either. But since his conversation with Rumble, Frenzy had mostly avoided thinking about _that_. At least, he'd avoided thinking about not thinking about it.

The only think keeping him going was the knowledge that someday, somehow, he would finally be outta this box and feeling good enough to get really good and mad. And then, oh then, he would destroy something. What exactly he would destroy changed depending on his moods, but right now he wanted to rampage through a hospital, and scream at the screaming squishies until he'd screamed himself dry. Until he'd screamed himself silly. And then things would explode. Frenzy smiled to himself.

But there was something wrong, something he couldn't quite put his finger on. He booted up his optic sensors and had a look around his cell. _Slaggin' orange walls, slaggin' orange floors, slaggin' orange ceiling—_Frenzy froze at the two little lights peering down from the grate in the ceiling. As the low hum of a jamming frequency thrummed through the cell Frenzy flipped the bird at the bird on the other side of the grate and prepared to bring most of his systems completely online. He was about halfway there when he saw the small purple cassette tape that was his brother fall through the hole.

As Rumble transformed Frenzy slowly sat up, resigning himself to another browbeating. _Anything is better than another day of faking recharge. _He was shocked to see a smile break out on the purple cassette's face as he landed.

Rumble rubbed his hands together gleefully as he made his way to the berth. "Sorry it took me so long to get back to ya bro!" His voice was eager, if quiet, "But it took Megs and Soundie forever to decide."

"Me..Me…M"

Rumble nodded, "That's right bro! Hell when I told Soundwave that you nearly had the Autobots eating out of the palm of your hand, he couldn't wait to tell Megatron! They fraggin' thought that the Holocaust had come early, like bulls in a china shop, or kids in a candy shop, or however the frag that stupid meatbag stuff goes."

Frenzy sat on the berth stunned, not sure what to process, so he just nodded numbly. "So…uh… they weren't pissed?"

"Pissed! Are you kidding? They got a mech on the inside! They were practically bursting at the seams with ideas of horrible, wonderful things for you to do in here!" Rumble waved his arms around the room enthusiastically. "Oh man bro, you fraggin owe me big time though for putting the idea in their heads. Pit, I lied my ball-bearings off…tol' em that you'd been putting of having the 'Bots…uh…take care of business…because you slaggin' saw the opportunity first. I mean, the suckers are so blinded by the fact that you're playing the whole 'damn-cell in distress' you could walk right up and plug the big fragger himself."

Frenzy drummed his fingers against his leg, too tired and unsettled for some reason, to get as excited as the other Decepticon. "You…ah….you told Megatron? And Soundwave? What did they say? Who else knows?"

Rumble only shrugged, "Hell if I know, I mean, I just tol' Soundie, and then he spent the next few days locked in a room with Megatron talking slag over. Then Soundwave gave me the instructions to pass on to you. I ain't talked to the Slag-Maker in, like….frag I don't know... he didn't say nothin' bout you."

Frenzy tried to rub some of the exhaustion away by scratching his head. His whole fraggin processor felt like it was full of glitch mice. He hadn't had a decent recharge in four or five days. "So uhh…" he started sleepily.

"There something wrong with ya bro? You look like frozen slag warmed over in Hell."

Glaring blearily at his brother, Frenzy changed the subject. "So what do they want me to do?" he asked.

"First of all, they tol' me ta tell you ta tell the Autobozo's anything ya want to, unclassified of course, in order to get them to trust ya enough to let you outta the cell. You can lie or tell the the truth bro, Soundwave said it doesn't matter, ya don't know anything too secret anyway."

"The…the truth…?" Frenzy hesitated.

Rumble only nodded, and grinned plastically, "Yup, tell em anything you think might work. That's what Soundwave told me. It doesn't matter about who or what. I mean, they're fraggin Autobots, who cares what they think 'bout any of us anyway?" Rumble snorted. "Remember though bro, you're a horrible liar. If the truth works, hell go with the fraggin' truth."

"Then what?"

"Then you're supposed to get a good feel for the layout of this base. I mean, a really good feel. Exits, entrances, rooms that ya can get into, rooms that ya can't. Especially around that slaggin huge computer a' their's, Telatrain or whatever."

Frenzy shifted on the berth uncomfortably; there was something wrong that he couldn't put his processor on yet. "Uhhuh." he replied.

"An then, lessee. They wanna get either the…frag what was it…oh yeah. You're supposed to locate either the Key to the Plasma Energy Chamber, whatever the frag that is, the plans for Dominator Disks, the Matter Duplicator, or that Immobilizer thingy, I think that dumb scientist of theirs invented both'a those. Or the World Energy Chip."

"Uhhh huh…" Frenzy tried to commit the list to memory.

"Personally I think they really want the Chip the most. I mean, superweapons are great, but Soundwave really emphasized the Chip thing. He said that it was somewhere around the Tell-a-train but they mighta moved it." There was a soft cawing from above the grate. "Shit." Rumble hissed. "I gotta go. Now what are you supposed ta do again?"

Frenzy scratched his side, where it had started to ache the past few days, "Um, supposed to tell em whatever to get them ta trust me. Then scout around, find Key thingy, Disk thingy, Matter thingy, or Immoblilizer thingy, or Chip thingy." He stopped, and felt a stab of uncertainty. "Then what Rumble?"

Rumble rolled his eyes, "Then you're supposed to steal it and run away."

Frenzy started. "Run away?…but… Pit, I can't fly like this."

"Fuuuuuuuuck" the purple Decepticon sighed. "Look, Soundwave said that if you can get 'em to terminate without losing their trust, then do it. And dammit bro, you and I both know that's what you should do. I mean, look at you! You can hardly flip the bird, much less scout around the base. Tell 'em whatever pathetic sob story you want to, and then get em to pull the plug. Okay Frenzy? Sooner that's over the sooner everything goes back to the way it was. Except you will have REALLY done it this time. I mean, slag, you remember the shit we went through to try and steal that World Energy Chip last time? We attacked a Science Show, in JAPAN, to steal a fraggin human robot, to reprogram it, to steal the damn chip. You bring that chip back, you'll be sitting pretty in Megsy's good graces for a pretty fucking long time."

Frenzy nodded very slowly. _Sitting in his good graces, huh?_

Rumble walked over beneath the grate and gave his brother sitting on the berth a long, hard, stare. "And remember bro," he added, "the more they pity you, the more they'll trust you. Who the slag cares what damn Autobot's think?" Then he fired his thrusters and transformed through the grate.

Frenzy lay back on the berth, trying his best to process the conversation but it felt like it was already slipping away, lost in the buzz in his data banks, the tired hissing mist that dulled all his thoughts. _There's something wrong_…he thought to himself…._there's something wrong._ He silently prayed for sleep to come and drag him into a deeper oblivion.

***

Ironhide didn't have a computer terminal in his quarters, even though most of the other Autobot's, heck even Huffer, had gotten one hooked up by now. Ironhide had just never seen the point. The terminal in the security office worked just as well, and he didn't have any kind of messages he really needed to keep private. Not that the messages the Autobots sent over their terminals were really private anyway. Every computer on base was hooked up to Teletraan-1 and anyone with the right security clearance, like say, Red Alert, could read any information from any terminal at any time. Luckily Ironhide had a slightly higher security clearance than Red Alert, and even through there was nothing 'classified' in the message he'd sent the night before, and the message he'd received just now, he couldn't resist encrypting them.

Ironhide tapped at the unmarked lighted buttons in front of the keyboard, bringing up the reply he'd received. He couldn't help but grin to himself a little. _Didn' take 'er too long, now did et?_ The slight grin lingered as he read and reread, even though there wasn't really anything to grin about in the information sent.

"She already got your message?" A low, friendly voice broke Ironhide's concentration. He turned away from the terminal to look at one of the few bots who had a higher security clearance than him.

"Now Optimus," Ironhide drawled back, "Ya know it's not polite ta read other folk's mail."

"I never said I read it Ironhide, I simply noted the destination." Prime replied as he came up next to his friend. "I was curious though. You two aren't exactly pen-pals."

"What's the point'a sendin a message if ya ain't got anythin new ta say?" Ironhide said turning his back completely to the console. " An' in five million years, yah've usually said everythin at least once. You, of all 'Bots, should know that."

"Ever the romantic." Optimus chuckled.

Grinning lopsidedly, Ironhide turned back to the terminal.

"So I take it something new has come up?" Optimus asked diffidently.

Ironhide snorted, "Aww come on Optimus, quit beating around the Morphobots, ya at least have an idea what this is 'bout, an' ya know me well enough to know I hate ya being all clever and slag. So just spill it."

Optimus laughed, "You don't know how refreshing it is to hear that after dealing with human politicians all day long. I only supposed that it had something to do with our prisoner. I know you've had to sit with him a lot over the past month."

Ironhide narrowed his optics, "An' I know you've had somethin' ta do with that." He accused.

Optimus shrugged innocently, "I do want to thank you for that. I've heard that you really have a way with him."

The red van snorted, "Primus knows why, kid knocked me clean on my aft last time we fought."

"They do have a tendency to do that." Prime joked, before taking a step closer to his friend. "I just wondered if you were handling it alright Ironhide. I know it's a strange situation. Maybe even a little uncomfortable…"

Waving him off Ironhide logged out of the terminal. "Yeah, I'm handling it alright."

"Ironhide…" Optimus knew his friend, and knew that a little prodding was often necessary to get to the real truth.

"I'm handlin' it fine, Optimus." Ironhide replied firmly, "It's the kid that I'm worried about, an' I guess I just was a little…ahhh…torn, about worryin' about it so much, okay. I mean, there's stuff he ain't tellin' us, and slag, we're all gonna have a sparklin' on our hands in a few weeks."

Prime smiled and nodded. "I've been concerned about it too, Ironhide."

"An' hey, I guess I jus' wanted ta get a femme's perspective on the whole thing, ya know. And I wanted ta let her know what was goin' on." Ironhide shrugged, and grinned. "Hey, it was somethin' new ta talk 'bout anyway."

Prime smiled, and debated whether to push the topic. "She have some good advice for you?"

"Yeah, a little, she really doesn't, ah…doesn't have much more experience with sparklings than the rest'a us. I think First Aid's got the most know how. But it was good ta know what she thought."

Resting his hand on his friend's shoulder Prime caught Ironhide's optics and held them. "I just wanted to make sure. You know you can always talk to me, any time."

Ironhide snorted but patted the Autobot Leader on the back. "Yeah, any time ya got a free astrosecond ya mean." He returned his friends concerned gaze. "Remember ta take it easy Optimus, you're only one mech, ya don't have'ta carry the universe on your shoulder struts."

Optimus nodded, "I'll try to keep that in mind the next time I'm listening to another Senate Sub-Committee hearing. Thanks old friend."

Ironhide turned back to the console as Optimus headed for the door. Suddenly he swung his head around and called after his oldest friend, "Oh and Chromia tol' me that Elita says 'greetings'" Optimus stopped instantly and turned. Ironhide shot him his lopsided grin. "And she said she misses you too."

Optimus smiled with his optics as he left the security office.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: Heya folks! Managed to get some stuff done over finals week! So if I get C's and D's instead of A's and B's I'll know what to blame! Thanks to everyone who's been so good about reviewing! Y'all are making me blush! The next chapter's been eating a big hole in my soul, so expect it up soon too!

____

There was something wrong. Frenzy rubbed his face blearily with one heavy hand, then let his arm flop back down on the berth with a clang. He shifted a little, slowly, and tried to focus through the thickening haze settling between every circuit link in his whole body. His optic visor powered down on its own, but after a moment he booted it back up again, casting his gaze haphazardly around the cell. _There's somethin' wrong…_

He tried again to gather his thoughts into something more coherent, but he was just too tired and they slipped away, wandering from this to that like a malfunctioning garbage shuttle. Still, somewhere deep in his spark Frenzy was feeling his unease build into something closer to panic. _There's something wrong…_

He tried to focus again. Harder this time. The panic that was creeping up on him nearly hurt, and he just wanted it to go away. And it didn't seem to go away if he ignored it. The reverse, it only made it worse. Nothing in the cell was different; no lights in the grate. There were no sounds in the hall. Everything was quiet and still. _There's something wrong…._

_Everything was quiet and still…_

Realization hit Frenzy like a freezing blast of liquid nitrogen, sending surges like ice racing through his whole body. One shaking hand reached up over his chest, and he tapped gently at the spot right below his spark chamber. There was only stillness. He tapped again, harder this time, but nothing stirred inside him; not even a twitch. And he knew, he knew with absolute certainty, that there was something wrong.

His mind was suddenly hyper-alert, though his body still felt like it was tied down with sandbags. Frenzy tried to think back to the last time he'd felt a kick. He knew it had moved… yesterday? Or at least the last time First Aid did a scan. _But had it moved in the last few hours? Had it moved at all today?_ He couldn't remember, he'd spent so much time over the last few days ignoring every little squirm that he couldn't really say if it had been kicking as much as it had before.

He tapped again, loud enough that he heard the dull clang echo through the cell, but there was still nothing. Frenzy let his hand drop to his side and stared up at the ceiling. _Well…_he thought as he glared at the dull orange panels, _maybe it's better this way. I mean, then the cable-licking Autobot's won't have to do it, and I can still talk to 'em and get away with the chip. It's not like anyone's gonna blame me. It's what Soundwave wants._

He rolled over slightly and faced the wall where the dents from nearly two weeks ago still were. He curled up on himself and felt every ache in his chassis, every ache that had been aching more and more recently, flare up as he moved. He glared at the dents, but didn't have the energy to get angry. _Nobody has to do anything…All I have to do is wait._

Frenzy shut off his optic band. But the darkness only made the stillness inside him louder. He waited, feeling every astrosecond ticking away like a bomb about to go off. Each moment and the panic inside built. Finally he rolled onto his back, and turned his optics on again.

He tapped on his chest, and waited. Then tapped again, and waited. He sat up, which made the whole room spin around him. For a second he thought he might fall onto the floor. Gripping the edge of the berth tightly he stared down at his chest. He tapped again, his hand shaking. Nothing moved.

Frenzy let out a ragged sigh that almost had a moan hiding in it somewhere, and frowned at his chestplates.

"He..hey" his voice sounded strange in his audial receptors, "Hey'a, ya little fragger…uh…" he trailed off and tapped his chest again. "You..ya still with me?" Stillness.

"Damn." Frenzy muttered, one hand on his chest. Then he slapped his chest, hard. "Hey! Aft-wipe! I'm talking ta YOU!" He barked. "Ya ain't done nothin' but fuckin' kick my cosmotron for two weeks, and now ya give me the silent treatment?" His hand curled into a fist and he knocked against his plating, "Helllooooo…anyone home?"

An entire minute passed. Frenzy counted every second.

"Hey..hey…?" Frenzy said softly, still looking down, "Come on now…uh…give me a sign here." He paused for a long moment, begging for something to break the unbearable stillness inside him. "Look." He growled, "If ya fraggin' want me to call the doc, ya gotta…ya…ya gotta fuckin' let me know, okay?" Pause. "Okay?"

Everything was quiet and still.

"Please." He whispered.

The Decepticon Mini-Cassette curled over on the berth, hands crossed over his chest. He turned off his optic band and listened to the raging quiet inside himself. But only for a second. He just couldn't take it anymore. Waiting was never really one of his strengths.

Frenzy, opened his optics, sat up, and stood up, and ignored the way the room instantly started swirling around him. He took the five or six steps to the cell's intercomn in a drunken stagger. Every limb felt like it was die-cast from pure lead. For some reason his head started pounding. He reached way up and slapped at the wall, finally hitting the button on the seventh or eighth try. He only barely heard the buzz.

"This is the Med Bay. What's wrong?" said a voice.

"Fi…Firs….First Aid?" Frenzy stuttered, as he leaned against the wall, the walls had stopped spinning, but only because everything had started going dark. _Somethin' wrong._

"No, this is Ratchet. What's wrong?"

"Th…there's…somethin' wrong…" Frenzy mumbled as he slid to the floor.

"Frenzy? What? What is it?"

But Frenzy couldn't answer. He sat propped up against the wall, unable to move a servo. The last thing he registered was a brief glimpse of the monitor on the wall flashing red. Then everything, inside and out, went black.

***

"This is all my fault." First Aid mused sadly. Ratchet was glad that he wasn't facing the Protectobot, which left him free to make whatever open-mouthed, exasperated face he wanted to. _Here it goes, _the older medic thought to himself. The younger mech had been efficient and focused during the actual emergency, but now that they were finished First Aid was free to blast himself to scrap.

Hoist and Perceptor had already cleared out of the Med Bay, and Wheeljack had checked-in for his instructions and left; only Ratchet and First Aid were left to clean up and make sure their patient was staying stable.

"It's not your fault First Aid." Ratchet said, knowing that it wouldn't do a bit of good.

First Aid carefully checked over the energon lines, the jump box, the jumper cables, and the new monitors and sensors, including the small one which had been installed on Frenzy's chest. And since he was too polite to argue with the Commanding Medical Officer, he instead functionally ignored his statement.

"If only I had gone in to check on him when I relieved Ironhide. I knew better than to leave him alone. That's why we had Ironhide in there in the first place. I never should have left him alone."

Ratchet glanced at the monitors that First Aid was so carefully going over, "You couldn't have anticipated this. And look, he's fine now. They're both fine."

First Aid started going over past monitor readings, again. "Look at this." He sighed, "He hasn't recharged properly for days, no wonder he crashed. It's a wonder he didn't slip into stasis lock before you got there. Why wasn't I paying better attention? I've overseen difficult carryings in the past; this is always a crucial time. True, the schedule has gotten a bit skewed, but it always gets worse as the sparkling's plating starts to develop. If I'd looked over my past data…."

Ratchet found a seat along the wall of the bay and kicked back, debating with himself whether he should try and snap First Aid out of his self-defeating reflection. He liked the younger doctor, he really did. The Protectobot was a good medic, who knew how to keep his head clear during an emergency. And he always remembered to be kind and gentle with all his patients, something that Ratchet, who was more used to the rough and tumble camaraderie of a military unit, could forget at times. It was the compassion that got the doctor into trouble though. First Aid was a pacifist. He absolutely deplored fighting; but that was only because he was in a constant war against pain.

First Aid of course realized that causing a certain amount of pain was often necessary to repair a patient, and he stayed focused when confronted with a being experiencing pain that he couldn't relieve instantly; but accidently causing harm, hurting a patient in a way that didn't lead to healing… that was a different datachip.

Ratchet had on more than one occasion found First Aid sitting lost in thought after losing a patient, too calm to get mad at himself, but filled with an overpowering sadness as he mulled again and again over what he had done wrong, what he could have done. Ratchet knew; First Aid's quiet manners concealed an almost neurotic fixation with fixing the broken things in the world.

Ratchet noticed that First Aid usually failed to see the big picture in favor of fixing smaller, more manageable, problems and the Autobot CMO often wondered what would happen if the younger doctor were to suddenly realize just how much pain was out there that he couldn't fix; how many things were hurting in ways too big to control, or too hidden to find.

_Maybe it's better he doesn't know…_ Ratchet thought, as he stood up and walked over to the doctor who was still theorizing out-loud all the ways that the crisis they'd just weathered could have been avoided completely. He patted the Protectobot on the back, probably a little harder than he meant to.

"Well look," He started casually, "What's done is done. We know now to keep a closer eye on him, and Wheeljack should have his assignment done soon, and then the Frenzy will be able to recharge better. So, do you want to take the first watch or should I?"

"I'll take the first watch." First Aid said. "And thank you for getting to him so quickly. I don't like to think what might have happened if you hadn't."

"So don't think about it then." Ratchet sighed, "I'm going to go and catch some recharge, give me a buzz if you need to."

"Thanks Ratchet, I will." First Aid nodded, as he started on fine tuning some of the equipment they had used to stabilize the Decepticon. Ratchet shook his head in exasperation when the Protectobot had his back turned. Then the Autobot Medic headed for the exit. As he looked up to the observation deck he caught a glimpse of red behind the plexiglas. Focusing his optics, Ratchet could just barely make out a tall, boxy form standing close to the window, looking down at the doctor and his patient.

***

Frenzy's optic band came online almost before his central processor did, and the first thing it registered was the orange wall. It took the Mini-Cassette several seconds to notice that these orange walls were not _his_ orange walls. Five weeks, and he was finally out of the slaggin' orange box. It filled him with a bleary sense of glee until he came around enough to remember why he was out of the box in the first place. Then he just stared mutely up at the monitors and scanners above him and listened to the soft pinging of the machines that surrounded him and tried not to think at all.

Finally dragged one hand over to his side and tapped weakly at his chest.

"Hello Frenzy." The voice near the head of the berth was soft and gentle and Frenzy mentally marked another building down for future destruction as he filed away the rage he didn't have the energy to feel, putting it on his 'to-destroy' list.

"How are you feeling?" First Aid asked. _There goes another middle-school._

Frenzy felt like slag, in the most literal sense. He felt like a half-destroyed hunk of metal waste. And he knew that the glitch-headed doctor knew it. The Mini-Cassette sighed, and bit back the question that had instantly come to his mind. Silence had to serve for his reply, since his arms felt too heavy and sluggish to give the one-fingered salute.

First Aid walked into his line of sight, standing at the Decepticon's side with something approaching anxiety betrayed in his posture. "I'm very sorry this happened Frenzy." He said. "It was my fault for not monitoring you closer."

The 'sorry' pierced Frenzy's spark like an energon-blade. He stared up at the ceiling, trying his best not to make a face, and dug the tip of his thumb into the joint where his index finger met his hand, digging in between the plating until he hit a sensor line and the pain shot up his arm, distracting from other, deeper, aches. _So that's that then. Fuck._

Then Frenzy felt a familiar flutter.

After he'd recovered from the shock of it and suppressed every emotion he'd felt over the past few seconds he turned his head to glare at First Aid.

"I feel like shit doc." he rasped. "What the hell happened?"

"Your lack of recharge caused several systems to begin to malfunction. Your energon pump began diverting energon and raw materials from systems that it shouldn't've, and instead tried to use them elsewhere. Your sparkling entered a form of half-stasis, and started sending emergency signals to your cosmotron and other core components, which just couldn't handle the stress."

Frenzy's optic band flickered in a blink.

"You crashed." First Aid summarized.

"Why the hell didn't you just say that?" Frenzy shifted a little, and tried to catch glimpses of some of the monitors.

First Aid moved so he was in his patient's sights again. "Luckily you noticed in time, and alerted us. We were able to correct the malfunction, for now at least, and give you quick jump." He paused. He really wanted his patient to ask this question on his own.

Instead Frenzy put on hand on his chest and made a face. "Well the little slagger's kicking again."

_I guess I'll have to take that_, First Aid thought. "Your sparkling seems to have bounced back all right. Though we were concerned for a while. I've attached a monitor to your chest. It will let me keep a closer watch on the sparkling's condition. It's still smaller than I would like to see, and I'm starting to get worried."

A shadow passed over Frenzy's face, but he seemed to recover from it quickly. He opened his mouth, then hesitated. When First Aid realized his patient had clammed up again he continued.

"Wheeljack is working on something that should help you recharge better, but I'm still going to keep you in the med-bay for the remainder of your carrying so we can keep a better watch on you both. That is," First Aid paused, "unless you want to see a little more of the base? Give you a feel for the place? Let you meet some of the other Autobots? All you have to do is—"

"I'm ready." Frenzy cut in.

"What?"

"I'm ready to talk, to you I mean, about stuff. Ironhide was right, an…uhh….they're not coming for me. I'm ready to talk." Frenzy stared at the ceiling.

"I'm glad to hear that Frenzy." First Aid said softly, and he genuinely felt glad. He patted the red and black Decepticon on the shoulder. "Why don't you rest for a few more hours, and when you feel up to it, then we'll talk."

Frenzy nodded, and First Aid watched as his optic band went offline. The doctor turned back to his datapads, one optic sensor still watching the monitors. He felt a wave of relief when he saw them indicate that the Mini-Cassette had gone into recharge again.

_He's ready to talk…_he thought to himself. The Autobot doctor was relieved. _Now we can get to the core of it, and move on._ After five long weeks, they would finally have the rest of the story.

So why was the Autobot so uneasy?


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: This chapter gets pretty serious. Just wanted to let you know, we finally get to the hard part of the story. Working hard on the next few chapters, I might not make my deadline, but I'm going to try. Please read and review.

***

"This conversation will be confidential, Frenzy." First Aid took a seat next to Frenzy's berth. The Cassetticon was sitting cross legged on the oversized examining table trying his hardest to resist the urge to fidget. "Other than me, only Optimus Prime will know what you say here. No one else will be told anything unless there is a medical or security risk involved. The rest of the Autobots will not know if you choose not to tell them. Do you understand?"

Frenzy nodded. Now that he knew he had to have this conversation, he just wanted to get it over with as soon as possible so he could forget about it. He felt a lot better after recharging for a few hours, and he only hoped that they would be done before the stupid cowboy show, since First Aid had promised that Ironhide was planning on moving a TV into the medbay before the episode started. If they were done in time.

"Okay then." First Aid couldn't help but feeling a little unsure, though he'd had his questions prepared for weeks. They all had. Without moving his head he shot a glance up to the observation deck. The observation room was dark so that it was impossible to see through the glass. It was impossible to see the mechs that the doctor knew were standing there, watching the conversation from the dimmed room. "We'll just take this slow then."

Frenzy sighed. "Whatever."

"What were you doing attacking the lighthouse five weeks ago?" First Aid asked.

Pausing for a beat Frenzy answered. "Uhh…I was attacking a lighthouse?"

First Aid nodded and entered the answer into his datapad. "Had you been ordered to attack the lighthouse?"

"No."

Entering that answer brought up the next question on the datapad. "Were the other Decepticon's aware that you were attacking the lighthouse?"

"No."

"Were they aware that you had left Decepticon Headquarters?"

"No." This wasn't so hard. _It's not like the truth is any different from a lie. 'Cus none of it is gonna matter._

"Why were you attacking the lighthouse?"

Frenzy paused, and actually thought back since it was what got him into this mess in the first place. "I just wanted something to destroy I guess."

The Autobot gave his patient a long look before entering the answer. "Why did you want to destroy something?"

Frenzy snorted, "Ya mean a Decepticon's gotta have a reason?"

First Aid put down his datapad. "Frenzy," he started softly, which made the Decepticon's gears grind, "you have to answer these questions to the best of your ability, or you won't be granted the privileges you want. You have to trust us if we're going to trust you."

_Tell 'em anything ta get them ta trust you._ _Even the truth._ Frenzy sighed. "I was mad."

First Aid nodded and picked up his datapad. "Thank you Frenzy. Were you mad at someone?"

"No. Not really. I was just mad. I like to destroy slag when I get mad."

"So we've noticed." First Aid chuckled softly. Then he grew serious again as he scanned the next question. "Did you know you were carrying when you attacked the lighthouse?"

"Yes." Frenzy shifted on the table, not able to resist fidgeting now.

"How long had you known?"

"A coupla hours I guess…" Frenzy was looking around the room, less and less sure of himself. First Aid gave him a moment while he pretended to take longer to enter the answer.

"How did you find out?" First Aid leaned forward a little, trying to keep the connection up.

_Slag._ The Decepticon had been pretty sure that the conversation would eventually steer this way, but he realized now that he hadn't really prepared himself for it. It was gonna be harder than lying, answering questions. "My…uh…Rumble figured it out."

"Rumble?" First Aid was surprised. But only for a moment.

"Yeah, he figured it out….why I was, you know, sick and slag. I'd been feeling like shit for a while."

"How did Rumble know?"

_Damn it. Truth or a lie?_ It was his brother, he just… he couldn't tell the truth. So he shrugged and tried his best to act nonchalant, "He just recognized it, I don't know why."

First Aid was unsure, but the question was growing in his mind. "Frenzy, has Rumble ever been sparked before?"

Frenzy shrugged staring at the ceiling, which was all the answer First Aid really needed. The Autobot went back to his datapad.

"Did any of the other Decepticons know that you were carrying when you attacked the lighthouse?"

"No."

"Do you think Rumble would have told them?"

Something closer to the truth was gonna be more believable, Frenzy decided. "Yeah, maybe Soundwave. Then Soundwave would have decided whether or not to tell anyone else. Rumble wouldn't have told nobody but Soundwave."

"Why do you think they haven't come for you?"

The Decepticon snorted, "Because we're suppose' to make it back on our own. Stay in the box, or keep up. Nobody comes back for anybody except the Boss."

"The 'box'?"

"Soundwave."

"If they knew you were carrying would they come back for you?"

"No." Frenzy was beginning to treasure that word. One syllable, and it was the truth.

"If you came back carrying would they take you back?"

"Yeah, probably."

"And what would they do with the sparkling?"

"They'd terminate it." Frenzy froze as he realized he hadn't thought about what he was saying before he said it. First Aid caught his optics and the Decepticon suddenly felt like all his circuits had been laid bare.

"Do you want to go back?" First Aid asked. And Frenzy knew that he had to lie.

"No." When First Aid seemed unconvinced he added, "Well, a little. Sometimes. I miss Rumble." _Cover up the lie with a truth real quick._

"Rumble is your brother?"

"Duh." Frenzy scoffed.

"How old are you?"

The Mini-Cassette cocked his head to one side, "Heh, four million years old." He smirked.

First Aid was unamused, "Let's subtract time spent in stasis lock."

Frenzy frowned and drummed his fingers on his leg. "I…uh…I don't really know…I guess…uh…I spend a lot of time in the box, and it's slaggin' hard to keep track of time in there."

"Who were your creators?"

The Mini-Cassette's frown deepened. He'd been expecting hard questions, but not these. He thought for a long time, dredging up ancient memories that only seemed to go back so far. Finally he just shrugged, trying to ignore the sudden empty feeling.

"Is Soundwave one of your creators?"

"I…" Frenzy froze and considered the tall blue mech in his mind for a second, on the one hand it felt as natural as transforming for it to be true. But he never had been told. "I don't know. If he is, he ain't never told us."

First Aid nodded and entered the answer, then glanced up at the observation deck. And back down at the datapad. The next question was waiting.

"Frenzy," he started slowly and saw the Decepticon shrink at the tone of his voice, "every sparkling requires two creators, and it requires them to have mingled their sparks several times in order for enough energy to be absorbed by the carrier spark."

The Mini-Cassette was sitting on the berth very rigidly, staring at the datapad. First Aid gathered himself, and continued. "I know that this may be hard for you, but we need to know who the other creator of your sparkling is."

"Why?" Frenzy spat, still sitting stiffly. This was the question he'd been expecting all along. But now that they'd gotten to it, it was only making him mad. _The dumb slaggers don't even understand. And why is it any of their business anyway?_

First Aid leaned trying to be soothing, but in truth he was becoming more and more uncomfortable looking at the young, mini-sized, Decepticon sitting in his med-bay. "No one but myself and Prime will need to know this information, unless we think there's a security issue involved. But understand Frenzy, because of your size and age, this is why carrying has been so difficult for you. It could even be life threatening if not properly taken care of. Who…whoever it was, Frenzy, knowingly put your health at risk. They did something…inappropriate…they did something wrong."

"Says you!" His chin jutted out defiantly.

"Did you know the risks involved with bare spark interfacing?" The Decepticon brought his knees up to his chest, slowly and awkwardly, and crossed his arms over them.

"No."

"Most do know. So unless your…partner…was younger and more inexperienced than you, they were aware they were putting you at risk."

"So what? What's that got to do with anything?"

"Was your partner younger than you?"

"No! And he wasn't fraggin' my 'partner'! We…we were just…fooling around…" trailing off, Frenzy rested his chin on his arm looking down at his feet absently.

"Is that what he told you?" Silence. "Bare spark interfacing is nothing to fool around about, Frenzy. It is the most intimate act that two transformers can engage in, baring their souls completely and allowing their energy to mix. Primus gave it to us to foster closeness, to strengthen relationships, to create new life, connecting the two bots that created it and connecting them both to their offspring. He never meant it to be something that we did flippantly, thoughtlessly, to satisfy our own desires."

Frenzy snorted, but wouldn't look at the doctor. "Yeah, says _you_. Buncha uptight slaggin' Autobots. You probably haven't had a good frag in a long time? Have you? Hell, you've probably never even done it. So how the Pit do you get off tellin' me anything about it? Dumb, stick-up-your afts Autobots. Think ya gotta make rules for every fraggin little thing ya do; cus Primus forbid ya bang someone else's bumper havin' a little fun."

First Aid was at a loss. He didn't want to counter Frenzy's argument, since he didn't want to antagonize him and risk him withdrawing, or worse, getting angry and using up too much energy. He felt his spark sink as he realized that what he'd been taught was a sacred, serious, and very private act, Frenzy considered just another recreational activity. He pretended to enter Frenzy's entire answer, knowing that he'd have to pull another trick to keep the conversation going.

He sighed, and turned off the datapad. "Well," He said, standing up, "We can't continue this conversation until you answer each question. I'll let Ironhide know that we're done. And that you will be confined to Med-Bay."

"Wait!" Frenzy seemed almost over-eager, and a little angry, "You wanted me to be honest, right? So I let you know how it is. But that doesn't mean I won't answer the damn question. I just wanted to know why it was so important. Okay? I'll answer. I just wanted to know. Okay?"

First Aid sat down again. "Okay," he said slowly turning his datapad back on. "We'll continue then."

In the observation deck Optimus Prime resisted the urge to rest his arm against the glass in frustration. "This isn't going as well as I'd hoped," he said softly. He felt a strong, reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"This can't be easy fer the kid." Ironhide said. "Aid'll get it out of him. You'll see."

"That's what I'm afraid of." The Autobot leader stared down at the Cassetticon sitting curled defensively in the middle of the examining table. "I'm not sure he's…" Optimus stopped, and looked to his friend. Ironhide only nodded grimly. Technically Ironhide was up here with Prime because anything that a Decepticon prisoner said could potentially pose a security risk. But Optimus had other reasons for letting the old mech watch the conversation with him. To be some moral support was one. And Ironhide had requested it.

First Aid decided that since Frenzy had asked for an explanation, that he probably deserved one. But he was having a hard time putting one together that didn't sound too condescending. Finally he'd settled on explaining that it was a security and medical matter. Frenzy didn't seem to care enough to question the reasons anymore anyway. There was a long silence, First Aid wondering if he would need to ask the question again.

From the moment First Aid had threatened to cut off the conversation Frenzy had begun to repeat Rumble's words to himself. _Tell em anything. Who cares what they think? It doesn't matter._ He knew the question was coming again, and he prepared himself for it this time. _Tell 'em anything, about anyone._ Frenzy almost smiled inside. _An at least it'll be fun to see his expression when I tell him,_ he told himself. _This outta shock that uptight slagger right out of his plating._

"Frenzy, I'm sorry, but we have to know. Who is the other creator of your sparkling?" First Aid's voice was gentle and pained.

"Megatron." Frenzy jutted his chin out proudly, though he'd crossed his arms over his knees again.

_He's lying._ All three Autobots listening thought the same thing simultaneously. But something about the raw, bold, desperate way that the Mini-Cassette was holding himself, the almost animal anxiety betrayed behind the bravado, twisted their sparks into recognizing the truth. The truth was written all over the Decepticon's faceplates.

"Wh…why?" First Aid struggled to get a hold of himself.

Frenzy sneered, "Silly Autobot. Just because you guys never have any fun doesn't mean the Decepticons don't get to. We fool around with each other all the time. And Megatron?" Frenzy gave a short laugh. "Megatron don't ever recharge alone. He's probably messed around with everyone on base at least twice." _Tell 'em anything, even the truth. Who cares what stupid Autobots think?_ "He usually goes with Soundwave, but…" Frenzy shrugged, relishing the Autobot's stupefied posture.

First Aid didn't know what to think, what to ask. He entered the answer to the question as if he were on autopilot, and watched as the next question came up. "When did you first interface?" The doctor focused on his patient entirely, not letting his processor linger on imagining the act.

"Aw..I don' really know, it was some time after we'd come outta stasis here though. An' after that time we all got dumped in lava."

"How did it happen?"

Frenzy scoffed, "You seriously want a slaggin' play by play?"

"NO." First Aid gathered himself, "That won't be necessary. I just want to know how the subject was…broached."

Frenzy sighed, and shuffled a little bit. He was staying extremely focused on the moment right now. Extremely focused. _Just tell em the truth and don't think about it. Get the damn conversation over with. It dosen't matter. You don't really care._ The sparkling kicked near his side and he frowned and rubbed at it. "Uh…he suggested it, then it happened. I don't really know what you want to hear."

"The truth."

"Then that's the truth. He brought it up, we did it, end of story. It's not like we went all starry-eyed over each other or something. We were just fooling around. He asked."

The doctor regarded the Decepticon very carefully, which made Frenzy nervous. "Frenzy, did you want to?"

The Mini-Cassette drummed on his knees and shrugged. "Yeah, I guess." He was staring up at the monitors around him.

First Aid paused, feeling his spark twisting inside him. "Frenzy," he started more forcefully this time, "did you want to interface with Megatron?"

The Decepticon stared him in the optic band and he could feel the anger seething there. "I didn't say no." he said, his voice even and straining to be light and easy. He shrugged. "I was curious."

There was a long pause where nothing moved.

"I didn't say no. I never said no." Frenzy repeated.

"Frenzy, did you want to interface with Megatron?" The doctor repeated the question again, very slowly, and Frenzy could hear the pity in First Aid's voice. Something inside him snapped.

"No! No I didn't fucking _want_ to!" He shouted and waved his arms. "Would you? I mean, fuck! But I never said no, and I didn't slaggin' fight it. I went along with it! It's Megatron, and he's the Boss. The Goddamn Boss wanted to! With me! What was I slaggin supposed to do? Tell him to fuck off? Tell him he wasn't really my slaggin' type. Shit. I didn't say no. I never said no. NOT FRAGGIN' ONCE. You don't say no to the goddamn boss. I just dealt with it. It was easier that way." Frenzy glared at the doctor sitting stunned by his berth. "And don't ya slaggin' dare pity me you little lube-stain. It wasn't fuckin' everyday, it wasn't fuckin' chains and whips and shit, and it wasn't. Fucking. RAPE!" The word seemed to echo through the Med Bay, assaulting everyone's audials. Ironhide up in the observation deck felt it stabbing into his spark.

"Could you have said no?" First Aid's voice was raw, but gentle. He'd lost his composure, leaving his compassion bare and unguarded.

"I don't know and I don't care, cuz I didn't fucking try." Frenzy growled. "It wasn't worth the trouble."

First Aid clenched his fists loosely, to hide his hands' shaking. "Listen to me Frenzy." He said sadly. "Whether or not you could have said no, what Megatron did was wrong. Very wrong. For so many reasons. Superior officers should never proposition those of very inferior rank, leaders should never pressure their followers. And it is completely unacceptable to interface with someone who doesn't know the risks involved, especially someone like you, for whom the risks are so great. Do you understand Frenzy? Megatron abused his position of authority." Frenzy glared at the Autobot. "Megatron abused you."

The Cassetticon's face hardened, his glare becoming a mask. First Aid waited, patiently, practically seeping empathy, searching the Decepticon's glare for some sign that he understood, that he knew what had been done to him, and that it was wrong. The patient on the table finally shifted a little bit, and craned his head downward so he was glaring at his own feet. He tightened his curl on himself, as if he wished he could fold into his cassette mode and shrink away.

Up in the observation room Ironhide was finding it harder and harder to watch, but he couldn't pull himself away. His whole body was tight and rigid as the fire in his spark burned hotter and hotter with every word. Primus, he wanted to smash something. His fists were clenched tightly, thumbs on the inside. He felt a hand on his shoulder and he turned to Optimus. The outrage in the Autobot leader's eye's matched his own.

"How could he?" Ironhide's voice was a low growl, each word straining to not slip into a shout. Optimus only squeezed his shoulder and nodded.

When he thought that it was safe, First Aid began again. "Did Soundwave know what was happening?"

"Yes." Frenzy answered flatly.

"Did Rumble?"

"Yes."

"Did they do anything about it?"

"No. They both fooled around with Megatron too."

"Soundwave didn't do anything to try and stop it, with either you or Rumble?"

Frenzy shook his head slowly, his shoulders hunched. He was trying not to think about it. He was trying to get the answers from his memory chips and out without having to process them. But the anger, the anxiety, the shame that parts of him were feeling were getting in the way, jumbling him up so much he didn't know what to do or think any more. His processor jumped back and forth between remembering and suppressing, between the urge to lie and the compulsion to tell the truth.

"Did it hurt?"

The Cassetticon's face contorted. "Yeah." He choked. "It hurt." his voice broke and he curled his head into his chest, he wrapped his arms around his helm as he rested his forehead on his knees, obscuring his whole face. Then he was shaking.

Up in the observation room Ironhide's anger couldn't sustain itself anymore. He felt his whole body droop, as he watched the Mini-Cassette struggling for control. Optimus rested one arm across his friend's strong square shoulders, trying to comfort the older mech. "How could he?" Ironhide's voice was haunted.

First Aid was sitting beside Frenzy on the berth now. One hand was gently resting on the Decepticon's back as the Mini-Cassette trembled and tried to swallow his sobs. "I'm very sorry, Frenzy" the Autobot said sadly.

"I don't want your slaggin' pity." The Cassetticon spat haltingly. "I never told him no. It's my own fraggin' fault."

"Why did you attack the lighthouse after you learned you were carrying a sparkling?"

"I already told you. I was mad." His voice was hollow and defeated.

"Why were you mad?"

"I had talked to Rumble, he'd figured things out."

"And?"

"And." Frenzy felt the anger in him rise again. "And he told me that I wasn't gonna get to keep it. That nobody cared. That…" his voice broke, "that it was gonna be a sawed-off little scrap that wouldn't never do no good for nobody." The Mini-Cassette's words were clipped and strangled, and he crossed his arms over his chest protectively. "That he didn't care who the other creator was."

"Who didn't care?"

"Soundwave. Megatron. Nobody cares. And nobody gets to keep em."

First Aid rubbed his patient's back soothingly, "And you wanted to keep it?"

Frenzy shrugged and hung his head. "Yes…no…Wha…what am I gonna do with a sparkling?" There was an edge of panic in his voice. "What am I gonna do?"

"Do you want to keep your sparkling, Frenzy?"

The Mini-Cassette hugged himself tightly and felt the sparkling, his sparkling, shift inside him. Every other consideration, every other agenda, fell away. "Yes," he breathed, and bowed his head, beaten.

He felt a hand on his chin, raising his head to meet the optic band of the Autobot doctor next to him. He saw how pained the medic was, as if he was hurting worse than the Cassetticon. "Then we will help you keep it Frenzy." He said gently. "All of us. We will help you. Now, and after. We'll teach you to take care of it. We'll make sure you know how to keep it safe. We'll watch over you. Both. Okay?"

Frenzy nodded mutely. Exhausted. First Aid sat with him for a while in silence. "Are you tired?" He asked, looking at the monitors closely. Frenzy nodded again. "Then you should probably rest. I only had a few more questions anyway. And none of them were very important. So why don't you rest now." The Autobot doctor stood up as the Cassetticon lay down, still partially curled around himself. Wandering to another part of the Med Bay First Aid straightened up idly, until he saw his patient slip into a deep recharge.

Ironhide managed to keep control of himself as they exited the deck. He stared, dazed, while he heard Optimus shut the door to the observation room behind him. He stood there stiffly as his friend approached him. He didn't move a servo as his friend stopped beside him.

"Ironhide?"

With a strangled yell Ironhide slammed his fist into the wall in front of him. He whirled on the Autobot leader. "How could he!? That…that--Prime, how could he?!" Prime put both of his hands on Ironhide's shoulders.

"I know Ironhide. I know." His voice was low, his anger tempered with sadness and concern for his friend.

"He's just a kid, Prime. A KID. How could he do that!?" Ironhide pulled away and started pacing the halls. "I swear, I swear from here to Cyberton, next time I get mah hands on that strutless, sparkless, glitchin' monster I'm gonna make 'im wish he'd never been assembled!" The old mech stopped and sighed raggedly, facing the door to the observation room. Optimus came up behind the fuming Autobot and put his hand on his friend's shoulder again.

"I'm just as mad, Ironhide." Prime's voice was tight. "But there's more important things for us to do than punish Megatron. That won't help Frenzy." Ironhide sagged.

"I know, Optimus." He growled softly, each word aching like his spark. "But… how could he?"


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: First of all I want to apologize for promising you chapters that I haven't delivered. I spent all of the first part of Christmas break WORKING, and all of the second part on a trip to visit some very good friends. Today was my first day back a college, and of course THAT made me finally get this chapter polished up enough to post. It was going to be longer, but for PRIMUS SAKE, I needed to get something up! I hope I'm back in the saddle for good, since it seems I need school to give me something that writing distracts me from. Hope you all had wonderful holidays! Thanks to everyone who's read and reviewed!

___

First Aid sat in the Med Bay twiddling with the broken pocket calculator in front of him. The tiny rectangle was hardly wider than his finger and he poked at it with a narrow screwdriver almost listlessly. He'd found it in a dumpster months ago. Though it displayed numbers and did calculations it didn't work right. He'd taken it apart and reassembled it dozens of times, but it still insisted that any number divided by any number equaled 8008135 any number added to any number equaled 1138. For some reason it multiplied correctly.

The Autobot doctor looked around the Medbay, discouraged even with the calculator, but there was nothing else broken he could see; at least nothing broken he could fix with his hands. His optics lingered on the recharging patient across the room. Finally he turned back to the calculator with a sigh.

He slowly unscrewed a tiny screw and held it delicately in front of his optic band. The head of the screw was almost stripped, and it was getting harder and harder to manipulate it every time. Absently First Aid wondered if it would go against his principles to replace it with a new one. He stared at the worn out screw. _Hmmm…maybe I can recast the head of it…_ He set the screw gently aside and got started running diagnostics on the rudimentary circuit board. _Something so simple shouldn't have such complex problems_, he thought, and honestly didn't have a clear idea what precisely he was referring to.

For the last hour, as he got further and further from his conversation with Frenzy, First Aid had been thinking of ways to help the Mini-Cassette, completely involuntarily. He'd several times tried to redirect his processor to something more immediate. Somehow this time thinking of ways to help only made him feel worse instead of better, but his thoughts kept on slipping back, compulsively dredging up idea after idea, along with all the associated pain.

_Five weeks… I should have pushed him to talk sooner. If he'd talked sooner we could have really been helping him sooner. He's been hiding so much from us._ For five weeks First Aid's patient had been in pointless, untreated pain; and it was eating the doctor up inside. But not as bad as the knowledge that he'd overlooked it completely. _No wonder it's been so hard for him to come to decisions, after what he's been through._ He'd been so focused on the sparkling and the patient's physical state, that he'd not given the patient's mental state enough attention. He'd only given it enough treatment to get by. _That's why he's been having trouble sleeping._ First Aid concluded. _That's why he crashed._

"Prime says he wants to talk to you."

First Aid turned away from his workbench to face Ironhide. The Security Bot was standing near the entrance to the medbay holding a television in one hand and a television rack in the other. It was the television that had been in Frenzy's cell.

"I'll watch the kid while you're gone." Ironhide added, already scoping out a place to set up the TV.

Nodding, the Autobot doctor put his tools down and walked over to the recharging patient, checking the monitors one last time before heading for the door.

"Heya wait, Aid." Ironhide asked. First Aid stopped and turned back to the older mech, who seemed a little unsure, glancing up at the monitors which showed that Frenzy was deep in recharge. "I…uh…that is…I just wanted ta say that, I thought ya did a good job, today, you know, with the kid and stuff. A real good job."

First Aid was surprised, and touched. "Thank you Ironhide."

"Yeah." The Security Bot coughed and scratched the back of him helm." An, uh, also, I was just, wondering… Seein' as we're gonna have a sparkling around the place soon…uh..if you had any info on 'em. Ya know. What they need and stuff. Fer Security."

Waving the soldier closer, First Aid headed to a wall compartment where they kept datapads. "I think I have what you're looking for." He answered, his mood starting to perk up now that someone else wanted to help. He shuffled through several stacks until he found the right one.

"I was going to give this one to Frenzy as soon as he woke up. This is the one I give to all new creators, but if you'd like to read it first..." The Protectobot handed Ironhide the datapad. "If you need any additional information, just let me know."

Ironhide gave an awkward half-grin. "Thanks." he muttered as he glanced at the information. As First Aid left the Med Bay, Ironhide got started setting up the TV. Since the ceiling was nearly three times as high in the Med Bay as it was in Frenzy's old cell he decided to hang the TV rack from the side of one of the monitors instead. His face hardened as he got to work. Just being close to the kid was stirring up the fire in his belly. And before he knew he was fighting mad again.

Right after leaving the observation deck he and Prime had had a long conversation, well, long for Ironhide anyway; and most of the talk had been an effort to calm Ironhide down. They'd talked about what Frenzy had said, but over and over again Optimus had to steer Ironhide's attention back to Frenzy and the sparkling and away from Megatron and Soundwave's role in the situation. But Ironhide couldn't help it. There was nothing really more he could do that he wasn't doing already. He was satisfied that he was watching over things from the Autobot end, and that First Aid had everything medical and confusing under control. Everything that could be taken care of by Autobots had been taken care of. That just left the Decepticons.

Ironhide hadn't seen this coming. Though he'd known Prime and Aid had suspicions, his own speculation-- and anyone who knew the situation had theories whether they wanted them or not--was that the Cassetticon had been fooling around with someone else in the rank and file. Maybe someone who had taken advantage of Frenzy's youth and inexperience, but not anything like this. Never in his glitchiest recharge cycles had he considered Megatron.

Ironhide face twisted a little as he felt a turning in his tanks at the thought. Sure, Megatron was capable of worse. He'd twisted minds and destroyed lives. He'd killed and maimed and tortured. Ironhide had been around to witness most of it for millions of years. But that had been war. This was worse. Megatron was the leader of the Decepticons and Frenzy _was_ a Decepticon; Megatron had hurt one of his followers, one of his own soldiers. Megatron could decimate millions, but as long as he was loyal to those who served him Ironhide could scrape up some shred of respect for the mech. Ironhide may still have hated him with every microspark in his body, but he hated him as the leader of the opposite side in a war. Now Ironhide hated him mech to mech. Because Megatron had failed as a leader. He had hurt something that he should have protected. And because of that, Soundwave was in some ways even worse.

As he finished tightening the final screw Ironhide cast a glance at the recharging Decepticon. There were worse, deeper, reasons for Ironhide's anger. Something precious and wonderful, something he associated deeply with things he loved most in the universe, had been twisted painfully, with results both deadly serious and utterly confusing. Ironhide took a seat and rubbed his optics not really wanting to examine this side of it, at least not alone. All he knew is that he had a deeper respect for First Aid, and a much higher opinion of Frenzy now. He still thought the little fragger was a junk punk; but he'd gone through so much to protect and care for a thing so pure and helpless and, in Ironhide's eyes, sacred. Frenzy wanted his sparkling even though he had every reason in the universe not to. And it was eating Ironhide up inside.

Ironhide kicked back and grabbed the remote. Settling into his seat close enough to Frenzy's berth that he could keep an eye on all the monitors, he started cruising the channels. He tried to brush his anger away again, but it lingered. _One thing I'm sure about though,_ he thought, _if the kid wants his sparkling, I'm gonna do everythin' in my power to make sure he gets it safe._

_Safe. Heh, there was the kick._ Ironhide turned on the datapad in his hands and began scanning the information. He skimmed past the 'Congratulations on Your New Manufacture' and skipped right to heading one: 'How to Hold a New Sparkling'.

***

Optimus gestured for First Aid to sit down almost as soon as the Protectobot entered his office. The Autobot leader remained standing though, not wanting to put his workstation between them. He could tell by the doctor's hunched shoulders and distracted air that he'd already been brooding about what they'd learned earlier, and the Autobot Leader suddenly wished that he'd started this conversation before he'd talked down Ironhide. Ironhide would have been okay stewing in anger for a few hours; First Aid could be completely shut down with despondency if he wasn't thrown in a different gear soon enough.

Pushing all of his own anger and sadness away to be dealt with later, Optimus decided to begin pleasantly. "First of all First Aid, I would like to commend you on a job well done this afternoon. Not many Bots could have handled the situation as well as you did. You really have been a miracle worker in this."

First Aid looked up. "Thank you Optimus," he replied rather glumly, "but I won't take that compliment until I know both of them are out of the ion storm."

"Still." Optimus sat down on his workstation. "I _have_ gathered that we're going to have a new arrival in two or three weeks." He said warmly.

First Aid's shoulders hunched further, "Hopefully." He answered. "If everything goes well. There's still a nineteen percent chance that the sparkling will suffer a system failure either during delivery or right after. And I'm almost certain that it will need some time in the Med Bay. It's just…so small."

Optimus felt his spark ache. He nodded seriously, but tried to sound upbeat, "You've taken care of similar situations, I know. I'm sure you've discussed these things with the medical staff? And with Frenzy?"

"Yes, though I don't think that Frenzy really understands. I've given the rest of the medical staff very detailed instructions, for any eventuality. They're prepared." First Aid drummed his fingers against his leg. "Wheeljack and Perceptor are putting the finishing touches on the support berth for the sparkling in case it is delivered early. They've read my case files. We're all ready."

Optimus gave First Aid a pat on the shoulder. "I knew that you would be. But is Frenzy?"

Cocking his head to one side, First Aid considered. "No, I don't think he is. But in my experience a creator is never entirely ready. For Frenzy, I think he is going to have to see it, and touch it, before he realizes what exactly it means. I don't know if he's even seen a sparkling before. It's going to take a long time for him to learn to take care of it properly."

"It wouldn't hurt to start now would it? Start teaching him basic care? He needs to start thinking about the future, First Aid." Prime stood and walked around to his workstation to find a datapad. "I'm granting permission to take him around base, with supervision. And I've designated some quarters for him. I know he'll be in the Med Bay for the next few weeks, but you could show him around, if he's able. Letting him meet some of the Autobots and see his new home might start to prepare him." Handing a datapad to the doctor, Optimus caught First Aid's optic band. "This lists the places still off limits, as well as the location of his new room. It's right down the hall from Ironhide's."

"For security's sake I suppose?" First Aid asked dryly, perking up at the joke.

Optimus nodded. "Yes. I was going to ask you about that."

"About what?"

"Ironhide is... rather upset with what we learned earlier. If you could give him something to do, something to make him feel like he's helping in an important way. I don't want him just reving his anger in neutral only to take it out on the wrong thing." Optimus knew that Ironhide wouldn't want him talking about this with First Aid, and in his core Optimus knew that Ironhide would never really take his anger out on the wrong thing, but First Aid would find it easy to "fix" the old van and that should distract him a little from problems he couldn't really repair yet.

"Yes," First Aid answered after thinking for a moment, "I think I can find some ways for him to help. I gave him a datapad on sparkling care earlier…"

Optimus suppressed a laugh. "Did you now?"

"Yes, he asked for the information himself. It seems strange to me, him wanting to get so involved."

_It's not strange to me, _Prime thought warmly. He restacked several datapads on his workstation, then sat down. "First Aid, I want to make sure you aren't feeling overwhelmed by this situation."

"Sir?" First Aid seemed confused.

Prime laced his fingers on the station, and for a moment stared at his hands before looking at his Autobot. "I know it can be very difficult, having people depending on you for so much. First Aid," The Autobot leader's low voice was gentle but firm, "I want you to do what you can, but if things go wrong then I need you to let it go. It's easy to see the way you should have taken through your rearview mirror, but then you can't see what is coming up ahead. There's no use trying to take a turn that you've already missed."

"You're telling me not to glitch over spilled motor oil?" First Aid almost sounded hurt.

"I'm saying that while hindsight may have optimal acuity, it hardly ever shows you what you need to see." Prime's shoulders bowed a little. "I'm only reminding you that we all have bots depending on us, and try as we may, we are only machines. We all already have enough holding us back and bringing us down, we don't need to do it to ourselves."

First Aid nodded slowly. "I think I understand Prime."

Prime straightened up. "I thought you might." In his core the Autobot leader knew that his instructions were only another distraction. First Aid wouldn't, couldn't, change who he was deep inside, and it wasn't in his character to even be self-aware enough to realize it. Optimus could only plant a guiding thought in the Protectobot's mind, hopefully to put him back on track when he might veer towards a harmful line of thinking. To compensate for what could never be 'corrected.'

Prime stood up again. "There's more I would like to discuss with you First Aid, but I think we all need some time to process things before we delve into them too deeply. So unless you have any questions?"

The Autobot doctor bent forward, as if examining. "Prime," his voice was shaded with innocent concern, "Are _you_ alright?"

Laughing Optimus clapped First Aid on the shoulder as the doctor stood. "First Aid, always looking for a new patient." He kept his hand on the Protectobot's back as they made their way to the door. "You just worry about making sure Frenzy knows which end of the sparkling the fuel goes in, and leave the rest to me."

First Aid nodded, eager to get back to the Med Bay. "Will do Optimus." He replied pleasantly, already half-distracted by the time he was halfway down the hall.

The second the door closed Optimus felt his shoulders sag. He walked back around his workstation and sat down heavily, sorting through the datapads halfheartedly. He could feel his own processor veering down a well worn path already.

***


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: So finishing up the 'end' of the last chapter ended up being longer than the last chapter. Go figure. It's amazing how many pages 'so and so sat and thought for a while' can fill. I am the Michael Bay of emotional monologues. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews, especially all the ones starting with 'I usually don't go for robot mpreg but…' A review starting with that sentence really helps put everything into perspective.

___

Frenzy woke to the dull, achy feeling of something small and annoying kicking against his fuel tanks. For the first time in several days he felt energetic enough to purge. He rolled to his side with a moan as the nausea moved up his tanks and sent surges through his coolant lines. He started trying to lift himself from the berth, then the Decepticon felt strong hands on his shoulders helping him to sit up. His optic visor flickered online. Ironhide was kneeling in front of him, staring inquisitively.

"Ya okay kid?"

Holding his head in his hand Frenzy moaned, "I'm gonna hurl."

"Slag." Ironhide muttered. The old Autobot hurriedly searched the room with his optics till he found a container that seemed to be empty and unimportant. "Here." He thrust the small orange crate into the Mini-Cassettes arms. "Use this."

Staring into the bottom of the container as he felt more of his systems sluggishly come back online, Frenzy tried to decide whether he was actually going to purge or not. The sparkling was still kicking at his fuel tank, but now that he was sitting up it was less uncomfortable. Mechanically speaking. For one blissful astrosecond he felt his nausea pass, and he almost smiled at how hard the little fragger nestled under his chestplates was whacking away.

Then, before he even understood why, he felt echoes of anxiety and a sudden, dizzy tearing in places too deep to be physical. Frenzy's processor coughed up the whole earlier conversation in one huge wad and everything that had been said, everything he had felt, came screaming out at him in a jumbled, confusing, mess. The Mini-Cassette felt a shuddering spasm and purged into the container.

Ironhide kept his hand on the smaller mech's back until he was sure that the Deception's tanks were empty. Taking the container away with one hand he kept the other on Frenzy's shoulder as the Cassetticon flopped back down on the examining berth. Ironhide gave Frenzy a faint pat on the arm as he stood to find some place to dispose of the container.

The Mini-Cassette lay dazed, too stunned by the twisting storm inside himself to begin to tease out its origins clearly. Ironhide took his seat again, and flipped on the TV. Then he gave Frenzy, and the monitors next to him, a cautious look. "Ya feel like ya need me ta call the doc?" he asked, but the Decepticon shook his head mutely. The larger mech shifted uncomfortably at the silence.

"Ya slept through a good episode." He commented, slowly, "'Bitter Water.' It's got a pretty good gunfight there at the end."

"Stupid cowboy crap." Frenzy snorted flatly.

Ironhide gave Frenzy a long hard stare, which Frenzy was too preoccupied to be conscious of. They sat in silence for a long time, neither of them really noticing that the channel they had stopped on was a cooking show. Lost in their individual thoughts.

Purging had numbed Frenzy's panic a little, but only because it made his processor too fritzed to focus, and his other systems were fighting the negative feedback automatically. He still felt it, and was trying his hardest to ignore it, but it kept rearing up and taking control of his thoughts. His anger and confusion built again as the struggle started frustrating him, until he just gave up. He stopped wrestling with feelings too big for him and instead sent his processor hurtling through them searching, on instinct, for the weak spot in the tangled mess of conflicting ideas. Some place he could strike at that would make the whole confusing, painful ball of emotions disappear; or at least shrink into something he could manage to shove away.

The conversation with First Aid was being cut and recut, played and replayed. Especially the end. He heard his own words echoing in his memory banks. Words about Megatron, Soundwave, even Rumble that made Frenzy's empty tanks turn and a bad taste well up in his mouth. He felt dirty, like a doubledealer, a traitor. He'd said those things, about his boss, his protector, and his family. He'd _felt_ those things.

The second that inkling of a thought entered his mind-- that he'd _felt_ those things-- Frenzy automatically gathered up his strongest weapon and bashed the idea from his datatracks. _I was just doing what I was told. Tell em any pathetic sob story you want. The more they pity you the more they'll trust you. Who cares what damn Autobot's think?_ Yeah, maybe he'd felt those things _then_; but the Autobot had tricked him, made him uncomfortable, mixed issues he cared about with things he obviously didn't. And it didn't matter anyway, since now they trusted him even more than they would have otherwise. He'd done his job, and done it well. He'd done what Soundwave asked. And now it was only a matter of time before he'd stolen something good and gotten back to the Decepticons where he belonged.

Frenzy grinned inwardly as he felt the anxiety shrink enough to be batted away. He was getting his tour of Autobot Headquarters soon. He'd be able to find something good, he was sure of it. Soon everything would be back to normal.

A sudden sharp kick, right beneath his spark chamber. And unexpectedly a deeper and more primal fear rose up to overwhelm him. And the fear told him, like a command from outside himself, that he couldn't go back to the Decepticons, not now, now ever.

_Never go back?_ It was unconscionable. Never see Rumble or Ravage, Laserbeak or Ratbat…heck even Buzzsaw again. Never taunt Starscream or tease Reflector. Never hear the little human squishies shriek in terror, or the groans of Autobots, as the wonderful raging madness inside himself turned the world red at the edges.

Never see Soundwave again. Never fold himself up and lose himself in the peaceful darkness inside his unit's chest. Never know that wonderfully safe kind of temporary oblivion ever again.

He HAD to go back. He needed to.

Another hard kick. Frenzy shifted uncomfortably, earning him a sideways look from the mech sitting close by. Frenzy tapped at his chest nervously, and was shocked when the sparkling seemed to shift in response to it. _Probably likes the attention._

_They're not gonna let you keep it._ Frenzy clenched his fists and tried to ignore himself again. He'd kept his promise to the little fragger. He hadn't let the Autobot's terminate it. He'd go back to the 'Cons, and they would do things right…

The deep, icy fear hit him like a semi. Thoughts, more emotions with words, surfaced on their own. Frenzy clenched his fists tighter as he used every ounce of processor power he had to keep the thoughts from sinking in. _You didn't even let it offline on its own when you had the chance._ Frenzy curled his fist over chest._ You asked all those damn questions. You've made yourself lie mostly still for…how many Primus forsaken weeks?_

You told the Pitspawned Autobots you wanted it.

And you _felt_ it.

You can't go back, you can never go back.

A black well of despair opened up in Frenzy's life, and he had the strongest urge to throw himself into it. _They aren't gonna let you keep it. Nobody gets to keep 'em._

Why?

The thought came down like a lifeline and Frenzy grasped the idea frantically. Why wouldn't they let him keep it? Had anyone ever _asked_? Sure, Frenzy supposed that sparklings took time and care and stuff, but _someone_ had to have them, or there wouldn't be any new Decepticons at all. Why not him? Especially now that it would be more trouble to terminate than to go ahead and have. Especially after he'd stolen something good. _Sittin' pretty in Megsy's good graces for a pretty fucking long time._ Besides, even if it was just another 'runt', runts can be useful. Wasn't Frenzy about to prove it? And it wasn't like both the little slagger's parents were nothing. Frenzy didn't think that Megatron really cared…in that way. But it had to count for something. It wouldn't hurt to ask.

Had anyone ever asked?

Frenzy didn't know, but he clung to his tiny shred of vague hope like it was a ruby crystal. He might not have all the details hammered out. He really didn't even have a clear idea what exactly his idea was.

But it wouldn't hurt to _ask_. He was so close anyway…

He could take care of it on his own. Maybe Rumble could help him. He just needed a little time, to figure out everything they needed. Some place safe to put it…he guessed… and something to feed it. Frenzy drummed his fingers against his chest, lost in thought.

Ironhide was just about to go get the Decepticon a cube of enriched energon to make up for what he had purged, and maybe pick up a cube for himself, when he realized that the Mini-Cassette was staring at him curiously.

"You have any kids?" Frenzy asked.

Ironhide was taken aback by the sudden question, and it took him a moment to find his thoughts. It took him even longer to answer.

"No." he said finally, and there was something sad and wistful in his faint, crooked smile. "No I don't." He looked down at his hands thoughtfully. His answer felt open-ended, like there was more to be said, but the big old mech was silent.

"Why? Never found the right person?"

Ironhide scratched at the back of his helm with one large black hand. "Naw…always had the right girl." He kicked back a little in his seat and stared into space. "Just never found the right time." He sighed, regret lining his face. Frenzy kept staring at the old Autobot inquisitively, and the whole room felt heavy and uncomfortable in the silence.

"Why the frag are we watching this crap?" Frenzy asked suddenly, gesturing to the cooking show on TV.

Ironhide handed Frenzy the remote. "Here. Put whatever you want on. I'm going to go find you something."

As Ironhide busied himself getting Frenzy's energon, the Mini-Cassette cruised through the channels absently, finally deciding on _Gunsmoke_. When Ironhide walked back over he had a cube of energon in one hand, and a datapad in the other. He handed Frenzy the cube and watched as the Cassetticon gulped it all down then made a face.

"Fraggin' stuff tastes like warmed -over slag."

"Here," the Autobot grunted, pushing the datapad into the Decepticon's hands.

"What the hell is this?"

"First Aid was gonna give it to ya. Time for you to start doin' yer homework kid."

Frenzy examined the datapad skeptically. "Tiny Transistors: A Manual on Sparkling Maintenance for Creators Scout-Class and Smaller?" He looked at Ironhide. "What the hell?"

The large red Autobot gestured back to the pad. "Go on, get goin'. Two and a half, three weeks, you're not gonna have time to play catch-up. You gotta a lotta stuff ta learn, and not nearly enough time ta do it in."

Frenzy frowned at the datapad, and much to Ironhide's surprise, started reading.

A few minutes later the doors to the Med Bay whooshed open and First Aid entered carrying something that looked like a spiky half-ball under one arm. He paused at the sight of Frenzy rigidly engrossed in a datapad. He glanced at Ironhide who gave the doctor a sly, little smile. First Aid nodded and flashed the old mech a surreptitious thumbs up.

"How are you feeling Frenzy?" First Aid asked pleasantly as he approached.

The Decepticon sighed loudly glared at the doctor. "Well, I purged into a box, and the little slagger's having a kicking fit, and if one more 'Bot asks me how I'm feeling again I must just have to fuckin' have a kicking fit too."

Nodding genially, First Aid put the spiky…thing…on a nearby workstation. "That's good." He murmured.

Frenzy groaned and collapsed melodramatically onto the examining table. "Why me?" he moaned. Ironhide chuckled to himself, earning from Frenzy the one-fingered-salute.

"What were you reading?" First Aid asked as he started a scan of Frenzy's chest.

Glancing at the datapad he was still holding, Frenzy shrugged. "It's better than the stupid cowboy crap."

"What is it?"

"You fraggin' know what it is. You're the one who gave it to Ironhide to gimme." Frenzy sounded annoyed.

"Did you find anything that confused you? Are you understanding it alright?" First Aid put his scanner away and prepared an energon line.

"I just started it. And it's not fraggin' astroscience." Frenzy muttered.

First Aid nodded as he connected the energon line to Frenzy's chest. "Yes, well, if you have any questions…"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah…" the Mini-Cassette mumbled. "I get the slaggin' picture."

Setting his shoulders, First Aid's voice took on a more serious tone. "I'm glad you're reading about these things Frenzy…but there's another datapad I probably should have given you first."

"Yeah?" Frenzy stirred nervously.

First Aid reached into his ever-present container and drew out a smaller datapad. "It took me a while to find it. I had to get the information transferred from Cybertron." He handed the datapad to the Decepticon. "I realize some of the medical jargon might be outside your programming…"

"Technical Guidebook of Common Mechanical Failures in the Preterm Protoform." Frenzy's voice was flat and dark. Ironhide leaned forward.

"I've put a mark next to the most important sections," First Aid explained. "I just want you to be prepared."

"Prepared for what?" Frenzy spat, drumming his fingers on the datapad.

First Aid sighed gently. "Your sparkling, Frenzy, it's…it's still not growing like I'd want it to. Your systems are taking everything they can to build it, and they're showing the strain. I think we're going to have to resign ourselves to expecting an undersized sparkling."

"You already told me it was going to be small." There was a bite of accusation in Frenzy's words.

"Yes, I know. But not this small." First Aid answered carefully, "The smaller a sparkling is, the more likely it is to suffer a system failure, especially soon after delivery. If the processor is not developed enough to fine tune the delicate balance between the different fuel, sensory, and electrical systems…it can all go downhill very fast. Right now your sparkling's condition is being maintained by your body, but when it's delivered it won't have that support."

"So it'll die?" Frenzy fumed. Ironhide found himself standing without really knowing why. Unable to remain a still he awkwardly walked over to a nearby workstation and pretended to log onto Teletraan.

"No," First Aid soothed, "Not unless something goes very wrong. I'm just telling you that your sparkling will likely spend its first few weeks of life here in Med Bay. Wheeljack and Perceptor have built a special support berth to for it. It will monitor the sparkling closely at all times and keep its systems stable."

"Will it have to?" Frenzy frowned. "Like, definitely."

"There's a chance that it will be stable enough to be released earlier. But, like I said, I just wanted you to be prepared, to know the odds. Deactivation rate _is_ much higher for smaller sparklings…but we're doing everything we can, and so far," First Aids voice took a lighter note, "so far it seems strong."

Frenzy was frowning. The Protectobot patted his patient's arm before turning to prepare another nanite injection. Ironhide gave the pair a long glance over his shoulder, tapping his fingers on the keys absently.

"I don't want you to worry." First Aid added. "Leave that to the professionals. And I have good news for you too."

"'Bout fraggin' time." Frenzy sat up.

"Optimus Prime has given his permission to have me take you around Headquarters."

"Really! When?" Frenzy asked, practically vibrating with excitement.

The Autobot Doctor waggled a finger. "After you've gotten a good long recharge. That's what _this_ is for." He picked up the spiky thing. "This helmet has been Wheeljack's pet project for a while now, but he's modified it just for you."

The Decepticon stared at the spiky mechanical helmet skeptically. "Uh-huh….and what's the stupid thing supposed ta do?"

Ironhide was curious enough to walk back over to Frenzy's berth.

"It's supposed to tap into your processor's mental impulses and more directly control the programming that directs your recharge cycle."

The Decepticon studied the helmet suspiciously. "The hell…" he mumbled.

"It'll help you fall asleep, and stay asleep." First Aid offered helpfully.

"Pit, I knew that." Frenzy snapped. He gestured to the helmet and lay back down. "Well go on then. I been tired since I woke up."

First Aid put the helmet over the Mini-Cassettes helm and turned it on. The thing hummed faintly, but in a calming way. First Aid started going over the different monitors. "Just try and relax." He said softly, "We should know if it's working—"

"Uhh doc..." Ironhide interrupted softly.

First Aid looked down at his patient, who was already in recharge. The Protectobot watched for a while, lost in thought, before rubbing his faceplates thoughtfully.

"Now Ironhide, I was wondering if you would be able to help me with something?" He started finally, his voice hushed but not anxious.

The old mech nodded. "Sure Aid, anything."

First Aid cheerfully gestured the Security 'Bot over to a terminal. "Good. I thought you might."

***

Prime went over the information in the datapad solemnly, keeping his focus despite his feelings. Prowl and Red Alert had, at Optimus' request, compiled data on every known sighting of Frenzy since they'd awoken on Earth. Every battle, every skirmish the young Decepticon had participated in, and the amount of damage and number of casualties the fighting had inflicted. Prime had to prepare his request for the humans. Though the Autobots had diplomatic autonomy within their own base Optimus needed permission from the human governments before he could let Frenzy leave Headquarters. He needed to prove that the Decepticon would not pose a threat, and to do that he had to know everything that the little Mini-Cassette had done.

Thankfully, it was a rather short list. Frenzy had only been involved in a few large battles on Earth, and almost always in a supporting function. The skirmish over the Negivator had thankfully caused no human casualties; and, according to the reports of Hound and Skyfire, Frenzy had only served as a guard during that business with the oil tankers. Frenzy was present during the incident with the Chrysler Building, and was even directly responsible for some of the damage to Central Park; but there was hardly a Decepticon on Earth that hadn't been involved in that one. Though there'd been many casualties during that whole mess, Frenzy's part in it had been relatively small.

It was the Nightbird tragedy that was going to be the trouble. _Why, of all battles, did Frenzy have to be there_? he thought glumly. The vicious surprise attack on the crowded auditorium had killed a number of the world's top scientists and wounded many others, even though most of the Autobots, including Optimus Prime, had been on hand to guard Dr. Fujiama's invention. The world had never really forgiven him for that one. He hadn't either.

Optimus rubbed his optics, the whole battle playing in his memory banks. Rumble and Frenzy led the assault. Rumble shook the floors while Frenzy and Laserbeak fired into the panicked crowd, which eventually stampeded. Thankfully most of the humans got out of the building before the roof caved in; those that weren't trampled, or crushed by debris, or shot. Optimus knew that several human witnesses would be able to place the Mini-Cassette at the scene.

Sighing deeply Optimus made a mental list of favors he would have to call in; humans he knew would be able to spin things in his favor. Dr. Fujiama would make good starters. And there were many mayors, governors, and businessmen that owed him. Optimus had learned the grim fact long ago, you get enough powerful voices on your side and right and wrong could disappear.

Not that Prime thought he was doing anything wrong. He wasn't intending on letting Frenzy out of Headquarters for some time, and whatever the Decepticon had done in the past Optimus didn't feel he had the right to deny the young Cassetticon a second chance. He'd already failed him in so many ways.

_Stop that._ Prime chided himself. _That kind of thinking isn't going to get anything done._ The Autobot leader got up and fetched himself a cube of energon, wondering how much guilt and sympathy he was going to have to feel before his conscience was satisfied.

Sitting back down he thought long and hard about the morning they'd captured Frenzy. Prime had seen Frenzy's crazed look, seen the raised piledriver. He had no doubt that if he'd arrived a few seconds later Frenzy would have had human blood on his servos. The young mech who, according to Ironhide, enjoyed watching wrestling and cowboy shows and often rested his hand over his chest while he was resting, would have gleefully massacred an entire family. If they'd been a few seconds later.

_I've failed him._ Prime thought again, and was too deep in his reverie to banish the thought. Rumble and Frenzy had been created after Optimus had become leader of the Autobots. After he'd been given the Matrix of Leadership which, in theory, made him leader of all Cybertronians. The fact that the Decepticons rejected his leadership didn't make Optimus feel less responsible for them.

Frenzy was part of a generation of Decepticons that was never given a choice, born and raised into a rebellion that far preceeded them. A generation lost to war, abuse, and madness. _They're even turning on each other._ Prime thought darkly. _Destroying their own sparklings._ Optimus felt a strange twisting in his spark when he thought of what Frenzy had said about Megatron, about never recharging alone…the Autobot leader wondered what haunted the Decepticon's dreams. A pang of remorse perhaps? Or just a devouring loneliness in a mech too twisted to reach out in any other way. The anger rising again, Prime shook his head, banishing Megatron from his thoughts.

Optimus picked up another datapad, glancing at it. Red Alert was requesting a meeting, again. Something with the security cameras. Prime sighed, putting the datapad aside to pick up another. This one lightened his heart somewhat. Bumblebee was requesting permission to get some gifts together for Frenzy's new quarters. The little scout's kindheartedness was touching, though Prime knew not all the Autobots would be as friendly to their new addition. Still, Prime didn't hesitate to grant the request.

As he went over the next datapad Optimus' eyes softened. It was a list of medical supplies First Aid had marked as 'need urgently'; more nanites, special energon formulas, and at the bottom a whole new set of medical tools, in sizes way smaller and more delicate than anything they had now, tools to use on a sparkling.

Optimus buried his face in his palm dejectedly. This never should have happened to him. What has this war done to us? The first sparkling I'll see in five million years…coming into the universe under such circumstances. The offspring of Megatron and a mech too young and immature to know any better, that only through sheer chance escaped termination. Prime wondered what it said about them as a race. What it said about him as a leader. What it said about just how far the Decepticons had fallen.

They're destroying their own children.

Prime sat in silence for a moment longer, his bleak thoughts echoing in his processor. After several failed attempts to pull himself out of his dizzying drop into his own heart of darkness he reached out to his guiding thought. The one voice in the universe that not only approached him as an equal, but had the audacity to think that it could command him if need be. He let it command him now.

_Stop that._ The memory of her voice said in his mind. _You don't have to carry the weight of the entire universe inside yourself alone and silently. Tell someone. Let me help you. Don't you let yourself go off and brood by yourself on the moon or something, Optimus. Talk to me._

Sighing softly Optimus keyed into his workstation. He paused only a moment to encrypt the files before beginning his message.

Elita.

I hope this message finds you safe, and operating at optimum. As for myself, well…

I'm sure Chromia has told you about our new addition to the security wing…


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: Heh…what's it been, over a month. *FAIL* Sorry folks, but life kicked my trash pretty bad for a while. But now it's LENT and I've given up NOT WRITING (and soda.) Thus I give you the LONGEST CHAPTER YET for your patience (like you had a choice.)

The more you comment the faster I write. It's a scientific fact. E=mc squared and whatnot.

____

"And here's the main refueling bay. Hoist, or one'a the other docs I guess, will set your fuel number up for you. You can come get it when you need it. Most of us have to use some of our credit if we want extra…but…uhh…I guess you might wanna ask First Aid about that one. I don't know if it applies to you." Bumblebee waved at Smokescreen who was sitting next to the energon pump, cube in hand. The Autobot Datsun waved back affably, but didn't say anything either to Bumblebee or the newcomer he was showing around base.

"Credit?" Frenzy asked, staring carefully around the room from the huge entrance, but avoiding the gaze of the Autobot inside it. He stretched out a kink in his shoulder, feeling more awake than he had in weeks. Whatever that stupid machine had done, Frenzy had managed his first real good deep sleep in ages. The only side affect seemed to be a weird tenseness that he'd woken up with. Like his whole body had been held rigid with the effort of resting.

"Yeah. Trailbreaker likes to call them Robot Points." Bumblebee smiled. "You get a certain allowance of them every month, plus you can earn more by taking extra shifts, going on longer patrols, community service and things like that. You can turn 'em in for extra stuff around here, or for human money to buy things from them."

"As long as what you buy is legal." Smokescreen added, standing up with his empty cube. "And doesn't reflect poorly on the Autobots as a whole."

Frenzy nodded, and filed the information away as things he didn't really care about or need to know.

"There's a few other smaller refueling stations around base. One close to the exit, one close to the Motor Pool, obviously one in the Med Bay…and a couple others. But this is the only Fill-up with places to sit." Bumblebee continued. Smokescreen left the Fill-up quietly, giving the Decepticon a faintly kind smile and as much space as he could manage as he passed them in the doorway.

Bumblebee took a step closer to his charge, and looked over his shoulder at Ironhide who was lingering pretty far down the hallway, leaning against the bright orange wall with his arms crossed over his windshield. "Do you have any questions Frenzy?" the little yellow scout said with almost forced brightness.

"Where do you get High-Grade?" The Mini-Cassette asked, still scoping out the room.

"_You_ don' get et anywhere, not for a long time." Ironhide cut in firmly. "Not 'til you've earned it." Frenzy glared down the hall at the tall red mech.

"Let's move on shall we?" Bumblebee chirped. Frenzy shrugged and wandered after the yellow Minibot. He craned his head at every doorway they passed, but every room looked the same, and lots of them looked pretty empty. Plus, Ironhide was watching him like a hunter-seeker robot, so he didn't want to seem too interested.

He'd been a little surprised when Bumblebee had shown up to give the tour. The Yellow Scout was the first Autobot other than Optimus, Ironhide, and medical staff that the Mini-cassette had been introduced to in…uh…his new situation. Though Frenzy had decided pretty early on to despise the overly-friendly, perky little bot, he was having a hard time sustaining it. He was chalking it up to the fact that the 'Bot was only a head taller than him. Frenzy was getting pretty tired of everyone stooping to talk to him like he was some stunted youngling, and it was nice to have someone closer to his own size leading him around.

They passed Wheeljack in the hallway. The Autobot Scientist gave all three mechs a kind nod, and gave Frenzy an extra long look, as if gleaning for information. He didn't stop to chat, but slowed long enough to give Ironhide a questioning look while pointing at Frenzy behind the little Cassetticon's back. Ironhide only shrugged. He was there to make sure no one got in trouble, not to comment on the situation. Bumblebee paused for a moment to point down a hallway.

"Further on this way is Hanger Deck C, most of it has been converted into a geothermal power station. We get most of our energy by tapping into the volcano itself."

"So _that's_ why your energon takes like sludge laced with slag." Frenzy shifted his weight from one foot to the other, trying to alleviate a niggling ache where his rearranged internals where grating against his backbone infrastructure.

"Heh, don't worry. You get used to it." Bumblebee answered reassuringly. He moved closer to the Cassette, "You're not getting tired are you? First Aid was very clear that if you get tired we should probably finish later."

"I'm fine." Frenzy snapped. "So let's get on with it."

Giving the monitor on Frenzy's chest another glance Bumblebee nodded. "Okay then. Just let me…"

"I know, I know, just let you know." Frenzy muttered shifting again, this time with impatience. So far he hadn't seen anything on his list. He didn't even know where that stupid Telatrain of theirs was. Being led around the enemy's base, by the enemy…the whole situation was more than surreal, like walking through a lie.

"This hall leads to some of the old cargo holds. Most are still used for storage, but Cargo Hold A is a training room, though we usually do most of that stuff outside. Cargo F is where Skids….uh…nevermind." Bumblebee quickened his pace for a few steps, but Frenzy had already stopped at the end of the hall.

"What? What is Cargo F for now?"

Ironhide dropped his face into his hand. Bumblebee gave a nervous laugh. "I…uh…I had forgotten …I meant to say Cargo D, which is used to store personal items we don't use every day. I'm sure you'll get a locker in Cargo D eventually, but I thought I would wait until then to show it to you is all. You know. No use covering more than we have to."

Frenzy was a bad liar, and he knew another bad liar when he saw one. "What's in cargo F?"

"There is no cargo F." Bumblebee chirped as he turned and started trying to lead Frenzy away.

"But Skids is what's in…"

"There is no Cargo F." Ironhide rumbled. "There is no Skids."

"Now, don't you want to see the Control Room?" Bumblebee asked brightly, and Frenzy was too excited by the concept of finally laying eyes on the mysterious Telatron that he filed Cargo F away under things to examine later. He was eager enough that he only slightly registered the disdainfully suspicious glare that Sideswipe shot his way as they passed the Red Lamborghini in the hall. As the Autobot Warrior met up with Tracks further on down he gestured back at the Decepticon, his guard, and his tour guide.

"I'm telling you, this is a huge mistake." He whispered forcefully.

Tracks shrugged. "Look, I'm staying out of it. It may not end well, but I'm not going to be the one to second guess Prime."

"Here's the Control Room." Bumblebee chirped as they entered a large room at the end of the hall. "Kinda the central processing station for everything that goes on around here."

Frenzy peered around the huge orange room, which was empty except for Jazz running calculations on the supercomputer. The Mini-Cassette was trying to get his bearings. The whole fraggin' place was confusing, every room looked kinda the same, and each room somehow looked a little different each time he looked at it. But Frenzy quickly picked out the massive computer taking up a good chunk of the far wall.

"Is that…"  
"Teletraan One." Bumblebee confirmed proudly. "Of course, you can access a lot of it from the secondary terminals around Headquarters. But that right there is where it really is. Usage is by appointment only. We used to watch TV on it until we moved an old screen from storage into the Motor Pool."

"Over there is the old Bridge, most of those panels were pretty well busted during the crash. We've moved most of the broken workstations out. And I think that the chairs were snatched for the Motor Pool and Fill-up."

Ironhide wandered over to the area dominated by broken portholes and hanging stalactites. "I'd almost forgotten that stuff used to be here." He mumbled. "Nothin' much to show for it anymore."

Frenzy suddenly realized that somewhere in this room he had been folded up in stasis for four million years. He stared way up at the ceiling, which looked like it had been mostly repaired…except for the large rocks that had stabbed their way through over the eons. Growing slowly through the cracks, a grain of rock at a time. _Four million years._

His sparkling suddenly kicked him, possibly outraged that he was standing still. And for the first time in his life Frenzy almost felt old. Almost. He looked around the room, impatient again. This whole thing was making him feel twitchy.

He wandered closer to Teletraan One, each step a little more confident since it didn't seem like anyone was going to stop him. He stared up at the Porsche who was still working away, trying to see which buttons he was pushing and what he was doing. The black and white Autobot looked down at him and smiled kindly. Frenzy had a sudden urge to punch him in the knee.

"Heya there Frenzy. You enjoyin your tour?" Jazz asked.

Frenzy shrugged, now in the mood to be sullen. _Everybody knows, _he thought, _stupid slaggers, gonna treat me like some sick little Bumble-puppy. _It didn't help when Jazz instantly confirmed it.

"You feelin' alright?"

The Decepticon glared and bit back some seriously delicious insults. _The more they pity you the more they'll trust you. _"Yeah." He muttered, swallowing back as much sarcasm as he could. "Just Prime."

Jazz's smile dropped for a split second. He glanced around for Ironhide and found him pretending to examine a stalactite just out of Frenzy's optic range. Jazz knew he was watching them. His smile returned smoothly, "Seen your new digs yet?"

Frenzy cocked his head to one side. "Digs?"

"Yeah, you know, your new quarters?"

"I--" He turned to look for Ironhide and found Bumblebee standing nearby. "I get my own room?" he asked, a little stunned.

"Of course!" Bumblebee answered. "And a real nice room too, bigger than mine! Officer's quarters infact. Cuz…well, I mean…" He chuckled a little nervously, "Of course it's gonna be more than just _you_ in there."

In the long, awkward silence that followed Frenzy tried his absolute hardest not to scratch at the front of his chest, where the sparkling's shifting had caused a weird, itchy feeling. The less they thought about that, the less Frenzy had to think about it too.

Eventually Jazz laughed deeply, waving away the discomforting pause like a sour note. "Well I'm sure you'll get to see your new pad soon. I'm gonna be in the Motor Pool later playing cards, if either of you want ta hang for a while."

"That sounds great Jazz!" Bumblebee nodded enthusiastically. "We'll see how the rest of the tour goes. Maybe we'll meet you there."

"Sure thing Bumblebee."

Frenzy sighed. Autobots or Decepticons, everyone always talked above his head like he wasn't there. _It's not like I'm slaggin' Ravage! I can talk for myself. _

Suddenly a loud, beeping alarm blared through the Control Room. Teletraan One's screen flashed a neon Autobot insignia and several of the buttons on the controls began blinking in different colors. Frenzy watched in intense interest as Ironhide rushed over to the terminal. The large red Autobot began pressing buttons confidently, despite the fact that none of them were marked. The Autobot insignia was replaced with pictures and symbols.

"What is it?" Bumblebee asked. "Decepticons?"

Frenzy's interest quadrupled.

"Naw…" Ironhide answered. "Volcanic eruption in Hawaii." Frenzy was bored again.

Optimus Prime rolled into the Control Room and transformed. He took note of Frenzy and gave the Mini-Cassette a quick smile before approaching Teletraan. "What's the situation Ironhide?"

"Natural disaster in Hawaii, Prime. They're askin' fer some assistance in evacuation and maybe containin' the lava flow."

Optimus examined the screen. "Hmmm...it seems that the humans in Hawaii would be able to take care of this on their own. Still, we must do what we can to foster goodwill with the people of Earth."

Frenzy had to stifle a snort of derision; luckily no one was really noticing him. He edged his way closer to a mysterious closed door that seemed to be newer than the rest of the room. _Superweapons are usually behind closed doors. _He inched nearer to the towering doorway, quiet as a scream in space.

"And the United States government in particular, eh Prime?" Jazz quipped knowingly. "Seeing as how we have our spaceship wrecked in one'a their National Parks."

Bumblebee laughed. "Not very fair of you Prime, being nicer to the neighbors that are closest."

He was only a few feet from the door. He stopped to stand very still when he saw Ironhide straighten up suddenly. But the big mech didn't turn around. The Decepticon was reaching for the door controls oh so slowly, oh so carefully, then he felt a sharp, hard kick which sent achy, tickly vibrations all the way through his laser core. He glared down at his chest. _Not now you!_

Optimus was tapping away at Teletraan. "How about being nicer to the neighbors who are providing us with patents, grants, and large amounts of human currency for our 'goodwill efforts.'"

"He's got a point there Bumblebee." Jazz smirked.

"Who should we send?" Ironhide wondered. "The Protectobots?"

Prime shook his head. "I don't think that's really a good idea right now." He said cautiously, his voice hushed. He turned to look toward the Cassetticon.

Frenzy's fingers were nearly to the door's lowest controls.

"Kid!" Ironhide barked sharply. Frenzy pulled his hand back, and turned around, a little bashfully.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Ironhide warned.

"Slag! I…I was just…you know…curious." The Mini-cassette mumbled.

"You wanna know what's behind that door?" Jazz asked, grinning.

Frenzy nodded firmly, already getting angry at the Autobot's teasing tone.

"Dinobots." Jazz trumpeted. Bumblebee laughed as Frenzy sidled his was from the door nervously.

"Aww…they're not that bad once you get to know them." The yellow Scout chirped.

"Already fraggin' met them." Frenzy clipped shortly. "_Don't_ wanna meet them again."

"Hmm…" Optimus held the corner of his mouthplate. "Dinobots… now there's an idea." He turned back to Teletraan One. "What do you think?" He asked Ironhide

Ironhide shrugged, only giving Optimus the corner of his optic so he could watch Frenzy, who was shuffling around, avoiding looking at the extremely dangerous door and pretending he didn't know he was being watched. "Sounds good to me. They can fly over there. They might even be able to contain some of the eruption, but they wouldn't be much in the way of crowd control."

"You're right. I'll send Powerglide with them."

"Awww…now that's kinda mean." Ironhide shot Prime his crooked, half smile.

"To who? Powerglide or the Dinobots?"

"Both, Prime."

Optimus chuckled softly. "It'll be good for them." He glanced at the door to the Dinobot Cave. "I suppose I should send them on their way then." He said giving Ironhide a meaningful look. Ironhide nodded.

"And we should be finishin' our tour." Ironhide said loudly turning to the rest of the mechs in the room. "Before our guest here wears himself out and First Aid has to come hunt us down."

Frenzy glared.

Bumblebee nodded and started leading them out. "I'll show you your new room real quick. Then, if you're feeling up to it, we can head over to the Motor Pool to meet the guys." He started brightly.

Ironhide shook his head sadly as he brought up the rear of the small group. Frenzy was making rude gestures behind Bumblebee's back.

Optimus watched as they left, giving himself a moment's rest before he opened the Dinobot Cave. Grimlock hated being sent on 'goodwill' missions, and Prime wasn't really relishing the upcoming childish power struggle that always preceded the Dinobots doing what he asked. He knew it would take some serious cajoling, and perhaps a little trickery, to get them going. To top all that off he had a meeting with Red Alert later.

_Red Alert and the Dinobots in one day?_ Prime thought with a sigh. He felt no real anger at his warriors themselves, they couldn't help how they'd been programmed, still…

He had a feeling that this day was going to wear his usually inexhaustible patience very thin.

***

Frenzy stared up at the huge orange door. It was easily tall enough for Optimus Prime to get through, but then, most of the doorways around here were. He looked up and down the long hallway, lined with similar doorways, then to the tall red mech standing close behind him. Bumblebee was at his side gesturing to the door's controls.

"See. They moved them down for you! Grapple just got that done earlier today. Of course." Bumblebee laughed. "They had to do the same thing for mine. I just got tired of having to reach way up to hit the buttons. Brawn and Windcharger got theirs moved too. I think most of the Mini-Bots had theirs lowered." Bumblebee cocked his head to one side. "Except for Cliffjumper for some reason…"

Frenzy sighed and gave Ironhide a long-suffering glance. If Bumblebee noticed, he didn't let on.

"Go on kid." Ironhide coaxed, gesturing to the controls. "Take a look."

The Decepticon really didn't think he wanted to, despite his curiosity. This wouldn't get him any closer to finding that stupid chip, or Immobilthingy, or whatever. Still, it didn't seem like there was any easy way to get out of it. So he pushed the button on the door's controls.

"Oh! Hexagonal Nuts!" cried a gravelly dour voice from within. "I told you! I've seen defunct Arkadroids roll up-hill faster than you put that berth together!"

"We'll I'm sorry that someone around here had the artistic integrity to want the job done right." Snapped another voice, dripping with miserable dissatisfaction."

"I told you this would happen." Whined another, his adenoidal tones somehow sounding both nervous and resigned.

"Shut up, Huffer!" hissed the second voice.

Frenzy couldn't really get a good look at his new quarters, because as far as he could tell it was full of Autobots, who were practically scraping their paint off rubbing elbows as they worked in the relatively cramped space. Hound turned from where he was setting something up in the corner and shrugged helplessly at Bumblebee.

"Sorry little pal. We really tried." The green Jeep said with a sheepish smile.

The little yellow scout laughed, but half-heartedly, and gave Frenzy a sideways glance. "Guess I should have showed you Cargo F after all."

"Bumblebee!" Several of them cried or hissed at varying levels of anger.

The Mini-Cassette cocked his head. "But you said…"

"There IS no Cargo F." The room intoned, almost in unison. Before Frenzy could react, Grapple straightened up from where he had been crouched in the same corner as Hound, brushing his hands off. A faint satisfied smile danced on the engineer's mouth.

"Well." He puffed. "I'm finished now. The finest berth of its type I've ever constructed. Of course, I had to heavily modify Wheeljack's designs." He threw his welding arm into the air melodramatically. "The scientist has no sense of aesthetics." He moved toward the door, looking down at Frenzy as the Mini-Cassette inched sideways to let him pass. "Try not to smash it, if you would be so kind." He huffed, gently, as he left the room.

The departure of the huge engineer cleared the room out considerably, and Frenzy finally felt almost comfortable inching inside. Though he got a little nervous when Ironhide moved to take up most of the doorway. Now he was trapped in a room with several Autobots. And not just any Autobots. Some of the most _annoying_ Autobots.

Huffer seemed busy with Gears in one corner setting up some kind of strange boxy machine. Hound was taking up most of the other corner, obscuring whatever he was working on.

Bumblebee walked right up next to Frenzy and clapped him on the back, rather gently. "Sorry Frenzy. I was hoping they would be out of here by the time we got here. Still, I supposed there was a lot of stuff to get together."

"You're telling me." Gears muttered from the corner. "You know how hard it was to get those pipes routed into here?" Hound made a nose like a human cough, rather sharply. Gears clammed up again with a resounding "Humphf."

"See." Bumblebee pointed. "Here's your berth. It might be a little bit big, since it's Mini-Bot sized, but it should be low enough." Frenzy glanced at the recharging berth in one corner. Then blinked again.

"You guy's painted the walls?" he asked, looking around at the new pale brownish colored walls and ceiling.

Hound looked over his shoulder and shrugged. "Actually it's a hologram program. First Aid told me that you didn't really like orange."

"Damn skippy." Frenzy spat with a grin. Hound smiled back.

Gears stood up slowly, and rubbed his back melodramatically. "Energon processor's done. Finally. My backbone infrastructure is killing me."

The power of suggestion reminded Frenzy of how his own back was aching, and his sides, and his front and—

Damn. He really hated Gears more than any other Autobot right now. And he let him know with a surly glare. The Mini-bot noticed, but had given enough surly glares in his day not to take it personally.

Huffer stared at the machine impassively. "We haven't had a chance to test it. We'll probably be in here fixing it every astrohour for the next jour."

"What's it for?" Frenzy asked, trying to peer around them.

"Why, it's an energon processor, obviously, to process energon." Gears grunted. He coughed into his hand. "You know, for the sparkling."

"Hopefully." Huffer mumbled mournfully. Gears kicked him a little.

"How you're gonna do it I don't know." Gears sighed. "You ever seen sparklings?" He didn't wait for Frenzy to answer. "They're noisy, troublesome little things. Always scrambling all over the place and getting into trouble." He gestured widely, frowning, but his eyes glowing almost happily. "Of course, that's after their youngling plating comes in. Before that they're almost helpless. Vocaliser's only used for nonverbal alarms, logic centers still only half online. Can't tell a power socket from a computer terminal."

Huffer started gathering up his tools. "That's only the best case scenario." The Mini-Bot engineer whined softly. Gears kicked him again, harder. Hound coughed loudly. Frenzy stared around the room, too overwhelmed and annoyed to pay attention anymore.

"Well." Said Hound, a little forcefully. "I think we're done here." He nodded at Gears and Huffer meaningfully. "It was nice to meet you finally Frenzy." He said kindly. "I hope you like your new room." Frenzy turned to watch the three Autobots leave, not bothering to hide his deep relief, before he turned back to look at what Hound had been working on.

He took a few steps closer to the corner of the room, not really sure what he was looking at. But for some reason this corner of the room had pale blue walls instead of brown. He stared at them quizzically. Then at the thing which filled most of the corner.

"Cute. Isn't it?" Bumblebee asked, smiling gently. "They spent hours putting it together."

_What the slag? It's a box._ Frenzy thought. _Just a little box._ As he approached it he slowly realized that it was more than a box. It was a tiny berth. He walked right up next to the tiny silver berth with raised edges and looked down into the bottom of it. It came up a little higher than his waist, with an inside that looked like foam rubber. There was a simple monitor above the head of it. Like what was above most berths.

"See, it's even got a thermal regulator." Bumblebee added, "And alarms to tell you if the sparkling is awake, or too cold, or trying to climb out."

Frenzy could only stare at it. The room was silent for a long time, but the Mini-Cassette hardly registered it. It wasn't until he felt a large hand on his shoulder that he snapped out of his thoughtless reverie.

"Ya okay kid?" Ironhide asked.

Frenzy thought about shrugging the hand off for a second but instead he let his eyes trail up to the shelves installed above the sparkling berth. "What's on those?" He asked, pointing.

Bumblebee sprang to action again. "Sparkling care items mostly. Detailing equipment, fuel additives, a few toys."

"Toys?"

Grinning proudly Bumblebee started pulling a few items off the shelf. "Yeah, Wheeljack and Perceptor built most of em, old Cybertronian designs, with some modifications of course. They're supposed to activate and develop programming. Stimulus-Response kinda stuff." He held out a rounded cube shape thing with multiple colored buttons with symbols on them. "This lights up and makes noises. It's supposed to train the optic sensors to recognize the energy carried in different wavelengths of light."

He handed it to Frenzy who pushed a green button and listened to a low binary beeping. His sparkling shifted a little and Frenzy frowned at the cube. Then at his chest. _Toys?_ He thought, _I'm gonna have to give the slagger toys?_ He drummed his fingers on the cube and thought. _Maybe if I take the detonators out of some of those old landmines... They light up and make noise._

"Hound's especially proud of this one." Bumblebee chirped reaching up to a tiny box on the shelf and pressing a button. The space above the berth danced to life with tiny buzzing spheres that morphed in and out of each other, forming clumps and clusters. Pushing another button on the box made a gentle, light, rhythmic music of sorts accompany the spheres. "It's a holographic mobile of elementary atomic physics. See, here we have the covalent bonding of carbon with halogens, with rhythms corresponding to the energy levels of the bonding electron pairs."

"Uh-huh…" Frenzy stared around the little corner nervously. Especially all the soft, rounded, bright things in it. He looked down into the little empty berth again, feeling suddenly very tired and a little sick. Ironhide seemed to notice and watched the Deception carefully.

"What do you think of it?" Bumblebee asked.

Frenzy shrugged. "It's okay." He said absently, now staring around the whole room. Bigger berth, workstation, computer terminal, chair near the corner, energon processor, little blue corner, little silver berth. "I've never had a room to myself before."

The little yellow scout smiled with forced brightness and nodded.

"First time for everything, right?" he chirped.

There was a gentle knock outside the door. The three mechs turned to see Prowl standing politely in the hall. He smiled kindly at Frenzy and Bumblebee but there was a tightness around his optics.

"Yeah?" Ironhide asked.

"Optimus wants to see you, Ironhide. He says it's important."

Ironhide nodded. "Okay jus' lemme finish up here."

"I think it was a little urgent." Prowl arched a brow ridge.

Sighing deeply Ironhide turned to Frenzy and Bumblebee. He pointed to Bumblebee. "Don't let him tire himself out. Take him back to Med-bay when yer finished." He turned to waggle his finger at Frenzy "And you, no fighting, no mouthin' off, and no tirin' yourself out. Ya got plenty of time to wander around base later."

Frenzy sighed deeply and waved him off. "Whatever you say. Better go, your boyfriend's waiting."

Ironhide shook a cautionary finger at the Decepticon one more time before turning and following Prowl out.

The room was silent again for a moment after. The Bumblebee clapped his hands together with a clang. "Well, how're you feeling?"

Frenzy let out an anguished groan of frustration before hastily regaining his composure. "Fine as fraggin' finials. Now what?"

"Up to checking out the Motor Pool?" Bumblebee asked.

"Sure." Frenzy chirped mockingly. "I'll lead us in a sing-along of 'Make New Friends, Upgrade the Old.'"

Bumblebee laughed loudly. "Oh…it isn't THAT bad…except maybe when Beachcomber's in from patrol."

Right before he keyed the door shut Frenzy took one last look at the tiny blue corner of the room. The mobile, the shelves, the tiny berth. With a sigh he shut the door. Then turned to follow Bumblebee down the hall, his thoughts as jumbled and tired as his chassis.

_Well fuck..._


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: Not quite as long as last week's update. Thanks to everyone who comments, alerts, and faves; y'all make me make little emoticons! See? ^.^

I'm on spring break next week, and writing is going to be my top priority. Let's see how much I can get done!

***

Frenzy glared rather glumly at his oversized cards, refusing to meet the eyes of any of the other mechs around the table. After much cajoling on Bumblebee's part he'd finally agreed to join in the game; but that didn't mean he had to like it. Especially when he was losing. And most especially when he was losing to that loser Warpath.

"Pow!" the red tank's cheered as he slapped four cards down in front of him. Frenzy squirmed on the box that was serving as an impromptu booster seat. Every time the damn retardicon shouted another one of his damn interjections the little fragger in his chest kicked him. Hard.

Across the table Trailbreaker laughed. "You've still got a long way to go 'til you've caught up with me!"

Bumblebee smiled and rearranged the cards in his hands then scrutinized them carefully. "Jazz?" He started, "Do you have any eights?"

Smirking a little sadly, Jazz tossed two cards over to Bumblebee who grinned and added them to his hand. Then he turned to Frenzy. "You got any eights?" He asked brightly.

"No." Frenzy said flatly.

"You're supposed to say, Zowie!, Go Fish!" Warpath commanded pleasantly. Frenzy grimaced, and changed his hold on his cards so he was surreptitiously flipping Warpath the bird.

There was a pause while Bumblebee's hand hovered over the deck, unsure whether to draw a card. He gave Frenzy a nervous smile, asking with his eyes.

Frenzy sighed. "Zowie. Go fish." He mumbled sarcastically. Bumblebee drew a card.

Trailbreaker laughed again, "Atta boy!" He joked as he slapped Frenzy hard on the back. Bumblebee and Jazz gasped, and across the room Hoist stood up suddenly from where he'd been watching TV.

"Slag…." Trailbreaker moaned sheepishly under his breath in the now too-quiet room. Everyone's eyes were on Frenzy.

The Mini-Cassette just shot the table a cocky grin, daring any of them to ask him if he was alright. He readjusted his cards and gave Trailbreaker his most innocent, lying face. "'S yer turn." he smirked.

"You okay kid?" Jazz asked quietly.

Frenzy snorted. "I been slapped around by better than this fragger." He jutted his thumb to the still embarrassed Trailbreaker. "I'm made'a metal, same as the rest'a you slagheads." Another long pause.

"Well…uh….in that case," Trailbreaker stammered, "You got any queens? Heh, Tough-guy?"

Glaring and drumming his fingers against his cards, Frenzy finally pulled one out of his hand and tossed it over to the huge black mech.

The game continued on rather uncomfortably. Each of the Autobots had a wide smile pasted on their faces, except for Warpath of course, but behind it was a kind of wary awkwardness. Every word they said tiptoed carefully, as if walking on a minefield. They laughed a little too loud at jokes that weren't really funny, and their optics kept darting to Frenzy and then away. Alternating between carefully gauging his reactions and not wanting to stare. Frenzy, for his part, was torn between the glee he felt when he flummoxed them, and the anger he felt at their pitying attention.

When the game finally ended, (Jazz won rather quietly,) no one suggested they play another hand. They were all too exhausted with the effort of the first. When it was obvious that no new hand would be dealt most of them, one by one, drifted over to the former deck chairs that circled the TV, though Warpath and Jazz stayed at the table. Jazz shuffled the cards repeatedly, each time growing more and more complex in his cutting, bridging, and folding in. Warpath picked up a chamois and became very involved in polishing his cannon.

Frenzy sat down in the lowest chair he could find, which was still several feet wider than he needed. He gazed at the TV lazily. It was one of those shows of bad recordings of squishies falling down, or those furry squishies they kept around them doing stupid stuff, or squishies falling down with the little furry squishies. Bumblebee and Trailbreaker began chatting with each other in their obnoxiously friendly, good-natured way, and though they left their conversation as open as possible, no one else seemed inclined to join. The Mini-Cassette sighed and drew his legs up to his chest rather stiffly, leaning his head on the tall backrest of the chair. _Rumble loves this show_, he thought, as he didn't bother to ignore the pinchy shifting going on inside him. Truth was, he was tired right down to the infrastructure, but a quick glance at his chest told him he was still lingering in the green, and he hated the thought of going back to being a patient in that Pit-spawned Medbay, with its slaggin'tiny, itty-bitty TV.

Lost in thought and clips of tripping humans Frenzy hardly noticed the green Maintenance bot get up and, fiddle around with the energon refill, and then pointedly take a seat in the chair next to him. He only noticed when Hoist slid the cube over to him with a meaningful look.

"Here." He said careful to keep his voice beneath Bumbebee's and Trailbreaker's, "You should have this now."

Frenzy picked up the cube rather listlessly staring at it with a blank expression. He sighed and took a long sip before making a face. He recognized the formula, super fortified, and it tasted like a lead pipe dipped in radium, but not in a good way.

"Did you see your room yet?" Hoist asked, voice still lower than the other conversation.

The Mini-Cassette shrugged and nodded.

"Did you see the sparkling berth Grapple put together for you?"

Finally turning to look at Hoist, Frenzy made a big show of shrugging again. "Yeah, why?"

"Grapple worked on it very hard, he may have acted a little…snippy. But I know he hopes you liked it."

"'S'okay." Frenzy looked back to the TV and took another sip.

During the pause that followed Hoist scooted closer to the Decepticon. Frenzy did his very best to ignore it, hoping that the stupid half-doc would get the drift.

"Has First Aid given you Tiny Transistors yet?" Hoist asked in that same infuriating low tone.

"Yeah." _Stare at the TV very hard. He'll leave you alone eventually._

"What did you think of it?"

Frenzy decided to pretend like he hadn't heard, even though there was no way on Cybertron that his audials could have fritzed that fast. The silence lengthened until the conversation was most definitely over. Finally Hoist stood with a sigh, looking down at the sitting Cassetticon very carefully.

"Take care of yourself Frenzy." He said softly, and the way he said it made it obvious that it was much more than just a pleasantry.

"Don' worry 'bout me." Frenzy mumbled, uncomfortable.

Hoist patted the Mini-Cassette's shoulder as he walked past his chair. "That's my job Frenzy." The blocky, green mech replied as he left the Motor Pool. Frenzy watched him go.

"Ha, that's right Trailbreaker! I thought that Ratchet and Wheeljack were going to blow a gasket when they saw what just one wrench dropped into the Teletraan console could do!" Bumblebee laughed. Frenzy's audials perked up, and he began listening very carefully while still apparently engrossed in the TV.

"Heh, took them forever to rewire the circuits leading to the World Energy Chip." Trailbreaker agreed.

_Bingo_! Frenzy thought. He couldn't believe his luck; though he had known that the Chip thing was probably somewhere close to Teletraan, now he was sure. All he had to do now was get himself alone with that computer…

Of course, when he did steal the chip, he didn't really have any way to escape. Frenzy frowned, how was he going to get out of here. He figured he could manage to hoof it out of the base itself, but he knew he wouldn't be able to walk all the way back to Decepticon Headquarters, even if he was feeling completely one-hundred percent.

_Someone's going to have to come get me…_

Frenzy smiled, and not at the fleshling female dressed in white who'd just fallen into a cake. _They're gonna have to come for me._

He leaned back, tired but happy. _They'll send someone back to check up on me eventually,_ he thought, _I can wait._ Inside himself, the sparkling twisted a little, not uncomfortably, as if settling down. Frenzy drummed his fingers on his chest contentedly.

***

Ironhide's arms were crossed across his chest as he watched the recording skeptically. On his right was Optimus Prime, on his left was First Aid. On Prime's right was Prowl. Standing beside the monitor was Red Alert, practically vibrating with frenetic anticipation.

"See!" the security director cried, pointing at the monitor, "Did you see that?"

Suppressing both an aggravated sigh and the urge to punch his fellow Security Bot, Ironhide turned to Optimus.

"Could you clarify?" Prowl asked.

"Red Alert, could you tell them what exactly we're looking at here?" Optimus said, and Ironhide noticed how thin his voice sounded.

"Surely you must be able to see it? Prowl at least?" Red Alert said as he rewound the recording. "Here we have the security camera in Frenzy's cell from fifteen days after his capture. He is recharging. Now watch this!" Red Alert pointed to the screen, right above Frenzy's head. "See how he twitches his head five millimeters to the right, and then two to the left? Now watch this!" he moved his finger till it was above Frenzy's midsection. "Exactly five-hundred-twenty seven astroseconds later he moves the third finger of his left hand two millimeters." Red Alert forwarded the recording. "Here is twelve days later! Watch as he moves his finger five millimeters right, two left, and then 527 astroseconds later the third finger of his left hand moves…" Red Alert paused, seemingly for emphasis, "two millimeters."

"So?" Ironhide growled. "What are you getting at Red?"

Ironhide knew he was in trouble when Red Alert grinned triumphantly. "Prowl!" he turned to the battle tactician, "What is the statistical probability of any mechanoid performing the same three actions for the same distance within the same time intervals, while in recharge cycle?"

Prowl considered for only half a second. "Though I would need more data to be exact…the probability is less than 2.3 in 10,000."

Red Alert gave a nearly predatory smile, "And what would be the chances of it happening three times?" he asked as he again forwarded the tape.

"Nearly nonexistent." Prowl answered.

"Well. Here we have it again. Almost an hour before Frenzy collapsed."

"Ironhide. It has to be a recording." Prime said gravely. Ironhide's arms dropped to his sides.

"What's more, during the time both before and after this canned recording, we have identical minor feedback spikes in the electrical systems directly surrounding Frenzy's cell. Minor enough not to trigger any alarms. But when I noticed the tapes…" Red Alert stared at the screen.

"Something was happening in that cell, something that someone didn't want us to see." Red Alert was almost talking to himself now. "We can only assume it was a Decepticon."

There was something deep in Ironhide that wanted to argue with Red Alert, but even deeper down he knew that the Lamborghini was right. At the very least someone had spied on Frenzy…at the worst…

"Prime?" Ironhide turned to the Autobot leader. Optimus shook his head, his shoulders were bowed, as if he was carrying something heavy but invisible on his back.

"I didn't want to take any action until I had spoken to you, Prowl, and especially First Aid." He said with sad determination. The four other mechs in the room all turned to look at the doctor.

"We can't throw him out." First Aid pleaded.

"No one is suggesting that." Optimus reassured. "I…" faltering for a moment he paused to gather himself, "I am unchanged in my desire to help Frenzy, but if our current course of action is putting the rest of the Autobots in danger…" he turned so he was staring at the screen again. "Insights, suggestions, anyone?"

"We don' know what happened." Ironhide pointed out, firmly. "We don' know who was there, if they talked to 'im, what he said back." He gestured at the screen. "For all we know he told 'em to go frag off."

Prowl nodded. "What happened directly after the last two recordings? Since we can perhaps assume that the first one was the original sequence recorded." he asked.

First Aid pondered. "Nothing that seemed out of the ordinary at the time. Though… that was aobut when he started sleeping nearly all of the time, without really recharging at all." The doctor tapped at his faceplates. "And after the second time… he crashed…" he stiffened, "Then he finally consented to talk to me."

"Exactly!" Red Alert pointed at the doctor excitedly. "His superiors must have told him to talk to us to gain our trust! We have a spy and possible saboteur in our midst!"

"We don't know that." Ironhide growled, giving each word the punch of emphasis.

Optimus pressed his fingers to his optics, "But we don't know that it isn't true, Ironhide." he reminded his friend darkly.

"Frenzy is my patient," First Aid started passionately, "and I can personally attest to how fragile he is right now. He's hardly in the condition to do much sabotage. He's walking a fine line just being up and around for a few hours. I won't let anyone do anything that might harm my patients. And it's not just him I'm worried about."

"I agree." Prowl said. "We can't do anything that might harm him."

Optimus nodded.

"But something must be done!" Red Alert cried.

"Yes." Prime agreed. He turned to First Aid. "Should one of us confront him about this?"

First Aid shook his head. "No." He was firm. "Not until after he delivers. I don't want anything more to stress him, I'm not exaggerating when I say the results could be deadly."

"But--" Red Alert started. Prime silenced him with a raised hand.

"As you wish First Aid." Prime approved. "No one here will confront him on what we've seen until after he's delivered." He gave the Security Director a stern glance. "Until that time I want him under constant surveillance, though he doesn't need to know about it. I want new cameras installed in the Med Bay. I want him kept there as much as possible. And if he is out I want either Ironhide, First Aid, or Prowl to accompany him at all times. Don't take your optic sensors off him for a nanoclick." He gave everyone in the room a long look. "This conversation is confidential, understood?"

The four other mechs nodded.

"If there's another camera glitch like this, we will have to confront him. But as Ironhide said, we don't know what happened while the cameras were being jammed. Keep both optics open, but let's give Frenzy the benefit of the doubt."

Red Alert seemed about to object, but Prime raised his hand to stop him.

"I've decided. We'll not rescind out trust in him, at least for now."

***

"So, here we are back at Med Bay." Bumblebee said; then made a big show of stretching. "I'm exhausted," he sighed with a smile.

Frenzy no longer had any energy left to be annoyed. So he just stared blankly.

"Did you have a good time hanging at the Motor Pool?" the yellow Mini-Bot asked. The Mini-Cassette shrugged.

"Beats sitting around Med Bay."

Smiling and nodding Bumblebee took a step closer to Frenzy, making the Decepticon very nervous. The Autobot scout put a hand on Frenzy's shoulder. His smile morphed into one a little more concerned and sympathetic, which only increased Frenzy's discomfort, it made the Cassetticon mad.

"I know this can't be easy for you." Bumblebee said gently. Frenzy sighed and debated pulling away, but something about the kindness extended from someone he once smashed in the face held him hypnotized. "I just wanted to let you know that, uh, if you… you know… needed anyone to talk to, and stuff, there's a lot of us here who just want to help."

"'Kay." Frenzy mumbled, staring at his feet, embarrassed at such a disgusting display of pity.

"Heh," Bumblebee was stumbling with the strangeness of the situation, but he just had to let the Mini-Cassette know how much he, and everyone else, was pulling for him. "You know, I…I really can't wait to meet the little guy…" he stammered, "We're all hoping that everything turns out for the best, you know. We hope Primus is watching over you." The yellow Autobot smiled kindly.

Frenzy snorted. "Pit, I hope he's _not_." He muttered.

"What?" Bumblebee frowned.

"Lotta good he's done watching out for me so far." Frenzy spat, then stalked into the Med Bay. Bumblebee stood outside as the doors closed, shuffling his feet sheepishly. His normally pleasant expression had turned pensive.


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: I wanted this chapter to go farther, I really meant for it to. But sometimes ya just gotta let a guy play cards and wangst. Thanks for everyone who has commented. Hopefully I'll have some more emosauce out there for you soon.

____

"Hmm…there seems to be signs of growth. What do you think Perceptor?" First Aid gestured into the opened chassis with his scanner. The Autobot microscope focused his lenses on the internal components revealed, the fine and coarse adjustment knobs twisting on the neck of his microscope mode as he examined.

"Yes, indubitably; though when cross-referenced with the data you presented to me, the rate of growth remains far below expected values." The oversized microscope transformed so he could gesture more freely with his hands. "Furthermore, spectrographic analysis indicates that the protoform plating has not alloyed sufficiently to provide much structural defense."

First Aid continued his scans of the protoform capsule. "Yes, but plating is often slow developing when the carrier's systems are taxed. It only means that development is more focused on internal systems, a good thing in this case."

Sighing loudly, Frenzy drummed his fingers against the berth and tried to watch TV. For the first time in days he had enough energy to get mad, but only just, and he didn't want to waste it too quick. He was going to enjoy every astrosecond of it.

_Stupid fraggin' docbots, talking like I'm not her, _Frenzy thought sourly. Of course, a few days earlier, when Hoist and First Aid had tried to draw him into a conversation about their scans, he'd blown them off. But still, it would be nice if the stupid doctors made the effort to include him, even if he was just going to ignore them anyway.

_Three days…_he thought, savoring the frustration. _Three days since they last let me out of fraggin' Med Bay. Why did I talk to 'em at all if they were just gonna lock me up again?_ Each day he'd waited eagerly for First Aid to come and scan him, and each day his hopes of scoping out more of the Autobot Headquarters were dashed by the stupid doctor's insistence that he was too, 'unstable' to let out and about.

But the worst part was that the effectiveness of Wheeljack's 'sleep-machine' meant that when Frenzy was awake he was awake enough to feel the boredom acutely. No more slipping in and out of half-recharge day in and day out. He had to sit through the hours he wasn't recharging in complete, infuriating, consciousness.

Bumblebee had come to visit him once or twice, and Frenzy, in his boredom, had actually welcomed the company. Though he'd done his best to keep his guest from knowing it. They'd had a few stilted discussions about squishy culture, and watched a lot of TV. Bumblebee kept asking when Frenzy might be let out of Med Bay again, rattling off lists of Autobots who 'just couldn't wait to meet him'.

Ironhide was in and out. He hadn't missed a Bonanza episode yet, and he tended to find reasons to linger around, even though he was no longer needed to coax the Decepticon into recharge. He kept pestering Frenzy to read the stupid datapads on sparkling care. Then he would try and quiz him on the information. Frenzy did his best to answer as belligerently as possible, which usually cut the conversations shorter.

Frenzy wiggled a little bit as First Aid tapped against his oversensitive internals with one of those damn probes. He felt a sharp kick in response and he glared at First Aid who shrugged apologetically as he closed the Mini-Cassette's chassis.

"Well Frenzy…" he started slowly.

"Don't tell me," Frenzy snapped. "You're not going to let me out again."

Shaking his head First Aid hooked up an energon line. "No, that's not it at all. I was just going to say that if you're still in the green when Ironhide comes by later I might let him take you to the Motor Pool. If you promise to take it easy."

"I promise you I'll go wearing teal and hot-pink paint and a cowboy hat, if it means I'll get out of this stupid Med Bay for a couple hours."

First Aid laughed. "I don't think that'll be necessary. Now, why don't you turn off this TV and read some of your datapads? You know Ironhide will ask if you've looked over them." The Autobot doctor picked up 'Tiny Transistors' and handed it to the Mini-Cassette.

"Has he perused the 'Preterm Protoform' datatracks yet?" Perceptor asked as he completed his calculations on this morning's measurements.

The doctor turned to his patient who only shrugged. "I took a look," Frenzy muttered. And he had, though he'd pretty quickly put the datapad down. Reading never really was his thing, and that medical guidebook had so much… Well, he'd much rather watch TV anyway. _Still at least pretending to read the stupid 'Tiny Transistors' will get that big, dumb blockhead off'a my skidplates._ The Decepticon stared at the shining screen while the doctor and the scientist discussed with each other in half-hushed tones.

_Although safely encased within the protoform capsule before delivery, your growing sparkling was still very much aware of its surroundings. As the little one's sensory components came online, information was sent to the developing central processor. Your movements, slight changes in heat and cold, changes in energy level, and myriad sounds, all gradually began to be quantified and categorized. Near the end of your sparkling's development, as the plating started to solidify, the sparkling may have shown preferences for certain sounds, and aversions to others. Gentle, rhythmic sounds tend to result in less motion, and relaxed body posture, from most sparklings, while high-pitched or sudden and loud sounds lead to a startle response, followed by a proto-curl defensive reflex. _

_Developing sparklings often become more active as they hear the voice of their carriers. Your sparkling may have recognized your voice as distinct from others, as well as the voice of its sire and others you often conversed with. If you talked to your sparkling before it was delivered, you will probably have an easier time teaching it to settle. It will register your voice as an indicator of safety, useful in reassuring it after delivery…_

"Doin' yer homework finally, kid?"

Frenzy hadn't even realized he was reading the information until he heard Ironhide ask the question over his shoulder. Turning to look at the big, red mech he put on his most desperate expression.

"Ya gotta get me outta here man," he begged. "I watched 'Fresh Prince of Bel Aire' yesterday. For three slaggin' hours."

Ironhide grinned and gestured to the datapad. "How much readin' did ya get done?"

Waving the pad over his head Frenzy practically shrieked. "Tons just slaggin' tons, I ain't read so much since that time Rumble and I found that MAD Magazine in that fishin' boat! I swear!"

Crossing his arms over his windshield, Ironhide gave the tiny Cassetticon a critical look. "An if I do take you out to the Motor Pool, you promise yer gonna behave yourself?"

"Yesss." Frenzy hissed, his voice a choked mix of frustration and desperation.

"And read some more when we get back?"

"Yes! Slaggin' whatever you want! Just get me outta this stupid slaggin' room!"

The big red Autobot laughed, and turned to look where First Aid and Perceptor were crouched over something. "Can I take the kid out to the Motor Pool?" he called.

"Hmmm? Oh, yes. Sure. Just make sure he doesn't—"

"Wear himself out! I know, I know, I slaggin' KNOW!" Frenzy sighed as he hopped off the table. First Aid and Ironhide shared a look over the Decepticon's head. Ironhide nodded seriously, and then looked down at his charge.

"Okay then kid. Let's see who's hangin' out at the Pool."

***

It amazed Ironhide, truly amazed him, that despite all the desperate whining to get out of the Med Bay the first thing Frenzy did when he reached the Motor Pool was plop down in front of the TV. The big, red mech shook his head bemusedly and sat down next to him, casting his glance around the room to see who else was hanging around.

He frowned at the group sitting close to the radio, apparently tensely engaged in a game of cards. He frowned even more when Sideswipe leaned over and turned the radio up just a hair, just enough to hide words under if they all talked softly. When Windcharger shot Frenzy what might have been a quick, dirty look, Ironhide stood up sharply and strode over to the table. Frenzy seemed content to ignore him.

"Ironhide." Brawn greeted flatly, throwing a few cards on the table.

"What're you guys playing?" Ironhide asked, his voice firmly inviting them to be civil.

"War." Windcharger answered, a little impudently. "Two decks."

"Need any more players?"

Sideways glances were exchanged all around the table. "Game's already started." Sunstreaker explained.

Ironhide crossed his arms over his chest, glaring. Inferno and Smokescreen scooted their chairs over to make room. Sideswipe narrowed his optics at the Datsun and fire truck.

"Uhh, here, uh Ironhide," Inferno stumbled awkwardly, "We don't mind starting over. Do we guys?" There were a few muttered agreements, a few shrugs and muted nods. Everyone looked nervous and shamefaced. Ironhide went to grab a chair.

"Kid," he called out to the Casseticon by the TV, "You wanna play cards?" Brawn glared at Smokescreen as he tossed his cards to the blue and red mech who was serving as dealer.

Frenzy turned to look at the group around the table. Inferno smiled stiffly at him, the rest just stared at Smokescreen's card shuffling. The Mini-Cassette shook his head and turned back to the TV. Ironhide sighed, _All that arm twisting and the little punk says no. _Ironhide had put up too much of a fuss to drop the game now, and from the rumors that were getting back to him he knew that these were the mechs he most needed to talk to.

Ironhide just hoped it wouldn't turn into a fight.

The Security 'Bot sat down just as Smokescreen started doling the cards out. He reached for each card as it was handed to him, stacking them neatly at his side without looking at them.

For a moment they all adjusted their cards in the thick silence. But Windcharger was impatient to get to the meat of the impending conversation, no matter how uncomfortable it might be. So he broke the silence after less than a minute.

"So," he started, quietly, "How much longer until, you know?" He flicked at the edges of his cards with his thumb, and nodded quickly over to the chair by the TV. Drawing his first card, the Mini-Bot warrior flipped it over onto the table, it was the four of spades. Windcharger grumbled at the card.

"First Aid says another two weeks, minimum." Ironhide answered, his voice low. Sideswipe reached behind himself and turned the radio's volume up again. Gun's 'N Roses shrieked a little louder, making it easier to talk without being understood across the room. Sunstreaker leaned back, as if bored, and tossed his card to the middle of the table. Two of diamonds; Windcharger smirked.

"Is it?..I mean…I heard from Bumblebee that…that it wasn't doing so hot." Inferno drummed his fingers on the table, his optics full of concerned curiosity.

Ironhide sighed and nodded. He really didn't want to have to play the pity card. It didn't seem fair to the kid. But he needed these guys on his side. "It's small, yeah. Even for a Mini-Cassette."

"Is it even going to make it?" Sideswipe asked, tossing out the seven of hearts. Windcharger grumbled and flicked his card further from himself.

Shrugging, Ironhide fiddled with his card pile. "There's a chance it won't, a bigger chance than I'd like."

Brawn snorted and tossed out the jack of clubs. "Maybe it would be better if it didn't." The demolitions expert's voice was even, matter-of –fact. The table froze in shocked silence, Inferno twitched his card out as if trying to move things past the statement as quickly as possible; four of diamonds.

"What do you mean by that?" Ironhide asked, the barest hint of a growl beneath a carefully controlled calm. He pulled off the top card off his pile and flipped it over. Eight of spades.

"Look," Brawn started, leaning in heavily, "It's nothing against the kid personally, and I'm not sayin' that we should…you know. I'm just sayin', maybe it's better for everyone, especially the kid and…well…the sparkling, if it didn't make it."

Pulling on a deep well of control, though part of him would have dearly loved to snap, Ironhide resolved to himself to _talk_ this through. He had to convince them, and he had to do it with words, not his fists; which were clenched tightly under the table.

"How do you figure?" he rumbled darkly. Smokescreen pulled out a five of diamonds and tossed it dismissively into the pile in the middle of the table.

"I think what Brawn is trying to say," the Datsun started, "is that many of us have concerns. None of us want this to end badly, for anyone." Brawn frowned at Smokescreen and raked his cards in. "But this is a very…confusing, situation. And we've gotten so many conflicting reports."

Ironhide rubbed his optics. "You don't know the half of it," he muttered. Luckily Windcharger didn't hear him.

"How do we know we can trust him?" Windcharger whipped out the queen of clubs and tried to hide his smirk behind a serious countenance. Sunstreaker dropped a jack of diamonds and sighed, leaning back again.

"Especially when everyone involved has been so stingy with facts," Brawn added.

"We didn't even know you guys were holding him here for almost a month, and then, suddenly, rumors are flying all over headquarters. And then, suddenly, he's got amnesty and protection and tours around base, and a huge room and now he's staying with us? With a kid?" Sideswipe played the six of clubs, but was too involved in the conversation to care. "And we have no idea how any of this happened."

Ironhide glanced over his shoulder, but Frenzy hadn't moved. He looked back at the group cautiously. "Keep it down," he muttered.

"How _did_ he get here?" Brawn interrogated, "I mean, I've heard Tracks' story and it doesn't wash up." The Mini-Bot pulled out the ten of spades. "Why would a Decepticon be out there alone? Attacking a lighthouse?"

"Look," Ironhide muttered, "I haven't heard the story Tracks' is tellin' _you_ guys yet, but if he's tellin' the truth, then that's the truth. Prime caught the kid out there attacking a lighthouse."

"Was he carrying then?" Inferno asked, playing his nine of hearts rather tentatively.

"Yes," Ironhide mumbled, trying to figure out where he was going to draw the line. Smokescreen leaned in. Ironhide played the two of hearts.

"Did he know it?" Smokescreen pulled out a king of spades, Windcharger sighed loudly as the Datsun raked in the cards. He immediately pulled out a ten of diamonds and glared at it.

"Look, you wanna know stuff like that, you gotta ask the kid yourself. It's his business." Ironhide explained while he counted his cards without flipping them over. Thirteen.

Sunstreaker looked at his card and grinned a little before laying it out. "But don't you think, if he's going to stay with us, and we're going to be asked to accept him, that we have the right to a little information? Like why he's been granted amnesty?" the yellow sports car queried. He tapped at his ace of clubs. "Gentlemechs, I think this round's mine." Sunstreaker grinned. Windcharger scowled.

"If we don't have _any_ information, how do we know we can trust him?" Sideswipe added. "Cus I'll be frank with you Ironhide, I don't. I don't trust him." The red sports car pulled out the jack of diamonds, and tossed it on the table like a challenge, despite the fact it was a losing card.

"Me neither," Brawn agreed, playing the two of clubs. "So far I haven't heard any good reason to."

"Optimus trusts him," Ironhide lied. "And Optimus knows all the facts."

"Do you know them too?" Inferno flipped over a three of spades, looking at the older red mech curiously.

"Most of 'em, yeah," Ironhide admitted. "But that doesn't mean everybody's got to know them. Kid's gotta have some privacy." Ironhide threw out a jack of clubs and gave Brawn a look bordering on a glare. "It's Prime's decision anyway. He's heard all the _informed_ opinions already, and he's decided."

"Ironhide has a point," Smokescreen said softly. "If we don't trust Frenzy, I think we all agree that we trust Prime." He played a five of hearts. Sunstreaker gathered his cards with a grin of cool near-indifference. Ironhide glanced over his shoulder again. Frenzy still hadn't moved, and he'd turned up the TV even louder.

"Red Alert doesn't trust Frenzy." Windcharger laid out a nine of clubs.

"Red Alert doesn't trust anybody," Sideswipe snickered. Sunstreaker snorted in agreement and played a seven of diamonds.

"He's really worked up about all this," Windcharger added knowingly, "Right Inferno?" Sideswipe played an eight of diamonds. Sunstreaker glared at his brother.

Inferno only shrugged. "It's his job," he mumbled. "He's supposed to look for danger, even when there isn't really any. Ironhide has a point, it's Optimus' decision, and Optimus trusts him."

"Optimus isn't always right," Brawn reminded them. He tossed the eight of clubs into the middle of the table. "Nothing against our fearless leader, of course, but he's just a 'Bot."

Putting a three of diamonds in the middle of the table, Inferno shrugged. "I don't know," He said finally. "It's just…so complicated."

"And there's so much more than just Frenzy to consider." Smokescreen glanced quickly over towards the direction of the TV.

"What do you mean?" Ironhide tossed a two of spades onto the table. Windcharger had perked up when he realized that his nine of clubs was still top card.

"Is letting Frenzy stay, and letting Frenzy try to take care of this sparkling himself, is that what would be best for the sparkling?" Smokescreen dragged an ace of hearts to the center of the table, and let his finger linger on it. "Shouldn't we be protecting the sparkling? Even from its own parent?"

"Are you saying we should take it from him?" Ironhide said, troubled. Smokescreen shrugged and gathered the cards.

Windcharger fought the urge to just fold; since he had yet to win a hand, but he had to get his two chips in. "Are we even going to have a choice?" he asked. He drew a jack of spades, and tried to temper his faint excitement at the card. "I wouldn't place any bets on the nurturing abilities of sawed off Decepticon drop-outs."

Sunstreaker played a three of clubs silently.

"Sparklings are demanding, by all accounts. And stressful." Smokescreen glanced at Ironhide. "I'll admit that I don't have much first-hand experience…"

"I do," Inferno said "Well, I mean, a little. Rescuing sparklings from buildings and…it's tricky." The fire truck admitted. "They don't always act logically. And they're so fragile sometimes. And then…when they don't stop crying, sheesh."

Sideswipe laid out a ten of clubs. "I don't even think he's gonna stick around."

Nodding in agreement Brawn laid out a four of hearts. "Frenzy's gonna run off at the first real opportunity. Hopefully he'll leave the kid with us, if he knows what's good for it."

"Decepticons, they're his family," Sideswipe continued. "His brother's still over there on the other side. Trust me, he's not sticking around with us."

Inferno flicked away a two of diamonds, leaning into the conversation with a tense, unsure interest.

"You don't know all the facts," Ironhide rumbled, laying out a jack of hearts.

"No, but I know the type," Sideswipe replied. "And he's going back."

Smokescreen shrugged and put down a seven of spades. "Looks like we have a war, gentlemechs."

Windcharger grinned and dealt three cards, face down, beneath his jack of spades. "They've got a point Ironhide," he said, while Ironhide dealt three cards under his jack of hearts. "What if Frenzy hurts the sparkling?"

Ironhide flipped over a queen of clubs; he couldn't hide a faint, dark smile. "Are you sayin' we should take a sparkling away from its parent just 'cause we might think, only _think_, that the kid would make a bad parent?"

"By the time we know he's a bad parent, it might be too late," Brawn said; his face was grim. Windcharger flipped over a queen of hearts.

"Double war." Smokescreen said.

Ironhide slapped down another three cards, deeply disturbed by this line of thinking. Windcharger did the same, getting nervous as his stack dwindled. If he lost this double war he would have only three cards left. He pulled out one more card and flipped it over. It was a three of clubs. Windcharger groaned.

"Listen." Ironhide's hand lingered over his face down card. "I can't tell you everythin', and part of me really wishes I could, but I'll tell you this much. That kid's been through a lot for this sparkling already. I know he's in fer a whole lot more, but I don't have a doubt in my mind that he cares a lot about it. An' that's why he's here. Okay?" He flipped over his card.

It was a joker.

"Oops!" Smokescreen smiled apologetically. "Didn't know I'd left those in there." He pulled the card away. Ironhide sighed and flipped over his next card. It was a two of diamonds. Windcharger grinned and he raked all the cards in. Ironhide twirled his one remaining card under his finger then flicked it over to Inferno.

"I think I'm done here." Ironhide stood up. "Jus'… don't go causin' any trouble, okay? Like you said, it's complicated."

Smokescreen nodded, and slowly the rest of the table joined in. "It's Prime's decision," Brawn said, resigned. "We may not completely agree with it…but we know it comes from the right place."

Ironhide nodded and turned around to face the TV.

Frenzy was gone.

"Dammit!" Ironhide glanced around the room. Then rushed out the door. The rest of the room was silent, the game obviously finished.

Inferno flipped over Ironhide's last card.

It was the ace of hearts.


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: I hope you're happy. I hope you're really fraggin' happy. Because I stayed up so late finishing this super long chapter, full of angst and other delicious things, FOR YOU, that I accidently hit my snooze button eight times, in my sleep, this morning, and missed my Spanish class.

Bravo, , Bravo.

As always, reviews are so greatly appreciated.

________

It's hard to be sneaky when you are a mostly black and red robot and you're creeping down the edge of a brightly lit, orange hallway. Frenzy was very aware of this. So rather than attempt to slip around completely unseen, he did his best to look like he was simply purposefully strolling down this hallway, not suspiciously at all. So far he'd been lucky. So far he hadn't run into anyone yet.

When he'd realized just how deep the mechs playing cards had been in their conversation Frenzy hadn't been able to resist the urge to slip out. Stupid slagger's had that radio turned up so loud they hadn't heard him tiptoe out, especially after he'd turned the TV up. But he'd managed to hear a few snatches of what the damn Autobots had said. Not all of it, but enough to get the gist of most of the argument, at least up to when they'd started talking about takin' it from him. It didn't bug him that some of the stupid grunts didn't trust him. But some of the other stuff…he clenched his fists. _Everyone wants to take this from me._ He felt an echo of the anger he could normally whip himself into, though muted by his lack of energy. _Nobody thinks I can do it._ The fact that Frenzy himself was pretty unsure was for the moment pushed aside by his anger. And the effort of his sneaking.

_Now was the Teletraan room down here? Or was that the way to that Cargo F that doesn't exist?_ Frenzy stopped just before the hallway branched, not wanting to be seen if he could avoid it. He stared at the inscrutable puzzle of orange panels above and around him, hoping for something to jar his memory. Finally he just took his best hunch and continued on. His every sensor was on edge, fully expecting that any second some Autobot or another would appear and question him. _Just need to get a feel of the place…to know how to get from the fraggin' Med Bay to Telatraan to the exit._

Another intersection, and on a whim Frenzy went right. This hallway was wider, which had to be a good sign, at least, it seemed like it had to be. Frenzy stopped and looked behind. Part of him really just wanted to go back. He stared down at his chest and saw that the indicator had gone from green to yellow. He drummed on his chest cautiously, but a sharp kick right into his cosmotron silenced his fears. He hissed softy as the dull ache spread annoyingly, like grinding metal plates together. Another kick and he rapped his knuckles against his chest.

"You!" he whispered sharply, "Cut that out!"

Frenzy started walking again, and the chaos in his chest settled. He grinned a little. "Okay kiddo," he mumbled, "Let's do some spyin'."

Two more randomly chosen turns and one long pause as someone passed through a perpendicular hallway without seeing Frenzy, and Frenzy was completely lost. He had no idea where he was in relation to the Med Bay or the Motor Pool or the quarters. He had also just found the Control Room.

Hugging up next to a huge stone pillar, suddenly very much not wanting to be seen, he peered around the huge room as best he could, taking note of where exactly the Dinobot Door was and how far it was from himself. It seemed like there was no one around. Cautiously taking a few steps forward he looked around again. There was no one.

Frenzy smirked widely and walked up to the massive computer terminal. He frowned up at the switchboard, just above his optic level. Dropping his gaze he noticed a prominent access panel that took up most of the base of the computer. The panel seemed to be pretty new, and the big screws at the corners looked like the kind that were easy to get off if you knew how to grip 'em right. Frenzy reached out to touch one.

"Looking for something?" The voice behind him was sharp and almost predatory. It was an accusation, not a question. Frenzy spun around and stared up at the 'F' and 'D' on either side of the outline of a badge. He trailed the red chest plate up past the Autobot insignia and met the keen, suspicious optics of Red Alert. Somehow the mech had snuck right up behind him, silently, without Frenzy even realizing it.

Suppressing his sudden fear, Frenzy inched guiltily away from Teletraan One. "N…N…No. Well. Uhhhh, I mean, yes. I got lost." Red Alert crossed his arms, and waited. The set of the Autobot's shoulders, his tight expression, and the intense scrutiny with which he watched the Mini-Cassette sent Frenzy's energon pump throbbing. The Security Director didn't say anything. "I uhhh…heh…" Frenzy backed up a few more feet and glanced at the super-computer, then down at his feet. He couldn't meet the Autobot's gaze, and he was starting to get angry. "I was just trying to see if the computer had…a….map. A, you know, map of the base and stuff. So I would know where the Med Bay was, and my room, and the Motor Pool." Frenzy shuffled his feet. Red Alert just watched him; silently. "And stuff," the Decepticon finally coughed.

"A map." Red Alert's eyes glinted, and Frenzy couldn't help but feel that the weird 'bot could see right through him.

"This place is slaggin' confusing!" Frenzy snapped suddenly, getting more than irritated at his prolonged fear. "I was just tryin' to find the Med Bay." He grumbled, and his hand found its way to the indicator on his chest. "I'm in the yellow, see? I need to get back. But I got all turned around after I left the Motor Pool."

Frenzy saw the Autobot's optics flick to the monitor on his chest. Red Alert's hands lowered to his sides and he took a step forward. He stared at the Mini-Cassette again, who tried his hardest not to glare at him. For a long time Red Alert stared, and then, finally, his shoulders relaxed just a hair and the taller mech sighed quietly. It almost sounded like frustration.

"Why didn't you wait for whoever took you to the Motor Pool to take you back?"

"Ironhide was busy playin' cards. I didn't really wanna frag him off." Frenzy clenched his fists. He was sick of being interrogated every other hour.

"Well, you probably have," Red Alert snapped. He turned abruptly and gestured to the door. "Come on," he clipped, "Med Bay." Frenzy started toward the door, sneering to himself when the Autobot began to follow him. He was so caught up in his feeble rage that he didn't really watch where he was going and slammed his face into a round speaker decorating a grey, boxy knee.

"Hey!" Blaster called out in surprised concern, his hands finding their way instinctively to Frenzy's shoulders as the Autobot's Communications Director bent over to get a better look at the little Cassetticon. Frenzy stared up at the large tape deck, frozen; ignoring the wiggles, twists, and kicks coming from more than just the sparkling inside him. The Autobot's hands stayed where they were, taking in the Decepticon's expression with a kind of astonished compassion. "Hey," Blaster said again, soft. "Hey, Frenzy."

Frenzy frowned, still staring; his bluster and bravado stripped away by the shock, leaving him looking confused, vulnerable, and very young.

"Didn't hurt you, did I?" Blaster asked, his face pained with discomfort and worry. He squeezed Frenzy's shoulders slightly and tried to look into his visor. Frenzy shook his head, and slowly but firmly pulled himself away.

"Blaster," Red Alert started, "Excellent. Will you escort Frenzy back to the Med Bay?"

"Uhh…sure thing, Red," Blaster replied, not taking his eyes off the Cassetticon. "Be glad to."

The Security Director was stern as he pointed at Frenzy. "Next time, Frenzy, tell your chaperone where you are going." Red Alert's optics were bright and hard. "We don't want you to have any accidents around here do we?"

"Sure," Frenzy mumbled, hunching his shoulders and hanging his head; pulling in on himself. Reluctantly the Mini-Cassette followed the tall, red tape-deck out, Red Alert's incisive gaze still burning into the back of the Decepticon as he left the Control Room.

As he carefully measured his stride to let Frenzy walk at his own pace, Blaster looked down at the Mini-Cassette and put on a wide smile that couldn't quite wipe the uneasy sadness from his optics. "So, Frenzy, you get lost around here?"

"Yeah." Frenzy wouldn't look at the tape deck. "Stupid walls all look the same."

Blaster laughed, "Yeah, I suppose they do." The taller mech scratched at the back of his helm. "Heh. Nice to get to meet you finally, you know."

Frenzy snorted. "I'm not that diff'rent from Rumble. You met him." He reached up to drum on his chest, but let his arm flop weakly to his side after only a few taps.

"If you call getting' punched in the face meetin' someone." Blaster smirked.

Staring straight ahead, Frenzy worked very hard at memorizing every turn they made down the halls.

"Eject and Rewind, they're really itching to meet and greet you," Blaster added as they rounded a corner.

"Who?"

"My Mini-Cassettes," Blaster answered, a little gently. Frenzy looked up at him in surprise, and nearly stopped in the hall.

"Didn't know you had Cassettes," He stammered.

Blaster smiled and tapped his tape deck as he walked. "Oh, they're still too young to go out in a fight. Though they're revin' their motors to, all the time. 'Specially Eject."

"Are…uh…are they, you know…?" Trailing off as he eyed Blaster's tape deck, Frenzy felt a strange twist deep in his spark, too deep to be his sparkling anymore.

"No," Blaster said, fondly nodding at his chest, "their creators were…offlined. A while ago. I've just been looking out for them since. Minis need a guardian longer than anybot else," Blaster gave Frenzy a knowing look, "Takes them the longest to really grow up."

Frenzy didn't answer as they rounded another corner. The two mechs almost ran right into Ironhide going the other way. After getting over his initial shock, Ironhide glared down at Frenzy and shook his fist.

"There you are! Dammit kid! Ya know how long I been lookin' fer you? What'd ya go runnin' off without tellin' me for?" He then gave Blaster a friendly, if a bit curt, nod. "Blaster," He greeted shortly, before turning back to Frenzy again. "I had to call up Red Alert an' tell him you were missin', and he wasn't too happy 'bout it. What the hell did ya think you were doin'?"

"I was _tryin'_ to get back to the goddamn Med Bay!" Frenzy snipped, his hands on his hips, his weak anger almost morphing into a pitiful whine. "All the stupid, slaggin', retard-orange walls in here look the same, and I got all turned around. Okay?"

Ironhide hunkered down until he was as close to Frenzy's optic level as he was going to get without sitting or kneeling. Frenzy felt about two feet tall. "Dammit kid," he started, gentler than before, "ya gotta let me know where you're at. What if somethin' had happened to you?"

Frenzy stared at his shuffling feet and shrugged.

Sighing, Ironhide straightened up. He rubbed at his optics and gestured to Blaster. "Look Blaster, can ya take 'im back to Med Bay fer me? I gotta go talk ta Red."

Blaster smiled and nodded, "Sure thing 'Hide. We were just headin' there before we ran into you. Right Frenzy?" Frenzy sighed.

"Alright then, I'll be there in an hour or so." Ironhide shot Frenzy a stern, but somewhat relieved, glance before continuing on in the direction of the Control Room. They watched him go for a moment.

"Man, you really got everyone on your case, huh?" Blaster commented as they started back down the hall.

"That ain't the half of it," Frenzy muttered. He turned again to stare at the tall tape-deck.

"Must be rough."

Frenzy looked down at the monitor; he was further into the yellow and he could feel it in every circuit and linkage. His whole infrastructure grated and begged for a good stretch, but he just didn't have the energy. He sighed, "Yeah," he finally mumbled, half-surprised at himself for answering. He felt his spark sink automatically when he registered the doors of the Med Bay.

"Here we are. Home, sweet home," Blaster declared with a kind of sympathetic sarcasm. They both waited in a heavy, tense silence. Finally Blaster bent over, much like Ironhide had, scratching the back of his helm like he was still unsure. "Listen here, Frenzy," he started, his optics showing the same troubled sympathy they'd had earlier. "I…uh…I haven't heard the whole story, no one has. But if you need someone, to listen or talk, that knows a little better what it's like to, you know," he paused for a moment, "be like _we_ are, just give me a shout out. Okay?"

The Mini-Cassette stared up at the large tape-deck hovering over him. He only half-registered what the Autobot had said. His exhausted emotions were being wrung this way and that by a desperate, lonely homesickness. He could only nod mutely in reply; hoping the Autobot counterpart to _his_ guardian would hurry up and leave him alone.

Blaster patted him on the shoulder, paternally, and stood up. "Well then," he offered brightly, "Hope to see you around soon! And remember," he flickered an optic in an approximation of a wink, "you need a sparkling sitter in a few weeks, I got all the hippest new lullabies."

"Kay," Frenzy replied flatly. The Autobot turned to go. Frenzy watched him stride down the hall, until the boombox turned the corner and was out of sight. For a split second Frenzy considered sneaking off again, but he knew he wouldn't be able to come up anywhere near as good of an excuse this time. Plus, he was dead-battery tired.

First Aid was there in an instant to greet him when Frenzy opened the door. "Oh, there you are! I expected you back hours ago! In the yellow? Oh dear, you need to be more careful." The Mini-Cassette was ushered over to his berth and First Aid in short order had an energon line hooked up, a cube in his patient's hands, and was scanning him from helm to heel. Frenzy did his best to ignore the doctor by grabbing the remote and listlessly channel surfing. He hardly even registered the nanite injection into his energon line, only giving his monitor a peek while it climbed slowly from yellow to green.

"So, how was the Motor Pool this time?" First Aid asked, as he entered his data.

"Peachy," Frenzy sighed. First Aid cocked his head quizzically. Standing near his patient's head, First Aid rested a hand on Frenzy's shoulder. A deep, irritated dread welled up in the Decepticon. "What?" he snapped.

"I realize you must be tired now, Frenzy," First Aid's voice was extra gentle, and it drove the exhausted Cassetticon up the wall. "Later, however, I want to talk with you a little more about…about what we talked about earlier."

"I read that damned datapad!" Frenzy griped, "I know all the slag in it!"

"Not that," First Aid corrected, delicately, "Earlier."

Frenzy stiffened under the Autobot's hand and glared past the doctor. "I thought we were through talkin' bout that," he grumbled.

First Aid shook his head. "Frenzy, you need to talk about it. For your own sake, as well as the sparkling's. It's something we need to come to terms with, so we can move on."

Frenzy's glare deepened, but he didn't say anymore. First Aid patted him on the shoulder gently. "We don't need to talk about it this moment," he acquiesced. "You should rest now anyway."

Reaching for Wheeljack's sleep machine, First Aid continued, "I'll set this for three hours recharge, Ironhide will be in after that to watch the cowboy crap with you. Okay, Frenzy?"

"Okay..," the Mini-Cassette sighed. In a few moments he was deep in recharge. The Autobot doctor busied himself with his project in the corner of the Med Bay. The little sparkling support-berth still needed a little fine tuning. First Aid found himself tweaking it after nearly every scan. He wanted to be prepared for the sparkling at any moment. He had to be. Reaching out for the berth's computer panel, the ambulance was interrupted by an alarm on his comn channel. No words, just a general indicator that medical assistance was needed quickly in the Control Room.

After first giving the numerous monitors surrounding Frenzy a quick, but careful, look, First Aid transformed and rolled out of Med Bay. Frenzy would be in recharge for three hours, more than enough time to fix whatever this problem was. For a moment First Aid considered calling in Ratchet or Hoist to watch him, but then again they may have been called to the medical emergency too. And he would only be gone for a moment. Surely nothing could happen in so short a time.

Surely.

When he rolled into the Control Room he was more than surprised that only Red Alert was there, obviously uninjured, and working away with his usual intensity on Teletraan 1. First Aid looked around the room again. No one, nothing, not even a broken circuit board.

"Did…did you comm me?" the Autobot doctor asked, tentatively.

Red Alert pulled away from the computer to look at the Protectobot. "No." His face twisted in suspicion as he quickly turned back to the terminal.

"But I got an alarm, a call for medical assistance in the Control Room."

"That's interesting," Red Alert replied, in a tone that suggested that it was much more than just 'interesting.' "Teletraan just got message of a Decepticon attack on a remote power plant a few hours away. Prime sent out a team to investigate before I had a chance to verify." The suspicion in the Autobot's voice only grew as he worked. Suddenly he stiffened. Then he leaned in over the keyboard and doubled his operating speed.

"So…what it is?"

Red Alert pulled away from Teletraan, switching the computer off. "It's good you're here," he declared zealously, "Because we have trouble."

"What?"

"Not here!" Red Alert hissed. "My office. And put a comn through to Cargo F for Prime." The Security director considered for an astrosecond. "And Ironhide as well," he conceded.

"But there is no--"

"I know! I know! Just do it! It's a matter of _security_!"

***

It took Frenzy a few minutes before he remembered to be surprised that he'd woken up. And he hadn't just woken gradually. He felt like he'd been jarred out of recharge by a loud yell and a kick to the head. For a moment it felt just like home. _But I shouldn't 'ave woke up_, Frenzy thought as he stared up at the ceiling, which was depressingly orange. He reached up and pulled the spiky helmet off his helm. Dragging himself into a sitting position on the berth, he looked the helmet over carefully. _Doesn't look broken…at least not broken like I usually break stuff._ He looked around the room. He was alone.

The energon line was empty, so he twisted it off and slid off the berth. A long, delicious stretch earned Frenzy a few sleepy kicks to the laser core. The Mini-Cassette flicked his chest, making a dampened ping ring through the Med Bay.

"Aww…go back to sleep, ya little slaghead," he smirked softly. Frenzy started exploring the room sluggishly, enjoying the wonderful combination of sneaking and safety. That is, until he wandered into the wrong corner.

Frenzy recognized it instantly when he saw it, and stared at it with some trepidation. Though it had been in the room for days, he'd never really gotten a good look at it before. But there it was.

It was a heinous combination of a sparkling berth and a Med Bay table with a confusing array of dials, monitors, and buttons all over it. And it sat there in the corner, mocking them. It was a ticking time-bomb, a trap about to be sprung, and somehow strangely, grudgingly precious, all at once. Frenzy walked right up to it and put his hand on the rail, looking down into it blankly. Trying to resist the urge to smash it into a million pieces.

He'd never seen anything like it before now.

There wasn't anything even close at Decepticon Headquarters.

Frenzy's thoughts went very dark for a moment, before a soft tapping gave him a most welcome distraction.

The source of the tapping was even more welcome, especially as a slender, purple rectangle dropped from a vent high in the ceiling and transformed as it fell.

"Rumble!" Frenzy felt a rush of relief and joy at the sight of his brother.

"Shhhhhh…." Rumble grabbed Frenzy's arm a pulled him deeper into the corner. "Keep it down," he shushed, "Beaky says there's a ton more cameras and sensors in here. Jamming field is smaller and weaker, so for the love of curvy plating _keep it down_."

Nodding, Frenzy leaned in close. _Rumble's here; he'll tell me what to do._ His homesickness had instantly been cut in half.

"Damn," Rumble started at a whisper, "You don't know how hard it was to finally get an astrosecond with you. We been watchin' for fraggin days, but you weren't never alone or awake. Finally Beaky had to pull a couple stunts, only hope the fraggers fell for it." The purple Cassetticon suddenly looked worried. "If your cover gets blown you're gonna have to make a break for it pretty damn fast." His optic-band trailed down to the monitor on his brother's chest. Frenzy followed Rumble's gaze nervously, biting down a pang of shame.

"Couldn't get 'em to--" he started haltingly.

"Forget it. I figured as much, damn fuckin' Autobots. Don't worry 'bout it. You'll be out of here in no time and Hook'll do things right."

Frenzy sank a little, and tried to gather up the nerve to tell his brother his plans. But Rumble barreled right on.

"You find anything yet?"

"Yeah, I think so. I think I know where the chip thing is."

Rumble's optic band glinted mischievously, "Slag, you work fast! Can't blame ya though. Almost six weeks with the lube-sucking, fleshy-loving Autobots…Damn bro. Ya gotta tell me all about it when this is over." Rumble grinned. "Been too quiet in Soundie's chest with you gone. Haven't been able to have a slaggin' real conversation."

Frenzy grinned widely. "'S been a fuckin' nightmare, bro."

"Well, it'll be all over and done with soon. Everything back to the way it was before." Rumble took his brother's hand and dropped something into it. "Here. Something to call for your flight outta here."

"What is it?" Frenzy asked, looking at the little, dark grey box with a few flat buttons on it.

"A transmitter, a homing device. Just get a mile or so from here and trigger it and we'll come pick you up. But ya gotta be quick."

Nodding, Frenzy sequestered it away in his leg compartment where his gun used to be. "They been watchin' me pretty close. It might be a while 'fore I can get away."

"Just push the button, Frenzy. We'll be there," Rumble reassured him. Then he frowned and picked up Frenzy's arm. "They disable your drivers?" Frenzy nodded. Rumble pulled Frenzy over so they were standing right under the vent. "Hey! Laserbeak!" Rumble hissed gesturing from the vent to Frenzy's arm. "Can ya do anything about this?"

A slim, black and red rectangle slipped between the cracks in the vent and transformed gracefully into bird mode. Laserbeak flew down to perch on the edge of the berth and started scanning Frenzy's arms.

"Just wanna give your punch back," Rumble smirked, "Just in case you need it getting out of here."

Frenzy smirked too as he felt Laserbeak pecking inquisitively away at his elbow joints. The bird-bot cawed softly, and Frenzy tensed his arms at the command, feeling a sharp, burning pain for an instant as Laserbeak fired with pinpoint precision into one of the gaps in Frenzy's armor. He did the same for the other arm. Laserbeak pulled back and cawed again. Frenzy grimaced as he forced his arms to transform into piledrivers.

"Fuckin' Hurts," he gasped.

"Bad?" Rumble frowned.

Shaking his head, Frenzy transformed his arms back. "I'll be able ta use em in a pinch, if I need too. Thanks Beaky." The Cassetticon bird cawed appreciatively, and flew back to the vent. He cawed again, this time it was a summons.

"Well," Rumble sighed, somewhat reluctantly, "Sooner we're all outta this Pit-spawned Pit, the better." He clapped his brother hard on the back. "Give 'em all hell, bro," he paused, and suddenly folded his brother into a quick, violent hug. "And…uh…watch your back," he choked.

"Sure." Frenzy hugged his brother back fiercely, sending silent commands to the thing between them to keep still.

Rumble pulled away and flew up to the vent with only one quick look back. And then he was gone.

But Frenzy wasn't alone. The little fragger in his chest wouldn't let him, or his laser-core, forget that for an astrosecond. As the Decepticon pulled himself back up on the berth, he tried hard to think of how he would ask Rumble for help. Finally he gave up, lay back, and tried to slip into recharge on his own.

In the corner, the sparkling support berth was mocking him.

***

Prime should have known there was trouble the second Red Alert had called for both himself _and_ Ironhide. It was no secret, especially to Optimus, that his two Security chiefs didn't exactly get on. Red Alert either had to have something extremely dangerous or utterly conclusive before he would subject himself to Ironhide's nearly antagonistic scrutiny, without calling in Prime to hear it first. Red Alert always wanted the first word in, to let his arguments settle into the listener's processor before anyone had the chance to try and refute it.

It was hard to get any more conclusive than the scene playing out on the monitor in Red Alert's office though.

If only they had audio.

Of the four mechs in the room only Red Alert didn't look completely crestfallen as they watched Frenzy and Rumble talking together in the corner of the Med Bay. Ironhide looked especially grim. Optimus knew just how he was feeling.

"You're sure we can't get audio?" First Aid asked.

"Of the twelve cameras, of four different designs, and the six audio recorders, only this one camera is not being completely jammed," Red Alert answered. "It seems to be farthest from the jamming signal, and partially shielded by the observation deck."

"What are the other cameras showing?" Prime asked.

Red Alert smiled harshly and flipped the monitor's display to another camera. It showed Frenzy recharging peacefully, Wheeljack's sleep machine on his head. Red switched the camera back. The four mechs watched in silence as Rumble put something in Frenzy's hand before pulling Frenzy out of the camera's frame.

"We should go in there now!" Red Alert cried, "Who knows what they're up too."

"No." Prime and First Aid answered at the same time.

"No," Optimus repeated. "Wait five minutes to see if the jamming quits. Blowing his cover needlessly is the last thing I want to do."

"Ahh, yes!" Red Alert agreed, "The first rule of counter-espionage: never let an enemy's spy know you know what you know."

"Red. Clamp it," Ironhide growled. Red Alert scowled at him, but the room remained quiet until all the electrical feedback that denoted a jamming field had completely dissipated from their sensors. All the cameras in the Med Bay showed Frenzy lying on the berth, curled on his side, tapping absently at his chest. Red Alert seemed about to jump in, but when Ironhide put his hand on Prime's arm, the Security Director remained silent, for the moment.

"Prime," Ironhide started, slowly and carefully. "Let me talk to him."

Optimus looked at Ironhide, and then back to the monitor. "I don't think that you're going to get through, Ironhide," Prime said softly.

"I think, Ironhide, that you may be a little too close to this situation to see objectively anymore." Red Alert's high-strung voice was almost bordering on sympathetic, which somehow infuriated Ironhide more. "It looks like the Decepticon has long ago made up his mind."

"He's just a kid!" Ironhide whirled on Red Alert. "Dammit, Red! Take yer twitchy processor outta your aft! A kid! Can't you see that?"

"Ironhide," Optimus reprimanded.

"Please," Ironhide's voice was low, and grave, "Give me a chance. It ain't just him I'm thinkin' about." There was almost a plead in Ironhide's voice that First Aid was quick to pick up on and amplify.

"Please," the Autobot doctor agreed, "Prime, let us at least try. You know what he's been through. We all do. That wasn't a lie he told us."

Ironhide shot a deadly, shocked glare at Red Alert. _He knows?_ The Lamborghini crossed his arms over his chest and glared right back.

"I had to, Ironhide," Prime explained, "He's Security Director. He needed to know."

His only answer a sigh. Ironhide dropped his arm and turned away from Optimus. Once again, Red Alert seemed about to speak, but Prime silenced him with a look.

"Ironhide," the Autobot leader started, "You can try to talk to him first. Drawing this out and hoping to gain the upper hand…we just can't, not this time. So tell him that we know. Try to make him see, if you can."

Ironhide nodded, gratefully. "Thanks Optimus," he mumbled.

"But Ironhide," Prime's eyes were stern and bright, "If you can't get him to tell you what they were planning, I'm going to have to send in Red Alert. I'm sorry."

"I understand," the old, red mech replied tensely as he walked out of Red Alert's office, his shoulders held hunched and tight.

His thoughts both grim and yet blank, Ironhide took his time getting to Med Bay. He felt like a dark cloud had sunk deep into his spark. Chromia's words echoed in his processor, _'Do what you can. I know you will. You're too soft to let this go.'_

_Somehow, someway, I gotta make the kid see…_Ironhide clenched his fists._ Slag, how did this get so complicated?_ His face was grim as he reached Med Bay. He stood outside the doors for a long time, gathering up all his reserves of strength and of patience. He willed the deep pang in his spark to go away, but it wouldn't. His processor coughed up an image from a few days ago. Frenzy sitting on the berth, arms wrapped around his helm, knees drawn up tight. Shaking.

It wasn't a lie, First Aid had said, with the surety of a doctor. And Ironhide was sure, too.

Allowing himself one last, deep sigh, Ironhide opened the door.

Frenzy was on the berth, his hand on his chest. He sat up when he saw the look on the big, red mech's face.

"Kid," Ironhide started, his voice stern, "We need to talk. Now."


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: Holy Sweet Slaggin' Primus on a Pogostick! Plot actually continues in this story? Whooda thunk?

You like the sudden arrival of action and things? Let me know with reviews or messages. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far, your words are love.

****

While Frenzy knew he was in trouble when he saw the expression on Ironhide's faceplates as the big, red mech entered the Med Bay, it wasn't until Ironhide pulled up his seat and sat down so they were at eye level to each other that Frenzy knew he was in _big_ trouble.

Smiling as apologetically as he could, Frenzy started to explain."Hey, I'm sorry 'bout not telling you where--"

"You wanna tell me what the hell is goin' on?" Ironhide's voice was hard, tight, and inscrutable. Frenzy had never seen the Autobot so carefully restrained, and it scared the slag outta the Decepticon.

"I'm tryin' to tell you," Frenzy half-snapped, half-wheedled, "I didn't wanna interrupt your game--"

"What the _Pit_ was Rumble doin' in here earlier?" This question snapped a little bit more, as if Ironhide was already losing his control.

Frenzy's optic band flashed in fear, but his face set into a stiff glare. Though he momentarily had the impulse to try his newly freed piledrivers, there was a whisper from deep in his subconscious telling him to wait. Too stunned by shock and fear to wrestle his jumbled emotions into a plan, Frenzy could only cross his arms over his chest, lean back, and stubbornly retreat.

Ironhide waited a full minute before beginning his interrogation anew. The rigid control in his voice offered him a shield between the emotions turning inside him and how he needed to say this. But if the kid kept stonewalling him Ironhide wasn't sure how much longer he could keep those emotions in check. "We saw you two on the cameras. Optimus, Red Alert, First Aid; we all saw it. There ain't no use pretendin' it didn't happen."

Frenzy's spark was thrumming in his chest, his every system was screaming to flee. Retreat seemed hardwired in the Decepticon's processor; but he kept his glare even, staring straight ahead, and he kept silent.

"What's going on?" Ironhide repeated, with more force.

Silence was the only reply.

"Listen, kid," the Autobot's voice dropped a notch, "You don't tell me what's going on, right now, and we're gonna have no choice but ta lock you up again. You'll be watched every wakin' and restin' moment from here on out, and not just by me. And that's after Red Alert comes in to try and pry this same stuff from ya, and I'm tellin' ya kid, he ain't just gonna let this go. You give him the silent treatment, and he'll question you till you're run ragged. And after you're rested up he'll just do it all again. He won't quit. Make things easy on yourself and tell me."

Frenzy only settled firmer into his posture.

"You were planning an escape, weren't you?" Ironhide rumbled.

The Mini-Cassette pouted, and scratched at his arm uneasily. Ironhide considered the chances that he'd hit it close to the mark. An escape was likely, no matter what else they'd had planned, and he needed _something_ to work off of.

"Primus kid, how the Pit can you be thinking of escaping _now_? You wouldn't get farther than I could kick you into the wind."

The Decepticon's glower deepened, but he remained silent.

Sighing hotly, Ironhide ran one black hand over the crest of his helm in frustration as he leaned in closer. "Almost six weeks, and you'd throw that all away to go back to _them_." Sadness crept into Ironhide's anger.

"Whada you mean?" Frenzy frowned.

"It'll die Frenzy. You go back now and the sparkling's as good as done."

"You don't know that." The Cassetticon spat as he tapped his chest anxiously.

"Dammit kid!" Desperate, frustrated anger strained Ironhide's words, "Didn't you do yer homework? There's only one mech in the known universe that coulda given your sparkling more than half a chance, and by luck or Primus you ended up here where he could do it. Doesn't matter if your bosses pull the plug or not, you leave and you might as well sign the termination notice yourself. If by some miracle it makes it through delivery, it won't last two days. Butchers can't raise babies."

A tense pause. "So _you'll_ take it from me then?" Frenzy accused.

"Things aren't all about _you_ anymore!" Ironhide paused with a ragged sigh, getting a hold of himself, if only for the moment, "Slaggit kid, is it any wonder we might take it from you when you're willing to risk it again and again?" Ironhide pointed right at Frenzy's chest. "This is _your_ sparkling. Nobody else's. It's time for you kick things outta cruise control and start taking responsibility for it. 'Cause it needs somebody, and if you want it to be _you,_ ya damn well better start acting like it."

Frenzy didn't answer, but his frown had turned troubled. Ironhide gave things a moment to settle in.

"You don' have to worry about _them_ Frenzy. They can't hurt you if you stay. You're safe here." He coaxed.

"I'm a Decepticon surrounded by slaggin' Autobots; I haven't been safe since I got here." Frenzy spat defiantly.

"You're not safe with the Decepticons either." Ironhide fumed.

Finally the Mini-Cassette turned to look at the Autobot. "What do you mean?"

"What do you think I mean?" More and more of Ironhide's emotions were spilling into his words, but he didn't have the strength to hide it, not about this. "Dammit kid. How can you—how is it you can even think about going back to him after what he's done to you?"

"What are you talking about?" Frenzy shrunk in on himself, glaring warily. Ironhide had to look away, his fists clenched tightly. He couldn't find it within himself to answer. "You…You know. Don't you?" The Decepticon's voice was thick with accusation.

"It was a security matter Frenzy, I had to know." Ironhide replied softly.

"It was none of your fuckin' business is what it was!" Frenzy raged.

"Frenzy, you can't keep pretending like it didn't happen. Primus, the evidence is right _there_…"

"Shut up!"

"And if you go back, the same thing will just happen again. Pit knows how many times."

"Shut! Up!"

"Frenzy. How could you go back to _that_?"

"You don't know _shit_!" Frenzy spat, emphasizing each word. "It wasn't like that! I didn't say no! I never said no!"

"Kid," Ironhide's faceplates were lined with deep pain, "That doesn't make it right."

Crossing his arms tightly over his chest, Frenzy stared straight ahead, setting his faceplates into a dark, nearly murderous, glare. His optic band was flaring; he was practically shaking with rage that he was too stubborn to let out. Ironhide knew that he was close to losing this battle.

"You've got a future here Frenzy. You've _both_ got a future here. Grow up for one astrosecond and for Primus' sake _think_."

Thrusting every thought but indignant wrath away from his mind, Frenzy refused to let a single word sink in. His anger, his barely restrained fury, was a forcefield that kept Ironhide's words blissfully at bay. _Give 'em hell, bro, _Rumble had said. _Oh, I'll give 'em hell,_ Frenzy thought, _just wait till that Red Alert gets in here…_

"Frenzy," Ironhide growled in warning, "This is your _last chance_. Tell me what you and Rumble had planned. For Primus' sake kid, _think _about it."

Frenzy turned to face the Autobot, smiling defiantly. "Go ta _hell_, and take your lube-sucking, cable-tugging Primus with you."

Ironhide stood up abruptly. Frenzy only glared. The Autobot activated his comn. "Red," he said stiffly, "He's all yours."

Giving Frenzy one last hard, but pitying, stare, Ironhide turned to go. Red Alert entered the room as the older Autobot exited. Suddenly Ironhide reached out and gripped the other Security 'Bot's arm. He leaned in close to Red Alert's audial.

"Don' push it too hard Red," he whispered, then left without waiting for a reply. As Red Alert stood over Frenzy's berth, gazing piercingly at the Mini-Cassette, an almost predatory but grim smile twisted the Security Director's features.

"Well Frenzy. I think we have quite a lot to talk about. Don't we?"

The Med Bay door closed and locked. Ironhide stood in the hallway for a full minute before he punched the wall, hard. The loud clang echoed through the empty hall. Then the broad, red Autobot stalked down toward the Control Room, his head slung low, his fists clenched tightly at his sides.

Inside the Med Bay, Red Alert wasn't having any more luck than Ironhide, but he was a lot calmer about it.

"We already know quite a bit Frenzy. We know that you have been contacted before today." He started. "We know that Rumble has given you a device. Soon we will know what the device is. If you do not tell us _all_ that you have been ordered to do, and _all_ that you were planning, you will lose _all_ of the privileges that you were granted. Not only will you be confined to this Med Bay, you will be confined to this very berth. A guard will be present in here at all times, either myself, Prowl or Jazz. And no television."

Frenzy stared straight ahead, arms still stubbornly crossed. _I'm not sayin' anything,_ he repeated to himself for the umpteenth time. _He didn't say they knew 'bout my drivers…._

"If you continue to refuse to talk following your delivery you will be confined to your cell. You will have no contact with anyone save myself or Prime. Your sparkling, should it survive, will be taken into our custody and you will be allowed no contact with it either."

Whirling on Red Alert, Frenzy's frown turned from harsh and stubborn to shocked and panicked.

"You…you wouldn't," he stammered.

Red Alert smiled. His optics were sad but hard. "We could hardly trust a Decepticon spy with a fragile sparkling."

"But it's _mine_."

"Ah yes, of course." The Security Director's smile grew as he pressed the issue. "But then, its Megatron's too, now isn't it? Perhaps we should let _him_ have it? If you're a fit parent, than he _certainly_ is."

Frenzy's piledrivers were out before he even had time to think. The Mini-Cassette yelled, both pain and anger twisting together in his voice. Red Alert's optics flashed in surprise, and he started trying to back away, but before he could take two steps one of Frenzy's drivers slammed with full force into his waist joint, just below where his hood met the rest of his torso. Red Alert's look of astonishment wilted away as he dropped in a limp pile onto the floor. _Reset relay,_ Frenzy smirked as his piledrivers transformed away, _gets 'em every time._

Hopping off the berth, Frenzy took a couple kicks at his offline enemy. A quick look down at the monitor on his chest reassured him that he was still high in the green. His every circuit buzzed with the excitement of fleeing; and his sparkling seemed excited by it too, judging by the way it was twisting around. But Frenzy knew the fight and fury in him wouldn't last for long. He had to do this fast.

He jogged over to the door and looked up at the doors controls. After pushing a few buttons and getting no response Frenzy grimaced and forced himself to transform his arms into piledrivers again. A few hard whacks at the controls and the door's jamb, and Frenzy had it open enough to flee. The dumb Autobots hadn't even set any alarms on it.

Frenzy jogged through the orange hallways, wracking his datatracks for the location of the Control Room. He made the first three turns easily, but when he came to a T-intersection he was unsure again, and stood for a moment. His energon pump was pounding twice as hard as usual, and the squirming in his chest hadn't settled down. _Which way? Which way? Which way?_

"Heya Frenzy!" a chipper, friendly voice called from behind him, "Where ya headed?"

Whirling around, Frenzy found himself facing Bumblebee. Sheer, determined desperation gave the Decepticon the will to lie easier than he ever had before.

"Oh, hey Bumblebee," he said casually, "Just trying to find the Control Room again. I'm supposed to meet Ironhide there." Frenzy shrugged helplessly. "But you know these walls…"

The yellow scout laughed and clapped the Mini-Cassette gently on the back. "You'll figure your way around eventually Frenzy. It's down this hall there, and take a left."

"Thanks, I think I can find it now," Frenzy smiled.

"Sure thing, any time." Bumblebee moved down the hall in the other direction. "Cards in the Motor Pool tonight if you want to come," he called over his shoulder.

"Sure!" Frenzy called back as he strolled leisurely down the way Bumblebee had pointed. When he could no longer hear the Autobot's footfalls he broke into a sprint again. _Please let it be empty. Let it be empty…_

When he came to the entrance of the Control Room he paused at the stone pillar again and peeked in.

It wasn't empty.

A huge Dinobot was standing in front of Teletraan 1 watching, of all things, Bonanza. _Slag,_ Frenzy thought to himself. He _had_ to get to that console. Though he didn't know how long it would take for some alarm to be sounded, it didn't take more than half a processor to know that every astrosecond counted. Frenzy drew himself up to his full height, forced his anxiety deep down, and strolled over to Teletraan.

The monstrous Dinobot didn't even turn to look at him. He was too absorbed by what was going on in the show. Frenzy stood next to him, waiting to be noticed. On screen, a man with a gun crept quietly across a darkened bedroom floor.

"Uhhh…" Frenzy started.

"Shhhhhh….Sludge watching," the massive Autobot wheezed, his voice higher pitched than Frenzy was expecting and very childlike. The man on the screen sat down on a bed where a young boy was sleeping. He gently shook him awake.

"Billy." The man on screen said, "Billy." The young boy woke up with a smile. "Hello son."

"Pa!" The boy cried.

"I come back for ya, just like I promised I would." The boy threw his arms around his 'pa.'

"I knew you would pa. I just knew it." The boy cried into his father's neck.

Frenzy made a little coughing sound. "I need to use the Teletraan." Sludge looked down at him.

"You…you…you Rumble?" The Dinobot asked.

"Fren-zy." The Mini-Cassette said his name slowly, pointing to his chest.

Sludge looked very confused and turned back to the screen. "Frenzy….Frenzy blue," he insisted. "Frenzy stay with Autobots now. You stay with Autobots now." The Dinobot once again became absorbed in the show.

"Listen," the man on screen whispered, "Ya gotta pretend you ain't seen me. Ya mustn't tell nobody, hear?" The boy nodded. "Nd this is what I want you ta do…"

Frenzy glanced down at the panel he needed to get to, then back up at the engrossed Dinobot. "Hey, uh, I gotta get into this panel. It's really important. Optimus told me that I could. And stuff."

"Sludge watch TV on Telly-Train. Other Dinobots watch…uhhhh… no let Sludge watch Sludge show." The Dinobot gestured to the screen. "Sludge like Hoss."

"I slaggin' bet you do," Frenzy muttered as he knelt cautiously by the panel and began fiddling with the screws. He was more than surprised with the Dinobot leaned down a little and pulled the whole panel up on its hinges for Frenzy. "Thanks." Frenzy sputtered, waiting for his engine to stop stalling in shock.

"Sludge like Hoss most more." Sludge declared, still staring at the screen.

Frenzy really thought it was going to be harder than this. He thought he might have to at least look for the chip. But there it was, right in front of him, a big square circuit chip labeled World Energy Circuit, bright green and twice as long as his hands. He put his hand right on it. Then he felt a sharp kick right to the laser core that made him pause for a moment. He could hear Ironhide's voice in his processor, entreating him to _think_. He tried to bat the thought away.

"Pa? You didn't tell me where you were all that time." The boy asked. The speaker was right in Frenzy's audial.

"Son, I kept my promise didn't I? Like I said I would," the father answered.

"You sure did, Pa"

"Trust me son. I'll tell you everything later."

A loud, wailing alarm sounding through the whole ship pulled Frenzy out of his doubt. With one hard yank he pulled the circuit chip from the panel.

"I'll be waiting." The father said through the hiss in the dying speaker, "And remember son, this is our secre..."

The whole room went completely black. The alarm died away. The only light in the Control Room came from two sets of optical sensors. And a faint reddish glow tinting one huge doorway. It almost looked like daylight.

"Whaaaa…?" The Dinobot tapped at the Teletraan's console.

"You should go find Prime!" Frenzy cried, as he gripped the World Energy Chip tightly in his hands and sprinted out of the room, toward the reddish light. Sludge turned around slowly in the dark.

"Prime?" the Dinotbot wondered out loud.

Frenzy could have whooped in joy when he realized that the reddish light was, indeed, the exit. He doubled his pace, ignoring the aches from his strained systems. _Just a little more, and I'm home free._

A huge black hand reached out of the dark and grabbed his shoulder. Frenzy's momentum whirled him around, and he was optic band to optic sensor with Ironhide. The tall red Autobot loomed over him, his hand was as solid and unyielding as a titanium clamp.

"Kid! What the hell are you doing!?" Ironhide nearly roared.

Frenzy groaned as his arm transformed into a piledriver. Ironhide let out a sickened 'huuking' noise as the driver connected with the front of his waist joint, but his grip didn't slacken.

"Dammit kid!" Ironhide's other hand swung around, reaching out for Frenzy's pile driver arm, but the Mini-Cassette managed to dodge the grab. The Decepticon swung the driver up and slammed it once, twice, three times into Ironhide's chin, there was a crunching sound on the last impact. Frenzy reached as high as he could and smashed as hard as he could right into the tall Autobot's optics. There was a flash of blue light as the glass on his left optic cracked. Ironhide let go of Frenzy's shoulder and staggered backwards, spitting energon and hydraulic fluid. He fell heavily to his knees.

"Kid…kid…don't ru…" he mumbled through the fluid filling his mouth. Then he collapsed.

Frenzy stared at the Autobot for a moment, watching the energon trickle from his mouth and optic. The sparkling seemed to be throwing a regular fit.

"Dammit. Cut that out!" the Decepticon spat angrily at his chest, gripping the chip tightly in both his hands. "We're going _home_ now!"

Without looking over his shoulder, Frenzy jogged out the open entrance of Autobot Headquarters. The whole sky was glowing red and purple, but the Decepticon had no idea if it was dawn, or dusk. Ditching the road as soon as he could the Mini-Cassette started crashing his way through the forest.

The light dimmed, the sky was purple between the treetops, and Frenzy knew it was dusk.

The monitor on his chest dropped into the yellow.


	21. Chapter 21

Ratchet's headlights shone into the complicated circuitry of Teletraan 1. One hand held up the access panel, the other hand had been replaced with his arc welder. The Autobot medic shook his head at the blackened connections and stripped wires.

"Yeah, he really did a number on these circuits tearing that chip out," the white van sighed somberly in the darkened Control Room. "But that seems to be the only damage, give me a few minutes and I should have things rerouted to our backup generators."

Optimus rested his head in his hand, trying to rub the ache out of his processor. From where he was standing behind Ratchet he could just make out the glow of the soldering iron. The Autobot Leader didn't bother to turn around when they were suddenly backlit by another mech's headlights. Prowl entered, Hoist at his side.

"Ironhide's going to be just fine." Hoist announced. "It's fortunate his head's as hard as the rest of him. Red Alert's already come around and he should be down here soon."

"Prowl?" Optimus glanced at his Second in Command. The black and white mech just shook his head.

"We ran a perimeter, Hound, Mirage and I, but he was nowhere close. If the blackout was when he ran, like Sludge said, then he got a good twenty minute head start on us. Supposing he had help nearby then he could be a hundred miles away by now."

"There we go," Ratchet said, standing up. The lights came back on, though dimly. Prowl was at the console for Teletraan in an astrosecond.

"Sensor array should be up," he reasoned out loud. "Yes. But it's weak, only getting about two point seven miles on it. No sign of him. Though we're getting a lot of interference." The tactician sighed. "We need that chip."

"Wheeljack's already on it." Ratched replied. "He should have the replacement ready in a few hours."

"What did I miss?" The anxious question was out before Red Alert had even driven over the threshold to the Control Room. The Security Director transformed and joined Prowl at the console.

"After he attacked you, Frenzy took the World Energy Chip," Optimus answered. "He attacked Ironhide and escaped."

"Oil rigs, energy and superweapons," Red Alert clucked, "Megatron needs to get some new material." The Lamborghini began rerouting power to try and boost the sensor array. "Who's out there looking for him?"

"No one," Prime answered softly.

Red Alert whirled around. "What?"

"The failsafe was installed in the World Energy Chip after the last time, wasn't it?" Optimus asked.

Prowl and Red Alert nodded in unison.

"Then forcibly removing the chip should have activated the remote failsafe trigger. The circuit would have burned out inside, erasing the data on it and rendering it useless, right?"

Red Alert sill looked unsure. "Yes…but…" The Autobot leader's face was unreadable, his posture unbending.

"Optimus. He's…well what about--" Ratchet started.

Prime shook his head sadly. "It seems…it seems that Frenzy long ago made his decision. I—I can hardly justify risking my soldiers to recapture a single prisoner that poses no real threat to us," he said, trying to convince himself as well as the others.

"So we're just letting him go?" Red Alert was incredulous, almost bordering on angry.

"Red Alert. I don't have a choice," Optimus snapped. "Frenzy made his decision, and he made it as freely as we could let him. It's out of our hands now." The tall Autobot turned away from his soldiers, unable to see the looks on their faces as they slowly realized what Frenzy's decision probably meant.

"We can't help him anymore," Prime said, stiff in sadness. "We can't save them."

***

Frenzy sat with his back to a huge orange boulder and watched the last bluish-purple light fade from the sky. He twirled the homing beacon between his fingers and watched the sky very closely. The World Energy Chip was laid across his lap. The buzz he'd gotten from escaping had worn off almost an hour ago and all he could think about now was getting some energon and a nice long nap.

The sprint from the Autobot base had drained away more than half of his remaining energy, and Frenzy was doing his best to quash his growing fear as every ten minutes the indicator on his chest dipped closer and closer to the red. He shut down as many nonessential systems as he could, and sat very still. Everything was still around him and inside him too.

_They better slaggin' hurry up and get here._ Frenzy had run as far as he dared…he figured somewhere in the ballpark of four miles, and purposely picked a hiding place surrounded by rough terrain. He'd activated the beacon as soon as he'd picked out his spot. And now he was just waiting.

_This is the last fuckin' time I'm playing the waiting game,_ Frenzy grumbled to himself. _After this, I punch first, ask for instructions later. _Scratching at the green computer chip's casing, Frenzy did his best to bite down his fear. He knew he would have to ask for what he wanted pretty soon and the anxiety building in him was a clear indicator that if he only let himself think about it for a second his mind would dream up a thousand different ways it could all go wrong.

_What if they say no?_ Frenzy quickly killed the thought.

A dark shadow blocked out what remained of the dim twilight. Frenzy could just make out the outline of three or four figures swooping in close to the treetops like some flock of vast predatory birds. One was Soundwave, the other was a Seeker. The Mini-Cassette felt his spark sink when he recognized the outline of Megatron. He'd hoped that just Soundwave would come to pick him up. It would have been easier to ask Soundwave first, with Rumble's help.

There was the cracking of tree branches and the groaning of limbs as the three huge mechs, and one much smaller, slipped through the forest canopy and landed near where Frenzy was sitting. Frenzy stood up and brushed himself off. He hugged the chip to himself tightly and made his way quickly over to the Decepticons.

"Boy, that was fast," Rumble rushed to Frenzy's side and slapped him on the back, not able to hide quite all of his concern. "Didn't run into any trouble did ya?"

"A little."

Megatron loomed over the brothers. "Do you have it?"

"Yeah," Frenzy smiled, "I had to lay out a few Autobots ta get it." He held up the chip proudly. "They had a Dinobot guarding the control room."

"Liar," Rumble smirked. Starscream seemly equally unimpressed.

Megatron's sharp faceplates broke out into a wide grin as he stared at the powerful computer chip hungrily. "Excellent Frenzy." He rubbed his large black hands together. "Hand over the chip and then you shall have the honor of leading us on our flight back to Headquarters."

Frenzy's face twisted as he started drumming his fingers across the chip nervously. "Uh…I mean…I can't fly." Megatron paused mid reach. "They took my flight systems out." Megatron waved his reaching hand dismissively.

"Then transform and have Soundwave take you back. I'm sure Starscream will only be too pleased to install new flight systems when we get back." The jet looked annoyed.

Hanging his head a little bit, but still clinging tightly to the chip, Frenzy shook his head, unable to meet Megatron's gaze. "Can't transform either," he mumbled. Megatron's optics narrowed darkly.

"Frenzy, answer," Soundwave's flat voice was like a blade to the spark. "Sparkling still online?"

Frenzy nodded and Megatron's face twisted in disgust. Starscream glanced from the red Mini-cassette to the Decepticon leader, smiling evilly. Rumble was quick to jump to his brother's defense. "He couldn't get 'em to do it. That's all," the Cassetticon explained, "They woulda stopped trusting him, and then he wouldn't have been able to get the chip. That's what's really important, right."

Megatron sighed, no longer looking at Frenzy. He held out his hand for the chip. "Give it here," he growled. "Soundwave, radio headquarters, inform Hook of the…situation. Tell him I want this taken care of immediately when we return." Soundwave nodded.

"W…wwait," Frenzy stuttered, pulling the chip back close to his body. "I mean…I wanna talk about this."

"Frenzy…what are you doing?" Rumble hissed. Megatron was startled for half a second, then his face deepened into a deadly glare, commanding silence.

"Look…the…the Autobot doc said I was only a few days away, a week tops," Frenzy lied, and he knew that Soundwave knew it too, but he continued, "and I was thinking, that, you know…"

"Frenzy!" Rumble sounded both angry and terrified. "Shut the slag up."

"Frenzy." There was a warning in Soundwave's voice. The tapedeck took a step toward the Mini-Cassettes and Frenzy panicked.

"Look. I would take care of it myself. I wouldn't ask for nothin', I wouldn't be in the way. I'd put it wherever you wanted me too." Frenzy clutched the chip tighter to his chest, pleading and avoiding anyone's optics but Megatron's.

Starscream's smile broadened and he removed a scanner from one of his compartments. Grinning ironically he took a few steps forward and quickly scanned Frenzy's chest.

"Oh…it's quite a sparkling, Megatron," Starscream mocked holding out the scanner, "take a look, why it even has your optical sensors. With plenty of good care it might even be seven feet tall when fully grown! What an unparalleled opportunity to pass on your superior cybernetics. "

"Starscream. Shut up," Megatron snapped, slapping the scanner out of the jet's hand. He held his hand out right in front of Frenzy's chest. "Give me the chip now!" he commanded harshly.

Frenzy clung to the World Energy Chip like a lifeline. He started meekly, "But what about--"

"No!" Megatron growled, his voice dripping with revulsion. "Absolutely not."

Frenzy backed away slowly, gripping the chip tightly over his chest. "But…but…but it's yours?"

Megatron stood up with a hiss and turned away. Starscream laughed out loud, a lethal look from the Decepticon leader cut any snide remarks. Rumble gripped Frenzy's shoulders tightly.

"Listen," Rumble commanded in a low voice. "Let it go. Now. I mean it. Please. Frenzy?"

Frenzy shook his brother off, feeling a deep rage building inside him. He took two steps towards Megatron. "Yeah," he snapped, "It's yours. And the Autobots all know it too."

"Frenzy, silence. Now," Soundwave ordered, but Frenzy ignored him, all he could see was his own anger finally pouring out.

"It's yours Megatron. You did this! I didn't fuckin' ask for it, I didn't fuckin' want it--"

"Hand over the chip now." Megatron's voice had turned low and cold. Rumble whimpered without meaning to, Soundwave put a hand on the Decepticon leader's arm, but it was quickly brushed off.

"I want my sparkling," Frenzy protested, desperate and furious.

"No."

Crying out as he transformed one arm to a piledriver, Frenzy held the driver up to the chip in his other hand. "Then you're not getting what you want either," he shouted.

The dark black hand seemed to come out of nowhere. Megatron spun around and struck Frenzy violently, in a vicious backhand that slammed the edge of Megatron's fusion cannon against Frenzy's chest and sent the Mini-Cassette flying. He collided with a tree a dozen feet away, and was vaguely aware of the crackling of the bark and wood around him.

"Frenzy!" Rumble rushed to his brother's side and started trying to pull him upright. Megatron picked up the World Energy Chip from the ground.

"Temper, temper," Starscream taunted. Megatron ignored him.

"Soundwave, we're leaving," The Decepticon Leader growled.

"Frenzy, get up!" Rumble begged. Soundwave reached out and grabbed the purple Mini-Cassette's arm and pulled him off. Then he reached down for Frenzy.

"Soundwave. Leave him," Megatron commanded.

"No!" Rumble wailed, "Frenzy!"

Soundwave paused.

"Soundwave…" Megatron's order had a warning in it this time. "Get a hold of your hysterical creation, and leave the traitor."

It sounded like Rumble's cries were coming from another world entirely to Frenzy's audial receptors. He watched, stunned and uncomprehending as the three huge mechs disappeared into the night. When the last 'Frenzy!' had died away, the little Mini-Cassette had finally come around enough to try and sit up. He reached up, steadying himself with the splintered tree, and pulled himself off the ground.

His world exploded into a universe of pain. Frenzy gave a gasping cry and reached for his chest. Hot, sticky energon oozed from a deep, dented crack in his plating. A faint beeping alarm came from the monitor on his chest. He looked down, he was in the red, far in the red.

He felt a sharp kick, and then twisting that didn't stop. Each movement sent daggers through his chassis. _I've got to get up. I've got to… _Frenzy thought, _I've got to get help._ He groaned as he gripped the tree's bark and pulled himself into a sitting position.

The alarm turned into a wail and Frenzy's processor went as black as the night.


	22. Chapter 22

Frenzy was unaware how long he danced in and out of consciousness, his half-fritzed processor riding the waves of pain nearer and farther from himself. Finally though, the pain turned from sharp to throbbing, and the injured Mini-Cassette slowly became more aware.

The dark forest was silent except for a low beeping coming from the monitor on Frenzy's chest. His head dipped down and he drunkenly dragged one hand over to the dented, energon-stained monitor. There was little more than a few centimeters of dark, flashing red left. Frenzy scratched at it.

There was a shift inside him; faint, weak, yet painful. Frenzy groaned and hunched over, the fire dancing across his dented, cracked chest flaring to life again.

"Ha..Hang on--" Frenzy slurred, as he reached above him, gripping a branch. "Gotta…get—I'll get us—Argh!" Pulling on the branch had sent his entire chest into a spasm, Frenzy groaned and pulled harder, trying to get himself standing. He nearly was upright when the branch broke. Whimpering, bending in on himself, he leaned heavily against the tree, the only sounds his low gasping moans and the beeping of the monitor.

He took two steps away from the splintered tree before he felt his legs give out under him. He fell to his knees, choking back a cry, then caught himself as he started slipping sideways. Somehow Frenzy dragged himself back to the base of the trunk. He pressed his back tight against it as a new wave of pain spread out from his chest. He felt the bark of the tree splinter under his grasping fingers as he dug into it, trying to swallow his moans until the spasms finally passed. Leaving only the echoes of pain. The twinges in his chest died down as well. Frenzy rested, waiting to gather up enough energy to try again. But after a while he realized he hardly had enough energy to stay conscious, and the little he had was quickly dripping away.

No one was coming for him; not this time. They were completely alone.

Frenzy felt another faint twist. "I know," he choked, "I know. I really—I really fucked this up." He reached up for a branch again, but there was nothing above him to hold onto. The beeping seemed quieter now. The pain also died down. Frenzy was starting to feel numb all over.

"I—I really fucked this up," he groaned in a whisper. As his numbness increased so did the painful fluttering in his chest, but rather than encourage him it only deepened his despair. It meant that it was dying.

It meant that he was dying.

The little sparkling berth, the toys, the quarters, the kicks and wiggles, the scans and energon lines; they all seemed to hover right in front of him, taunting him. It could have lived. He could have had it. But he'd fucked it all up.

He'd done this to them. To it.

And now they were both going to die. Alone.

It didn't seem fair. Some part of Frenzy knew that he probably deserved everything he was getting and more. But the sparkling deserved better; it had always deserved better. It deserved a chance, a life, someone that would care about it the right way, and would take care of it. It had deserved a better creator than Frenzy, a better sire than Megatron.

And Frenzy had _never_ deserved it in the first place.

"I'm sorry." Frenzy choked out, his hand finding its way to the wound on his chest. "I'm so… so sorry. I really fucked this all up."

The fluttering had grown fainter, almost imperceptible and Frenzy began tapping at his chest gently. It was dying first. But…but at least _it_ wouldn't die alone.

"I'm sorry." He murmured. "You—you didn' deserve this." He hung on to each twitch inside him, both hands resting over the energon stained chest. Frenzy's whole body curled around himself painfully, as if trying to embrace what he would never get to hold.

As the movements inside him grew weaker and weaker, Frenzy's spark began to cry out for someone, anyone, to see them, just to _see_ them. He couldn't be alone for this; not for _this_. Not while it died inside him because he'd been too stupid and selfish to care about his own sparkling more than himself.

His head craned back and he found a few bright stars in the black sky. _We hope Primus is watching over you, _Bumblebee had said. Frenzy had scoffed at that. Never once, in his entire life, had he thought Primus was watching anyone. Was he watching when Frenzy had slagged that room of humans? Was he watching when that stupid space ship had crashed into that stupid mountain? Or when Megatron had done what he'd done?

Was he watching now?

"Hey. You." Frenzy's voice sounded strange, talking at stars, but he was too numb and hopeless to care. "Look. I know—I really, really screwed--" a tiny kick made Frenzy sob. "Look. I—just," The Mini-Cassette's face twisted as he stared up at stars, pleading. "I'm—I'm sorry. About fuckin' everything, okay? Jus'— just take care of it. Wherever it's going…"

Staring up at the stars, Frenzy felt a tiny whisper deep in his spark, a nearness of something or someone not himself. A nearness of love. Inside his despair Frenzy felt just a little peace. Wherever it was going, at least it would be loved. He wasn't so sure about himself, but he didn't care anymore.

He tapped at his chest gently, treasuring each weak movement. "I'm here," he whispered to his sparkling, "I'm here. It's okay, you're not alone."

"I'm—I'm your dad." Frenzy choked. The stillness inside him was growing. The numbness was threatening to overcome him completely.

"I'm here." Frenzy sobbed quietly. "I love you. I'm here."

***

Ironhide always hated waking up in Med Bay. No matter how beat up he got in a fight, nothing infuriated him more than suddenly realizing that he'd succumbed to unconsciousness. So when the old, red mech had rebooted staring up at the high, orange ceiling and listening to the chirping of monitoring equipment, he was already understandably in a pretty bad mood.

His mood certainly didn't improve when he remembered what had put him here in the first place. Not bothering to run a diagnostic first, Ironhide sat up with a grunt and swung his legs over the side of the berth. His whole processor lagged for a moment, hissing and groaning sluggishly. Half the world was splintered and blurry, and it took Ironhide a second to realize that his optic sensor hadn't been fixed yet. He shut the broken sensor down, clearing up his vision considerably.

First Aid was at his side in a moment, a steadying hand on the older Autobot's shoulder. "Easy Ironhide," the doctor cautioned. "Easy."

"Is that all you medics know how ta say? Easy?" Ironhide grumbled. He waved the hand off and stood up, leaning one hand against the berth to steady himself as his hydraulics readjusted. "Now where's that damn kid?"

First Aid twiddled with the scanner in his hand, his shoulders hunched. "No…no one knows." He answered softly.

"Whadda ya mean? He got away?" First Aid nodded tensely. Ironhide straightened up, his clearing processor still throbbing as connections realigned themselves. "Well, who's out there lookin' for him?" First Aid wandered over to another berth, tweaking this and that nervously as he passed.

"No one." He replied finally.

"Whadda ya mean no one?" Ironhide's shock quickly morphed into anger. "No one at all?" The doctor shook his head. Ironhide willed away his dizziness and marched right over to the other Autobot. "Where's Prime?" he growled.

"Control Room, I think." First Aid perked up a little bit; Ironhide's determined question giving him a glimmer of hope.

"Come on." Ironhide barked as he strode purposefully from the Med Bay.

As the two mechs entered the Control Room, the sight of Optimus Prime hunched over Teletraan let Ironhide know that while finding the Autobot Leader had been easy, convincing him was going to be another matter entirely. The Security 'bot didn't waste an astrosecond. Ignoring Red Alert, Prowl, and Ratchet, he marched right up behind Prime and crossed his arms imperviously over his windshield. Optimus stiffened slightly, and Ironhide knew that the other mech knew he was there.

"Ya wanna do this out here, or in yer office? Ya got two seconds." Ironhide didn't bother to lower his voice.

Optimus turned his head to one side, but didn't face Ironhide. "I've made my decision Ironhide." Prime was firm, but quiet.

"Well, ya made the wrong one." Everyone in the Control Room had stopped what they were doing to watch. When Prime finally turned around Ironhide wasn't the least bit surprised to see pain and conflict trying to hide behind the sternness in the Autobot Leader's optics.

"We ran a perimeter. We checked our sensor array. Ironhide, he's nowhere close." Optimus said, calmly.

"I don' give a Con's exhaust vent if he's halfway to the moon. We should be goin' after him."

"They didn't kidnap him; Frenzy escaped on his own. You know that better than anyone. He's not their prisoner, he was _ours_. He doesn't have any classified information. He isn't carrying anything of value." Prime winced when he realized what he'd just said. "I didn't it mean like that…"

"Like hell you didn't." Ironhide gnashed.

"Ironhide." Optimus warned.

"You'd let him go back to that?" Ironhide was furious now. "You'd let them kill his kid? You'd let him go back to killin' and fightin'? Optimus, you'd really let him go back to getting fragged up by Megatron whenever the Pitspawned glitchhead feels like it?!"

There was a sharp gasp from First Aid. "Ironhide!"

Both Ratchet and Prowl's faceplates showed the same expression of shocked disgust. "Megatron?" the Autobot medic stammered. "Primus."

"That information doesn't leave this room, understood?" Optimus Prime intoned. Slowly he turned back to Teletraan. "Frenzy made his choice freely."

"Yer the _Leader_, Prime." Ironhide was still fuming. "There's some choices that ya don't gotta let 'em make."

"This discussion is over. My decision stands." Prime put his back to Ironhide and began working on Teletraan again. "I'm not ordering anyone to go after Frenzy. That is final."

"Fine." Ironhide barked, then turned and marched out of the Control Room. The room was completely silent in his wake. After a moment First Aid followed. After a few minutes Red Alert also slipped out.

The Autobot medic joined Optimus in front of Teletraan. He knelt at the base of the computer, screwdriver in hand. "You think he's gonna go after him?" Ratchet asked softly.

"Primus, I hope so." Optimus said quietly.

Ironhide grabbed First Aid's shoulder and pulled him in close the second they were both out of the Control Room.

"Ironhide?" the Autobot doctor asked.

"You know as well as I do Aid, this ain't what the kid really wants. Six weeks and all that stuff…"

"I know Ironhide."

"Then you know what we gotta do?" First Aid nodded. Ironhide smiled grimly. "Good, then let's go. I don' think Prime would stop us, but I'm not too sure about Red."

The two Autobots transformed and quickly began rolling for the exit to Headquarters. They were almost out into the night when they heard a familiar, neurotic voice call out after them.

"Halt!" Ironhide hit his brakes and spun around. He was bumper to bumper with Red Alert.

"Ya can't stop us Red." Ironhide growled, threatening. He revved his engine.

The Security Director rolled a few feet back. "Oh, I wouldn't dream of it Ironhide. Especially since you have almost no chance of finding the Decepticon by yourselves anyway."

"Whadda you mean?"

The fire chief's Lamborghini coasted forward till they were bumper to bumper again. "Only two Autobots, no long range OR short range scanners, no schematics of the surrounding country side. One of you half blind. Why, you don't have a scraplet's chance in a hurricane of finding Frenzy, even if he's within ten miles."

"We'll take our chances." First Aid said. "We've got to try."

"By all means...I've no intention of stopping you." Red Alert answered, pulling ahead of both of the other Autobots. "Quite to the contrary infact…"

***

The black sky had begun to turn grey, outlining each dark tree against the horizon. It was getting close to dawn. In a few minutes the morning birds would begin to sing, but for now the only sound was the wind blowing through bent and cracked branches, and now and then, a hardly audible beep.

A bird flitted from the top of a nearby pine and landed on a dark stain in the orangish dirt. Hopping cautiously, pecking at the ground, it made its way to a black metal foot that was motionless on the forest floor. Something shining caught the bird's attention and it fluttered up onto the unmoving robot's chest, landing on a finger curled near a pink stained gash in the metal plating. The bird pecked at the shining red light that pulsed slowly on the monitor on Frenzy's chest. The monitor beeped, frightening the bird away. As the grey sky continued to gradually brighten, Frenzy remained motionless, propped up against the splintered tree.

The sound of heavy footfalls, and the cracking of broken branches scared any remaining birds away. A tall grey figure made its way up the hill and into the clearing, bright lights flashed this was and that in the pale half-light. It paused for a moment beside the boulder, looking around. When it spotted Frenzy on the ground it dashed over to his side.

"Ironhide. First Aid." Red Alert called as he pressed the comm. button on his chest. "I've found him. You better get here quick." He put his hand on the unconscious Mini-Cassette's arm. "Hang on Frenzy." Red Alert said gently.

Ironhide came to the clearing a few minutes later. His momentary relief melted away as he crouched by Red Alert. "Primus…" the old red mech whispered, his tanks turning at the sight of the injured Cassetticon."Go get First Aid. And hurry." Ironhide commanded. Red Alert was gone in an instant.

"Kid." Ironhide called gently, reaching out to grip Frenzy's shoulder. "Frenzy. Come on kid." The Autobot's communicator hissed to life.

"Ironhide, Red Alert just found me. I'm making my way to your location," First Aid said through the speaker. "Do you think you can get him down the hill?"

"Yeah." Ironhide grunted. "I think so." As gently as he could Ironhide lifted the Mini-Cassette to his chest and stood, cradling the limp mech close. The jostling finally roused Frenzy into half-consciousness. The red optic visor flickered to life and looked up into two blue optics, one bright and shining the other dark and cracked.

"I-Ironhide?" Frenzy wheezed, trembling.

"I'm here kid." Ironhide answered, carefully adjusting his grip as he started down the hill.

"Wha—wha' th' hell are you doin' 'ere?"

"Didn't think I was gonna let you get away that easy, did ya?" Ironhide said tenderly, looking down at Frenzy. The Mini-Cassette grimaced painfully, then buried his face weakly into Ironhide's windshield.

"It's gone Ironhide." Frenzy half whispered, half sobbed. "It's gone."

Ironhide felt like a blade had gone right through his spark. _Primus, he was holding so much pain_. He cradled Frenzy closer, holding him secure as they finally made it down the hill. "It's okay, kid." Ironhide soothed. "It'll be okay."

"It's my fault." Frenzy moaned. "It's gone."

"It'll be okay kid." Ironhide tried his hardest to reassure. "We got ya now. You'll be fine." The little mech in his arms only gave an exhausted cry of anguish and curled his fist right over Ironhide's windshield, right over his spark. "I'm sorry kid." Ironhide murmured as Frenzy slipped into unconsciousness again. He ran a thumb over the young mech's pained faceplate. "Kid. I'm so sorry," he whispered.

First Aid and Red Alert rolled around the base of the hill. First Aid had a scanner out almost the second he transformed. "Primus…" the Protectobot half swore, half prayed, as he scanned the Mini-Cassette in Ironhide's arms.

"He…he was online a minute ago." Ironhide said.

"What did he say?" Red Alert asked.

"He said that it was dead. The sparkling." Ironhide's arms tightened around the unconscious Decepticon.

"And how did he say it?"

"What?" Ironhide asked.

First Aid repeated his question. "When he said the sparkling was dead, how did he sound?"

"Like his spark'd been ripped in half." Ironhide spat, not understanding.

First Aid slapped his scanner shut and turned to Red Alert. "Red. I want you to get back to base as fast as you can. Radio Ratchet, Wheeljack, Perceptor and Hoist. Tell them to prep _everything_ in the Med Bay tell them all to be standing by." Red nodded, and was gone in the grey morning. First Aid transformed and opened up his back hatch.

"Load him up _carefully_ Ironhide," the Autobot doctor instructed. Ironhide did his best to be as gentle as possible as he slid the Decepticon into the ambulance.

"Aid…is the sparkling really dead?" Ironhide asked, afraid of the answer, but unable to quash his faint hope. The back hatch closed with a slam.

"We need to hurry." First Aid said tensely before speeding out in a cloud of orange dust.

***

A/N: Thanks so much for all the feedback for the last chapter! You all seemed to enjoy the cliffhanger so much that I thought I'd give you another. Please let me know what I'm doing right, and what I'm doing wrong!


	23. Chapter 23

A/N: FINALLY AN UPDATE! I am sooooo sorry folks that this was so long in coming. I really intended to get this update up BEFORE my finals, but then finals came up so fast, and I said...gotta put school first THIS TIME. (Last time, putting robot Mpreg first didn't work out so well.) But then AFTER my finals I crashed my car, and THEN my laptop screen decided to die. But here we are finally, update city. Thank you all for your patience and support, especially those who cared enough to message me to make sure I hadn't been abducted by aliens. (I hadn't.)

Ironhide was more of a pacing 'Bot really, but this time was different. Pacing indicated that the Autobot was allowing himself to feel some hope in the situation, rather than wrestling with himself to push his faint hopes down. The old red mech sat on the floor, facing the door to the Med Bay observatory, feeling the hours tick away, unable to watch the medics work, but unable tear himself from the observatory door.

Each few minutes brought a new clumsy attempt at a prayer, no particular plea hitting the right buttons to let Ironhide feel like he'd been heard, so a few minutes later he would try again. He no longer cared or asked himself how he'd gotten so tangled up in all of this. Watching the door alone, he knew that each prayer was a plea to give him half a chance to knot himself in it further.

It was not knowing that was killing him. The ride back to base First Aid had quickly outpaced him, and the doctor hadn't communicated with the Security 'Bot any further. Ironhide knew better than to distract him, as First Aid was probably communicating with the Med Bay at Headquarters over his radio.

The news, or at least some version of it, had beaten Ironhide back to Headquarters, and by the time he rolled in the whole base was pensive. Bots mulled around each other gloomily, sharing shreds of rumor in hushed tones. Whatever their mixed feelings had been before, the ups and downs of the last day had battered most of the Autobots into a general agreement that despite Frenzy's crimes the carrying Mini-Cassette certainly hadn't deserved coming back in an ambulance. Beneath the common sadness at the likely lost sparkling and its injured parent, a grumble of outraged anger built force.

Ironhide was mostly oblivious to all this, having gone directly to the observatory door as soon as he'd gotten back. No one had sought him out, leaving it up to Red Alert to manage the rumor mill for a while. Mainly by pulling Bumblebee aside and telling him as much of the facts as seemed relevant. By the time Red Alert found Ironhide in the hallway the most correct version of the story thus far was making its rounds.

Ironhide cocked his head to the side, watching as the red and white Lamborghini stopped to stand next to the sitting mech.

"Any news?" Red Alert asked.

Ironhide shrugged and gestured to the door. "If ya really wanna know you can go in."

"Why don't you?"

Ironhide shook his head and rubbed at his optic sensors, feeling the hairline cracks in the sensor that was still broken. Red Alert walked up to the observatory door and put his hand on the doors controls, but he paused. After a moment he dropped his hand and walked back over to the older mech still sitting on the floor. Red Alert slid down the wall to take a seat opposite the door, far enough away from Ironhide so that the mech had to crane his head forward to catch the Security Director's expression.

"Why'ja do it, Red?" Ironhide asked finally.

"What?"

Ironhide leaned back again; he nodded toward the door. "You been suspicious of that kid since the second that we brought him in here, why'ja help us look for 'im?"

Red Alert steepled his fingers in his lap, tapping them together. Then he shrugged. "There was no way you would have found Frenzy without my help."

"I know that. But it doesn't answer my question."

Continuing to tap his fingertips together, the smaller mech frowned thoughtfully. "I may be suspicious by nature, I know," he stated at last, "It's my duty to champion the worst possible scenarios, to lend credence to theories of duplicity and bad intent." Sighing he dropped his fidgety hands onto his knees, "But that doesn't mean that I don't fervently hope that I will be proven wrong. And in spite of my suspicions-- which are now confirmed I may add-- I never wished Frenzy or his sparkling any ill. Quite the opposite in fact..." Red Alert bowed his helm, "I had hoped, prayed even, to be proven wrong in this instance more than any other. And then, after I..." He met Ironhide's optics. "There are some things that are just too precious to give up lightly. As long as there was any hope of finding him, of convincing him, I had to pursue it. Just as you did."

Ironhide nodded, resting his helm against the wall behind him. "Well," he said, almost gruffly, "Thank you. That kid in there, if he...Well, he's gonna owe you, a lot. Everythin' really."

"Which I'm sure will infuriate him to no end."

"Primus, I hope so, Red." The boxy mech crossed his arms over his windshield. "Ya think we're gonna keep buttin' heads over him? I imagine if he pulls..." Ironhide coughed, "I mean, you're gonna want to be puttin' him on a pretty short leash."

Red Alert smiled wryly. "Oh, certainly. I never said that I would _trust_ him. He is still a potential danger."

"'S yer job, huh?" Ironhide snorted. "To be a suspicious aft."

"And it's only taken you seven million years to figure it out," Red rejoined. Both mechs fell silent, and quickly the mood in the hallway turned solemn again. Neither of them could push what was going on behind that door out of their processors for long.

The sound of heavy footsteps caused the two Security 'Bots to look down the hall. Optimus Prime stopped in front of the two seated mechs. His head was slung low over bowed shoulders, and Ironhide knew from experience that he'd been brooding.

"Any news?" the Autobot Leader asked.

Both mechs gestured to the door. "Take a look yourself if you want to know," Red Alert replied.

Optimus walked to the door and put his hand on it. His head drooped as he paused silently.

Finally he came back and took his seat next to Ironhide and Red Alert facing the door.

Ironhide couldn't help but laugh inside at the dark irony. Six weeks ago Frenzy had been just another sawed-off Decepticon punk. And now here was Optimus Prime all torn up over the Mini-Cassette and his sparkling. Ironhide noted Optimus' somber expression, the tightness in the knuckles of his motionless hands. _Six weeks ago, who'd'a thought? Prime all torn up over a Decepticon sparkling,_ Ironhide thought, _Megatron's sparkling_.

Ironhide sighed and dropped his arms to his sides from where they'd been clamped tight across his chest, settling back into his long wait. Clumsily he began another earnest prayer. The other two mechs in the room were silent, as they were doing the same.

There was a low murmuring. Quiet and continuous, like a conversation heard through a wall. As Frenzy's processor gradually came back online the sounds became more distinct and more familiar, though he still had no idea what was being said. It was voices, human voices, and beneath the voices was music. Someone was watching TV, very quietly. Mixed with the sound of the TV was the soft whirring and pinging of nearby machines.

Frenzy unconsciously fought waking up, wishing only to slip back into the wonderful, dreamless sleep that he'd been having, but his growing consciousness included becoming aware of a couple dozen aches and pains that only got sharper and harder to ignore as the time went on. His whole body throbbed, his processor, his joints, his cydralics his plating. His chest.

His visor came online, and Frenzy stared up at the high orange ceiling of the Autobot Medbay. His sensors tingled, only half registering, like they'd been turned down or blocked somehow. Everything, even his own thoughts, felt cold, muffled, and deadened. Slowly one hand inched its way onto his chestplate and through the sensor haze fingered the smooth bumps and jagged edges of fresh welds crisscrossing his chest.

There was stillness inside him, a hollow void that ached more than anything else, and Frenzy knew that his sparkling was gone. His visor flickered off, but his hand remained on the new scars. Frenzy begged himself to forget, if only for a few more minutes. He was just too tired to go through it now. For once his processor obeyed, and he slipped into sad, exhausted thoughtlessness.

A hand rested on his numb shoulder. His optic band flickered back on, and Frenzy looked up at First Aid hovering over him, managing to express tender concern with nothing more than a tilt of his head.

"Frenzy?" First Aid asked gently.

"You-you're not…gonna ask me…if I'm feeling alright?" Frenzy croaked.

"_Are_ you?"

"Slag no," Frenzy slurred. First Aid's grip on his shoulder tightened, but Frenzy could have sworn that, somehow, he smiled. Frenzy let his head flop sideways. Ironhide was kicked back in a chair a few feet away, deep in recharge. "How long 'ave I been outta it?"

"Nearly a day." First Aid followed Frenzy's line of sight, "Ironhide's been here since you got out of surgery."

"Fer security?" Frenzy joked weakly.

"You'll have to ask him when he wakes up," First Aid replied. The Autobot Doctor pulled a chair over and sat down. Frenzy stared up at the ceiling, tracing the welds on his chest with a limp hand. "Frenzy, there's something I need to tell you," First Aid started.

"It didn't make it, did it?" Frenzy mumbled tightly, already sure of the answer.

"No! No, not that Frenzy." First Aid reassured, taking Frenzy's arm. "No, I was going to say that we had to deliver you. But your sparkling is stable. She's really doing quite well, considering."

"Wha--" Frenzy's head flopped sideways again. His optic visor searched the room, then First Aid's inscrutable faceplates. He clumsily replayed First Aid's words, struggling to let them sink into his numbed processor. "It…it's alive?"

"Yes," First Aid affirmed, gripping Frenzy's hand. "Yes, she's right over there." He pointed across the room, where the sparkling support berth was. Frenzy stared at the berth, wondering if he was going to wake up. This couldn't be real. This couldn't really be happening. He couldn't take his optics off the tiny berth across the room. He felt a turning in his tanks of some wild mix of fear he'd never felt before.

"Sh…she?" He stammered. "I—I have—a she?" His arm swung over and pointed, wavering. "She?"

First Aid couldn't suppress a quiet laugh, and he nodded his head. "Yes, a little femme. She's really very lovely."

"And—and she's there, she's all there? Over there? I—a she? She's alive?" The shock was warring with his worn out body and mind. Frenzy's thoughts were as jumbled as his words. There was a _sparkling_ across the room. A _living_ sparkling. _His_ sparkling. And it was a _she_.

Finally he stopped trying to absorb it all. He lay motionless on his berth staring across the room. For a moment a shaky, terrified, almost-smile quirked at the corners of his mouth. "She?" He mumbled. The crushing sadness was gone. Completely replaced by a fear even more overwhelming. "Slag," He whispered looking at the berth.

"Would you like to see her?" First Aid asked. Frenzy's optic visor flashed. _See her? She? My she?_ He nodded mutely. "Her berth is plugged into the wall, so you'll have to go over to her. Do you think you can manage? With my help?" Frenzy only nodded again, and allowed First Aid to help him into a sitting position. The room spun around him.

Finally, when his equilibrium sensors had adjusted, First Aid took both of Frenzy's hands and helped him to stand, leaning the Cassetticon against the berth. He removed the energon line and some of the monitoring equipment from the Mini-Cassette who stood rigidly, too consumed by the berth across the room to be conscious of the aches, and pangs, and dizziness he felt. Holding onto First Aid's arm for support, Frenzy allowed himself to be led slowly across the room.

A trembling hand reached for the edge of the little berth, and Frenzy peered over the side. He didn't know what he'd been expecting, but as he stared down into the berth he knew it wasn't this.

_Primus, it's so tiny,_ was his first thought as he stared at the grey and red sparkling. Some of the wires and tubes leading from the grey chest plate or red feet were thicker than the sparkling's curled black fingers. He started to count the fingers, his overworked processor grasping for something to quantify. But the number was instantly forgotten when it moved. Just a twitch of the arm, bringing the whole thing to life.

Frenzy felt his spark pulse as the yellow optic visor, shorter than his hand, lit up and the head lolled over to look up at him. Suddenly nine weeks of purging and aches, six weeks of anxiety, four weeks of kicks and wiggles had a face. He could see it, her. She was right there. Those were the tiny feet that had kicked against his cosmotron, those were the tiny hands that had punched him in the laser core.

"It's…she's okay?" Frenzy asked, without taking his optics off her.

"She's _stable_." First Aid replied. "She's still pretty fragile, and we're watching her very closely."

"What's all the…the wires and stuff for." Frenzy frowned, nervous.

"One is an energon line, one is hooked into her electrical system, one is assisting her engine, some of them are sensors." First Aid put his hand on Frenzy's shoulder. "Really, she shouldn't have been delivered for another two or three weeks. So she's in for a long haul here," he added gently, "but she seems remarkably resilient so far. A strong little spark. And she's stable." Frenzy could only nod watching the monitors he didn't understand, the wires and tubes; and in the middle of it all, there she was.

"You can touch her if you'd like." First Aid offered gently. "You can't hold her yet, but go ahead and talk to her Frenzy. Let her know you're here."

Frenzy hesitantly reached out and ran one shaking finger over the back of a tiny black palm. The sparkling twitched her arm, all her narrow, delicate fingers splaying out. She let out a faint noise, a mix between a squeak and a gasp.

"Hi." Frenzy breathed. The plating felt strange under his finger, almost waxy. Frenzy pulled his finger back and looked up at First Aid. "It's...she's...why..." he trailed off and looked back down at the sparkling, leaning heavily on the sparkling berth and First Aid's arm. He was oddly self-conscious, guiltily shying away from all the strong feelings the little sparkling stirred up in him.

But his optics kept drinking every inch of her in. He reached out toward her hand again, but stopped, hovering close to the delicate black fingers.

"Does she have a name?"

Frenzy shook his head, and drew his hand back. "Slag. A—a name? She?"

First Aid gripped his shoulder and chuckled, "Slag, oddly enough, is taken. And though 'She' is very descriptive, and not likely to get her confused with anyone else around here, maybe something a little more...characteristic?"

After a long pause, Frenzy shrugged helplessly, watching dazed as the tiny femme slipped back into recharge. The machines and monitors around her were humming, beeping, and clicking softly.

"Well that's okay," First Aid patted Frenzy on the back. "You don't have to think of one this astrosecond."

Frenzy was practically draped over the edge of the sparkberth, leaning on it completely, and resting his chin on the rim, exhausted, but still watching. It was only when First Aid put a firm hand on the Mini-Cassette's shoulder and gently pulled him away that Frenzy reluctantly tore his optics from the sparkling, and in spite of the numb exhaustion that ached through his every diode and servo, he still took his sweet time inching further and further away. When he was back on his berth his optics found the support berth from across the room.

"A name...what...slag...." Frenzy muttered to himself while First Aid hooked the monitors and energon lines back up to his patient. "She? Slag...."

Frenzy was still watching the sparkberth when recharge claimed him, his visor flickering off facing the tiny berth across the room.

First Aid gave Frenzy one more careful look over, and the still recharging Ironhide a glance, before moving to his other sleeping patient. He checked every monitor and readout on and around the support berth, entering the readings into his datapad. After a moment of cross-referencing and considering, he reached forward and turned the external solenoid adapter down. Though it would weaken the voltage going through the sparkling's circuits, the diodes in her rectifiers were beginning to heat up, which could wreak havok on her already unstable coolant pump and radiator, especially since her thermostatic clutch was refusing to engage. He would just have to keep a very close watch on the ammeter to make sure her amperage didn't drop too much.

He checked her engine temperature again, and dropped the temperature in the secondary radiator he had hooked up down a few degrees, at the same time he adjusted the temperature of the berth itself up slightly. Finally, First Aid sat down at a chair he had set up next to the support berth and waited for the monitors to change. He didn't bother to turn as the Med Bay doors whooshed open.

"You haven't gotten any recharge yet?" Ratchet asked, walking over to the Autobot doctor.

First Aid shook his head. "The first few days are going to be very crucial," he murmured, "We need to keep her systems operating at optimum..."

"You need to get some recharge. You've been up for nearly two days!" Ratchet chided, "You won't help anyone if your processor starts glitching."

Shaking his head mildly, First Aid changed the subject. "Frenzy was up a moment ago."

Ratchet turned to look at the recharging Mini-Cassette. "You're kidding, after the overhauling we had to give his internals I thought it would be at least another five or six hours before his systems would come back online."

First Aid shrugged, "I was surprised too. I kept his sensor net mostly deadened and he was only up for a few minutes, but he seemed lucid."

"Did you ask him what happened?" Ratchet walked over to hover above the little femme. He gave the monitors an appraising look.

"He seemed rather...preoccupied with other things." First Aid answered warmly, a smile hidden in his voice.

Smiling outwardly Ratchet reached down and rearranged some of the wires around the sparkling's feet. "Did he get a chance to see her? Do we have a name yet?" The second question was almost directed to the sparkling.

"Yes, he saw her. And no, he hasn't named her yet." First Aid tweaked the secondary radiator again, turning the temperature back up very slightly. "I don't think he'd even thought about names before I'd asked him."

Ratchet chuckled, all the while watching First Aid's head droop farther and farther in exhaustion. The Autobot medic sighed, still smiling, and put a hand on First Aid's shoulder. "You did good, Aid. You really did. Hoist, Wheeljack, and the rest... Well, we're frankly all amazed that you managed to pull them both through this."

First Aid turned. "They're--"

"I know, I know," Ratchet interrupted, "They're not off the rough road yet. What I was trying to say is: we're all very proud of you. Now get some recharge before I have to put you in stasis myself."

"But..."

"No buts! I've done my research, I can handle the watch for a few hours. And I promise, I'll call you the astrosecond anything even looks like it might swerve from the straight and narrow." The Protectobot still hesitated, so Ratchet added, "Cross my spark and hope to hug a Korlonium crystal, I'll call. Now rest."

Sighing in resignation, First Aid stood and took one last careful inspection of all the monitors on his patients. He handed Ratchet his datapad, and shuffled out of the Med Bay. Ratchet took the seat next to the sparkberth; leaning forward to, again, study the tiny, recharging, femme sparkling.

"I know you're awake, by the way." Ratchet called over his shoulder. The Autobot medic heard an amused grunt. Then the sound of heavy footsteps and Ironhide walked over to stand beside the berth as well. Both mechs watched Frenzy's sparkling for a while.

"She's really something, isn't she?" Ironhide said, quiet. "Look at her. I could fit six of her in one hand, seven if I packed 'em tight."

"She should have been in development for another two weeks," Ratchet sighed, reaching down to delicately brush the crest of her helm with a finger wider than her leg.

"Well she's here. First Aid said himself that she's stable."

Ratchet shook his head slowly, in lingering amazement. "That's just the thing, Ironhide. You don't know, but that...it was nothing like I'd done, or even seen, before. Apparently my every instinct was wrong, deadly wrong, because everything I would have done in a situation like that, First Aid did the opposite. He knew what to do, and when to do it, but even _he_ thought for a while there we might lose them both." He turned to look from the unconscious Frenzy to Ironhide, then back to the sparkling. "The kid came close enough, and this little one here? By rights, by my reckoning, she shouldn't be here at all."

Ironhide nodded, letting the realization of how close they'd really come sink in deeply. He gestured over to Frenzy, "He, I mean, he's gonna be alright? Right?"

"He should pull through okay. He's not in any immediate danger; he just got banged up real good. Systems took quite a shock too. We had to rearrange his internals completely, jerry-rig some replacement components." Ratchet frowned, "We might be able to put his flight systems back in later; but I don't think he's ever going to be able to transform again. But all he's gotta do now is heal."

The red mech gestured to the sparkling. "And her?"

"Really, too early to tell. There's too many variables. We keep her stable, hope her systems get stronger, and she should be okay. If something goes wrong, she could be gone before we had time to do anything."

Giving the sparkling a tender, worried smile, Ironhide crossed his arms. "You don't let anything go wrong, hear?" He commanded gruffly, to both the femme and the medic. "I gotta go report to Prime."

Ratchet called after the old red mech as he reached to door. "Tell Optimus that if it wasn't for First Aid we would have lost them. You tell him that."

Ironhide nodded, glanced one more time over at Frenzy, and left the Med Bay.


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: Sorry again about the long delay between posts. I don't know exactly why the story is coming slower than it did at the beginning, but the more I care about it, the slower it goes to write it. (But this is the LONGEST chapter so far!) As always, comments are the energon goodies that feed this ravening sharkticon. Even negative crit is delicious to my soul. So start formulating your detailed criticisms now! I apologize if ff(dot)net has been stealing my page breaks, cuz they didn't use to do that!

XXXXXXX

Frenzy frowned across the room. Perceptor and First Aid were hovering above the sparkling support berth; busily adjusting, and talking to each other in voices both methodical and infuriatingly quiet. An alarm had gone off on the berth. Five thousand and seventy eight point two astroseconds ago. It had instantly pulled Frenzy out of the dazed half-recharge he'd spent the last several hours drifting in.

He'd watched silently as the entire medical team trickled in and out. First, Ratchet had come in to assist First Aid, then Hoist and Wheeljack had arrived for instructions, and now that stupid Autobot Scientist was murmuring something unintelligible over the little berth that Frenzy couldn't see into. Frenzy's frown deepened when First Aid reached into a wall compartment for another unidentifiable machine, and strung yet another tube into the sparkberth.

"You want me to ask what's goin' on?" Ironhide mumbled from where he stood stiffly near his seat, arms crossed and staring through the television. He leaned back awkwardly against the wall. Frenzy shook his head as he twiddled with the remote, flipping up and down through channels that he'd already flipped through half a minute before.

"You sure?"

Frenzy glanced up at the big red mech. He shook his head again, then turned to the TV where he'd found boxing. For a moment he acted like he was trying to get into the match, but before long he was surfing through the same channels again, frowning over at the sparkling berth and doctors every few seconds. Ironhide decided to leave him alone.

At last, First Aid seemed satisfied enough with the sparkling's condition to allow himself to notice that his other patient was awake and anxious. The Autobot doctor walked over, scanner in hand.

"I didn't know you were online, Frenzy, I'm sorry. We had a slight electrical malfunction," he explained, "Electropulse was low, but we hooked up some external Direct Current to her laser core. She's stable again. She's fine."

"'Kay." Frenzy clipped, picking at the remote again.

First Aid began scanning Frenzy from head to toe. "I turned your sensor net up a little bit. Does it feel alright or do you need me to turn it back down again?"

"'S fine."

"You're sure?"

"I'll deal with it." There was a pause while Frenzy sat up straighter and changed the channel back to boxing.

"Well, you're recovering faster than I'd expected," First Aid continued, "But we'll still be keeping you here for another week or so to let us adjust your systems slowly as you get stronger." Another pause. "Do you have any questions?"

Frenzy seemed unsure, and scratched at his helm as if trying to scratch away some confusion or doubt. But instead of answering he only shrugged.

First Aid looked over to Ironhide who nodded him on. They'd agreed earlier that they needed to have this conversation as soon as possible. "Well. _We_ have some questions we need to ask, Frenzy," the Autobot doctor started again, "If you're feeling up to it?"

Frenzy flicked off the TV. "Sure, why not," he sighed in resignation, "Bring on the slaggin' inquisition."

"This isn't an inquisition," Ironhide corrected, "This is us figuring out where things stand."

"Whatever."

"Frenzy, we just want to know what happened." First Aid explained.

Frenzy eyed the sparkling berth, and curled his arms around his chest. "You guys gonna lock me up again?"

"Depends." Ironhide answered. "Do we _need_ to lock you up again?"

The Mini-Cassette frowned and leaned back limply on the berth, his fingers tracing the new scars crisscrossing his chestplates. Finally he laughed, but bitterly. "If you're asking if I'm gonna try and smash my way out again..." his frown faded into something sadder, "Well there's not much point."

"Why not?" First Aid asked.

"You think I smashed _myself_ into a slaggin' tree?"

"Who did?" Ironhide rumbled angrily.

Frenzy snorted; then rubbed his hand across his optic band. "Megatron."

Ironhide gestured to the fresh weld where the dented gash in Frenzy's chest had been. "He did _that_ when he found out the chip'd been fried?"

"The chip's busted?" Frenzy asked, surprised. When First Aid nodded, he started laughing humorlessly.

"He didn't know the chip was useless?" First Aid asked. Frenzy shook his head. "Then why did he-?"

"I told him no," Frenzy cut in, "I finally told him no." There was a defiant shadow of a smile on Frenzy's face.

"Good." Ironhide grunted, "An' what made you finally do that?"

"Look I- Slag." Frenzy's smile had disappeared. "I thought that I get them that chip that maybe I'd earn myself enough... oh, hell I don't know." Frenzy fumbled with the remote, hunching in like he was embarrassed. "It seemed like such a little thing to ask for. Ya know? But the big dumb slagger wouldn't even think about it. He..." Frenzy glanced over at the sparkling berth again, frowning angrily, "He was gonna make me get rid of it—her. And I finally told him no. Told him that I wasn't handing over that damn chip either."

Ironhide nodded. "Who else was there?" He asked.

"Starscream. An' Soundwave... an' Rumble." Each name was offered quieter and more reluctantly than the last. The remote hung limply in Frenzy's hands and he stared at it blankly.

"Did they leave you behind on purpose?" First Aid put a hand on Frenzy's shoulder but the Mini-Cassette shrugged it off.

"Yeah. They did. Cuz Megatron tol' em too. And they took the chip."

After pulling back his rejected hand First Aid leaned in further. "And did Megatron know that-?"

"Yeah. He knew. Didn't seem too happy 'bout it either." A gesture to his pieced together chestplate. "Obv'usly."

"Sick fragger." Ironhide growled to himself, hands slowly curling into fists.

Frenzy's bitter laugh echoed through the Med Bay again. "I shoulda known better." The Cassetticon said. "It was a retarded thing to ask for. Made me look like a slagheaded idiot." Frenzy grimaced at his own words and glared at the two Autobots, daring them to make some kind of wisecrack. But both older mechs were frowning thoughtfully instead.

"Asking for your own child is not a 'retarded' request Frenzy." First Aid declared. "It is a completely reasonable and just request for a parent to make."

"Unlucky for you, you didn't go askin' the most reasonable or just folks." Ironhide added grimly.

"Well then it was a retarded thing to ask Megatron. Still was stupid."

"_Runnin' away_ was stupid," the security 'bot corrected, "And it cost you. A lot. Nearly cost you both everything. Ya know?"

"Dammit. I know!" Frenzy snapped. "Don't ya see I know? Look at-" He gestured to the sparkberth, his pitch increasing. "I mean—Gah! Slaggit! I know! Okay?" Frenzy hung his head, shamefaced in the silence of the two Autobots. When he finally spoke again his voice was much quieter, pained. "Look, they...they knew what they were doin' when they left me behind like that. Okay? They knew that I...that we would—." He waved his hand dismissively, sighing. "I'd told 'em off. I'd told the Boss no. And there's no going back from that. At least not for strut lickin', sawed-off runts, like me. Megatron's through with me," Frenzy curled tighter, feeling the ache of each weld, each rerouted, rebuilt part burning as he moved; as he realized the crushing weight of what he was saying for the first time. "Megatron's through with me, so the rest of 'em are too."

A confessional silence followed, both Ironhide and First Aid mute witnesses, taking in what Frenzy had said. At last Frenzy raised his head a little, just enough that he could look over at the sparkberth. "I really fucked up," he admitted. Then his voice dropped, "Are you going to take her away? From me?"

"It's not our decision to make." First Aid answered. "It's Prime's. But I know it's not a choice that he would make lightly." The Protectobot's posture became stern. "Frenzy, you lied to us. You abused our trust. You attacked us, stole from us, and destroyed valuable property. But what concerns me most is how you put your own sparkling in danger. Your reckless actions have put her at serious risk, and we could still lose her. Easily. Do you understand? You've put her in a very vulnerable position."

Ironhide could tell that Frenzy was chafing under the reprimand, and was more than a little surprised that the Mini-Cassette was taking the lecture silently. But the glint of fear in Frenzy's visor at First Aid's words explained all.

"What do you want me to do?" Frenzy asked flatly, choking down his annoyance at the Autobot's admonishment.

"You can start by telling us the truth," Ironhide answered. "About everythin' from the top. Everything you've hid, every little secret meetin'."He sat down on the edge of the berth. "I talked to Prime earlier, an' he'll be in sometime today." Ironhide met Frenzy's optics with a solemn, level stare. "If you want her Frenzy, and you really mean it, then you tell Prime _everythin'_. Every lie, every move, every thought. An' then you tell him exactly what you want as honest as you can. Don't clam up, don't hold back, and don't play games kid. Not if you're serious about this."

"Anything else?"

"Yeah kid," Ironhide's mouth quirked into a tiny smile, "Ya gotta think of a name."

Frenzy shook his head helplessly and shrugged. "How in the Pit am I supposed to do that?"

XXXXXXX

_Explosions. High Grade. Gore. . Swearing. Earthquakes._

Frenzy leaned his chin against the edge of the sparkberth and stared down at the fragile femme sparkling. He twisted around in the chair that had been pulled up next to the support berth. The Med Bay doors were closed and motionless. First Aid was working at a terminal across the room. Ironhide had left to talk to Optimus Prime. Frenzy turned back to the tiny sparkling.

_Viscera. Screaming. Battle. Madness. Pounding. _

_Think of things you really like. Think of things around you_. That's what Ironhide and First Aid had said.

_Sleeping. Napping. Eating. Energy. Guns. Rockets. Bombs._

The sparkling's hand twitched a little bit. She was recharging.

_Land mines. Frag mines. Shrapnel._ Frenzy sighed. _That one's taken_. Without thinking he tapped against the side of the berth, and nearly fell out of his chair when the sparkling woke up with a high-pitched mewling cry. Her face squintched up, and her weak cries continued, arms and legs twitching and flopping around. Frenzy backed away when First Aid approached with his scanner already out.

_Think of what she's like. What she looks like. What she reminds you of_. First Aid had suggested. First Aid reached down into the support berth and gingerly picked up the whining sparkling, cupping her in one palm and holding her steady and secure with the other. Deftly maneuvering his arms around and through the wires and tubes the doctor cupped her close to his chest, talking to her in a soothing low voice. She continued her weak crying.

_Girly. Little. Weak. Tiny. Needy. Fragile. Sick. Pathetic._

"She's alright." First Aid reassured Frenzy. "Just feeling a little fussy and uncomfortable." He gently rocked the hand holding her close to the warm plating on his chest as her cries died down. "It's really a good sign," he continued, as he carefully sat down in the chair on the other side of the berth, his optic band darting from the monitor to the sparkling and back again. Frenzy watched what parts of her he could peeking out from between and above First Aid's fingers and palms and the wires and tubes.

_Red shoulders. Black helm. Black feet. Black hands. Red hips. Black arms._ Frenzy frowned. _Grey legs. Grey waist. Grey Elbows, Grey Chestplate. Red Sides._

_Think of what she reminds you of. _Frenzy suppressed a shudder and put his hand over the scars on his chest. Trying to drag his processor away from shadows hovering threateningly over them both. _What she reminds you of... Who..._

The sparkling let out another faint squeal and Frenzy reassessed the tiny robot cradled in an Autobot's hand. The churning in his tanks subsided.

_Think of what you love. _Drumming his fingers on his leg thoughtfully, Frenzy's frown softened but didn't go away. Love was a dirty word, one he felt more instantaneous shame and fear using than any of the hundreds of deliciously foul words he gleefully peppered his speech with. Overt affection, compassion, sympathy: these were things that Frenzy knew he would get punished for. Things any self respecting Decepticon would rather rip his own vocalizer out than admit to.

In his entire life, Frenzy could only think of one time he'd used the word seriously. And he'd been alone and on the razor's edge of death. Frenzy's frown faded away like the sparkling's tired cries. First Aid carefully placed the sparkling back into the support berth. Her arms curled close to her chest as she settled in to recharge. Frenzy leaned his chin against the edge of the berth again. He couldn't very well name the sparkling after herself.

_What you love. What you like._

_Soundwave. Laserbeak. Ravage. Ratbat. Buzzsaw. Rumble. _Frenzy sighed, and shook his head, refocusing on the femme recharging in the berth._ Rumble. Tumble. Collapsing. Cracking. Smacking. Slamming. Pounding. Smashing. Bashing. Crashing. _

Frenzy's hand wandered into the berth, playing with the padded surface, brushing back and forth right underneath the tiny, curled, fingers. He could feel himself getting tired again. _Think of things you really like, things around you_, _what she's like, looks like, reminds you of_, _think of what you love. Reminds you of._

_Smashing. Bashing. Pounding. Slamming. Crashing._

Crashing on Earth. Smashing into a lighthouse. Bashing into a cell's wall. Pounding his fist on Ironhide's knee. Slamming into Red Alert's reset relay. Crashing into a tree.

Eventually, First Aid nudged Frenzy back to his berth. "You look tired. You want to be rested up for when Optimus Prime comes in later today. Don't you?" The Protectobot said as he led Frenzy back across the room.

"'Aid?" Frenzy could already feel his still-recovering body begin to wind down as soon as it hit the berth.

"Yes?" First Aid ran a scanner over Frenzy's chest.

"What would you name her?"

First Aid paused to consider for a moment before hooking up one last energon line. "Whatever fits Frenzy." He patted the Mini-Cassette on the shoulder. "Whatever fits."

XXXXX

Optimus Prime paused a moment outside the doors to the Med Bay, allowing his conversations with Ironhide to replay in his processor. He was somewhat eager, somewhat apprehensive, but mostly Optimus was relieved and concerned. Relieved that both Frenzy and his sparkling were alive and back under his care; and concerned with the sparkling's reportedly fragile state, and the future of both creator and creation which he soon had to pass verdict on.

Hey keyed into the Med Bay, which was locked. To his right Frenzy was lying on his berth, surfing through channels on a television he wasn't watching while he stared at the ceiling. To his left Optimus could hear the humming and clicking of the support berth. As soon as the Autobot Leader entered, Frenzy turned the TV off. First Aid nodded to Prime from the sparkling's berth, and after glancing carefully at the monitors and machines around the sparkling, left the Med Bay.

Prime walked over to Frenzy's berth first. There was a long pause while Optimus took in Frenzy's posture, his demeanor, and the jagged scars across his chestplates. A sudden pang of guilt washed over the Autobot Leader, but he did his best to quash it. He would probably feel obligated to give it full rein later, but for now...

"Frenzy." Optimus greeted, somewhat stiffly. "Ironhide tells me that you gave the whole medical team quite a scare a couple days ago."

""s been a couple days? Slag." Frenzy scratched at the itchy new welds. Another long pause while Prime mulled over his thoughts.

"I-I also wanted to offer my... congratulations."Prime finally continued, unsure if what he was saying was appropriate or appreciated. "I was wondering if I might see your sparkling?"

Frenzy gestured over to the sparkberth. "Uh, sure. Be my guest, I guess."

Optimus walked over to the tiny berth, and crouched slightly to get a close look at the tiny femme. His optics crinkled kindly, as he took in the precious new life. _Precious and fragile, and so frighteningly tiny, _Optimus pondered, feeling a fresh wave of admiration. _Only First Aid could have saved her,_ he realized. "She's beautiful Frenzy." Optimus commented.

" Thanks," Frenzy mumbled, suddenly shy.

"May I?" The huge Autobot reached tentatively down toward the berth.

"Don't pick her up!" Frenzy sat bolt upright. "I mean, uhhh...she's too little. First Aid said. But you can touch her I guess. A little."

Optimus reached down and gently brushed her helm with a finger longer than her entire body. Her golden optic visor flickered to life. "Does she have a name?"

"Crasher," Frenzy blurted. "Her name's Crasher."

"Hello Crasher," Optimus greeted the sparkling, "I'm Optimus Prime. You are very welcome here."

There as a tender irony to this meeting that was not lost on the Autobot Leader. A sweet improbability, that he could only call the most unlikely miracle. There was no reason that this little femme should have escaped destruction. That this innocent life, that Megatron himself unwittingly sparked, should have slipped through the prison of war and madness the Decepticons had built around themselves and found its way here; to be protected, defended, and cared for by Megatron's sworn enemies.

Primus was giving Prime something infinitely precious to him. Something the Autobot Leader had always deeply desired: a drop of redemption. A chance to show a measure of forgiveness and grace somehow, in some way, to those who would never agree to accept it; to the Decepticons, and even to Megatron himself. The fact that Prime had come so close to letting this chance slip away was humbling. Was almost painful. _Primus_, Optimus thought, _Thank you_. _For second chances._ He brushed Crasher's helm again, and she turned her head into his touch, staring at the huge blue digit with the hazy, unfocused light of a newborn sparkling. _I promise, I'll do everything in my power to protect this new life you've entrusted to my care._ He felt an unsettled tugging in his spark at the thought, and he turned.

Frenzy was watching him interact with the fragile sparkling. On the Cassetticon's faceplates echoed a dozen conflicted emotions, most morphing into some kind of fear. The rejected Decepticon drummed his fingers nervously on his knees, staring at the huge hand hovering—shadowing- the tiny femme. They were certainly not equally innocent, the parent and the child, but they _were_ equally precious, and Optimus realized watching them that one could not have escaped without the other. Prime looked from Frenzy to his sparkling, and bowed his head. _Both of them_, he amended, _I promise, I'll watch over both of them. _

Straightening up, Optimus walked over to the young mech, who nearly cringed at the Autobot Leader's approach.

"Frenzy," Optimus began, "Will you talk with me?"

The question shocked Frenzy. The Autobot Leader hadn't asked if Frenzy _wanted_ to talk to him, but he also wasn't making the conversation mandatory. Separated from emotion and coercion, everything was boiled down to a simple yes or no. Do it, or don't.

Though he couldn't look Optimus in the optic, Frenzy nodded. "Yeah, I'll talk."

"And will you tell me everything truthfully? Anything I ask?"

Frenzy winced, but Ironhide's words echoed in his processor. "Yeah, I mean yes," he answered.

Optimus Prime sat down in the chair next to the berth. "I won't ask you too many questions. But what I ask will be direct Frenzy. And I expect you to answer directly." There was no accusation, no aggression in Prime's words. Instead there was only a compassionate solemnity. "There is no need to hide anything. I am not here to judge how best to punish you for what you've done in the past, but how best to move forward; and my judgments are not to hurt you, but to help you. Do you understand?"

"Not really." Frenzy's face quirked, "You said to be honest right?"

Optimus chuckled quietly. "Be honest, Frenzy, yes. Any lie would be a dangerous thing at this point." His voice grew more serious. "That is your only warning."

"Okay. _That_ I understood," Frenzy said nervously.

Prime nodded. "When we first captured you, was the lighthouse attack and your capture in any way a trick or a ruse to get you into Autobot Headquarters?"

Frenzy shook his head. "No. No what I told Aid about the lighthouse stuff was the truth. I ran off cuz I was mad. I didn't _want_ to get captured. And nobody told me to."

"When were you first contacted by the Decepticons while here at base?"

"Uhh...I—I think it was... it was after she started kicking me. Before that I didn't know if they knew where I was at or cared or anything. First I saw Laserbeak watchin' me from the grate, but Rumble didn' come in until like...a week? Two weeks? After that."

"How many other Decepticons knew you were here? And how many knew your condition?"

Frenzy shrugged helplessly. "Soundwave, and prob'ly all the other little guys knew, and Megatron obv'sly. Screamer came to pick me up with the chip, an he seemed kinda surprised when he learned 'bout, ya know," Frenzy gestured to the sparkberth, "I don' know if anyone else knew bout me bein' captured. But if Screamer didn't know 'bout me bein' sparked up than slaggin' no one knew."

"Have you been contacted by any Decepticons since we brought you back?"

"No."

"Do you have any means of contacting the Decepticons?"

"No. I mean, I've got the general comn frequencies and stuff, but I don't have my own comn anymore. So no."

Prime leaned forward, catching Frenzy's optic visor. Frenzy wanted to look away from the stare made all the more piercing by the gentleness behind it, but he found he couldn't.

"Frenzy. You said when you spoke with First Aid that you knew the Decepticons would terminate your sparkling. And then you said you wanted her. When you said it, was it the truth?"

"I—I wasn't lying then. Rumble told me that nobody gets to keep them, and—and by then I did. I didn't want it to be terminated."

"Then why did you go back?" Prime asked, their optics still locked. Frenzy's face became pained.

"There was—I mean Rumble had said that if I got that chip thing. That...that Megatron and everyone would be—and I thought that—that then I could ask. I thought that I could ask and they would let me have it." Frenzy finally couldn't take Prime's gaze any longer, and he dropped his head to look down at his hands. He traced the creases of the joints on one hand with the other, waiting for the next question.

"Did you _know_ they would?"

Frenzy shook his head.

"Did you really think that you would be able to care for your sparkling with the Decepticons as well as you would be able to here?"

"No." Frenzy mumbled, and hung his head lower in shame. "But I didn't really think about it."

"Look at me Frenzy." Optimus' voice was firm. Frenzy looked up. "Do you love Crasher? Do you love your sparkling?"

Frenzy's face twisted. Any admission would have come easier than _this_, but those kindly blue optics held the Mini-Cassette's gaze fast again, and wrung out the confession. "Yes," he finally replied.

"Do you want to be the one to parent her?"

"I—I don't...I don't know _how_." Frenzy's voice was shaking. He tore his optics from Prime's to look at the sparkling berth. "I don't know how," he repeated.

"Answer honestly, Frenzy. And know that you will not be punished for your answer, no matter what it is. Should we take Crasher from you to be parented by someone else?"

"No."Frenzy answered immediately, but then sank in on himself. "But—I...Slag," he whispered, looking over at the berth, "But maybe it...it would be...be better for her, if you did." He rested his head in his hands miserably. "I slaggin' don't know _how_."

"That is a very selfless thing for you to admit and accept Frenzy," Prime said. Frenzy felt a large finger reach under his chin, once again lifting his face into Optimus Prime's gaze. "And spoken like a true parent." He put one huge hand on Frenzy's back, almost covering it. "We don't want to take Crasher from you. What we want is for _you_ to be a good parent to her. And we will teach you if you will learn. Will you learn?"

There it was again. That do or don't. But this time Frenzy couldn't answer as directly as before, because that would be lying. Frenzy had no idea if he was even capable of learning whatever he would have to know to be a 'good' parent. All he could say was, "I want to...I'll try."

Optimus patted him on the back. "That's fine." But then he stood and looked at the Mini-Cassette sternly. "I have one last question. And again, I want your honest answer. You will not be punished for answering truthfully. If the Decepticons contacted you, and told you that both you and Crasher were welcome back with them, would you go?"

There was a long pause, where Frenzy looked from Crasher to Optimus Prime and back again. Finally he looked down at his hands, then the scars, for a long time. His head came back up, and he looked Prime right in the optics. "The chances of that are 'bout as good as the chances of a scraplet survivin' a carwash, but if we both could go back and she'd be safe then...then yeah...yeah, I would go back." His face twisted and he watched his hands again. "I miss...I miss Soundwave. I miss Rumble," he tried to explain, but finally sighed. "But they're _not_ coming, and I'm not going back." He glanced up, trying to gauge Prime's reaction, "You told me to be honest."

Prime nodded. "I did. And I meant it. You won't be punished for speaking your spark. I appreciate your honesty in this. I'll think on what we've said, and I'll let you know what I've decided regarding your probation soon. And there will be a probation period, Frenzy. You need to earn our trust again. And we will be making sure you know how to care for Crasher before we will be leaving her in your care. As it is, you are confined to Med Bay, under supervision at all times, but you may receive visitors if you wish." Prime's optics grew warm again. "I know that there are many Autobots who are jumping all over themselves to meet your new arrival. Bumblebee being at the forefront."

Frenzy snorted and shook his head. "That's slaggin' _great_." he muttered sarcastically, with a tiny smile.

Optimus walked over to the sparkberth one more time. The little femme was still awake, blearily looking around herself. "One last thing Frenzy," Prime began again, his voice solemn but non-threatening, "I am a firm believer in second chances, but when there is another life on the line, especially one so fragile and dependent, then there is a limit to my patience. You will not hurt Crasher again. And if you do we will not hesitate, not even for an instant, to take her from you permanently. I am not saying this to intimidate you. It is just a fact. She's under our care now, and one way or another we will make sure she is safe as possible. You are under our care as well, but unlike your daughter you are old enough to make that choice consciously. Do you understand?"

Frenzy could only nod, and watch as the Autobot Leader left the Med Bay.

XXXXX

Megatron sat alone in his quarters of Decepticon Headquarters, brooding. It was really not something he did very often. Usually every time the urge hit him he would distract himself with something else: a plan, a mock battle, or one of his soldiers. But this time…

He felt he owed it in a way. Some shred of decency buried deep down commanded him to at least consider this new revelation for a moment before he made the predetermined decision. After all, it's not every cycle that you're told you have a daughter.

He really had not expected that the Autobots would come back for Frenzy. But when he found out, he had not been surprised. What had surprised him was Frenzy's refusal to hand over the chip in the first place. _Insubordinate little nuisance!_ Megatron thought, grinding his gears in frustration. _Why didn't I kill you outright, and save myself all this difficulty? And why couldn't you just die?_ It was only Soundwave's stiff strength at the command to leave his offspring behind. The silent way he brought up the rear. The way he stared through Megatron darkly, that finally broke the Decepticon Leader's steely resolve. Laserbeak was sent back to see if Frenzy had changed his mind. The darkest part of Megatron's spark hoped fervently that the little Mini-Cassette had already expired.

When Laserbeak didn't return for several hours Megatron began to wonder.

Reviewing Laserbeak's recording again the tall grey mech rubbed at the back of his hand. He could swear that he still felt the unnatural warmth of Frenzy's chestplates right where he'd struck him. He glared at the filmy shot of a cluster of those infernal Autobot medics working over Frenzy. He glare turned to a frown when he saw the smallest of the doctors pull away carrying something to another table. The shot zoomed in, and he caught the barest glimpse of an incredibly small grey hand before the doctor moved in to work, obscuring his view again.

A few of the other doctors moved to the second table, tense anxiety radiating off each of them. Megatron crossed his arms over his chest and watched the scene impassively. Finally, one at a time, they pulled away. The Decepticon didn't hide his disappointment at the doctors' obvious, though guarded, relief. When the last Autobot moved the shot zoomed in again, and Megatron stared at the tiny sparkling on the table.

It had quite a bit of grey on it, something that angered Megatron in a way. The miniature thing, hardly bigger than a human's newling spawn by the looks of it, twitched instinctively, curling it's little silvery hands near its head defensively.

For a moment Megatron was without thoughts. Though he had sparked several of his soldiers over the eons, he had never allowed any of the sparklings to develop. This was, in truth, his first child born. It was intricately manufactured, perfectly constructed, alive, and unmistakably female in design.

He thought, rather benevolently in his opinion, that if he hadn't sired it he might have let her live.

He shook his head in disgust as he stared at the fragile thing. To have his essence perverted in such a way. Mixed with far inferior stock, degraded. It was twisted: to have a part of yourself residing in such a insignificant vessel. To have a constant reminder of your own weakness, the broken bastardization of a handful of moments too inconsequential to adequately remember, claiming you as sire.

It was shameful. He could not allow any part of himself, no matter how far removed, to be so weak. So tiny. So needy.

He tapped at the viewscreen absently, where the picture of the little femme sparkling still glimmered.

"Don't worry, my dear." Megatron murmured almost tenderly. "It will all be over soon."

XXXX

A/N: Now you all know why Frenzy's kid had to be a girl! It wasn't just to be all woobly and girly: I had specific, TF-referencing, reasons! Double-plus bonus points to anyone who knows the reference I'm referring to!

I'll be going to Europe on the 15th and won't be back until the 24th. I want to get one more update up before then. But we'll see.

Again! Thanks for reading!


	25. Chapter 25

A/N: Here's a little something for all you out there still reading after my numerous lapses. Suffice to say that getting back to writing after getting back from Europe wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. I've been working through some pretty serious writer's block with my wonderful betas and sounding boards. I know that many of you would expect the story to wind down around now, but there is still a lot of important story to be told, and I wanna make sure I tell it right. Remember babies are born, but parents are made. And making a parent from an emotionally stunted, psychologically scarred, sawed-off Decepticon drop-out is gonna take more time than, say, making a Headmaster outta Arcee.

So here's a shorter chapter, to get us back up to speed and set up for the rest of the story.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Ironhide glanced at the glittery, pink high-grade at the bottom of his cube before tossing back another long swig. A sweep around the dim, high-ceilinged room revealed more than the usual crowd, the place was getting near packed. Rather than the usual open, party atmosphere, the assembled Autobots were bunched in small groups, talking animatedly, but not too loud. Despite this, there was an air of smug celebration around most there.

Ironhide turned back to his cube and sidled up closer to the long, high table serving as bar. He was deep in thought when he sensed another body take a spot close to him.

"Just half a cube, buddy." Blaster told the blue mech manning the pump. The blocky bartender nodded and turned to the energon station. The communications 'Bot rested his elbow on the bar so he was facing the old red Autobot Security Officer. "How's it hanging Ironhide?" Blaster greeted, smiling in his cocksure way that could be suave or plain annoying depending on the situation. Ironhide couldn't decide which case it was this time.

" 'S been worse." Ironhide peeled himself away from the table to take in the room better. He drank down half of what he had left in his cube, feeling the potent energon flash through his systems, dulling his sensors and easing away some of the tight knot of anxiety that had settled core-deep.

Blaster nodded a thanks to the blue mech as he took his cube. "So this is the happenin' place to be?" He gestured with his cube to the groups of Autobots mingling in the corners of the room.

"Seems that way." Ironhide agreed, then he tossed back the last of his high-grade and motioned to the barkeep for another.

"Gossip 's really going around out there now." Blaster took a drink, his optics darting from one group of Autobots to another. "Been a long time since they've had this much to talk about."

Turning back to the table and his fresh cube, Ironhide waved off the crowd. "Awww... Next week it'll be somethin' new. Always is."

"Don't know 'bout that Ironhide." Blaster turned his back to the crowd too. "In a couple months, maybe; but they're not gonna wear out this tread in a hurry. Not with a story like this."

Ironhide grumbled inaudibly into his high-grade, glaring at the iridescent liquid thoughtfully.

They both sat for a moment, staring into their drinks. Finally Blaster leaned in. "Hey, uh, Ironhide. Ya know, no one has really given us a good lowdown. On the new arrival, I mean," Blaster smiled again, "We don't even got a name for her yet. All we've heard is that they're here."

Ironhide's frown narrowed. "Prime'll send out a message when he gets the okay from the kid. It ain't my business ta say," he clipped.

Blaster sighed. "This isn't for the rumor-mill, man." He kept his voice down and leaned in closer. "Look just give me a little peace of processor, and tell me how the kids are hanging, really? Is Frenzy okay? Are they gonna be alright?"

Ironhide took a drink, giving him a moment to choose his words. "Frenzy? Kid's fine," he finally replied, "Should be outta the Med Bay by the end of the week." The old mech put his cube down and faced it blankly. "Little one...is little. We're just waitin' ta see." Ironhide glanced over his shoulder at the rest of the room and sighed. "Aid's a good docbot, he's watching her."

Blaster looked down into his cube, taking in the news. "Well'a listen, I been musin' things over with my boys and we just wanted to let Frenzy know that if he wants—"

The old mech cut the other Autobot off with a shake of his head. "Ratch tol' me earlier today, Blaster. Everything that kid's chassis' been through in this, components getting rebuilt, replaced or plain switched around. They don' think he can transform anymore."

Nodding somberly, the communications bot turned back to his drink. "Cassette transformations are fiddly, complex, little glitches; I know. But that...man, that's rough. How's he holdin' up?"

"Slag. I don' know." Ironhide mumbled. "Kid's like a bullhorn in a cinderblock wall. Yellin' half the time."

"But still not letting anybot through?"

Ironhide nodded. "Fer the most part. Ah hell, but ya didn' hear that from me. I'm not even s'poss..."

"Hey I'm in communications, I know when to keep a lid on it." Blaster picked up his cube and used it to gesture to Ironhide. "This is just you and me, one concerned mech to another. And thanks." He slipped away from the bar and back into the crowds.

Ironhide didn't get much time to drink alone though, only a few minutes later he was joined by another mech at his side. This one much taller and broader than Blaster.

"I take it ya seen the kids by now?" Ironhide spoke into the edge of his cube as he raised it to his intakes.

Gesturing for a cube, the other mech leaned one elbow nonchalantly on the bar. "I did," Optimus Prime answered, "Almost an hour ago."

Ironhide pulled the cube away from his mouth for a moment. "And?"

After glancing at the nearest mechs, Prime leaned in closer, dropping his volume. "Probation. And probably community service later." He straightened up to take the cube from the server. "Thank you Skids." The blue, boxy bartender smiled at the Autobot leader.

Once Skids had moved away Ironhide snorted. "Community service?"

"Seems fitting, doesn't it?"

"Fitting yeah. But good luck convincin' the kid."

"I'm not going to be the one doing the convincing." Optimus looked at Ironhide pointedly.

"Optimus," Ironhide rumbled, a cagy hunch bowing his shoulders. "What are ya gettin' at?"

"He respects you Ironhide. And you obviously care about him."

"Now Prime I—"

Optimus raised his hand to quiet his friend. "He needs someone Ironhide. Frenzy may be a parent now, but, whether or not his daughter..." Prime trailed off, voice somber. "He's got a lot of growing up to do regardless, and I need someone to carry him through that. Now I realize you've really just fallen into all this. So I'm giving you one chance to walk away, and I'll find someone else."

"What the slag do ya want me ta be?" Ironhide blustered, "His parole officer? His dad?"

"I think somewhere between is what he needs most, Ironhide."

Rubbing his optics with his hand, Ironhide leaned heavier against the table. "Slag, I'm not programmed fer this."

"That's not what Chromia thinks."

"An who tol' you that?" The security bot asked with narrowed optics.

"I have my sources." Optimus answered taking the cube in his hand.

"Dammit Elita." Ironhide muttered,

"So I take it you're in?"

Ironhide sighed. "Do ya even have ta ask?" He polished off all but the last of his cube.

"Had to follow Autobot protocol. You know that."

"You and yer precious protocol. Keeps us drinkin' our high-grade in a place that doesn't exist, with a bartender we can't talk about outside'a the bay."

Optimus chuckled and waved his cube around the room. "Now how would our posterity take it, if they knew that I was the first Prime in countless epochs to go against Cybertronian military law and allow the serving of high-grade on military vessels? And by military personnel?" The Autobot leader dropped his voice again. "Speaking of posterity, we have a name for our new addition." Ironhide waited expectantly. "Crasher."

The old mech laughed. "Perfect," he muttered, "too perfect."

"So," Prime raised his cube, the pink high-grade sloshing and glittering, "To Crasher."

Ironhide touched the side of his cube to his leader's with a smile. "To Crasher." He drained the last few drops of his cube.

Optimus set his down at the side of the bar. "Well, I've got work to do."

"As always."

"You're staying?"

"Well given what I just volunteered myself fer, this might be the last time I get ta be in here fer a while. Might as well get my high-grade in while I can." He pulled Prime's cube over to himself.

Prime patted his friend's shoulder before heading toward the doors marked with the large grey F's. A few curious eyes followed him out, but almost none paid much attention to the large sign hanging right above where the Autobot Leader exited.

It read:

Thank you for stopping by Skid's Cargo Hold F.

REMEMBER:

There is NO Cargo Hold F.

There is NO Skids.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The TV in the Med Bay was off. Frenzy was tired of flipping through channels that he wasn't going to watch. He lay back on the berth, staring at the high orange ceiling through the dim light, finally recovered enough from the trials of the past couple days to have lost the ability to fall asleep on his own. But the first thing he'd recovered was his frustration.

Frenzy didn't know what was frustrating him more, the constant hammering home every waking second that his life had changed completely and irrevocably, or the fact that his new life was proving so frustratingly boring. Like being suspended from a magnet over a smelting pool boring, the very precariousness of the situation and the sneaking suspicious that death was lurking nearby made the boredom even more painful.

It wasn't _comfortable,_ lying around wondering if the bad luck had finally quit firing on him, or was just taking a moment to reload. But the real grit in the gears was the gnawing fear that if the run of bad luck started up again that Frenzy wouldn't be the only one hit.

He turned his head slightly to glance across the room. Hoist was taking his turn keeping vigil over the sparkberth. In the dim light the machines surrounding the smaller berth were lit up like the Fleshies' Vegas. Or Kaon under siege.

Again and again over the past two days, every stupid docbot would start talking to Frenzy by assuring him that everything was alright. And they always followed up each assurance with a 'but' and some kind of explanation or detail that Frenzy only pretended to understand out of nervousness. He was a _warrior_. He couldn't tell the difference between cosmotron and a commutator if Crasher's life depended on it. Which it apparently did.

It seemed like Crasher's life depended on any number of things. From machines that whirred and hissed and were taller than the berth, to microscopic circuit chips and wires measured in atom widths. But not on Frenzy. He almost wondered that they let him watch. All the Autobots had needed from him was a name for her, a couple statements, and a stack of datapads to fill out taller than his arm.

Frenzy hadn't yet been alone with her. He hadn't yet held her, or spoken more than one word to her. He'd hardly even touched her, hadn't yet said her name to her face. Whatever doctor, medic, or scientist was in the room had been by her side in an astrosecond the few times she'd made so much as a squeak. They'd talk to her, touch her. Sometimes First Aid would lift her out of the berth, cupping her carefully in the center of his palm as if she were a squishy's baby. Like some human holding a newborn kitten. Frenzy only watched. Noting which parts of her looked like him, which parts of her looked like Megatron, and which parts of her looked only too easy to break.

The doctors, First Aid and Hoist in particular had done their part coddling Frenzy to Crasher's side, encouraging him to talk to her or touch her, but always warning him to be gentle. And then they would stand there and watch. Or they would find something to 'do' but always with the corner of their optics on Frenzy, waiting expectantly. For what? Some kind of nurture programming to kick in? A script of long forgotten parent-child talk to be dredged from the back of his datatracks?

And Frenzy would stand there. Staring at her like a drone. Waiting for something to happen.


	26. Chapter 26

The morning Crasher was four days old, Frenzy put his mark on official defection documents and Ironhide was formerly made Frenzy's guardian.

By early afternoon the old Autobot was already having doubts.

The former Decepticon had reacted rather calmly to the news that he'd been assigned a guardian. A passive shrug between channel changes was the only indication that he'd even heard what Ironhide and First Aid were telling him. Like rain on a freshly waxed hood, everything seemed to slide right off.

An hour sitting by the new creator's berth, and all Ironhide had managed to do was get the kid to turn off the TV he wasn't watching and instead turn on some of the parenting datapads that he wasn't really reading. When Ironhide suggested they go across the Med Bay to Crasher Frenzy shrugged again.

"I already looked at her this morning," he mumbled, "You can go stare all you like."

"Frenzy..." Ironhide rumbled. The Mini-Cassette looked up from the datapad he was thumbing through. Ironhide didn't know if it was the glowing visor or the way his mouth was quirked in permanent confusion, but Frenzy looked as dazed and bewildered as a deer staring down the high beams of an oncoming car. A persistent state of shock had settled in.

Rather than answer Frenzy's look, Ironhide stood up with a grunt, and marched over the sparkberth across the room. He gave the recharging sparkling a glance, and then marched around the berth to where First Aid had set up a workstation within arm's reach of any of the machines supporting Crasher. Gripping the Autobot Doctor's shoulder, Ironhide leaned close to his audial.

"We need ta talk," the older Autobot hissed. He stood up, glanced at Crasher again, then strode purposefully out of the Med Bay. A few moments later, after checking the monitors and readouts on every online machine in the room, First Aid followed.

The lights in the Med Bay observatory were still dimmed when First Aid found Ironhide looking down through the viewpane at the young mech he'd been assigned. First Aid closed the door behind him, and after a moment's consideration, locked it.

"Aid, there is something wrong with that kid." Ironhide rumbled, without turning to look at the other mech. "What's he been doin' the past three days?"

First Aid took a place next to Ironhide looking down at both of his patients. "TV and recharge mostly. He _is_ still recovering from some pretty serious system shock." First Aid admitted. "He does spend some time—"

"Starin' at her. Nothin' more." Ironhide frowned.

"Ironhide...after what Frenzy's been through—"

"He won't touch her. He won't even talk to her. It's like he's scared of her or somethin'." Ironhide turned to First Aid. "Have _you_ ever seen anything like it before?"

First Aid considered this new wrinkle Ironhide had brought up, rather upset that once again a problem he'd missed had to be pointed out to him. "Well...when a sparkling has been under some medical distress sometimes the creators are frightened of harming their offspring."

"That could only be 'bout half of it. I mean look at 'em," Ironhide gestured into the Med Bay, "Kid's as far away from that sparkberth as he can get."

"Maybe he's afraid of becoming attached." First Aid offered. "We've warned Frenzy that Crasher could offline."

Ironhide snorted, "I'm not a software technician, Aid. I can't pick a processor apart just by watching. I just know enough ta know that a problem this deep probably has half-a-dozen reasons buried one on top a' the other. But the _problem_ still is that the kid needs to hold his kid. An' I think we ain't gonna get more than a few steps closer ta where we _need_ ta get till that happens."

A soft cry came up from the sparkberth. First Aid stepped away from the window, but Ironhide grabbed his arm.

"Wait." Ironhide commanded.

"But—"

"There's not a _medical_ problem is there?"

"No but—"

"Then wait." The Security 'Bot pulled First Aid up to the window of the observation deck. The wailing from the berth became louder, an alarum for attention.

"That's it kiddo." Ironhide mumbled, with a small grin, "Make him come over there."

Frenzy was surprised that no one had come in yet. He kept staring at the Med Bay doors, expecting that any astrosecond First Aid, or at least Hoist, would come striding in to answer the sparkling's cries. Nearly a minute passed while Crasher's crying became more and more desperate. Frenzy glared at the doors, more than a little furious at First Aid for not coming. _Where's that damn docbot? What if there was a problem?_

_Shit. What if there's a problem?_

Frenzy slid off his berth, looking around the room just in case there was someone else, someone who could maybe possibly deal with this, hiding in one of the corners. He was completely alone except for the shrieking, infant robot.

Frenzy tiptoed across the floor, creeping up on the berth reluctantly, alternating his watch between the Med Bay door, the sparkberth, and the machines around the sparkberth. He stopped beside the berth and looked down in it. Crasher's alarms assailed his audials, worming their way into a pit of fretfulness deep in his chassis.

He studied tubes and wires connected to different points around her fragile body nervously, but as far as he could tell nothing seemed out of place, and none of the lights seemed to indicate any danger. As far as _he_ could tell. _What the frag was she screaming for? _Her little optic band was flashing gold; her tiny arms were curled over her chest and twitching with the effort of her nonverbal alarm. _What the hell does it want? _Frenzy wondered, _And where the Pit is First Aid?_

He took one step closer, and Crasher turned her head in the direction he'd come. One tiny arm uncurled itself toward him, but the crying continued at the same pitch. Frenzy looked around the room, and then back at his sparkling.

"Hh—hey," he gripped the edge of the sparkberth and leaned his head over. "Hey." he said again, flatly.

Her arms flailed up at him, the tiny, delicately jointed, fingers grasping weakly at the air clumsily, hydraulics still not completely online. Her mouth was open and the alarms had turned into a pulsing whine that echoed plaintively in the empty Med Bay.

"Hey." Frenzy whispered at her, absorbing how light glinted off the plating on her wavering, outstretched arms. Suddenly she kicked at the tubes and wires under her feet, and began screaming in earnest again.

"Hey!" Frenzy yelped, "You! Stop that! You—You're gonna break somethin' important!" He stared pleadingly at the Med Bay doors in vain. "Cool it!" He begged. In desperation he reached into the berth and put one hand over Crasher's thrashing knee joints. Her crying stopped again, more out of surprise than calm.

_Frag,_ Frenzy thought, _this plating feels thin as paper._ Still he left his hand where it was. For a good fifteen seconds there was a tense silence, where Frenzy almost had time to relax a micron. But a new wave of dread hit him when Crasher flopped her head from side to side and whimpered. _Oh Primus, don't let her start up again..._

"Shhhh..." he mumbled "Just shhhhhush it." He kept his voice low, like he was sneaking up on an unsuspecting victim. He moved his hand from her legs up over her chassis. His other hand drifted into the berth to cup her helm. "Take it easy, believe me this ain't nothin' to be screamin' about." He mumbled. "Just First Aid bein' lazy s'all." She whined again as her arms came down to rest on the hand curled over nearly all her chestplate. Her fingers clutched loosely at his smallest finger.

"Shit." Frenzy whispered. He traced the front of Crasher's crest with his thumb. He could feel her miniature engine purring beneath the warm, thin chestplate under his palm. Her visor was still turned on him, the golden hazy light growing dimmer as she lost focus. She let another soft cry, maybe at Frenzy's silence.

"Just cool it Crash." He said. Her little black hand still gripped his finger weakly.

As she calmed down a frown slowly spread across Frenzy's faceplates. He pulled his hands back and shuddered involuntarily, looking at his feet and digging his thumb into his finger joint. Crasher stirred, and whimpered at the missing attention but Frenzy could only mumble at his feet. "Come on," he soothed, "Shut the hell up."

At the sound of the Med Bay doors opening, Frenzy whirled around.

"I wasn't hurtin' her!" he yelped, hands raised in surrender. Crasher jerked at the sudden sharp noise and started wailing again. First Aid was at the berth side in a sparkpulse. Ironhide couldn't decide between sighing and shaking his head as he walked over to his new charge.

"Of course you weren't kid." Ironhide replied, stopping to stand hip to shoulder with Frenzy. They watched while First Aid scooped the crying sparkling up in one hand. Her alarums began to die down again as the doctor cradled her close and checked her systems. After a moment Ironhide revved his engines into something like a cough. First Aid looked up from his infant patient to see the old Autobot jerking his head meaningfully, but subtly, toward Frenzy. First Aid looked from sparkling to creator thoughtfully.

"Would you like to hold her Frenzy?" First Aid offered.

"Wha—" Frenzy took a step back. "Like now?" his voice cracked.

"Yes." First Aid answered. "She's very stable right now, and wanting some attention obviously. You can hold her if you'd like."

"But-but, you're holding her. It's only just stopped cryin'." Frenzy twisted his hands nervously.

"Why don't you hold her now, while I get her next energon feed set up?" First Aid suggested. "Ironhide can you pull a chair over?" the doctor asked.

"What if I drop her?"

"You'll be sitting down."

"What if she cries?"

"I'm not going anywhere Frenzy." First Aid reassured, "I'm just going to prepare some fuel for her."

Ironhide pulled the chair over and Frenzy stared at it like the oversized piece of furniture was red hot and covered in Morphobots. "Am I gonna break her?" Frenzy asked Ironhide.

"I don' know kid." Ironhide answered, taking Frenzy's shoulder and guiding him to sit in the chair. "Are ya?"

"Fuck." Frenzy hissed as he shifted this way and that in the chair, feeling, if possible, even more unstable sitting than standing. First Aid came around from the other side of the sparkberth, trailing wires and tubes behind him. He bent over at the waist and held out Crasher in one hand, securing her with the other. Frenzy looked down at his offered offspring.

"Hold out your arms Frenzy." First Aid prompted.

"How?"

"Like yer carryin' a football." Ironhide demonstrated with his arms. "Like yer carryin' a really special, really fragile football." Frenzy mimicked Ironhide's example, and watched in horror as First Aid slid Crasher from where she was safely cupped in his hands into Frenzy's arms. The infant sparkling gave a panicked squeak, her thin grey arms flailing up. Frenzy knew he wasn't the only one who didn't feel safe with this.

His hands instinctively opened out of the tight fists he hadn't realized he was clenching them in, and his fingers splayed out to hold her steadier. His whole body locked into place, yet danced on the edge of action, prepared in case she should go leaping out of his arms. He craned his head down as far as he could without moving his chest a micron. _Oh, Primus...what if my equilibrium circuits shut down?_ His feet didn't reach the floor in this chair, and with his arms occupied he had no way to steady himself.

"How does it feel kid?" Ironhide asked, smiling.

It felt like he could snap it in two on a whim. _Frag, I've ripped things apart with my bare hands that were ten times stronger than this._ He'd crushed rocks and now he was cupping eggshells. A few pounds of pressure, a few inches pulling in different directions, and Crasher would be just a pile of cardboard thin scraps. There was nothing standing between his strength and her weakness but the absolute petrified horror Frenzy felt as he realized how easily his hands could crumple the universe.

His thumb dared to move to trace her jawline. He could see the thin, pulsing cables in her neck joints as she turned her head into the touch. One violent hand cupped her helm. Her light, warm, little body settled into his arms with the weight of a world.

"I'm not slaggin' it up yet? Am I?" Frenzy asked, and Ironhide almost thought he was asking his daughter. He patted Frenzy on the shoulder, which made the Mini-Cassette jump a megamile's worth in a micron.

"Frag!" Frenzy hissed, "Don't fraggin' do that!" Crasher flailed again, and let out a warning cry. Frenzy tightened his grip a little.

"Yer doin' fine. Just relax." Ironhide grinned. First Aid looked up from where he was preparing the energon, watching them carefully but casually.

Frenzy didn't think he ever would relax holding something as breakable as Crasher, not with his only real proven skill set being in the realm of breaking things. Still, he managed to calm his nerves just enough to remind his mind what his body already remembered; that this weird-looking, little robot he was holding had, only a few days before, been hidden inside him. She was _his_. His sparkling. His creation. His daughter. _This_ is what all that fuss had been about. _I have a daughter_, Frenzy repeated to himself, _This is mine._ He hoped that repeating it enough would eventually make it _feel_ as real as it was. She squirmed; curling closer to the warmth of her parent's scarred chestplate. Frenzy tried his hardest not to fall over.

Seven weeks ago, Frenzy's world had been normal. In the simple, thoughtless, little life that he'd cruised a path of destruction through, a nice Decepticon shell -inside and out- was his entire sphere. He was surrounded, supported, controlled by towering giants like Soundwave, Megatron, or Starscream. Rumble was there with him, giving him just enough trustful companionship, just enough love, to get by. Life was comfortable in its regularity, secure in its strength, and with flaws, pains, and trials predictable enough to be made almost bearable. And most importantly, it didn't require a bit of thought on Frenzy's part.

All that was stripped away now, and Frenzy was exposed to a wasteland of unknowns; with the mirage, the memory, of the old way still throwing ghostly shadows across his mind, across his heart. And everything that had come before was twisted by his new perspective. There wasn't a hole to hide in anymore. No maxim, no philosophy, no leader to bury each accusatory thought, each unrepented wrong, each unhealed scar behind.

Primus, he hadn't been in a real battle in _months_. He hadn't killed anyone in longer.

For the first time in his life, Frenzy was bigger than the universe was. And instead of pulling him, guiding him, commanding him and controlling him, he was holding its weakness in his arms. The future was looking up at him with a hazy, golden light, and without saying a word asking him: 'What will _you_ do now?'

"Fuck..." Frenzy whispered. "Oh Pit, I don't know...Shit." His arms tightened, ever so slightly, pulling Crasher in closer like she was made of smoke. Frenzy's face had fallen into a tight frown, and one dangling foot kicked the other anxiously. His visor drifted up so that he was staring straight ahead, lost in a dark, unnerving thought. Until he felt a tiny hand brush against his chestplate, then he looked down and felt the war in his mind quiet into a temporary truce.

His sparkling was curled against his chest, resting right over where she'd grown the past few weeks. Over the scar where the gash in Frenzy's plating had been. The place where she'd fought for life. And she was tiny, and she was sickly, and she looked a little too much like Frenzy, and a lot too much like Megatron. She _was_ a sawed-off little scrap, just like Rumble said she would be. And she was beautiful.

And Frenzy loved her.

Frenzy _knew_ he did. Because inside him was terror; was shame that he felt a desperate need to cling to fiercely. Because it was love. It didn't really _fix_ anything. All the problems and uncertainty still waited. An impossible maze he would have to smash his way out of eventually. But it was _something_. Sure, it presented its own dilemmas. But he loved Crasher. He'd already loved her, and he'd told her so. It was something to hold on to; something to hide in, even if it stung a little.

First Aid approached holding a small container of pale pink energon in one hand, and a funnel with a flexible tube for a nozzle. Frenzy smirked at the equipment.

"Since when did this become a frat party?" He snarked.

Ironhide sighed, but couldn't wipe the crooked grin he'd been wearing for the past few minutes off his faceplates. Being proven right always felt good. But watching Frenzy hold his sparkling had left him with a deeper glow, one that made all the blows to the head and hours of Bonanza completely worthwhile.

"I thought you had _read_ your datapads?" First Aid chided. He shook the end of the nozzle at him. "This is how you feed a sparkling." Cocking his head to the side, the doctor considered. "I think this would be easier if she was back in her berth."

Frenzy glanced at the sparkling still clumsily pawing his chestplate. Finally, sighing, he nodded and shifted his arms, offering her back. First Aid put down the feeding equipment and carefully gathered Crasher up. She whined and fidgeted in First Aid's hand as he walked back over to the berth.

"Whadda ya know kid," Ironhide patted Frenzy's back, "She already misses ya."

Frenzy sat empty-armed in the chair for only an astrosecond before scrambling off and walking to peer into the sparkling berth. First Aid held up the funnel and waved him closer. "Here, I'll show you how it's done Frenzy. Then maybe next time, you can try it." First Aid turned around, searching. "Ironhide... you should probably learn this too."

With a wry grin of resignation, Ironhide walked over to the sparkberth.

XXXX

"This civil council has been convened by Primary Order under File 38 Folder C of the Autobot Civil Reorganization Stratocracy Directive. I ask that all present who are appointed to said civil council, acknowledge that you are aware of the dual nature of Autobot Government and affirm that you are Autobots and that you understand that by so affirming you are also declaring position in the Autobot Military." Prowl looked at each of the mechs seated around the large, wide, table: Ratchet, Hoist, First Aid, and Ironhide. Each of the mechs nodded casually in answer to the formality. Prowl logged the responses into his datapad.

Ironhide tried to look just bored enough to express his opinion that this official council was unnecessary, but not to the point of Contempt of Military Tribunals. He wished he felt cheeky enough to fiddle with the datapad sitting idly in front of him on the table. _Kidda'd be furious if he knew we were havin' full scale official councils over him. _Ironhide thought dryly_. I swear, if I'd known I'd hafta sit on one'a these damn committees..._

"The express purpose of this civil council is fourfold. One: to provide oversight into the integration of Decepticon defector- designation: Frenzy, possible Cognitive Minor- into the Autobot population stationed on Autobase: Ark 1, location: planet Earth, Sol system, sector 1138 according to the Xaaron starmap. Two: to deliberate on and determine the legal status of the aforementioned defector, and the terms and conditions of the probation period in accordance with Cybertronian Law and the directives of local Terran governments. Three: to oversee and discuss the welfare, care, and custody of Sub-Adult Cybertronian, designation: Crasher, offspring of Decepticon defector Frenzy, including the conditions required for custody rights of said parent to be retained, in accordance with Autobot Civil Code and discretion of the council. Four: to determine and provide for the long term growth, duties, functions, allowances, and necessities of aforementioned defector Frenzy and Sub-Adult offspring Crasher."

Prowl once again looked around the table. "Do all present here on the council understand this civil council's express purpose, and agree to the duties and responsibilities of sitting on said council?" Another round of obligatory nods from the mechs. Prowl smiled and took his seat, his posture becoming relaxed. "Good, now that _that's_ over with, we can begin." He gestured to the head of the table. "First Aid, do you want to start?"

First Aid nodded and stood up, datapad in hand, and Ironhide wondered how much more information he already knew was going to be regurgitated at him for the sake of those less informed. He was relieved when First Aid simply held up the datapad and said, "This is the entirety of my case notes regarding Frenzy. I gave each of you a copy. This information is confidential and these meetings are private. Nothing is to be discussed outside this council, understand?"

The latest round of nods was interrupted by the door unexpectedly opening. Red Alert strode purposefully into the conference room and took one of the empty seats on the end. Ironhide's surprise was quickly overtaken by a deep feeling of resignation.

"Uhh...Red Alert." Hoist began timidly, "This is a _private_ committee."

"Yes." The security director slid a datapad down to Prowl, "A private committee that I am now a member of."

"But, why?" First Aid asked. Ironhide shared a knowing look with Ratchet from across the table. _Does he even have to ask?_

"File 6 Folder 2 of the Guidelines for Management of Defectors, in the Military Code, states clearly that all probationary councils, civil or military, of former Decepticon combatants must have a security officer sitting on the council."

"I'm right here Red." Ironhide grumbled, sucking back his frustration and waiting for the inevitable loophole that Red Alert had found.

"Ah, but you are here as Frenzy's appointed guardian, Ironhide, and the in the Cybertronian Civil Codes; specifically Code 217: Procedures Regarding Sub-Adult Cybertronians and Cognitive Minors, a guardian of a Sub-Adult, confirmed Cognitive Minor, _or_ Microsized Adult cannot serve any position on a council empowered to make custody decisions relating to his or her charge except as the guardian, as holding another position would constitute a conflict of interest." Red slid a datapad down the table to Prowl. "Signed by Prime, as all of you can check if you wish. I _am_ on this council by direct order. Now, please continue."

"Okay then," Prowl frowned at the datapad, then waved First Aid on. "This all looks in order, First Aid, go ahead."

The Autobot doctor seemed flustered, but began again "As I was saying, all of you, except, um, Red Alert that is, have a copy of my case notes-"

"I have a copy." Red Alert cut in, "I accessed it earlier today." He pulled out a similar datapad to the one all the mechs around the table had brought with them.

The doctor paused for a beat in surprise. "Well, have you—"

"Yes." Red Alert nodded at First Aid, "I've read it. Now continue."

"Ah, Well, then..." First Aid looked down at his datapad for guidance. "If we've all read it all, uh, then you all should have seen that Frenzy should be recovered enough to be released from the Med Bay in the next few days, though I want to keep Crasher there for another couple weeks. Prime has had Frenzy confined to the Med Bay, but now it's up to us, this council, to decide if we want him released, and if we do, what conditions we want to put on him." The doctor awkwardly took his seat.

Prowl stood up with the datapad. "Actually," he started, evenly, "Our first decision really needs to be Frenzy's legal status, since that would affect everything else we'll be deliberating. We need to rule on whether or not he is a Cognitive Minor."

"Given what I've read," Hoist tapped on his datapad, "It seems pretty clear that he's on the borderline, obviously he's been deprived of processor-developing stimulus by being cooped up in subspace for long periods of time. What do you who've worked with him think? How immature do you suppose his coding is?"

"It's too scattershot to make an all-encompassing judgment," First Aid answered, "Some circuits seem fully mature, others haven't written themselves with anything like adult coding."

"Are you sayin' he's malfunctional?" Ironhide scoffed, "Cus' the kid isn't dumb. He may not be a Wheeljack or a Perceptor but he sure as heck isn't any Dinobot."

"No, they're not saying _that_ Ironhide." Ratchet explained dryly, "They're wondering if his processor, because of a lack of stimulus information, hasn't _yet_ matured to an adult level."

"Well of course it hasn't. Anybot who's been with 'im can tell ya that."

"That's not just it Ironhide." Hoist tried to clarify, "If we decide Frenzy is a Cognitive Minor, we are saying that his logic circuits and memory banks weren't developed enough to gather sufficient data and process it correctly so he could make completely rational decisions. If he is processing at a Sub-Adult level, it would make him, legally a Stage 3 Sub-Adult."

Prowl sat down in order to lean in on the discussion from everybots' optic level. "Yes, and while ruling him legally a Sub-Adult would make the whole probation process easier - he would only have to repay or replace one third of all the damages incurred while a Decepticon - it has its drawbacks too. He would not be able to take over full custody of Crasher until we'd proven he'd matured to an adult level. We could only allow him to care for her now with a considerable amount of oversight." The tactician gestured around the table, "Oversight that, I assume, would be provided by the committee."

Red Alert nodded vigorously. "Making him a Cognitive Minor _would_ make it easier to sever his parental rights should the need arise."

To Ironhide's relief, Ratchet jumped right in to take a turn battling the Security Director. "Well yes, but that's not what we're after here, Red."

"That might not be what we're after," the Lamborghini replied, "But, given what I've read, that might be what is necessary if Frenzy is unable to recover psychologically from Megatron's violation."

A sudden stiffness settled on the council, rigid with unease. Each mech found a fixed spot on the table or beyond someone's head to stare at, afraid of accidently meeting another set of optics and having to read the reaction he found there.

"I had put in," First Aid began, hesitantly, "To be discussed this meeting, a request to require some sessions of memory core analysis and meta-processor therapy be necessary for Frenzy's parole."

"Yes," Hoist lifted his optic band to meet First Aid's, united by similar disposition, "The more we understand what Frenzy is thinking and feeling about... _this_, the better this council will be able to deliberate."

"Now wait just an astrosecond," Ironhide leaned one elbow on the table and jabbed the tabletop pointedly with his finger. "What do you mean 'memory core analysis'?" He demanded.

"It's standard protocol, Ironhide." First Aid explained, confused by Ironhide's hostility, "For instance, following serious injury, prolonged captivity, or abuse."

Prowl laced his fingers on the table, countenance both grim and thoughtful. "If the information in these datapads is correct. If Frenzy really felt he had no choice but to submit to Megatron's requests, then at the very least what we're dealing with is a clear case of intimate abuse. If we rule that Frenzy is a Cognitive Minor," the tactician drew in everyone's optics, "Well then, I think we all know what we're dealing with."

Ratchet held up the datapad. "It's pretty obvious from what I've read here- transcripts of your talks with him, First Aid- that Frenzy has some pretty serious unresolved anger about his entire situation. And Megatron specifically."

"Anger and hate that could be carried over to his sparkling." Hoist added.

Ironhide squared his shoulders. "Look, I saw them together jus' earlier today, and that kid _loves_ his sparklin'," he objected. "Primus, she's all he's got now. She's the reason he's here. And ya know he's got more than enough ta deal with without draggin' 'im through all that other stuff again. What's past is done." Ironhide's head dropped and his fists balled up so his faceplates wouldn't have to. "Can't ya just let 'im forget?"

"That's exactly it Ironhide," Ratchet explained evenly, before Red Alert could get a word in. "This isn't something that anyone ever really forgets. It has a way of sinking down core deep. And with Crasher, little, red, black, and gunmetal grey Crasher, right in front of him all the time...There's no way in the sixteen galaxies he's gonna forget where, and who, she really came from." Ironhide stared at his datapad as the medic continued.

"Don't you ever wonder Ironhide, when he's looking at her, what he really sees?"


	27. Chapter 27

A/N: Ho! Ho! Ho! Santa's bringing a wonderful present to all you pronstalkers and fanwankers and angstwallowers here on FFdotNet! After months and months of abscence I have here in my sack an extra long update for 'Trapped'! Lets see what else you're getting for Christmas...*rifles through sack* Hmm...looks like the good little girls and boys are getting angst, Ironhide fuzz, and whats this here at the bottom? *examines* Slash? *holds up slash* Who wanted slash for Christmas? It says right here! 'Non-explicit, PG rated Slash'?

XXXXXXXXX

"Ready for your big day kid?" Ironhide asked the little red mech who was sitting with a frown on the edge of the med berth that'd been home for the better part of two weeks.

Frenzy didn't feel ready. Another day stuck in the Med Bay just might kill him. He didn't like the idea of leaving either. Luckily for him he hadn't had a ton of choice in the matter. They were going to have to move into his new quarters sooner or later. For Crasher it would be later, but that was supposed to give Frenzy time to settle in.

So he slid off the berth, gathering a box of datapads, cleaning cloths, and medicated top coat for his still mending plating. On top of the pile he threw the red and black Chamois of Friendship that Bumblebee had sent him from 'some of the guys.' Embroidered on one side was, 'Congratulations Dad!' on the other was 'Function Optimally Soon!" Frenzy had surprised himself when he tried his best to pretend like he wanted to appreciate the gift.

"Okay, ready." Frenzy tried on his best brave smirk and strolled after Ironhide to the Med Bay door, but stopped at the threshold and looked over his shoulder thoughtfully. Ironhide took the box Frenzy was carrying in one hand and gave Frenzy a little shove back into the Med Bay.

"Go on, say goodbye."

Hoist was tinkering anxiously around the berth, but Frenzy didn't give the Autobot doctor more than half a glance as he darted over to Crasher's side.

Frenzy's gripped the edge of the sparkberth and poked at the week-old sparkling's hand. The sparkling rolled her head listlessly in the direction of the touch, optic visor glimmering.

"See ya later, Crash." Frenzy mumbled, lingering just long enough to slip his finger into Crasher's hand and feel the microsized hydralics tighten around his warm plating. He drank her in with his sensors for a second, then pulled away. The Cassette shuffled back over to Ironhide waiting by the door.

"Don't worry kid." Ironhide smiled as he keyed them out of the Med Bay. "We'll be back to visit her tanight."

As Ironhide led the way, Frenzy glanced up and down every hall, watching to see who they passed; but he became nonchalant the instant they were noticed. It was well into the Day shift, and the halls were busy. They passed Sunstreaker, Huffer, three out of five Aerialbots, and half a dozen other 'Bots Frenzy couldn't identify without staring at them, which was the exact opposite of what the Minicassette wanted to do. Frenzy could feel the Autobots' stares burning into his plating. Walking through the lie of pretending to be a defector had been hard enough, walking through the same halls with the truth hanging over his head was almost unbearable; like someone had burned 'Traitor' on his helm, and pasted a big 'Pity Me' sign onto his back.

Frenzy nearly collapsed in relief when he reached his quarters. The door closed, shutting out the waves of curiosity, sympathy, and distrust that seemed to radiate from the Autobots with enough potency to leave clouds of emotional fallout clinging to the orange halls.

Ironhide put the box of Frenzy's things on the berth and straightened up to look around the room. The air was tense and fragile, but stale. He gave Frenzy a reassuring smile, "Listen, I gotta few things ta take care of, so why don't you situate yourself here? I'll be back for ya in an hour or so ta show you where you'll be workin' and talk ya through yer schedule. Okay?"

Frenzy sat on the edge of his berth, and nodded, wishing that something snarky would pop out of his processor so he could stop feeling like a sack of hauled-around wing-nuts. "Have fun." he offered lamely, and only half as sarcastic sounding as he wanted.

When Ironhide had left, Frenzy slid off the berth and poked in all the nooks and crannies of his new quarters. He should have been enjoying _this_ at least. The Decepticons never would have given him his own room. But instead he felt a strange disgust gnawing him. A vague sense that he shouldn't have this, or that he shouldn't _need_ to have this. He was a drop of water, and the whole damn room was Autobot snake-oil; he slid around the walls touching every corner, but completely failing to settle in.

The workstation in one corner was just his size and still reeked of new welds; Frenzy sat down at the computer terminal and booted it up. A large Autobot Insignia filled the screen, rotating while the terminal hummed to life.

The sigil faded out, and orange words appeared on the blue screen.

**[Autobot User Name: ]**

Frenzy frowned at the screen, and then at the keyboard of white, unmarked keys. After a few false starts he finally found the location of the right script keys. "Slaggin' stupid, light-up, computer shit," the Minicassette muttered.

He typed in 'Frenzy.'

The computer blinked and flickered at him for a moment before responding.

**[User Name {**Frenzy**} Accepted]**

**[Limited Access Only]**

**[Enter Program Code: ]**

**[To Search Teletraan 1 Mainframe Press Alpha One]**

Frenzy frowned and fumbled around until he found the Alpha One key.

**[Enter Search Term: ]**

Frenzy typed in 'Map of Base'

The Computer beeped at him.

**[Search Complete]**

**[Access denied] **

**[Authorization of Administrator Required]**

**[Enter Authorization Code: ]**

**[To Return to Search Press Alpha Two]**

Frenzy sighed and hit Alpha Two, when the search screen came up again he tried 'Frenzy'

**[Search Complete]**

**[Limited Access Results:]**

**[ 1.} General Memo THX1186: Re. Decepticon Defector]**

**[2.} General Memo THX1190: Re. Power Outage of 111.27.975]**

**[3.} General Memo THX1198: Delivery Announcement]**

**[To Return to Search Press Alpha Two]**

Frenzy hit the keys to open the last memo.

**[General Memo THX1198: Delivery Announcement]**

**[To: All Autobots.]**

**[At 111.29.108 Decepticon Defector Frenzy was delivered of a femme sparkling in Autobot Med Bay. Creator and offspring are in recovery. Well-wishes and prayers are requested. ]**

**[Sender: First Aid]**

**[112.14.334] **

**[To Return to Search Results Press Alpha Three]**

**[To Return to Search Press Alpha Two]**

Frenzy grumbled and hit Alpha Two, the click echoing in the empty quarters.

**[Enter Search Term: ]**

The Mini-Cassette stared at the screen, started to type 'Crasher' but then thought better of it. He drummed his fingertips over the keyboard, making plinking noises, before typing in 'Why?'

The terminal hummed for a second.

**[Search Term Undefined]**

**[To Return to Search Press Alpha Two]**

Frenzy leaned back in the chair with a sigh, hanging his head back until he could see, upside-down, the blue corner of the room with the empty sparkberth. He flicked at the probationary locator beacon affixed to his chest and wondered exactly how long 'an hour or so' would be. Finally he straightened up and hit Alpha Two again.

**[Enter Search Term: ]**

Frenzy typed in 'Rumble' and hit enter.

XXXXXXXXXXX

"So we've got everything in order then, right? He's cleared for all this?"

First Aid, glanced from his datapad to the datapad being held out to him. "Hmm? Oh. Yes, Ironhide, as long as it's under an hour a waking cycle, it should be alright." The Autobot Doctor leaned wearily against the doorway to his quarters, and started poking away at his own datapad again. "An hour if he's just using his piledrivers, half that if he's flying. For now."

"He can fly again?" Ironhide took a step closer to let Trailbreaker pass in the hallway. The black mech ventured a friendly wave, which Ironhide returned and First Aid didn't notice.

First Aid nodded and rubbed at his faceplate, drumming with his fingers over the area where a mouth would be. He didn't look up. "We put his flight systems back in right before we released him, figured as long as he was still in the Med Bay..." First Aid cocked his head and glanced at Ironhide. "You'll need to disable the ignition lock on his thrusters. I'll send you the overrides."

"Uh,huh." Ironhide scrutinized the other Autobot. "You look kinda drained Aid, you feelin' alright?" The only part of the Autobot Doctor that didn't look exhausted was the mech's fingers which danced over the datapad's keys tirelessly.

"Oh? I could say the same thing about you." First Aid mumbled good-naturedly at his datapad. "I'll be fine. I've been short on rest the last couple weeks, obviously. Then I got called out by the Protectobots earlier today, right after my shift. But Ratchet is watching Crasher right now, so I should be able to get a few hours recharge." Aid straightened up in the doorway. "Just as soon as I finish these calculations."

"How're the Protectobots holding up without ya?"

"It's really rather amazing what a sixty-five-foot tall giant can do with only one arm." First Aid laughed. "But today they needed me; rock fall had trapped some open-pit miners." First Aid paused his work, thinking, "It was nice to be with the team again, if only for a few hours. I've been so busy. It's not till the end of the day that I realize how much of it I've spent missing them in one way or another."

Ironhide nodded, understanding more than the other mech knew.

First Aid perked up, "We'll be attempting to take Crasher off some of the support machines soon, maybe even by the end of the day. She's already mostly off external current. As long as she stays stable we'll try turning off the secondary radiator, see if she can maintain a constant core temperature." First Aid was talking to his work again, running the same equation for the tenth time to make sure he'd gotten it right.

Ironhide glanced at his own datapad while internally checking his chronometer. "Well, good luck with all that, and make sure you get some recharge, 'kay Aid? I'll probably bring the kid back ta Med Bay to visit a little later today."

"Hmmm? Oh, yes, please do." First Aid mumbled as he wandered into his quarters, still running equations.

Ironhide started down the hall, thumbing through his datapad, ignoring most the mechs he passed. He scrolled down the checklist, marking off the bureaucratic hoops he'd dutifully searched out and jumped through. _Prowl, Prime, Prowl again, Grapple, Beachcomber, and now Aid._ Tracking down Aid had taken the most time, but now that Frenzy had medical clearance there was nothing left to do but pick up the kid and take him to the jobsite.

A quiet, but insistent, ping hummed to life right beneath Ironhide's audio receptors, reminding the mech that he hadn't fueled up yet that day. Mumbling to himself about 'faulty wiring' and 'corroded chips' in his fuel gauge, Ironhide took a detour to the fill-up; finally noticing the dry, empty, ache in his tanks and the whine of a hungry engine. _No wonder I been slippin' gears all day. Dang schedule's gotten all mixed up...an' I wonder if I'm ever gonna get it back..._

A cube of energon later in the corner of the fill-up, Ironhide was gathering thoughts, test driving through some hazards he thought he could see up ahead. Thus far-from that first day in the brig when he'd stayed a hair longer than he needed to- he'd been taking every turn in the road as it came, trusting his core impulses to point out the right way. But each turn, even the right turns, had taken him farther and farther from anything he recognized. It was time to get the lay of the land again, so to speak, try to find some kind of map. Or Primus forbid, he might have to _ask directions_.

Rolling on without a map was what Ironhide always did when the road got rough; and it had served him well in his long lifetime. It kept him flexible, creative. But most important, it kept him focused on guiding points that never wavered. Things too simple and basic to be called ideals, because they were the very nuts and bolts of Ironhide's core.

To follow his core he was willing to crack his world into pieces, break out of one life without clinging to his surroundings and walk blind into a whole new dimension. And this time he'd really done it. Primus, how he'd done it. Practically overnight Ironhide had a half-grown, half-crazy, entirely confused Decepticon outcast glowering in his shadow and a sick sparkling on his mind; and—following blindly- Ironhide had signed the documents legally binding himself to them as guardian for the foreseeable future.

He'd been riding blind for the past couple months, but now Ironhide was making an effort to take things slower so he could see what was coming up ahead. Because now there was someone—some_ones_- in the passenger seat. The first committee meeting was locked on repeat in Ironhide's processor. His data banks had developed a dozen unhappy endings with the material. _I gotta do this right. The kid's just about run outta second chances._

Frowning as he sucked down the last of the energon, Ironhide flipped one last time through his datapad, scanning the particulars of Frenzy's first assignment. _Well, at least he'll be doin' something he's good at,_ Ironhide mused. _Maybe that'll help settle him down..._

XXXXX

The last time Frenzy had been this close to lava his roasting sensors barely registered it though an inferno of charred tactile circuitry as Soundwave clawed himself from the molten river with white-hot hands. Different lifetime, but still, Frenzy was relieved that this time the glowing lake was way over on the other side of the cavern from where they were surveying.

The sulfurous tang that Frenzy noticed when he'd first arrived at Autobot HQ had morphed into a circulating cauldron of leaden, metallic reeking air. And his fans were spinning like mad sucking the nauseating stuff through his radiator to keep his systems from overheating. Light Emitting Diodes ensconced in the walls cast wells of sterile light every few feet in the sweltering cavern. Low-hanging stalactites, and stalagmites caught in the lightpools threw dramatic, serrated shadows across the floors.

And the cavern was big, even by Transformer standards. Devastator could have stood up comfortably. In fact, according to what Frenzy was only half listening to, it was the Constructicons that had first drilled into this particular cavern in the volcano.

"So, I hadn't wanted to damage any delicate rock formations, and I had just been using sonadar pulses to check things out in here. But after an entrance had already been made..." the blue and white geologist 'Bot raised his hands and spun around dramatically in the volcanic cave. "Isn't it amazing, all this mind-blowing...like, geology, just sitting right under our microprocessors." Beachcomber smiled blissfully and laid one of his hands micrometers above a wire's-breadth gap between a spindly stalactite and its squat stalagmite kin, reverentially refusing to disturb the warm damp rock, lest he interfere with even a single grain slowly calcifying to its surface.

The tall red Autobot behind Frenzy voiced exactly what Frenzy was feeling, " Uh huh, very nice, so what the Pit are we supposed to be doing here?" Sideswipe paced through his inspection. The need for superiority above Frenzy keeping him from stooping so low as to fidget.

Beachcomber regarded the almost-column with longing that was painful to notice. Luckily neither Frenzy nor any of his compatriots noticed. After it became apparent that Beachcomber was lost again in his own world, the squat mech next to him sighed and deigned to talk, though his every word seemed as grudgingly given as slag squeezed from a squealing lump.

"We have to dig a new Geothermal Powerplant in here." Huffer winced at his own words, as if their painful worthlessness was painfully apparent, "Autobots are relying too much on begging _human_ energy. We know they're gonna take it away, they already argue about it all the time. It can't last forever like this war can. And we're stuck in this rock. Digging in new chambers all the time. It strains the Ark's grid. One station isn't going to cut it, Pit...two won't. Not two stations put in like _this_." Huffer awkwardly folded his barrel-shaped arms over his chest and frowned at the lava. "If you ask me, we need to blast the cavern twice as deep and put in twice as many generators, but nobody ever asked me what we _needed_. They only wanna ask me how to build what they _want_." The square protective casing around the engineer's head blocked everyone from his peripheral vision. He couldn't see if they were listening or not. He knew that they weren't. He was right.

Beachcomber sighed, "This cave is a speleothermic wonderland. Heat, humidity, igneous rock mixing with sedimentary making each of these unique formations; a core of lava slowly dripping and hardening, melting and remelting over millions of years. Caves eaten in when the volcano erupted, and then these forming as the lava drained back into the earth and the cavern cooled. Lavacicles...rock that once pooled and glowed and flowed at hundreds of thousands of degrees. And these...these covered over with a fine coating of calcified formations. Look at these soda straws...one twitch could snap off what took a hundred thousand years to grow."

The mini-bot's voice was gentle and sad, completely relaxed and resigned, delivering a heartfelt eulogy nonetheless. "We wanted the generators to disturb this as little as possible. Grapple's helped design special places for the turbines to go in...Still..." The geologist bowed his head. "Some demolitions are gonna be required. The floor needs leveled...and some of these...these...miracles of minerals...are going to have to be destroyed."

"I assume that's where we're supposed to come in?" Brawn rumbled, a little impatiently. "You wanted a demolitions expert, you got it. But what are these two doing here?" He waved his hand at Sideswipe and Frenzy. "I don't need a crew to blast a few rocks."

Sideswipe retracted one hand and replaced it with a narrow grey piledriver. "You think these are just for breakin' heads?" He sniffed. "I could smash myself a whole new cavern in the time it took you guys to talk about it."

Huffer waved his hands nervously in front of himself, "Now don't go getting too excited! Beachcomber and I haven't had time to do a thorough geological survey for fault lines in the rocks here. One whack in the wrong place and we could cave in the cavern or trigger a seismic event or open up a fault line on the floor or jumpstart an eruption or—"

"Okay okay I get it." Brawn muttered. "Still don't need a crew for it."

"Then go," The stocky engineer huffed, "Walk it up the chain of command if ya wanna dismiss em, I don't have authorization to. I'm working under Grapple here, complain to him enough—if you can stand to- I suppose he'll send you to Wheeljack. Wheeljack'll either give ya the runaround or take you to Prowl. Prowl might explain why you have a crew, but he won't dismiss 'em. But you keep it up, he might even take ya to Prime. And Prime'll not even know what's goin' down in the first place."

"No need to get snippy." Brawn snipped. Huffer only sighed and nudged Beachcomber into continuing their tour of the cave.

Frenzy felt ignored. It was the most comfortable he'd been all afternoon. No Ironhide, and no Bumblebee meant that Frenzy was mostly left without a friendly face. Beachcomber had acted pleasant enough to Frenzy when his helm wasn't stuck firmly up his afterburners, but the reactions from the other bots, Huffer, Sideswipe, and especially Brawn had been cooler, tinted with suspicion. Frenzy wouldn't really have minded if they'd come right out and attacked him, verbal or otherwise, but instead they tiptoed around him, gauging every reaction. Keeping him on edge, but unable to act. Sideswipe stared at him every time Frenzy dared make so much as a peep, and Brawn sized him up every few minutes, trying to guess his strength.

Frenzy tried to keep his guard up, but the heat and the smell, kept him off balance. That, and every few minutes his train of thought would go ramming into Crasher again, reminding him over and over with a niggling anxiety that she existed and was most certainly _not here_.

Sideswipe paced around the cavern, past Beachcomber who was waxing eloquent over a particular patch of floe stone that would have to be pulverized. He sized up the space, and then interrupted.

"Okay, so when do we get started?" He smiled apologetically, "Not that I don't find this fascinating, but I've got places to be."

Beachcomber shrugged, scanning the floe stone for what may have been the last time. "Well, I'm done with my scans, okay. So I guess you wanna ask Huffer if you wanna know."

Huffer glanced around the cavern, over at the lava, and then at his work crew. "I've scanned this place three times, and as far as my sensors can tell, there's only a couple weak points that, of course, if my scanners were _wrong_—

"Yeah, yeah, we're all in deadly peril." Brawn put his hands on his hips. "Give us a time frame, Huffer. I don't wanna be running this crew any longer than I have to!"

"We can start demo day after tomorrow, at the earliest." Huffer bleated. "And there's probably two, three weeks of work in this. _If_ you can all work together."

Sideswipe had stopped right behind Frenzy, so he could hear the tall warrior mutter, almost inaudibly, "I don't like workin' with murderers."

"What was that?" Brawn barked.

Sideswipe smiled, "I said let's get this started, finished, and over with! I didn't join this outfit to clear rubble." He looked pointedly at Frenzy. "I joined to bust Deceptichops."

_So that's how it's gonna be, huh_? Frenzy had to wrestle down the sudden, overpowering, urge for battle. _Primus, I ain't kicked tail in so long..._ His arms were practically itching to pound into some warm living Autobot. His spark pulsed faster, revving up, producing a little extra jolt to go through his small frame, giving him the power boost that made Frenzy such a terrifying fighter, for at least the first few minutes. _Gotta see Crash later, can't get stuck in brig..._his processor whined at him through the battle fog.

Beachcomber patted Frenzy gently on the back, causing a reflexive twitch that he ignored. "Hey man," he scolded Sideswipe, "No need to get so hostile, ya know. We're all friendly here. It's nice to have something to do other than fighting, isn't it? We're building something up for a change. And we're gonna work together doin' it." He smiled serenely while Sideswipe shrugged the tension away, an easy grin playing on the warrior's faceplates.

"Sure thing Beachcomber." He clapped Brawn fraternally on the back. "We're all on the same side here aren't we?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Frenzy couldn't deny to himself that he felt more than a little relieved to be getting back to the Med Bay. Staying away had been like denying a force of gravity. And now all he wanted to do was see his kid, and then get some recharge.

It came as a complete shock when the Med Bay doors wouldn't open for Ironhide's request. He tried the call button a couple times, finally the door opened and Wheeljack poked his head out. The Autobot engineer's faceplates were inscrutable. His head fins flickered like some ghastly lightshow when he motioned Ironhide nearer and muttered something that Frenzy, at a completely different altitude, couldn't make out. Ironhide visibly stiffened. The door shut and Ironhide shuffled the few steps over to frenzy, The Mini-Cassette's spark turned to ice when Ironhide hunched down, making them at eye level. A pensive frown on his guardian's face frightened Frenzy into shutting down his responses, one by one. _Oh shit. Oh Primus, no._

"Kid, there's, uh, There's been a problem. Crasher isn't...isn't really doing too good right now."

"Can I see her?" Life was threatening to freeze up around him and leave him petrified, so he pressed on ahead.

"Kid, Frenzy, Wheeljack said...said he would contact us..."

"How bad?" The scenario was obviously continuing, despite Frenzy's hope that at any second he would snap out of the horrible prank Primus was playing on him.

"Wheeljack said they're all workin' on her right now."

"Is she gonna die?"

I...he...he didn't give me any odds."

"Can I see her?" Frenzy's voice was flat. There were no thoughts racing, only wordless panic. Every emotion was an opponent to attack with even more fury.

"She's in surgery now. Wheejack says they're doing everything they can."

"Can I _see_ her?" Frenzy's voice was insistent, desperate. _Frag, I've, I've got to see her._ As if the very act of viewing her would keep her spark inside her laser core.

"I'm sorry kid. She's in surgery; you can't"

"Then what am I supposed to do?" An anger born of fear pressed his words closer to a shout. Useless as always. Useless sawed-off little scraps.

Ironhide hung his head till his face was masked in shadow. "I...kid...I..." _Hell, what was he supposed to do?_ "There's nothing we can do right now, we're just gonna have to wait."

Frenzy growled and paced over to the door to the Med Bay. He stared at it, fairly shaking with rage. Then abruptly he tore himself away and stormed off down the hall.

"Hey, where' ya goin'?" Ironhide called after him.

Frenzy stopped in the hall and turned. His fists clenching and unclenching, his head staring at a spot on the floor ahead of him. "I'm goin' back to my room." he muttered. "I'm tired."

Ironhide nodded, and followed after. "Yeah, that's a good idea. Get some rest. I'll let you know if anything changes."

Frenzy didn't hear this as he stomped down the hall. Taking turns faster and faster till he was nearly running. Just get back, get back, get back and shut down.

The second Frenzy was in his room he scrambled onto his berth and curled as far in the corner as he could get. He wrapped his arms tight over his head, and drew his knees up tight to his chest. _God, if he could only fold up. Become tiny. God. Wasn't there any way to shut it down? _The gnawing panic, making it impossible to think.

After barely a minute of curled stillness Frenzy flopped over restlessly. The lights in the little brown room were still on. The blue corner, everything in it, horrifically visible. Frenzy ran over to the panel by the door and slapped the lights off. Then he stumbled blindly back over to the berth, curling up much as he had before.

He wasn't lost any more. Frenzy knew just how many feet, how many inches, how many microns he was away from the Med Bay. His battle computer, revved up for a fight by the force of panic, had calculated the approximate location of Crasher in said Med Bay, how long it would take Frenzy to get there, flying or walking. How much pressure he would have to exert to break down the doors.

How many milliliters of energon were in her lines, how many volts her processor worked at, the very temperature of her heart. Somehow he had gathered this information unawares and now in his panic he was pouring over it, as if somehow _he_ would be able to save her with it.

Nothing but a sawed-off little scrap that won't never do no good for nobody.

Beautiful.

If he had a thousand years Frenzy never would be able to articulate what Crasher was. He lacked the vocabulary of tenderness, the words of love; spark twisting, solid, like a punch to the face. The world hadn't even gotten used to the idea of her yet, and a week of staring at the little, Megatron-colored thing couldn't have prepared him for the idea that in a moment it could be gone.

_This_ very moment, she could be gone. The world could be creeping on without her and Frenzy wouldn't even know. And he didn't even know what she was. Something that was his. His whole slagging universe. A block of metal, less than two feet long, that he'd held a couple times while it screamed at him. A nightmare's echo. Megatron too close. A living, pulsing memory of secrets whispered in the dark. Megatron fucking him over for the rest of his goddamn life.

Beautiful. Primus, she had been so beautiful.

Frenzy's arms were aching. His sensors knew where she was, where she had been. _Primus, no, don't, you can't. Fuck._ He'd lost the words to pray with. This time wasn't _his_ fault. Frenzy thought he'd been doing everything right this week. And then _this_ had happened without any reason. _Primus don't._ He felt completely alone. There was nothing, no one, close by. No Rumble, no Soundwave, no Crasher, no Primus. No one with him but himself, a person he hardly knew and couldn't depend on.

It might have been only minutes later. Or it could have been hours. When Frenzy heard a tapping at his door. He ignored it. _No. Fuck. Just go._

He curled up so tight he felt the welds on his chest ache in protest. The desire to transform, to hide, was overwhelming, a panicked instinct that couldn't be satisfied. In desperation he tried it, and every joint squealed and shuddered in protest, burning, but Frenzy stayed the same.

Tapping again. And the door opened, a dagger of orange light stabbed into Frenzy's room.

"Hey, Frenzy" Ironhide's voice was low.

He stepped into the room and turned on the light. Frenzy stiffened as if he were dead too. Ironhide stared for a second at a loss.

"Frenzy?" Ironhide asked, "You okay kid?"

"Is she dead?"

"I—I haven't heard anything yet."

A pause, then, "I'm tired, leave me alone."

"Frenzy?"

"Leave. Me. Alone" The fury was beneath the words, pressing each one tightly, and warning of the explosion that one more prod would bring.

Ironhide moved to leave. "You know where to find me kid." he quickly muttered as the door opened. "You know that I'm here." Then the big red mech was gone.

Frenzy lay in the dark, calculating distance, for as long as he was able.

XXXXXXXX

Ironhide was doing security rounds, because standing still wasn't really an option. He was more of a pacing mech.

Ironhide wasn't surprised at the black and red lump, pressed into a tight ball, sitting in the hallway right outside Med Bay. The black helm hung down, visor glinting red unseeingly; the mech was motionless, exhausted, but awake. Ironhide took a seat next to the young mech, settling down as quietly as he could. He tried not to think of just a week ago, when he'd been holding this vigil for both of them. _Outta second chances? Primus, you wouldn't._

He felt something rest on his knee, and he looked down. Frenzy, still tightly curled, was leaning against him. The optic visor stared straight ahead, the tension with the exhaustion was making the small mech's entire frame tremble. And that frame curled up next to him, in his shadow. Ironhide put one huge black hand over the mini-cassette's back, over his shoulders, and left it there till he felt Frenzy's trembling stop. Ironhide wondered if the mech had drifted off, when a dead little voice muttered into his side.

"Do you...do you Autobots pray?"

"Most, yeah."

"A lot?"

Ironhide's hand cupped Frenzy's shoulders a little tighter. "Lately, kid, I've been praying all the time."

"Do it for me then. I don't know how."

XXXXXXXXXXX

The large viewport in Megatron's quarters didn't offer much of a view anymore. He stared through it nonetheless, trying once more not to get lost in thought. The datapads strewed across his desk lay neglected. Megatron despised the tedious paperwork necessary in leading a war. He was a mech of actions, not of contemplation. Brooding only offered a chance to second guess himself; something that Megatron couldn't afford to do. Not now, not ever. If he doubted his actions he invited damnation to haunt him.

Megatron was aware of the other mech entering the room, even without turning around. The stale air in the undersea headquarters always seemed extra charged when Soundwave was near. The imposing, inscrutable mech had such _presence_. A forbidding combination of a specter and a colossus.

"Is it done then?" Megatron asked.

"Laserbeak returned. Outcome: Uncertain."

Megatron whirled around in his swiveled chair, stood, and strode over to his Communications Officer. "Well, when _will_ we be certain? I wanted this dealt with immediately! I want it done! Finished!"

Soundwave nodded, and bowed his head in acquiescence, "Lazerbeak informs _it_ was very weak, sabotage thorough, will send on reconnaissance tomorrow to confirm termination."

"Good." Megatron barked, "Waiting a week has sorely tried my patience." The Decepticon Leader inched right up so he was optic to visor with Soundwave. His voice was a raspy hiss, "You may be generous enough to allow your energy signature to be diluted and stamped onto microsized puppets, only fit to be the minions of minions, but I am not. I am Megatron. I crush worlds and incinerate systems. I will not allow myself to be reflected onto an inferior plane. Each pulse of that bastard spark makes me a fool."

Then Megatron erupted. Like he always did, with little buildup. His fury spewed hate from the unstable fires always inside himself, gnashing, spitting, hot, like a smoldering engine grinding itself to bits. He paced over to his desk, fists clenched, growling wordlessly. The inferno was always there, always consuming, ready to explode. Soundwave didn't flinch though. He stood, taking the entire tirade calmly, accepting it uncowed.

"And those Autobots! Hovering and fluttering around it like Primus's slaggin' angels." Megatron gripped the back of his throne-like chair till it dented beneath his fingers. "I'm sure it warms your little spark Optimus," The grey mech fumed to himself, "Opening your home to my poor, crippled, mini-offspring. A chance to show just how _kind_!" Megatron pummeled the desk in front of him, "Just how _magnanimous_!" Another punch, "Just how damned _enlightened_ you are."

Megatron turned to Soundwave, optics burning, but also pleading. "Don't you see, Soundwave? Whether it lives or dies he'll try and use it against me! It dies a martyr. It lives a symbol of their superiority! He'll try to use it to turn my armies against me! Claim it as my heir, as if any would respect the claim! He'll use it to win sympathy from those disgusting earth germs. He'll raise it up against me, my offspring as their weak slave!"

"Hypothetical outcome unlikely." Soundwave gently reminded. Still unmoved. It was a suggestion rather than an argument. "It is insignificant, to anyone."

Megatron slumped in his throne, and gripped the ridge between his optics. He seemed to be wrestling with himself for a moment. He swiveled on his throne, looking out the viewport at the ocean. The lights hardly penetrated the sea water for more than a few dozen feet. Beyond was a fluid wall of inky black. Even the sea-life had learned to stay away. The view was twice as barren as space, darkness pressing in without a star.

There was a flash of something strange behind Megatron's optics, and reflected in the viewpane Soundwave could see Megatron relax, slump really. But when the imperious grey mech saw his own somber reflection against the black the fury erupted again in full force. He slammed his fist down on the armrest with a hollow gavel-like bang, turning to face his Communications Officer. "It is a mercy to kill it! A Decepticon that weak isn't worthy of the name, and is hardly worthy of me."

Soundwave inclined his head. "Agreed." The deep blue tape deck took a few confident steps closer to Megatron, making his presence felt once more. "But subject is terminated, Autobot opinion irrelevant. Will continue with next phase of operation, pending authorization."

Megatron's optics narrowed. His whole demeanor soured. "Really Soundwave? Still? Such...persistence." Megatron smiled humorlessly, still slumped in his throne. "I didn't expect such, paternal constancy from you. I'm sure the others wouldn't recognize it." The smile dropped away. "It isn't at all becoming."

Soundwave was silent. It served as all the reply Megatron needed to snap again. "Not at all becoming that you should plead for a _traitor_!" Gripping the arms of his throne Megatron leaned forward. "A defiant, mutinous, ungrateful, whiny, little glitch! Who willfully disobeyed my direct order, who spoke out against me in front of two superior officers! Who accepted shelter and aid from _Autobots_! Who tried to force me to accept, to acknowledge, that...that...thing!"

Soundwave was still silent, but his head bowed incrementally.

"He is a traitor, Soundwave." Megatron growled, "Traitors must die."

Soundwave bowed his head all the way, letting his guard down with complete calculated control, developed through millions of years of manipulation. Though he still stood strong, he let his resignation show. "Traitors must be punished," he agreed. "Frenzy shames me. His actions are inexcusable. He deserves termination. Should be terminated."

Megatron snorted, relaxing into his displeasure. "Then why the fight to retrieve him? Let's have it done with! Death the second he shows his face outside that blasted Autobot Headquarters. Or send one of your pets in to finish him too! Just get it done quickly." Megatron spun around in the chair again to face the viewport and his desk, ending the conversation. But Soundwave did not leave; instead he took the last few steps between himself and the back of Megatron's chair.

Megatron tensed preparing for another clipped monotone argument. Instead he felt expert hands press lightly into the tight bundles of cables at the back of his neck, probing expertly, clinically, at the sensitive wiring; relaxing cramped micro-linkages and auto-resetting tactile sensors. Megatron was tempted to swat his underlings hands away, accuse Soundwave of using the basest means possible to attempt to change Megatron's mind. But he knew that Soundwave would not outright disobey him. If Megatron commanded, Soundwave did, without complaint. He never disputed orders like others. He came to Megatron with reasonable, often private suggestions. _Why couldn't all his warriors be more like Soundwave?_

So Megatron allowed Soundwave's ministrations. Enjoying it with the smug satisfaction that nothing Soundwave would say could change his mind. _Traitors, especially this traitor, deserve to die. Nothing you say can change that Soundwave._

"If he dies, he dies a martyr." Soundwave said, hands still at work. "For the Autobots."

Megatron froze beneath Soundwave's palms. He hadn't considered this wrinkle.

"He deserves termination." Soundwave repeated. "Traitors must be punished. But he dies a martyr."

Soundwave's hands dipped between two lines expertly, tweaking a neural line that sent a calm relaxed feeling right to Megatron's core processor. Calming the fire, if only for a moment. "If retrieved, punished, and made to serve again, we hurt Optimus Prime. Optimus wishes to save him, make him Autobot." Megatron frowned thoughtfully. He knew Optimus and he knew that Frenzy's defection must have caused his mortal enemy endless joy. "We terminate him, we terminate an Autobot. They mourn awhile. We retrieve him as a Decepticon, and he fights Autobots who offered assistance. Kills Autobots who aided him. They mourn for all time."

Rarely over the eons Megatron would catch a glimpse in Soundwave of something other than the Decepticon cause; distilled and personified into an intelligent, deadly, tool. Most of the time when Megatron looked at Soundwave he saw his army, his soldiers as he would always have them be: clever, powerful, but above all loyal. Megatron had few soldiers whose loyalties were unquestioned, and fewer effective enough to depend on as wholly as Megatron unconsciously leaned on Soundwave. He knew that Soundwave would never suggest anything not in the best interests of the Decepticon cause, and by extension Megatron himself. He gave everything he was to Megatron, not holding back even himself, not even his Cassetticons. Not even his sons.

And hurting Optimus again and again, for all time, that was the stuff Megatron's dreams were made of. Surely he could be magnanimous for once, be merciful one time, if it meant hurting the fleshy-loving Prime like _that_. And his own soldiers would be impressed by his forgiveness. Soundwave pressed against another tense cable and Megatron felt a rush of warmth spread up and down his neural bundle. He smiled a dark, twisted smile. Yes, they would be astounded at his mercy.

And, yet, terrified at Frenzy's punishment nonetheless. Megatron reached up to his shoulder and gripped Soundwave's hand tightly, crushing the fingers beneath his vise-like grasp while standing and pulling the tall blue mech till they were optic visor to optic sensor once again. Megatron hissed. "You make a convincing argument. But know this: sparing Frenzy from a death sentence does not preserve him from the punishment coming his way. Traitors _must_ be punished," Megatron growled. The twisted smile returned, "Spare the mace, spoil the Sub-Adult."

Soundwave put his free hand on Megatron's shoulder and nodded, "Agreed. Frenzy must be punished. Severely."

Megatron smiled, too long he'd been brooding, thinking, sitting alone in the dark places, without a distraction, tossing through uneasy recharge cycles. _Why hadn't he just left it up to Soundwave?_ Soundwave was intelligent, skilled, in so many different areas. Too much thinking, too much work, too much worry. Now for some amusement.

Megatron didn't let go of Soundwave's cramped hand, didn't brush the other hand off his shoulder. He just pulled the tall blue mech closer, his free hand cupped possessively behind his subordinate's neck. Soundwave complied without hesitation.

A/N: In the year 1970 there convened The Grand Council of Fanfiction writers. Writers from 'zines across the country came together, after years of battle, to sign the treaty of Sue-Fanwank. Male and female writers, who had been a bloody stalemate for years, set out the guidelines that all fanfiction writers would follow. As a provision of the treaty all slash scenes must be signified by the inclusion of the word 'ministrations.'


	28. Chapter 28

The room was dim. The only light came from the glimmering monitor of a computer terminal highlighting and casting shadows on the tired old mech's face. Ironhide leaned forward, so his low voice could be picked up by the new computer's speaker. "What was I supposed to do? Leave him sleeping in the hall? Take him back to his room so he could wake up alone? And the kid was out like a light. His systems shut down hard, don't know how long it's been since he got good rest like that."

There was no image on the screen. Auditory transmissions were hard enough to send, and Ironhide didn't want to have to justify the bandwidth. But his processor had no trouble picturing the blue femme anyway, picturing the worried quirk on her faceplates as she spoke. "But when he wakes up, aren't you...aren't you at all concerned how he's going to take it? After what..."

Ironhide cut her off with a sigh. "Yeah, I'm concerned. Dammit. But what was I supposed to do? He's just gonna have to learn that it's not like that." He leaned back and rubbed his optics wearily.

"Ironhide, recharge." The voice from the speaker commanded.

"Can't sleep. Watin' fer a message."

"What message? What good can you do for Crasher now? The message can wait, rest."

"I didn' say they were _connected_. Primus, you think I can _recharge_? They're workin' on her right now, practically jus' down the hall."

"Ironhide." It was an embrace by way of his name. The old mech leaned closer to the terminal instinctively, as if being closer to the speaker would make her nearer. "How's Frenzy?"

"There's nothin' I can do.."

"That's not what I asked. How's Frenzy acting?" Chromia's voice had taken a stern edge. "So much of this I'm getting through the switchboard. _You_ tell me how Frenzy is. You tell me how Frenzy is with you."

"Right, an once I tell you this, you'll go tell Elita, who'll go tell Optimus. And Optimus'll let me know..."

"Ironhide." A reprimand. "You mute the speakers on your mind, doesn't mean everybot else has got to. Don't... I mean...shouldn't I know? Don't you want me to know about how Frenzy is? Isn't that why you got this computer installed?"

Ironhide waved her off, forgetting she couldn't see him. "Yeah, yeah. I know. I just, I'm..." He hunched over and rubbed his hands together thoughtfully. "She's...she's just down the hall, ya know?"

"Have you heard..."

"Nothin' But, Primus, Chromia, she's tiny. And...an' it wouldn't take much..."

Silence from the other end, then, "How will Frenzy take it?"

"I don' know. Every time I think I've almost got a handle on the kid, somethin' happens. He's a murderer, he's a smart mouthed little punk, and he's wild as a loose fan blade. But I bet he's a lot older, an' a lot younger, than most of us are givin' 'im credit for. An' Crasher, she's _his_, an' he knows it." Ironhide scratched the corner of the speaker, hunching in deeper. "This'll break him." He finally added.

"And you?"

Ironhide sat, rubbing his optics in the dark, and didn't answer the question.

"Ironhide?" Her voice, and he could see her in his mind's eye. Primus...he hadn't wanted her close this bad in years, decades.

"Whad'am I supp'ost ta say ta 'im, Chromia?" Exhaustion or emotion was making his vocal tics more pronounced, "Whad'am I supp'ost ta do? I look at 'im, an' I swear I can see my own processor at work, I look at 'im and...I donno...I jus' gotta be there, but that isn' gonna fix et. He should 'ave someone like Optimus doin' this. Someone who knows. All I can teach 'im is the right way ta punch walls."

"He trusts you."

"I don't know about that."

"Fine, but think of one other Bot there that he's gonna trust _more_." Ironhide grunted. "He needs you. He's gotten this far, you damn well better fight to see him the rest of the way." Her firm voice dropped, "No matter what, Ironhide."

"Wish you were here." He mumbled into his chest.

"I know," her voice was lead, "but if wishes were jetpacks..." she stopped herself, then softer, "Ironhide, I mean, I wish that too."

"Gotta get my processor offa this. How are things on—Wait an astrosec." Ironhide turned toward his berth, where a rustling and the low whirr of cooling fans let him know Frenzy was coming back online. "Kid's wakin' up gotta—"

"Wait, Ironhide, please, can I just talk to him for a moment?"

"Hang on," Ironhide muttered.

Frenzy's optic band flickered and came online. It took the Mini-Cassette a second to register where he was, or rather where he wasn't. He sat up slowly. Ironhide stayed at the computer a safe distance across the room, and pushed a button on his new terminal to raise the lights. Frenzy didn't waste any time getting off the berth, but stood awkwardly in the middle of the room, arms crossed and scowling to himself.

"You fell asleep in the hall kid, couldn't leave you there."

"Fire hazard?" Frenzy mumbled and scratched his helm. He froze, his face tight with revulsion. After a moment he rubbed his shaking hands over his visor once, twice, three times, then shook his arms out as if doing nothing more than shaking the volts back into his motor functions. "News?" He asked in a tiny voice.

"Nothing yet. You've been out five, six hours. But I haven't gotten any news."

"Ironhide?" The voice from the speaker tentatively asked.

Frenzy scowled again. "Who's that? I interrupting somethin'?"

Ironhide looked from speaker to Mini-Cassette, at a loss. "Ahhh..."

A long-suffering sigh from the speaker. "Frenzy?"

"Present and accounted for," Frenzy snipped, remembering murmurs of what had woken him. Voices from the past, but not all of them unpleasant. Nothing to put him in a better mood though.

"Do you know who I am?"

"Nope." Frenzy was preoccupied, and inclined to be surly, but something in the tone of her voice kept him from giving full reign to his frustration.

"My name's Chromia. I'm a friend of Ironhide's"

Frenzy glanced over at the old Autobot who gave Frenzy a look of stern warning, as if to say be on your best behavior.

"You blue?" Frenzy asked, recalling a conversation from weeks earlier.

"Yes...why?"

"Just checkin'," Frenzy felt an inkling of curiosity stab through his numbing anxiety over Crasher. "You one of the fembots holed up on Cybertron? Rumble tol' me about you."

"Yes Frenzy, I'm 'holed up' on Cybertron." The wry emotion behind the voice made Ironhide shake his head and sigh.

"Hmph." Frenzy took a few steps closer to the terminal. There was something about the tone of the femme's voice. He hadn't talked to a femme, a real femme, in...a very long time. His already error ridden memory jumped and hitched a few times over forgotten fragments of the past. But Crasher was the first femme he'd seen in the alloy for recorded, catalogued memory.

"I realize this is a bad time Frenzy," Just like every other Autobot, Chromia was being as obnoxiously cautious as possible, but at least she was better at being blunt. "But I didn't know if Ironhide was going to give me another chance."

"Go ahead with it." Frenzy mumbled. He didn't know if it was the gnawing concern, or if he was just being shy, but he was reluctant to speak actual words to this disembodied femme voice.

"Ironhide is a friend of mine, a close friend."

"Right." Rumble would have sneered, but the ghosts of similar voices kept Frenzy from jeering at Ironhide's 'friend'.

"So if he gives you too much trouble, you know who to contact, right?" It was an unexpected turn in the conversation, and it almost earned a half smile.

"Call Chromia?" Frenzy answered, fully intending to never take her up on it.

"That's right, Chromia." The strong, female voice affirmed. Then, more seriously, "And Frenzy, he means well." Ironhide shifted with embarrassment. When Frenzy looked at him he shrugged and made a show of rolling his optics. "Gotta go Ironhide, sorry, longer we're on the greater the chance Shockwave will catch this transmission."

"Understood, Chromia." Ironhide replied stiffly, reaching for the computer terminal.

"Keep me posted guys. We're all pullin' for you here." So fuzzy and Autoboty again. Frenzy growled a sigh, and Ironhide shot him a disapproving glare.

"Bye," Frenzy mumbled.

"Bye," Ironhide chorused. And with a hiss and a click, the room somehow lost a little light. Ironhide slipped away getting energon for both of them. And Frenzy was left lingering by the terminal, Chromia's voice echoing again and again in his processor, melding with the faintest impressions he had of echoes from the past. Echoes that told him that losing Crasher would be nothing more than coming full circle.

XXXXX

You can never win. You can only delay defeat. This was the first rule a medic was programmed with. Death wasn't just the enemy, it was the final destination. A medic's only job was to make sure the trip took as long as possible. However valiantly the medics fought, death could wait forever. Moreover every living second a hard-fought battle could go from stalemate to defeat in a blitz of compounding malfunctions.

This was why no one in the Med Bay was celebrating. This is why they were all still diligently working, preparing for things to turn south any astrosecond. But sparkpulse by strengthening sparkpulse, tension was easing out of the room and death seemed further away than it had been a few hours ago.

Perceptor was delicately welding a paper-thin section of plating with a low-heat solder and a wire's width torch. In his exhausted state First Aid could do nothing more than supervise as the scientist carefully pieced together the sparkling's chestplating. On a side table Ratchet was clearing away the bits of kibble that were left over from the manufacture of microsized components to replace Crasher's damaged ones.

Ratchet glanced up at First Aid, who was watching Crasher's lifesigns with sentinel-like intensity. But the experienced medic saw the signals of a mech about to lose the battle with exhaustion. Rather than tell Aid to take a break, which Ratchet knew would be ignored, Ratchet got up, got small cubes of energon for the tired medical team, and passed them out. He handed First Aid his cube last, sitting down beside them, watching as Perceptor used his trademark precision to carefully weld together the chassis that they'd cut into, peeled away, and spent hours disassembling, tweaking, jolting, and prodding back from the brink of total system failure.

First Aid reached forward to minutely fine-tune one of the machines, the external Direct Current. First Aid had been constantly readjusting the delicate balancing act of a dozen overstressed, mechanically supported systems. Ratchet didn't have the programming to work with these micromeasures, but he knew from experience just how important it was to the struggling systems. They didn't have room for error in either direction.

"We had fail-safes..." He protested quietly, "We had circuit breakers and surge protectors and alarms for every major mechanical, cydralic, fuel or electric system."

"They're looking into it," Ratchet mumbled into his cube. After today he was gonna need more than recharge, he was gonna need a full on defrag for his primary, secondary, and meta processors. Hell, he'd probably reinstall his operating system to boot. Anything to cut post-op jitters. Warriors he could work on, save or lose; they were his equals. This had reminded him too much of the bad old days when the war first went to hell and too many innocents caught in the crossfire piled up for desperate triage, and far too many little sparks winked out under his hands.

"But to have the support machines feedback like that...and no warning alarm at all. It was almost too late." First Aid put the cube down without touching it, and leaned in to double check the energon, hydralic, and especially electric lines plugged into various artificial ports on Crasher's motionless body.

"Ever have anything similar? Back on Cybertron or with the refugees?"

First Aid sat back; thoughtful. "I've had pre-term multi-system failures before. Minis, and those who didn't know, or couldn't get maintenance, especially midway through. In the war there were accidents that got overlooked in the chaos. Smaller 'bots who couldn't turn military starving through a carrying. Some sparklings, I was the only one who was fighting for them. Some were saved. But I went to a lot of memorials for little crates where I was the only one in attendance." First Aid gestured around the room full of Autobots, "But I had less equipment, more patients, less resources, back then. Crasher is probably the smallest sparkling I've handled, but she's far from being the most desperate." The Protectobot hung his head shamefaced, "At least, I thought."

Ratchet narrowed his optics. "This may have been out of our hands entirely, Aid." Perceptor finished the last of the welding on the still chassis and was busy cleaning the equipment.

"I must agree with Ratchet's appraisal." The scientist seconded. "A thorough battery of diagnostics is essential antecedent to our burdening ourselves unnecessarily with blame."

First Aid stood and his voice was firm. He spoke so everybot in the Med Bay could hear him. "Listen everyone, whatever the reasons behind these malfunctions, I want someone berthside with Crasher at all times from now on. I want vital scans every fifteen minutes, complete system diagnostics every two hours. I will not let this happen again."

The door the Med Bay beeped, and Ratchet went to the locked entrance and pushed the comm button. "Yeah."

"Look, I know you ain't called," said Ironhide through the intercom, "but kid an' I are goin' nuts and bolts just waiting, so give us a slaggin' update already."

"First Aid." Ratchet gestured to the wall's speaker, "You want to take this."

First Aid conferred at the door for only a moment before keying the Med Bay open. Frenzy was through the door before it was through parting, and he stood looking around, but seeing through all the Autobots. His visor fell on Crasher motionless on the berth and he took two panicked steps closer to her automatically before stopping himself.

Crouching beside him First Aid said in his obnoxiously gentle voice, "Take it easy. She's all there." Frenzy cast his concerned frown on the Autobot doctor. "She hasn't rebooted yet, but she's still there. I think she's going to pull through."

Before First Aid could think Frenzy had attacked the Protectobot's waist in a spontaneous hug. Frenzy pulled away awkwardly, and glared around the room, daring the unfamiliar Autobots to stare. Then he sidled self-consciously to Crasher's side, and shielded mostly from sight slipped his finger under her limp hand.

"Crasher. It's me," he whispered, "I'm here." He pulled back and clambered up onto what had been First Aid's seat. He crossed his arms and watched the monitors, unmovable as a block of steel welded in place. First Aid took a seat next to him, and the exhausted mechs watched Hoist running scanners over the tiny grey and red body.

"What happened?" Ironhide asked Ratchet who was picking up First Aid's forgotten energon.

"Machine malfunctions," Ratchet replied, "Leading to multiple system failures." He handed the cube to Security Officer who downed it gratefully.

"An' what are _they_ doin' here?" Ironhide dug his thumb over at Red Alert, Hound, Prowl and Blaster. Prowl was surveying the ceiling, Hound and Blaster seemed to be running scans, and Red Alert looked determined to examine every micron of every medical machine.

"Did you hear me say malfunctions?" Ratchet glared up at the multiple ventilation ducts on the ceiling. "I built these machines myself. My machines do _not_ malfunction. They're scanning the room, and especially the vents. Hound's covering the infrared tracking, Blaster's on radio waves. Red is, of course, looking for sabotage."

"Sabotage? You think they'd go that far?"

"I don't know, Ironhide, you tell me. Do you think Megatron is just gonna let Frenzy and Crasher drive off into the sunset with us to live happily ever after? My robot points are on one of Soundwave's other lackeys sneaking in here on Megatron's orders. They've got ways around our sensors somehow."

The old Autobot turned toward his charge. Frenzy had stuck his finger under Crasher's motionless hand again. The Minicassette whispered something before glancing over his shoulder to give Red Alert a suspicious glare. He reached out to cup Crasher's helm, but Hoist gently stopped him. Frenzy looked surprised, then frustrated. Ironhide sighed.

"They got guards on the room now?" Ironhide asked, voice low.

"Red Alert has asked to watch." Before Ironhide could even protest, Ratchet continued, "And he's got the most sensitive scanners. If anyone can catch Laserbeak or Ratbat in the act, it's Red, and you know it." Ironhide still seemed unconvinced, so Ratchet added. "And by 'in the act' I mean before they finish what they started this time."

Ironhide nodded. "Keep and optic on him will ya? I've gotta go report ta Optimus. Old mech's brooded enough over the past two months to last an age, no sense letting him get another hour in if he doesn't need ta." He thought he should tell Frenzy he was going, but the kid was too absorbed in watching unconscious metal resting on a table. Ironhide simply muttered a sub-auditory prayer of thanks, and left.

XXXXXX

It was the middle of the night shift at the Autobot Headquarters. Two thirds of the Autobots were on their recharge cycles. Those that were on duty tended to work, watch, or patrol rather quietly, letting the base itself rest.

The Med Bay was quiet now. Most of the medical team had trickled out, though First Aid had shut-down calibrating a spare thermostatic clutch, finally succumbing to exhaustion. He was now resting propped up in the corner. Ratchet was taking the first medical watch sitting on a bench pulled up next to the sparkberth.

Sitting hunched next to him, legs drawn up, arms crossed, chin on arm plates, was Frenzy. The young mech had refused to leave when Ironhide had gone off to recharge. But there were more than enough optics in the room to keep an eye on him. Red Alert was sitting within sensor range of every major vent and duct, his particle beam rifle across his knees, as vigilant now as he had been four hours ago.

Ratchet checked his internal chronometer and stood. He walked over to the spark support machine first, datapad and scanner out.

"Diagnostics again?" Frenzy mumbled. He turned his head so he was resting the side of his helm on his arm. Ratchet grunted an affirmative, and moved on to the external solenoidal adapter.

"How'she?"

"Sparkpulse is constant, but putting out more watts. Pretty soon she'll have enough power going through circuits for her metaprocessor to come back online."

"Then I can hold her?" There was a flicker of frustration in Frenzy's voice.

"Maybe. If you're careful, and she's up to it."

"Slaggin' peachy," Frenzy grumbled, banging his visor against his arm. "A real strong Decepticon sparkling, huh?" His voice dripped sarcasm.

Ratchet frowned, and paused mid-diagnostic. "You're disappointed with her?"

Frenzy shrugged, "Wouldn't you be?" He picked at his plating self-consciously. "It's like she's made of fraggin' glass or something."

"Comes with the small frame." Ratchet explained tersely. "_Your_ small frame. Add being at least two weeks preterm, on top of you nearly off-lining on the table a week ago. She _should_ be dead." Frenzy reached out reluctantly to touch Crasher's hand. "Would you _want_ that?" Ratchet demanded.

"No," Frenzy spat, but pulled his hand back with embarrassment. He curled up again, pouting. "But why isn't she?" He tightened in against the too confusing world. "Why is she here?"

Ratchet softened brushing away his futile attempts to understand or anticipate Frenzy's words. He was never good at regulating his responses to avoid offending others, and he was too tired to try. So with a smile and a prayer he let that filter go completely. "I'm not good at the metaphysical questions. You want to ask things like 'why are we here?' you gotta take it up with Prime, or maybe Beachcomber." Frenzy snorted. "As for _how_ she's here?" Ratchet pointed meaningfully at the mech recharging in the corner. "Do you know how much you owe him? Your life and hers three times over. Ever thought of thanking him?"

Red Alert had been listening to the entire conversation with growing interest. He finally cut in, "Yes, you owe the entire medical team a great debt, Frenzy. They've all volunteered extra hours of work, taken from their free-time, to watch over Crasher. The amount of overtime they've put in these past few weeks is staggering."

Frenzy frowned in annoyance at the sound of Red's voice. "I never asked them to," he muttered, "They shoulda known they wouldn't get anything out of it." He looked to Ratchet, as if for the first time, "Optimus Prime put you up to this? What did you think you were gonna get out of it?"

Ratchet shrugged, "You're right Frenzy, the overtime pay was hardly worth it. Top it off with rewiring all of Teletraan after your little escape fiasco." He bent over Crasher and scanned her, then smiled, "Watts are up again, and her new energon pump is finally kicking into gear." He smiled at the tiny sparkling. "Only thing I can tell you is that Autobots are suckers for sparklings." He looked up. "All of us, that right, Red?"

"Ah. Damn straight." An uncharacteristic smile from the Security Director. "As some humans would say."

"Why are _you_ here anyway?" Frenzy demanded with a sour expression. "Keeping watch on me?"

Red Alert was undaunted. "Only as a secondary objective. My main priority here is to protect your daughter from your former Decepticon allies."

"You think they would try to kill her?"

"Frenzy, we think they tried to kill her this time." Ratchet explained, taking his seat again. "These machine malfunctions were extremely abnormal. Hound and Red believe that someone was tampering with the operating frequencies, transmitting false instructions."

"But...but the only Decepticon that could do that is Laserbeak. Maybe Ratbat, but..." Frenzy shook his head. "No. He wouldn't do that. Rumble would have told them all about the slag from last week. He would know that I wanted to keep her. He wouldn't try and kill her."

"He would if Megatron ordered him to." Red Alert rebutted.

"No. It's _Laserbeak_. He would find some way around it."

"Ratbat then."

"You don't fraggin' understand." Frenzy was agitated now. "They're cassettes. I've known them forever, they're like...like my _brothers_. Don't you get it. They're...well, they're probably mad as slag that I'm over here now, but they wouldn't do _that_. They wouldn't do that to me, no matter what Megatron says."

"What if Soundwave told them to?" Ratchet asked.

Frenzy froze. "No," he said at last, firmly. "Soundwave has an 'in' with Megs. A serious 'in' if you know what I mean. He woulda talked him out of it. He couldn't stand up to him with Starscream there, but if Screamer hadn't been there I never woulda gotten left behind a week ago. And I know he's mad as the pit with me for everything, but he wouldn't, he fraggin' _couldn't_, let Laserbeak or Ratbat do that to me."

Ratchet and Red Alert exchanged skeptic looks over Frenzy's helm. The minicassette was pouting in his seat, staring dispassionately at his weak sparkling. "After everything, you still think Soundwave cares more about you than he does Megatron?" Ratchet asked.

"Yes." Frenzy's reply was automatic, but the second it was out of his vocalizer he stopped believing it. He hadn't thought it was possible to feel more alone. He could feel rage building against the chaos that had become his life. He hadn't just burned his bridges; he'd bombed them into oblivion.

The sparkberth chirped, and Ratchet stood automatically.

"What? Is something wrong?" Frenzy straightened up. The medic smiled and pointed at Crasher's optic band. There was a dim, but growing, glow behind it and in the hush of the quiet Med Bay the whirrs and clicks of a processor coming back online could be heard.

"Someone's finally waking up," Ratchet answered.

Frenzy sidled next to the berth, and slipped his finger into that tiny black hand. He glanced furtively over his shoulder at Red, but turned back when he felt the little fingers tighten around his. Crasher's optic band was fully lit now, and she turned her helm very slightly in his direction.

"Crash. It's me," he said softly, and Frenzy felt less alone.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Rumble had found a small storage room to hunker in for a while. Hopefully Laserbeak would be able to find him there, let him know how the mission went. There weren't any viewports in the room, and it was dark sitting leaned against the empty crates. Rumble didn't mind, it rather suited his mood at the moment.

Rumble had put in some very good practice pouting over the past two months. But this was more than that. That pouting had sort of fed itself into an anger that Rumble knew would soon get fully expressed. It was a relaxing, reassuring, kind of pouting. Eventually Frenzy would be back, and Rumble would blast him a new exhaust port, and life would go back to normal.

That had been the last couple months. He'd been pissy, surly, and lonelier than he'd ever been in his entire life. But this week had been hell. Soundwave had forced him to subspace before they'd even returned from their botched 'rescue' mission turned murder. When finally pulled out nearly a day later he was summarily ignored by almost everyone, and picked on by the rest. The few times he'd caught Megatron's optic were...unpleasant. Rumble resembled Frenzy enough to get punished by proxy it seemed. And Soundwave was constantly with Megatron. So Rumble did his best to keep out of sight.

His first few hours out of the box had alternated between profound grief and righteous anger. He was furious at Frenzy, for being stupid, for being weak, for being stubborn, but mostly for being selfish. He didn't care one wingnut that Frenzy had betrayed Megatron through disobedience. But Frenzy had betrayed him. Frenzy had shook off his hand. And now he was dead.

And that would turn Rumble to the grief. He couldn't fathom living without Frenzy, without at least one face that was mostly friendly beneath the sneer, without one soul who trusted him and kind of depended on him. Now he was alone forever. Frenzy's death seemed so pointless, so stupid; and he blamed Frenzy for it wholeheartedly. There was no one else he could safely blame.

When Laserbeak found him a few hours later to inform him that Frenzy had survived Rumble had almost pulled the birdbot out of the air to hug him. As long as Frenzy was alive things could go back to the way they were before. He was convinced that Frenzy couldn't have really defected, that if he could just get over there to explain things to him that his brother would be itching to come back. Soundwave would fix it all, Rumble just knew it. He had ways of making Megatron see things right, when it was important.

The sparkling's survival had put an annoying wrinkle in his dreams. But Laserbeak told him that it was weak, really hardly a real sparkling at all. Rumble was convinced that Frenzy couldn't really pick anything so pathetic over himself, now that he saw it he couldn't really want it. It went against everything being a Decepticon was all about. He was certain, mostly. Frenzy wouldn't even miss it. And even if he did, that's why Laserbeak did it stealthy. Sever the tie that was forcing him to stay with those slaggin' fleshy lovin' Autobots. Protectors of the weak, and the small, and other things that shouldn't be allowed to exist.

Rumble heard something enter the storage room. A faint _ching ching ching _of stealthy metal against the durasteel floor. Ravage loped over to sit next to Rumble, then sprawled out and laid his feline head on Rumble's leg. Scratching the other cassette behind the audial receptors, Rumble frowned throughtfully to himself. He wasn't much used to that particular expression, but he was genuinely troubled and was having a hard time finding a reason why that didn't lead him down the dangerous road of second guessing.

"He couldn't really want it, right Ravage? I mean, I know him. Who could know him better than his own brother? He was just having a hard time adjusting to all the Megatron slag, and this got all mixed up in it." Rumble's frown deepened, and Ravage whined.

"Yeah, I know." Rumble rested his hand between Ravage's ears. "As long as it's just between us cassettes, I miss him, too."

XXXXXXXXX

A/N: Sorry for the super long delay between posts, esp. after leaving you guys with such a bummer cliffy. I've just been having trouble getting modivated, hopefully with some support I can rekindle the fires and get this ball rolling again. I have the rest planned out, it's just getting it into prose that's holding me back.

Reviews are love.


	29. Chapter 29

[A/N: So sorry for the long hiatus. It's been really tough getting these last few chapters out. I'm chalking it up to post-partum depression. Heh, didn't think it applied to stories as well. Seriously though, there is an ending in sight, and, I hope, a strong point to be made in the ending of it.

I can't thank you guys enough for all the wonderful reviews that have really been keeping me going on this story the past few months when I almost felt like giving up. I would go back and re-read your wonderful, kind words, and remember the great support I've been getting from both friends and strangers, and that's what's keeping me going on it. So thanks again!

Oh and a sparkling's cry? Think a baby, crossed with a car alarm, crossed with the crows from Alfred Hitchcock's 'The Birds.'

Hope to get a new chapter up sooner than four months…heh. Any comments and critique are greatly, greatly, appreciated. Please let me know that you guys are still interested!]

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Frenzy leaned back in the Med Bay chair, and smiled. And it wasn't his snarky, defensive smile. He drew his legs up onto the oversized seat so that he could rest what he was carefully holding in the crook of his arm on his knee joint. Crasher bowed her head down, trying to get her optic band to focus on the larger black hand tickling the plating on her feet. She squeaked and wiggled. Frenzy smiled genuinely again, and continued gently prodding till she squealed and kicked against his hand.

From his workstation nearby, Hoist observed out of the corner of his visor. "Watch the cables," he gently reminded.

Frenzy frowned and pressed the external current adaptor tighter into the artificial socket installed on his sparkling's chest. Squealing in protest, Crasher's faceplates squinched into a grimace and a high pitched alarm came wailing out her mouth. Frenzy felt his spark sink. The _crying_. While Crasher's overall health had gained in micro-increments over the last week, Frenzy _knew_ her crying was getting stronger every day.

"Slag." Frenzy muttered, jostling the two-week old sparkling up and down like he'd seen First Aid do many times. Rather than soothing her, the bouncing only made Crasher more frantic. Her crying slid up a pitch and Frenzy slammed his head against the back of the chair in frustration. He stopped trying to rock her, and held her limp in his arms, helplessly watching her howling.

After a moment Hoist spoke up again from his workstation. "What else should you try?"

"Fragged if I know." Frenzy bit out through clenched dentals.

"Think." Hoist coaxed over the pulsing alarm coming from the sparkling.

Frenzy let out a strangled sigh of frustration, glaring down at his screaming daughter. "Come on Crash," he mumbled, "It's okay. Just. Just shut up for a second okay." He tried to make his voice lilt and coo like First Aid, or heck even Ironhide, was good at doing, but when he heard it in his own audials it sounded almost menacing. Still, after a few moments of talking, Crasher's screams dialed down to a distressed whine.

"Remember: hold her closer." Hoist prompted. Frenzy shot a jealous glare at Hoist, but the green maintenance bot was turned to his workstation and keeping busy. Frenzy gathered Crasher close to his chestplate, and hunched over her, mumbling. Almost instantly her whine died away to a whimper. The Mini-Cassette patted her gently on the back and whispered at her, frowning at the thought of the Autobot's optics on them.

"That's good," the green truck turned from his station. "You're getting better at this."

Frenzy shrugged, dismissive, and tried not to look at the grey and red sparkling nestling against him. "Where's Aid?" he asked. "I thought Aid was supposed to be here."

"The Protectobots called him out. I didn't hear what for, but it must have been important."

Crasher whined again and Frenzy glared at Hoist, practically demanding the Autobot turn around and mind his own business. The older 'Bot got the hint and as soon as his back was turned Frenzy was again whispering at his sparkling, running his finger across healing welds on her plating, and toying gently with her tiny hands.

The Med Bay doors opened and Ironhide entered. He cracked a smile at the sight of Frenzy and Crasher, but was careful to drop it when the young mech turned in the chair to face him.

"Checkin' up on me?" Frenzy sneered halfheartedly.

"Ya weren't at Re-Fuel, I figured ya musta come here so you could see 'er before work." Ironhide leaned against a medberth casually. "Heard Bumblebee's out on patrol, so he wasn't there ta pester ya ta go to the Fill-up."

"I had some energon here." Frenzy stood, Crasher close to his plating, and put her back in the sparkberth. She whimpered as he put her down, thrashing irritably as he rearranged the few cables still attached directly to her. "Shut it Crash," he shushed at her, then gave her his fingers to play with, but glared at Ironhide just the same. "Sittin around for Fill-up's just a huge waste of time anyway. I'm already snoozin' through half your fraggin day, why waste time listenin' to a buncha slaggers shootin' the shit?"

"Would it kill ya to try an' make some friends?" Ironhide asked.

Frenzy snorted. "It might. Hell, hasn't it come close a couple times? But apparently for the past week Captain Spaz has managed to keep the assassins at bay."

Ironhide didn't reply, rather he dipped his large hand into the sparkberth and allowed Crasher to grasp the very tip of his finger. The old mech felt a grin creep across his mouth even in the face of Frenzy's withering glare. "How's the work goin'?" the older Autobot asked casually.

"It's almost over." Frenzy grumbled, "Just a couple more days."

"That bad huh?"

"Ya know if I hadn't had to work with a bunch of lube-sucking exhaust ports it would be easier to _make friends_," Frenzy said 'make friends' with the same tone of normally used to say 'contract virulent strains of cosmic rust'.

Ironhide sighed. "Look, just, just try, okay kid? I know Huffer an' Beachcomber can be a little-"

"I'm not talking 'bout _those_ slaggers. They leave me the hell alone. I'm talkin' 'bout Brawn. And fraggin' Sideswipe."

"What does Sideswi-"

"Doesn't matter. I'm handling it." Frenzy clipped. The Minicassette pulled away from Crasher, ignoring her protesting whine, and brushed his hands off on his chest, running them over the round bolt shape of his probationary locator beacon, the now useless cassette reels, and the scarred and marred remnants of his Decepticon insignia. To Ironhide it seemed he was trying to brush the aura of parenthood away now that there were too many witnesses in the room. "We'll be fine. If I don't beat his slaggin' head in." Frenzy abruptly turned for the door. "Gotta go. If I'm late I get my aft chewed."

"See ya arou-" But Frenzy was out the Med Bay door before Ironhide could finish.

"Well someone recharged with his plugs in backwards." Hoist commented, walking up to the sparkberth.

Ironhide shrugged and dangled his thick grey finger in front of Crasher's visor. The sparkling regarded it seriously, reached up with both hands, and after a few misses managed to grab hold of the very end of it. Ironhide grinned again, completely in spite of himself. "Yeah, been like that fer four days. Almost since work started. Damned if I know why. You an' Aid are gonna have a blast with 'im this evening during MPT, I can just tell."

Hoist began gathering together detailing equipment to do the fine cleaning on Crasher's smaller parts, a task Frenzy hadn't quite gotten the hang of yet. "First Aid and I are actually starting with Memory Core Analysis, before we move on to the Meta-Processor Therapy."

"You're takin' 'im right into _that_?" Ironhide scoffed. "The kid's got the self-concept of a broken laser disk player, and you take 'im right into his whole screwed-up past? Before figuring out who he thinks he's supposed to be first? Doesn't Primary Function usually come first?" Ironhide was no processor therapist, of course, but every 'Bot had seen one at one time or another, mostly on Optimus' orders. The Autobot leader wanted his soldiers healthy, in every respect.

Hoist put down a tin of wax, and picked up a soft chamois. "In this case we have to, Ironhide. First Aid thinks—and I agree—that it's possible that the majority of the information stored on Frenzy's Memory Core is mislabeled, misfiled, and poorly linked, to the point of forcible isolation and full on indexing errors. Frenzy has to see the his past clearly and completely before he can come to terms with himself."

"Yeah, yeah." Ironhide waved him off, looking down at Crasher thoughtfully. "Just be careful with him, okay? I know Aid means well, but there's stuff he's jus' never gonna see deep enough ta fix."

Hoist patted the other Autobot fraternally, and Ironhide did his best not to shrug off the awkward reassurance. "Yes, of course we'll take it slow. Start with the basics. Not all of it is quite as… sensitive. I'm sure we have _a lot_ of mislabeled information to wade through. Because denial _is_ more than just a river in Egypt; sometimes it becomes a whole way of life."

XXXXXXX

There were a lot of reasons for Frenzy to hate this ridiculous job. Heat, lava, rules, _Autobots_. The sheer banality of tedious, careful, demolition work. On the other hand, he got to smash stuff, which almost outweighed all the negatives. He pulled back, pile drivers at the ready, and scrutinized the neon pink line painted around the base of a stalagmite on the cavern floor. He glanced to his right at the lava pool, and his left where Brawn and Sideswipe were methodically dismantling a huge, rock column. Frenzy sucked hot, heavy air through his fans, and let pile-drivers bite into the rock. He was careful to hold back, only use just enough force to shatter the stalagmite.

On the first day of demolitions Frenzy had been overly enthusiastic, still worked up over Crasher's close call from couple days before, and slammed into a rock column with enough force to open a huge stress fracture on the cavern ceiling. Much to his surprise he wasn't yelled at for it. Instead he was subjected to hours of low-level, drawn-out, scorn from Sideswipe, Brawn, and Huffer in the form of complaints, comments, and dirty looks as they repaired the fissure. It'd been twice as infuriating as a full-on beating would have been. Later on in the day Huffer eased-off after he heard about Crasher's brush with death; and a muttered comment from the engineer shut up Sideswipe and Brawn. But now that the sparkling was rumored to be on the mend, the looks and comments were coming back around.

As Frenzy broke the stalagmite off at the base, a small, yellow semi-truck pulling a wagon of rubble pulled up next to Frenzy's crushed stalagmite. Huffer transformed and grabbed the largest chunks of broken rock from around Frenzy's worksite, throwing them effortlessly into the cart. He pointed to a nearby column.

"You think you can handle that one?" The Autobot asked.

Frenzy nodded and ignited his thrusters. Damn, but it felt good to fly again. Not being able to transform was hard enough. If he hadn't been able to fly, if there hadn't been some kind of specialized action that he was still master of, Frenzy didn't know what he would do. He held his drivers at ready as he flew up to get started loosening the top of the column.

"Hey!" the call was sharp, "_We're_ handling that one!" Frenzy looked down where Brawn was shaking a fist at him. "We're taking that one down next." He pointed to an outcropping of low, lumpy stalagmites closer to the lava and consequently the heat. "You take those."

Frenzy frowned, anger and annoyance building up. "Huffer told me to do this one," he retorted, turning his away and raising a pile-driver to the rock. He heard a crackling rush behind him, and felt a presence hovering menacingly over his shoulder. Frenzy glanced out of the corner of his optic at the jet-packed Autobot Warrior looming midair near him.

"_We're_ doing this one." Sideswipe was clearly using every ounce of his will to stay passably civil. "It's on a fault line, understand. It requires _finesse_. And you're not the only one who can fly." Sideswipe pointed to the short, stumpy stalagmites. "There's a lot to do over _there_. There's plenty of little rocks you can smash without damaging the cavern. Over there."

If looks could kill, Sideswipe would be just another pool of melted slag in the cavern. His battle-rage singing in his head, Frenzy could feel himself just seconds away from smashing the smug Autobot's helmet between the column and one round flat pile-driver. Looks were usually nonlethal, but pile-drivers were another story. Nothing was stopping him from murder but the barest ounce of control he'd gained from dealing with Starscream back at Decepticon Headquarters. That didn't mean he was backing down though. "Huffer told me—"

At the base of the column Huffer held up both hands innocently. "Hey, it was just a suggestion. Don't go dragging me into a useless fight." The engineer transformed and pulled the wagon over to the short stalagmites. "No need to argue over who gets to do the hard work."

Sideswipe nodded to the engineer, satisfied smile on his faceplates. "Thanks Huffer." He turned his back on the Decepticon defector and started beating away the top of the column.

Frenzy was not in the mood to be dismissed. "I could have done it." he protested.

Sideswipe didn't face him. "It's not worth arguing about." the warrior muttered, hammering away with his small, square drivers. "Let's just get this done so it's finished."

Frenzy flew down to the stalagmites and got to work. Not because he had given in, but because if he didn't get to smashing something _that second_ he knew he was going to snap. He pounded into the lumpy rock formations furiously. Chips of stone flew from under his drivers.

"Hey! Watch it!" Huffer cried, as a rain of volcanic rock pelted against his plating. Frenzy slammed against the stalagmite again. "No need to get so worked up about it!" Huffer whined. "Frenzy?"

"What!" Frenzy snapped, bristling with frustration. "_What_ do you have ta bitch about _this time_!"

Huffer's mouthplates shut with an audible click. Behind the Autobot's surprise was the barest glimmer of fear, fear that thrilled Frenzy. The small semi turned away and got started throwing rubble into the wagon. "You were hitting me with rock chips," the engineer muttered.

"Then go work somewhere else," Frenzy fumed, pounding away at the next short, misshapen stalagmite.

"Oh, grow the hell up." Brawn growled as he approached to throw a hunk of the dismantled column into the wagon. The demolitions expert brushed his hands off and gave Frenzy a meaningful glare.

"What did you say?" Frenzy's pile drivers were out, and looking less and less like tools by the astrosecond.

"You're gonna stay with us, you're gonna have to learn to work with us." Brawn wagged his finger. "Everybody pulls their own weight here. Together."

"I _am_ working." Frenzy hissed.

"Good." Brawn crossed his arms over his chest, looking not only irritated but uncharacteristically thoughtful. Almost somber. "Because you got a lot to make up for."

"What does that mean?" Frenzy demanded. The sweltering air crackled around the infuriated Mini-Cassette. Brawn regarded him critically, but then relented, dropping every posture of aggression.

"Bah, forget it. Let's get this done." He barked, and wandered back his pile of rocks.

Sideswipe had landed, and was leaning against the rubble of the dismantled column, watching the altercation. Frenzy glared at him, and the red warrior shook his head turning away, muttering to himself.

_Murderer_

Everything in the room was arranged to be soothing, from the dim lighting, to the chairs carefully positioned to look casual, to the workstation nudged to the side, providing half a barrier between two of the chairs. Only half a barrier, that was important. The room was sparse otherwise, intimate yet spacious. But here and there in the corner and on the workstation, were little bits of things, tiny pools of complexity to draw the optic. A few technical models repurposed as knick-knacks, a couple fractals hanging on the wall in swirls of pure artistic math. This was Hoist's office.

_Murderer_

Hoist was the Autobot remaining on base with the most training in meta-processor therapies., Since being isolated on Earth it had become his passion, though it hadn't been his original field. The tolerant maintenance 'Bot had spent countless eons tuning-up Autobot bodies; it wasn't too far of a leap to begin working on Autobot minds. Optimus was glad for it, and though Hoist kept his original medical role, Optimus wouldn't hesitate to send a mech who needed a little verbal realignment to Hoist for a 'special chat' either.

_Murderer_

Hoist sat in one chair, behind the desk. First Aid sat in another next to him. The chair with the sullen Frenzy in it sat across a pool of dim, warm light on the floor. Hoist glanced over at the nearly faceless mech beside him, and wondered for the fifth or sixth time if it was a good idea for both of them to be in here at once. Patients should never feel outnumbered, but First Aid, as kind and oblivious as ever, had insisted that Frenzy needed both Hoist's expertise and the familiarity provided by the Autobot doctor. First Aid gently repeated his question.

_Murderer_

"Do you know what a Primary Function is, Frenzy?"

Frenzy shrugged. "I'm sure you'll tell me." He crossed his arms over his chest, defenses at maximum.

First Aid nodded to Hoist, who eased back in his chair to explain. Hoist knew it was important to appear casual, especially when things were at their most clinical. "Sometimes it's a hard concept to master Frenzy; but, simply put, a Primary Function is why you think you are, and what you think you do."

"That's slaggin' _simply_ put? Cuz' it didn't make any sense." Frenzy scoffed.

"Alright, an example then," Hoist pointed to himself. "I am a maintenance bot, I drag my friends in for tune-ups they don't think they need because I want everyone feeling their best, not just good enough to get by. And I'm very good at my job. I enjoy my work, and I feel called to do it. A Primary Function is what you are called to do." Hoist leaned in, still casually, in order to increase confidence for the next question. "Is there anything you feel like that about, Frenzy? Do you have a Primary Function?"

_Murderer._

Frenzy shifted in his chair so he could see the edge of the door. "Uh...I'm good at breakin' shit. Warrior? Maybe?" Warrior brought back visions of Sideswipe in the cavern; his disgusted mouthplates still forming the word 'murderer', but Frenzy mentally flipped the Red Lamborghini the one-fingered salute, and finally locked away the murderous refrain that had been playing in his mind. _I'll deal with that slagger later._

"Mm-hmmm." Hoist nodded. "Good. Well, we'll get into all that eventually, I just wanted an idea where we were starting at."

First Aid rested his elbows on his knees, also appearing casual. "Do you know what Memory Core Analysis is Frenzy?"

"Like an interrogation?" Frenzy mimed drilling into his optic band with a finger and a sneer.

"No. No for Primus'sake no." Hoist laughed uncomfortably. "Information in the Memory Core can get mislabeled and misfiled, and can cause errors in reasoning and judgment. In MCA we'll walk you through some memories, facts, make sure you have them filed correctly. Make sure you understand correctly what really happened rather than just your perceptions of it."

"So we're just talking? About my memories?"

"Yes."

"Can't I just get interrogated instead?" Frenzy whined.

"Does the idea of this make you feel uncomfortable Frenzy?" First Aid asked.

"No." Frenzy snapped. "It just sounds boring as slag. Like...watching slag cool. In hell."

First Aid laughed. "Well, that's why we have a short session tonight, Frenzy. So why don't we just start from the beginning? And take it slow and easy. Okay?"

Frenzy sighed and slumped in his chair. "Okay." It was the most unenthusiastic okay of all time.

Hoist leaned, ever so carefully casual, on the half-barrier of a desk. "Okay. We'll start with some of your earliest memories then."

"Umm, okay. Whatever."

"What would you say your earliest memory is?" Hoist asked.

Frenzy frowned at his feet. "Uh… I don't know."

First Aid prompted him. "Is anything coming to mind? Any memory at all?"

"Nope."

Hoist nodded, knowingly. "That's probably because your memories are inaccurately labeled. Have you ever attempted to recall events from when you were a sparkling? Or youngling?"

"Why would I?"

"The question is more accurately, why wouldn't you?" Hoist's voice took on a more concerned tone. "There is the possibility that your mind isolated this information, kept if from linking with other data, to protect you."

Now Frenzy was getting nervous. "Protect me from what?"

"Unpleasant memories, Frenzy." Hoist once again leaned back to give Frenzy space. "Things that attack our ideas on how the universe is supposed to be, or how we are supposed to be in it. Your core processor may have gone to great lengths to bury these memory files."

Frenzy sighed. "So, earliest memories are a no-go then?"

"Not exactly. We'll just have to trace them back. Do you remember joining the Decepticons?"

Frenzy's face knotted up with the effort. His optic band focusing on one of the fractals hanging on the wall. In his processor was the disconcerting feeling of error-ridden memories sliding back and forth around each other, broken up by long spans of darkness. Still, there was something there. A word at least. "Darkmount?" he said finally.

"What about it?"Hoist coaxed.

"I don't fraggin' know."Frenzy shrugged helplessly. "What do you know about it?"

"Darkmount was a Decepticon fortress, a factory." First Aid explained. "Megatron used some of his cronies to run it and the surrounding city."

"The city...Polyhex?" Frenzy was surprised how easily the name came to him.

"Yes. That's right Frenzy."First Aid nodded. "But what about it?"

"Was there... a fight in Polyhex? The last fight there? A really long one?"

"Yes." Hoist answered. "The Autobots lay siege to Polyhex for months. Many Earth months. The Decepticons eventually had to abandon it and pull back to Kaon. It was the last major Autobot victory in the War."

Other cities came spilling back into Frenzy's mind. Vos, Tarn, Praxus, Althiex...Kalis and Tyrest.

_Tyrest._ The name meant something to him, but his jumbled datatracks only coughed out wads of half-remembered longing, and nothing else.

"Darkmount then." Frenzy said. "During the siege, they brought us to Darkmount, just Rumble and me and not the others. And we became Decepticons." The memory suddenly crystallized in his processor, in warped color and static, but complete, comprehensible. Rumble sitting close, shoulder to his shoulder in the dark trailer, the engine humming, speeding, and jostling them; until the sudden stop. The hands hastily sweeping them out of the back of the transport. Darkmount and Soundwave there, waiting. Tall and silent, in the glow of the smelting pools and the fires of the burning city.

"The 'others'?" First Aid asked giving Hoist a sideways glance. "Who were the 'others'?"

"I...I...They were like us, but we weren't—they kept us kinda away." These memories were barely coherent, every few seconds bringing another hitch or blank. "They were other younglings I guess. Everyone had their little place, and we all waited, for everything. But… there was lots of yelling when only we left. Only we- me an' Rumble- got called up, and not the others."

"Where was this?"Hoist sounded like he half knew the answer.

At first Frenzy shrugged; but then made an effort to remember, trying to trace the transport back in his mind. He shrugged again for real. "Somewhere boring." His processor found an abandoned label. He added it with a burst of clarity, "Polyhex. Hired Guardian."

First Aid turned in his chair to face Hoist. "That sounds plausible. Polyhex was one of the last refuges for Decepticon-allied civilians, factory workers and the like."

Hoist nodded. "I remember. And I know they 'encouraged'- probably forced- their workers to turn their younglings over to hired guardians. It freed them up to work long factory hours." Hoist drummed his fingers on the work-station, deliberating. "When the Decepticons pulled out of Polyhex...I heard of mass suicides, executions. Anyone who couldn't be moved, anyone who couldn't be useful, killed rather than let them fall into Autobot hands."

Frenzy frowned at the two Autobots, suddenly, intensely, uncomfortable. _All the others? No wonder they were pissed._

"Was Rumble with you the whole time?" Hoist asked, attention back on Frenzy.

"Yes."

"Think back." First Aid challenged. "Was there ever a time when Rumble wasn't with you?"

"No." There was no moment of reflection. He didn't need it.

"And you are sure that he's your brother?" Hoist leaned forward.

"_Yes_."Frenzy was annoyed at the question.

"Why?" Hoist asked.

"Uhh… what?"

"How do you know he's your brother? There must be a reason you know this." Hoist asked calmly, but it still threw Frenzy for a loop.

"I- I don't remember."

"Okay." Hoist glanced at First Aid, who seemed a little lost as well. "Then we'll try a different way. Tell us about Rumble."

"What about Rumble?"

"What's he like?" First Aid offered.

"Haven't you met him?" Frenzy demanded.

Hoist shook his head, bemused. "I mean, what's he like to you?"

"Rumble is...uhh... He's older." Frenzy frowned as he thought. "I mean, we're the same age, but he's always been...bigger? He can handle himself better. When he fights he's not completely off his gears like I am. He stays kinda more in control. And he's stronger."

"Stronger how?"

Frenzy carefully organized his thoughts into something almost coherent. "He can handle himself around the rest'a the old 'Con crew better. He just puts up with shit different. He doesn't get...frozen."

"And you do?" First Aid asked.

"No. I mean, yeah. Yeah, for some stuff. And then he's there, to back me up. To pull me outta the slag. I mean we've got each other's back," A pause, then slower, "I mean we did." Frenzy felt a pang, but continued, "But I always seemed to need my aft pulled outta the smelter more often."

"Like when?" Hoist encouraged.

"Like when I let Hound and that big slagger, Skyfire, get to the shield generator. That big oil grab thing. With the fleshies' supercomputer. I fell for a stupid hologram trick, left my post, and the whole plan went to the Pit. Megatron was gonna have my diodes on a golden disk, but Rumble kept me under the radar until things blew over. Soundwave was another story; but Rumble kept Megatron offa my back."

"How?"

Frenzy shrugged, but crossed his arms over his chest tighter with a barely perceptible shudder.

First Aid glanced to Hoist. There was a tiny shake of the doctor's head, and Hoist quickly changed the subject.

"What about before, in Polyhex? Did he watch your back then?"

"Yeah, I guess." Frenzy's face was twisted with the effort of thinking. He stared at the fractals, following the math as he tried to trace damaged files. "They kept us together. We recharged together, and...I didn't like not having him close. Always had to know where he was."

"How mature were you when you first came to the guardians?"First Aid was already trying to put a timeline together.

"Hell if I know."

"Frenzy," Hoist reproved, "We're trying to trace you back to origins. Now think. Run a full system search. Try searching for recharging with Rumble. That link may not be under protection warnings. It may get us in past isolation.

"Yeah, but..." Frenzy's optics flared for a moment, and he sat straight up like he'd been jolted. "I...I...Where was Tyrest?"

"Decepticon city." First Aid answered, startled. "Close to Kalis, but pretty far from Polyhex. Why?"

"There...was something there?"

"Yeah, some of the first combiner battles." Hoist and First Aid shared sideways glances that Frenzy ignored. "But nothing of real strategic value, except that the Autobots held Kalis and the Decepticons Tyrest. For a while, before they were abandoned, the city was just one big warzone."

"When, after Polyhex?"

First Aid shook his head. "No before. Why? Are you remembering anything about it? Are you recalling data or memory files? Is it encrypted transcript or audio and visual files?"

What _was_ he remembering? In between hitches and blanks where his core processor had tried to isolate and break down the memory files, there were fleeting ghosts of images and snatches of distorted sound. The watchful dark, with glows from the windows. His brother's arms and his arms, tangled so tight together they were almost one. In the box, no, just _a_ box, together. A soft box, with a sturdy little gate made of meshed wires. And in the dark, across from the box, a slender shadow watching the window, outlined against the flaring lights, talking. Soothing. Voice hidden and muffled by the explosions from outside and the static of files too long neglected. Outside the window the sky was raining orange fire against blackness and stars. Fire and stars.

"Frenzy?" Hoist inclined his head, concerned.

"Nothing. I—It doesn't _mean_ anything. I, think there's too many slaggin' errors. In all of it. No way I'm gonna remember anything worth all this shit." Frenzy waved them off. "I, I gotta go. I mean, I don' wanna miss Crasher's feeding tonight. I got slag ta do." The Minicassette hopped off the chair and brushed himself off. "We're done." He said flatly.

XXXXXXXXXX

Frenzy glared at the chronometer on his computer terminal. He should have been recharging for the last four hours, but not with the way his processor was whirling and his tanks were churning. Wheeljack's recharge machine was up on a shelf, but Frenzy had been wary of it since the time it had jolted him awake at Laserbeak's command. The part of him that was exhausted was furious at the stubborn parts of him that were buzzing with anxiety, but he was going to try and get wound down on his own.

He sat at his terminal drumming his fingers on the keyboard, more than perfectly aware that there was absolutely nothing interesting to do on his computer. But it kept his mind off things. He brought up another parental instruction program, but after scanning Diagram A. 'Applying Wax To Sparkling Plating" And Diagram B. 'Removing Wax From Sparkling Plating' he shut the terminal down and wandered over to the other end of the room. Frenzy sat down on the edge of his berth, but then got up and shuffled over to the blue corner of the room.

He inattentively started rearranging the objects in the sparkling's corner. Chamois, solvents, and sponges on the bottom shelf. Toys on the top. On second thought, Frenzy gathered up all the toys in his arms and wandered over to the berth with them. Sitting on the berth with the brightly colored, many buttoned cubes, balls, and mobiles he poked and played with them in the clinical manner of a being who never had anything to play with that didn't scream and bleed.

He let his mind wander back to the corrupted memory chips he'd rediscovered. The hired guardian. They hadn't had toys, or nothing like these anyway. _Garbage_, Frenzy thought, _ junk and old busted slag...that's what we played with. _Frenzy fiddled with Hound's holographic mobile while his processor mulled over the broken scraps of memory he'd found.

Rumble and Frenzy in Polyhex. They'd played 'weapons', axes and blasters made from old bits of pipe, wires, twisted metal sheets. When the guardian wasn't close, the younglings would all viciously attack each other in deadly serious imitation of the big warrior 'Cons they saw walking the streets. The younglings hoarded their weapons, ganged up, all picking on the weakest, or the strongest, jostling for superiority; but never Rumble against Frenzy.

Rumble and Frenzy were by far the smallest, and treated differently, kept apart from the others, and watched closer. And no creators ever came to see them during visiting hours. No haggard, smoke stained, wrecks ever wandered in to look at them for a couple cycles. These work-weary husks would stand by the wall, half a room away from the younglings, and stare at them; unwilling or unable to bridge the distance between. The ghost of a broken bond turned into only the sparsest right, the right to witness, paralyzed. All but the thin claim of creator to creation dissolved away and alienated.

Rumble and Frenzy had no one but each other. They clung to this fiercely and instinctively. In a universe where everyone and everything was bigger, stronger, and out for themselves, Rumble and Frenzy together could hold their own. Alone, they made for easy targets. Frenzy shivered and batted the memory away.

Frenzy leaned back on his berth and triggered the mobile, watching the shifting globes of light join and separate, blending colorfully in time to the rhythmic music. He set the mobile on the far edge of the berth, dimmed the lights, and curled up on his side watching the show. His fingers traced the silvery scars on his chest where his nanites were breaking down the welds and rebuilding his plating. A slash of silver ran right over his Decepticon insignia, cutting it in two. With all his strength he willed himself to fall asleep alone.

Somewhere in his processor, a carefully constructed firewall was breaking down one line of coding at a time, and behind it were a hundred distorted horrors clamoring to be relived. Frenzy, exhausted and terrified, watched the mobile dance and desperately tried to remember how he'd taught himself to forget.

_No, Fuck no, not that one_, he thought to himself, his tanks turning. _Or that. Fuck. Stop it._ He flopped onto his back, but with a shudder sat up again, resting his head in his hands helplessly. Again and again he dragged his processor away from the waiting arms of a nightmare, and the struggle dredged up more old memories. Finally he stumbled into one that was, at least, bearable, and, unthinkingly, he settled into it, too tired to fight.

Salty, slimy waves lapped against a mossy line where the ocean met the rock. Dripping, Frenzy scrabbled for a better position on the cold slick rock, and stared into the empty dark sea. At his feet beneath the water he could see the slope of the continental shelf slide down into black abyss. Behind him, obscured by distance and fog, was a shoreline he couldn't see. The rock was solitary, no bigger around than a sub-compact car, jutting barely above the waterline, a tiny island forced into the air by some earthquake or eruption on the cliff's edge where the ocean floor dropped away from the water-piercing light.

The salt from the sea was beginning to crust and dry on his plating. Especially in his joints after his long swim from Decepticon Base. He stared down at his hands, already feeling the itchy microcrystals begin to form in the hairline cracks between his fingerplates. He frowned and ran his finger gingerly down the front of his chestplate, around the edges, making sure that his chassis was locked tight, despite the ache. He had a sudden fear of salt water getting to his internals, corroding his circuitry. He checked his chestplate hinges, and noticed one was a little loose, still sore. Bent? He brushed it off frantically, but then stopped himself, putting both hands purposefully on his kneecaps and glaring at the waves. _It's shut, dammit, that's all the tighter it ever fraggin shut._ He told himself this, but a twisting blind panic in Frenzy wondered if his chestplates would ever feel shut enough.

_Shit, stop it, forget it. Nobody else thinks it's a big deal, so slaggin' get over yourself._ Frenzy deliberately shut that part of his processor down and instead focused on exactly how long he could sit out here before he needed to scrape up the nerve to go back to Base. It was a nice, neutral train of thought, so Frenzy savored his indecision for at least half an hour. Until he heard a splashing behind him.

He whirled around just in time to see two purple hands, and between them a wide smirk beneath a red visor. Rumble pushed Frenzy from the rock with a splash and then climbed atop it. He stood, hands on hips, watching and grinning as his brother struggled to scramble back on the tiny island.

"What the frag Rumble?" Frenzy growled pulling himself up out of the water, and then standing. "What the hell didja do that for?"

The purple cassetticon shrugged, a 'who me?' expression on his faceplates. "Aww come on Frenzy...lighten the hell up. It's no big deal."

Frenzy turned away, arms crossed tight. "Fuck off. Ya think I came up here cuz' I wanted slaggin' _company_?"

Rumble snorted and punched him on the shoulder. "Where were you last night huh?" He asked, leering.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Frenzy leered back, "Go to the Pit."

After regarding him up and down, Rumble laughed, "Heh. New scratches." He gave his brother a poke on the chest. "And ya got some grey paint on you."

Frenzy's fist came out of nowhere catching his brother on the jaw and sending him flying backwards into the ocean. Turning so he didn't even see the splash, Frenzy considered leaving, but something kept him rooted to the rock, and the moment. He sat down, curled tight, and didn't watch his brother pull himself out of the water to sit beside him. There was an uncharacteristic silence between the brothers, and over them both a heavy weight loomed.

"Look." Rumble's voice was low. "What I meant to say was, uh..." He sighed, for a moment in every way the older brother, "Look. It's. I know that what happened—that it isn't—wasn't really..."as he trailed off Rumble drew his legs up to his chest, crossed his arms around himself. His next sigh was ragged, "Look. Frenzy. I should have warned you."

"Warned me?" Frenzy turned his head, Rumble was looking at the waves lapping against the slimy rock, his face unreadable.

"Yeah. I should have warned you about him. Ya know he does that with everybody right? But I thought that...that maybe with the two of us being so alike, and you being in the box so much, that maybe he just wouldn't think..." Rumble stopped when Frenzy shuddered against him. "But. But I should have at least warned you, you know, so you would know what to—I don't know—what to expect."

The realization slowly dawned. "You mean...you too?"

"Oh. Yeah. Of course." Rumble replied lightly, but lifelessly; he was turned so his face was obscured.

"For how long?"

"A while, I guess. I don't know."

"And, and a lot?" Frenzy felt a sudden surge of fear.

"Naw, not really." Rumble patted him on the shoulder, and then left his hand there gripping his arm. "Ya get used to it. Really. I don't even think about it anymore. Just, just try not to think about it, okay? Okay Frenzy?"

Frenzy nodded. "Okay," he offered, meekly. Rumble dropped the arm, but so they sat supporting each other.

"And. And Frenzy?" Rumble's voice was tight, Frenzy had never heard him like this before. "Frenzy, I'm sorry I didn't warn you."

The two brothers sat on the rock, leaning on each other. Around them the ocean and the sky stretched away to emptiness. Rumble and Frenzy sat watching it silently, uncharacteristically still. Rumble gripped his brother's hand, they sat back to back supporting each other, alone together.


	30. Chapter 30

A/N: Not only is this an extra-long update, but it's coming only about two months since the last one! Hey that's pretty good considering the past year! Hooray! This chapter was really supposed to be the _first_ _part_ of a chapter that was just getting too darn long. My goal is to have another chapter up at least before the two year anniversary of this story in late October. And once again I must reiterate that there IS an end in sight. A _planned_ end. And it shall be rightfully huge. (I hope?)

Thanks to everyone who has been supporting me through this. Especially Ha-Hee Prime, Elevensies, and CoraxOnyx. Are you guys better writers than friends? It's a tossup. Because all of you are like ninja Superman at both.

I have so many dedicated friends helping, and readers reading. I really wanna give a special shout-out to That Buggy Girl, formerly Skyjack she's been so supportive in her reviews from the very beginning, nearly two years ago! She makes me like the Movieverse twins sometimes. It's a dangerous power she uses as a force for good. Thanks for reading pal! And thanks to everyone who had reviewed, faved, and put on watch!

XXXXXXXX

The shrieks sank into his audio receptors and resonated deeply into his spark. He could feel his systems rev with each agonized groan; each screech of laser-fire, each ground-rattling explosion sending tremors up his feet and all across his body. The pistols in his hands sang out, recoil pressing into his palms. But above all, those wonderful, terrified, death squeals.

They were below him, the humans, running and pushing, frantically climbing over chairs, people, anything to get away from the lasers, the earthquakes, and the Decepticons. Frenzy didn't know where on Earth they were attacking, or even why. All he cared is that he'd been given two pistols and a job to do that involved the instructions, 'Make them panic. Kill as many as you want.'

A woman had been pushed to the ground, Frenzy saw her for only an astrosecond, long enough to record the image into his processor. The brown- red color of her hair, the terrified look on her face, the broken heel on her left shoe. He saw her long enough to take aim, to pull the trigger, to watch the flaming, gaping hole blossom between her shoulders, to remember the agonized expression that passed briefly through her eyes before she slumped beneath a dozen fleeing feet.

Frenzy was laughing. Frenzy was the happiest he'd been in months, maybe years. Because they were shrieking as he shot them, and he treasured every sound. And his memory chips recorded every dying gasp. To have for the rest of his life.

Each human face, the look of it, when those pistols sang out in his hands.

Frenzy came out of recharge like a bullet out of a gun. He woke sitting up in his berth, his piledrivers quivering in the air, his engine whining with the battle rage that was singing through his systems. The dark, electric quiet pressed in around his motionless, hypercharged frame, drawing the edge off his rage. Frenzy's shoulder's hitched as his piledrivers retracted into his arms, and then his whole body slumped. The tight knot of anger flared again, this time directed at himself, and he lashed out with his fist. He felt soothing pain burst across his knuckles as they rammed into the wall.

Another Memory Core glitch. They'd become an everyday occurrence and with no real distinction made between Frenzy's processor at recharge and Frenzy's processor at work. Something in his core had been triggered, some malicious new program had coded itself and was busy gnawing away his firewalls; and his metaprocessor was having a blast linking and cross linking this fragmented, long-buried, information with anything and everything it could find some common denominator with.

Frenzy slid off the berth in the room that still didn't really feel like his own, and triggered the lights. He checked his chronometer; still a couple hours till his waking cycle should have started. He sat back on the berth with a sigh, rubbing his visor and batting the lingering images away from his processor. The human faces darted in and out of his conscious mind, but he gritted his teeth and clamped down on them harder, making his Memory Core fight for every snippet of a file it managed to push through his defenses.

The things that he'd done, and had done to him, and the things he was doing even now, none of them made for pleasant contemplation. It didn't matter if the still active part of his Decepticon identity was berating him for betraying Soundwave and Rumble, or if a newly active part of some developing sappy, Autobot-like conscience was beginning to bring up new images to haunt him, neither seemed inclined to let him sleep in peace.

And Frenzy didn't have the slightest inclination of letting either rattle around in his processor uncontested. So with a groan and a sigh Frenzy hauled himself from the berth and to the doors of his quarters. He ducked his head in as the doors opened, picking a spot on the floor to watch that would allow him to avoid the optics of any Autobots he might pass in the hallways, and he headed for Med Bay.

But an hour later, even the lessons in the Med Bay weren't going well. Again.

Laying one hand on the back of one very irritated young parent, First Aid wished for the thousandth time that he could genuinely smile. An inscrutable mouthplate- visor combination was just fine for a warrior mech, maybe someone in special operations or prisoner interrogations, but it was completely useless for a doctor. And even more so for a teacher. First Aid could only nod, knowing once again that this was a moment where he would've—if he could've—smiled reassuringly at his increasingly frustrated student.

Frenzy hunched over the sparkberth in the Med Bay, his irritation making the climb into full blown anger. In one hand he held a container of energon and a siphon hose. His other hand was trying, and failing, to get a grip on the back of his sparkling's neck as she whined and thrashed in the little berth.

"Look at her, Frenzy. Watch the way she's moving." First Aid coaxed. "What is she trying to tell you?"

"That she's pissed the slag off. And she doesn't want me doin' this." Frenzy tried to get a tighter grip on Crasher's neck and she whimpered.

"Now, now be careful." First Aid reprimanded. Frenzy yanked his hand was out of the berth, growling out a strangled cry of repressed rage.

"Think." First Aid gently reminded. "You've done this before. You remember. You just need to think about it. What was the first step to refuel? Did you do that?"

"Slag, I don't know. I _don't_ remember." Frenzy hissed, fiddling with the siphon.

"Yes, you _do_." First Aid insisted. "It's all up there, in your data tracks. You just need to convince your processor to actually retrieve the information."

"I forgot a step again, didn't I?" Frenzy grimaced, "I forgot another fraggin' step."

First Aid nodded, and gestured back to Crasher, who was restlessly reaching for the siphon. "What is _she_ trying to tell you?"

"She's slagging hungry. I already _know_ she is, because it's today's first re-fuel."

"And?" First Aid didn't want to supply Frenzy one datapoint more than he needed to. The young parent's processer _had_ to forge these connections themselves, or he would never be able to consciously remember.

"And she didn't want _this_." The cassetticon held up the siphon. There was a long pause. Then a nod and another would-have-been smile from First Aid.

"Why?" the doctor coaxed.

Frenzy glared at the siphon, and then growled to himself, turning around to whip a small vial off a nearby workstation. He poured the contents of the vial into the end of the siphon and shook the can. "Cus' I forgot the fraggin' carborundum. Stupid geothermal energon, gotta get treated first."

"Good!" First Aid, "And what does she get after this feeding?"

"Cybertonium crystals, and carburetor cleaner." Cupping Crasher's neck again, Frenzy tried to tip the end of the siphon hose into Crasher's mouth, grumbling when some splashed out of the end of the hose onto her neck. She fought it until the first drops of fuel hit her tanks, and then she sucked down the energon.

"I know, I know, I gotta get that cleaned up." Frenzy muttered. "Or it'll tarnish the finish on her plating."

"Right." First Aid patted Frenzy on the back, and turned to get a small case, putting it on the workstation. "And don't forget to check her filters: air, fuel, and oil. She may not need them changed every day, but it's still important. And she needs a good detailing anyway. Why don't you show me you know how to do that too?"

Frenzy nodded stoically. But when First Aid had his back turned the Mini-Cassette slumped, banging his head against the side of the sparkberth. Crasher spit out her siphon hose and smiled, the last few drops of fuel dribbling out the sides of her intakes.

"Shit." Frenzy swore in surprise, straightening up in shock. "Didja see that?"

First Aid nodded, and would have smiled. "Yes. And right on schedule too."

The Mini-Cassette beamed into the sparkberth, "Go on." He prodded. "Do it again." Crasher only reached her arms up to Frenzy, fingers grasping. Then her mouth twisted into a tiny crooked smile, in imitation of her parent. Frenzy watched her until he felt something soft brush against his shoulder. He turned to where First Aid was dangling a chamois by his hand. Frenzy grabbed it from the air and got to work buffing the energon off of his offspring.

"Simonize Frenzy." First Aid reminded, "Head to feet. And if you do it well, you can take her out for a few hours. Fill up some of that free time you've been having since your work assignment's been delayed."

Frenzy froze midshine. "Out?"

"Yes, for a few hours. Don't you think it's about time the rest of the base saw her? I know for a fact they've been driving Ironhide up the wall with questions. In fact, if you want, you can go to the Motor Pool with Ironhide after he gets in from patrol." First Aid gestured to the small case, "This is for you to keep. A present from the medical staff." He opened up the case, which was full of an assortment of small brushes, grease guns, sponges, cans and jars. "A complete cleaning kit in Crasher's size." He tapped on a chart engraved on the inside of the lid, "With a handy guide for you."

Frenzy only glanced at the gift. "Out?" he repeated. "Frag. Like, out with her, alone?"

Nodding, First Aid started laying out the rubbing compound, and the joint solvent, wondering all the while if Frenzy would remember which cleanser to use on which part. "I've got a sensor pack, and a battery pack, all ready for her. The battery pack should be able to feed into her ECA for two or three hours." First Aid patted Frenzy on the shoulder, ignoring the way the Cassetticon shrank away from the touch. "If everything goes well, we might even let you take her home for an overnight in a few days."

"Home? Slag. You mean, to my room?" Frenzy was standing stock still, eyeing Crasher with some trepidation.

"She'll be on med-sensor watch the whole time, of course. Alarms are tied directly to her systems now. And I know that Red Alert has given your room a good security sensor and alarm retrofitting too. So don't worry." First Aid slipped a brush and a solvent can into Frenzy's hands. "She's ready for you to take her home. So show me you're ready to take her."

Frenzy winced and nodded. Then he began spraying the solvent on the top of Crasher's helm, too lost in thought to smile back at the sparkling when she reached for him.

"Frenzy. That's optic cleaner." First Aid sighed.

XXXXXX

The wind rushed over Ironhide's windshield and blew air through the bars on his grill and into his radiator, cooling his hot engine. The pavement rolled satisfyingly under his tires, and he could feel his rolling axles pressed on by his drive train, his motor singing and dipping octaves as his transmission changed gears. Damn, but sometimes it felt good to get out of base and just drive as hard as he could. Stretch out his suspension, work out the kinks and tightness in his crankshaft, put the pedal to the metal and really give his systems a good workout.

A low honking, and a massive shadow passed over Ironhide; a red cab-over semi-truck with no trailer, passing him on the left. "The speed limit is fifty-five here, Ironhide." Prime called out as he pulled in front of him. "Earth gravity getting to you again, old friend?" The Autobot leader was obviously amused.

Ironhide changed gears and increased his speed to keep up with Optimus' back bumper, the larger Autobot's mudflaps waving behind him, taunting the old Vanette. "Old friend, old friend...yer what, ten, twenty years younger 'an me?" Ironhide retorted.

"Hmm...age is a state of mind, _old_ friend." Optimus changed gears and black clouds poured from his smokestacks. "I like to think that I keep a youthful outlook."

"Ya mean a reckless and slaggin' bullheaded, self-sacrificin' outlook." Ironhide mumbled, knowing or hoping that most of his words would be blown behind him in the wind.

"Bullheaded? Really Ironhide?" Optimus chuckled, "I'm not the one who dressed-down a superior officer in front of subordinates, and then went running off into the woods in the middle of the night-without leave, I might add-on a fool's errand."

"Ya knew I'd go after 'im. Ya blasted well knew." Ironhide felt his engine chugging, and sighed as he had to shift up a gear again.

"_Fool's_ errand." Optimus observed, lightly.

"Ha." Ironhide answered dryly. "Ha. Ha." He sped up, so they were only feet apart on the road. "Ya couldn't have known I'd find 'im though." There was a hint of a question in Ironhide's voice.

"No." Prime answered at last. "I didn't think you would find him. But I knew if you didn't, than no one would."

"Hnn." Ironhide slipped back a few feet, losing speed as he became lost in thought.

"How are they?" Prime asked.

"Hmm? The kids? You could visit ya know. The kidda'd let ya see her all ya want. He know's yer the Prime."

"I didn't want to interrupt whatever bonding was going on there."

"Bonding? The kid's already over the moon fer that sparkling." Ironhide chuckled. "He just doesn't know which end is up on 'er yet."

"That isn't exactly what I meant, Ironhide."

Now Ironhide slowed down enough that Prime had to tap his breaks or risk leaving his patrol partner in his dust. Optimus took stock of his surroundings. They were on a fairly empty stretch of road, the desert spread out on either side. It wasn't desolate. Here and there were scrubby trees, patches of grass and weed, tall yucca, and reddish, windblown rock formations. A jackrabbit scurried away into the distance as they passed, scared of the roaring, metal giants. The landscape was sparse, but pretty in its own way. Finally Ironhide slowed to a stop on the sandy, red dirt roadside. With a hiss and a click, he put himself in park, just thinking. He hardly heard Prime's backup warning as he rolled beside his friend.

"Guess I am gettin' old Optimus." Ironhide finally said. "I can't drive and think at the same time anymore." He joked.

"Thinking about?"

"Dangitall Prime, no leadin' questions!" Ironhide was more amused than mad. He knew the Autobot leader too well. "I'm gonna tell ya if ya just give me enough time ta think it out!"

They parked out in the desert. And now that Prime had been reminded to keep quiet, he rather enjoyed the long wordless pause in the conversation. It seemed the discussion continued within the silence, as each of the old mechs mulled over their thoughts.

At last, Ironhide twisted his axles so his wheels were turned to his friend. "You-you ever miss Elita?" There was a pause. "Yeah. Okay. Dumb question." The van sank down on his suspension. "But, ever since this whole thing, I've been... well, missin' Chromia. I mean, actually _missin'_ her. In moments I don' expect to, not just when I bring her ta mind. She's slippin' in where I hadn't had a reason to before. After we got contact from them, when I knew she was still out there, then I could go about my business and not worry. She was doin' what she needed ta do , and I was doin' what I needed ta do, and we both knew that the other was damn good at it too. But..."

Ironhide rolled a little way out into the desert, to get a feel for the dry dirt of Earth under his tires. "This is more than missin' her _now_, ya know, out there." Ironhide finally transformed, turning to Optimus with a thoughtful smile, and then back to red-gold alien vista. "You ever miss things that just mighta been? This damn war's taken so much from us. Ya ever think about where you and Elita might be, if it'd ended five million years ago when things still coulda gone back to the way it was before?"

Prime transformed. "You wanted sparklings." He concluded.

Ironhide gave Optimus a wry grin. "There ya go puttin' words inta my vocalizer." He looked down at his hands, noting every ache from his worn down, corroded, abraded joint casings. He laughed. "Yer, right Prime, I'm _old_. An' if what we wanted to happen when we started out is what was supposed ta happen, then this war stole my life." There was a silence, where Prime bit back every observation that came to him, all this internalized. Because Ironhide's words were true for Optimus too, in some ways even more so.

"But...but, ya know, I'm okay with it." Ironhide continued, "It's just somethin' I think about, just sometimes when I remember how Chromia used to be, and how Cybertron used to be, and how I used ta be. And really that's somethin' I hadn't thought of in a long time. But what we wanted in the beginning isn't always what we get, an I'm luckier than most in that I still got her, even if she's more'an a million miles away."

Prime walked into the desert so he was standing next to his friend, sharing the longing and a regret that refused to find full expression. "I do miss Elita, too," he said finally, and in the simple statement was nine million years of frustrated but undying love. Ironhide patted him on the shoulder.

"Of course ya do, an' worse than I miss Chromia, I know." He looked up into the cloudless blue sky, imagining where the stars would be." You and Elita, Primus, it's like the two of you were built fer each other. An' ya can't tell me you haven't been thinking more on it since the kids came into our lives."

Prime nodded wistfully. "Elita would have made a good creator, a good mother. But some things are just not meant to be." Optimus sighed, and followed Ironhide's gaze to the sky. "We couldn't let ourselves create a sparkling. I—we couldn't bring a new life into such danger. Our child, offspring two of his greatest enemies, would be too tempting of a target for Megatron. He would have done more than attempted to kill it; he would have tried to kidnap and reprogram it."

Ironhide barked a laugh, his optics glittering. "Please tell me that ya see the irony of all this?" he begged. "You couldn't have a kid ya wanted, 'cause of what Megatron might do."

"And now we have his offspring, completely under our protection." Prime turned to his friend. "But it disturbs me to think-however I can't help thinking it may be true-that Megatron would be more likely to allow my offspring to survive than his own.

"What about Megatron isn't distrubin'" Ironhide spat. But then he cracked another smile. "Makes me love that little sparklin' even more, knowing that there isn't one thing that sick fragger wouldn't give to snuff her out. Knowin' every move she makes grinds his gears. She's gettin' stronger, Prime. You should really see her. She's finally comin' ta life." Ironhide played with the scratches on the end of his knuckles, plating squealing under his fingertips as he buffed at scrapes in the finish. Optimus could see that he was chewing over his thoughts.

"But it's more'an just that, Optimus. It's more than just a cute little accidental sparklin' stirring up all kinds of memories or longing. It's the kid himself. It's Frenzy." Ironhide shook his head with a sigh. "I worry 'bout him. Hell, not a day's gone by fer three months I didn't worry 'bout him. But...I'm only just now starting ta get a handle on how much work I got cut out for me. He's been twisted so tight, screwed so bad, some days I don' think I'm ever gonna get him loose. I'm tryin' to get through ta him, but it seems like he just puts up with me. Puts up with life."

Ironhide turned to face Prime completely, reaching out in earnest for advice, for compassion. Not from his leader, but from his oldest friend.

"Ya know, I'm pretty lucky, all things considered. I've still got my spark, plenty of my friends, my...well...my sparkmate. This war took a dream from me, but jus' one possible future. I really can't say the war stole my life, because I look at that kid and the war stole _his_ life, twisted it from the very beginning, took away his innocence, a real family, every natural thing that something young and growin' should have. An' Megatron and this damn war took from Frenzy everythin' he coulda been without it. An' he coulda _been_ something, Optimus."

Ironhide's sad face twisted into determined anger, and he punched his fist into his palm. "Damnit he _is_ somethin'! He cared that they were gonna terminate his sparklin', he cared despite every soul-suckin', disastrous, murderous thing they'd turned his life into. There's somethin' there that made him do that. He can't be gone past repair."

"No one's saying he's past repair, Ironhide."

"No Optimus, _you're_ not sayin' he's past repair. I've heard the whispers from the crew though, and there are 'Bots just waitin' for the inevitable snap that comes with pushing too hard at a processor programmed fer selfish bloodlust from the very beginning. And dammit, I've felt it in my spark; right now, they're right. There's a nightmare sleepin' in that kid's processor, and it's either gonna wake up angry or he's gonna run from it right back to the Decepticons. But I can't give up on him, I've got to get through because there is _somethin'_ there. Somethin' there worth savin' that I've got to save."

"I know, Ironhide." Prime nodded, hand on his friend's back."I agree. But why haven't you told me this before?"

"I didn't think we'd get this far." Ironhide gave Optimus a wan smile. "And I guess part of me's been hoping he'd settle in, and I mean really settle in, despite my fears. I'll admit to you Optimus, if you promise not ta tell, each day that goes by I'm a little more scared a' what'll happen when Frenzy goes lookin' for himself on his own. "

Optimus gripped Ironhide's shoulder, offering support. "You have a gentle spark, old friend. I've always known. But you used to hide it behind bluster and brusqueness, and your patience is something you've had to cultivate. I think you see in Frenzy a reflection of yourself."

"Thanks." Ironhide cut in sarcastically.

"I'm being serious, Ironhide. You are what you were meant to be. And if anyone can find Frenzy, it's you."

XXX

Crasher could tell something was up. She seemed to sense the tension radiating off of her parent, and she keyed into it instantly, whining and flailing in Frenzy's arm, threatening to knock the magnetic battery pack off of her back.

Frenzy jostled her upright against his chest, still stiff and awkward holding his sparkling. "I don't know about this..." he muttered to the floor, inching away from the Med Bay doors.

"Now look Frenzy," Ironhide coaxed, "I know it isn't any'a their business, but mosta those 'Bots out there 've been drivin' themselves nuts waitin' ta see her. "

Frenzy frowned. "What if I don't fraggin' _want_ them ta see her, huh? I don't want a buncha Autobots pawing at her."

Ironhide sighed, face in his palm. "I didn' say ya had ta pass her around, though Primus knows they'll all want ta get a peek. It's nothing _personal_, kid. They just wanna see a cute little sparklin' is all. They ain't seen one in years and years, so don't take it personal if they go a little...mushy."

"Slag. Now I _really_ don't wanna go." Frenzy took a seat next to the support berth and readjusted the sensor pack on Crasher's chest. She was already getting tired of the pestering, and let Frenzy know with an obstinate wail. "Shut it Crash," he growled at her.

Ironhide walked over to the chair and squatted down next to it. "Kid, I know ya don' wanna do this, but ya know ya gotta get some practice with 'er outta Med Bay. You wanna take her home eventually, right?"

Frenzy shrugged, making a show of examining the battery pack feeding a constant stream of energy into his microsized sparkling.

Biting back frustration, Ironhide scraped up a bit more patience, "Just for a few hours, okay kid? Two hours at the Motor Pool, ta get 'em offa _my_ back."

"Fine." Frenzy sighed, gathering Crasher up again. He slid off the chair and moved reluctantly for the door. "I'll give you an hour."

Ironhide clenched his fist, gritting his dentals. _Damn kid._ "Fine," he hissed, following the former Cassetticon out of the Med Bay.

Truth was: it _was_ starting to get 'personal' out there. The few bots who had managed to get themselves admitted to Med Bay since Crasher's delivery, as well as those who had bribed or cajoled the medical staff, had started up a flurry of rumors surrounding the Decepticon-bred sparkling. Rumors mostly derived from a reductive analysis of conformation and color scheme. Now that the shadow of death no longer lingered over the mysterious arrivals, gossip had finally turned to the who, and the how, of the sparkling's origin; speculation too juicy to give up whispering about. Ironhide was determined to end it, quickly, and this was the best way he knew how.

As they entered the Motor Pool, Ironhide watched as the optics of the handful of 'Bots inside instantly flitted to little red, black, and gunmetal grey Crasher nestling into Frenzy's arms. And he watched as one by one realization dawned in their eyes. It stung Ironhide's spark to see the sideways, knowing glances from 'Bot to 'Bot and the sudden palpable appearance of pity directed at the parent and child. He resisted the urge to put his hand protectively on Frenzy's shoulder. Because, as of yet, Frenzy was oblivious to it. The trio wandered over to the TV and found some empty seats; Frenzy adjusting and readjusting Crasher's battery pack. He was trying so hard to remember exactly how he needed to hold her, adjust her, soothe her, distract her, that he was too distracted to see anyone else.

Ironhide had expected Bumblebee to be the first greeter, but he was wrong. The kindhearted, infinitely innocent Bumblebee stared at Crasher for only a moment, then turned away so no one could see the troubled expression he couldn't mask. The Autobot scout remained reflecting at his table. The first greeter was, in fact, Huffer, who acted the same as always, either oblivious to any train of thought stemming from Crasher's color and appearance, or so pessimistic as to have expected just as much the entire time.

"Oh, I see you brought the sparkling, finally." Huffer walked up, brazenly, standing between Ironhide's chair and Frenzy's bench; not even attempting to hide his obvious interest in the infant. "I figured you might since you'd have some free time now that Beachcomber has found new reasons to postpone demolitions. As long as she didn't break down again, obviously." Frenzy looked up at the Engineer blankly, and Ironhide shook his head hopelessly. Huffer was undaunted.

"Well I guess it's just going to take us even longer now to get the demolitions done." He complained. "As if it hadn't taken long enough already. And did they ask my advice for whatever new formation they've found? Ohh nooo." While Huffer continued his almost automated whining he leaned into Crasher who gazed at him with a sort of tired curiosity. A rare smile crossed the dour construction expert's faceplates, and he reached out to Crasher with a squat, purple digit. The sparkling grabbed for it.

"Look at that; and she was almost offline a couple weeks ago. I guess she's getting more resilient, all things considered." Huffer admitted. "It's Crasher right?" Frenzy nodded. "Of course, no telling how long she'll need the battery pack. Keep her on sensor watch, all the time, I've heard all kinds of stories of sparklings taking a bad turn when there's no one watching." Huffer frowned at the sparkling, causing her to frown back and whimper.

Frenzy pulled Crasher away, shifting her to his other knee, and Huffer became genuinely disappointed. Bumblebee had managed to gather himself together, and walked from one of the tables to the benches by the TV.

"Heya, Frenzy! Ironhide! How's it going today?" He smiled beatifically and slipped into his pleasantries, with only the occasional crack in his facade showing his deep unease.

"Peachy." Frenzy dug around for the remote while Crasher twisted her neck to get a look at the new Autobot. She squealed and reached out for the yellow scout when she saw him.

Ironhide laughed. "Now that, that doesn' surprise me in the least." Ironhide smirked. "Frenzy! Look at'er lookin' at Bumblebee."

Frenzy twisted Crasher around on his knee so she could get a good look at the Autobot Mini-car. Bumblebee smiled at the sparkling watching him with rapt attention. "Now here's someone I've been waiting to meet for a long time." He leaned in, talking to the sparkling. "Crasher. Nice ta meet you! I've heard a lot about you, you know. "

Frenzy did his best to smile back at Bumblebee, and even threw his thoughts around looking for some small talk. But his processor was consumed by the uncomfortable proximity of Crasher to himself. There were too many other 'Bots around for him to be holding her as close as he needed to. Half-a-dozen sets of blue optics were burrowing their way into the plating on his hands, now resting lighter and lighter on his sparkling's chassis. He finally found the remote with his other hand. It was huge; designed to be big enough for even the Dinobots to manipulate easily.

"Anything good on this time of day?" He asked, holding the oversized Motor Pool remote in both hands. Crasher reached out, pressing the volume buttons, and Frenzy yanked it out of her reach. She protested with a high-pitched whine while Frenzy fumbled with both remote and sparkling. Ironhide leaned over to his charge, holding his hand out. He was more than a little surprised when Frenzy slid Crasher into the open palm so the Cassetticon could hold the remote in one hand and channel surf in the other.

"Uh, Afternoon News with Ramirez in on in ten minutes. _Growing Pains_ is almost halfway over." Bumblebee answered, leaning back and grinning at Ironhide's confused expression.

"Bonanza?" Frenzy asked hopefully.

"Bonanza?" Bumblebee shrugged. "I don't know, I've never seen it."

Frenzy looked over at Bumblebee, open-mouthed, dumbfounded.

Bumblebee smiled, uncomfortable, "Fresh Prince of—"

"No. Hell. No." Frenzy pressed his thumb over the channel button and left it there, watching the screen flicker.

"Oh! Oh That! That! Donahue!" The voice came from behind the seats around the TV, Frenzy turned to see a short red Minibot jabbing at the screen enthusiastically.

"Donahue!" Cliffjumper insisted. "You'll love it! Once, they threw _chairs_!"

Frenzy stared skeptically at the seated humans talking in the TV studio. "'My secret lover'?" He read out loud the text box at the bottom of the screen.

"That one! Yes!" Cliffjumper took a seat next to Bumblebee, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. "Humans have the most ridiculous problems!"

Ironhide wasn't watching the show, absorbed by the tiny life cupped in his hand. Crasher fit right in the center of Ironhide's palm. He held her close to his windshield, curling his thumb next to her to secure her. She reached out to grab the dark grey thumb, pulling herself alongside it and hugging it. She managed to get her mouth around the very end of the digit and started gnawing on it with her sharp little dental plating; and he smiled at her. "Go ahead kiddo, I gotta enough scratches and dings on my fingers, what's one more." She looked up toward the low drawl of his voice, curious. Ironhide felt a hand on his shoulder.

"So _this_ is the little lady." Jazz grinned crouching at Ironhide's hip. "Gotta say Ironhide, I think every mech in the room's gotta green paintjob seein' you gettin' to hold her first."

"Really? Took you a while ta get over here." Ironhide mumbled, and there was a flicker on Jazz's faceplates, but it was just as quickly gone.

"Aww. I just didn't wanna slip in on Huffer's game." He laughed, a rich braying sound that sent Crasher into a fit of excited squeals. She reached up for the black and white Porsche. Jazz laughed again at her grin, and held his hand out for her to grasp. "So you like that, huh, little lady? If ya already like laughing at Huffer then I approve of your sense of taste." Jazz shook his head. "Man, it's been a long time since I seen a sparkling...forget how they just sink in, right under the platin'." He wagged a finger at Crasher, who watched it with rapt attention. "Right to the spark, baby, ya hear me? I can dodge laser fire an' grenades, but you shot right to the spark."

Hound sidled up beside Jazz, murmuring agreement. "She's beautiful. Why, I've never seen one that _small_. And she's so...alive." Bluestreak peeked around from behind the green Jeep, for once in his life shocked speechless being unexpectedly in the presence of the worst and best things in the universe somehow combined into a tiny ball of metal chewing contentedly on Ironhide's thumb.

Ironhide and Frenzy shared a glance. Frenzy just shrugged, nonverbally giving Ironhide permission to entertain, and relaxed into the bench to enjoy the show with the two mini-bots; content that everyone in the room was ignoring him and paying attention to Ironhide holding Crasher. In no time at all the pair had gathered a small enthusiastic crowd, who watched commenting, often nonsensically, on any and every move the tiny sparkling made in Ironhide's hands.

The doors to the Motor Pool hissed open, and Jazz turned to greet the newcomer. "Blaster, my man! Get over here! Meet and greet tha new arrival!" Blaster paused in the doorway, shocked. Then joined the mech waving him over. Ironhide held Crasher up slightly, protectively hovering one hand next to the one holding her. Blaster leaned down over her, his face slipping from a grin to a troubled frown, as he processed an assault of unexpected information, and then quickly his plates went back to a grin.

"We'll hey there, lil' bit byte. Gotta say, it's totally a treat ta meet you, finally. Nice that you're out and about, gettin' some play-time." Blaster's chest rattled impatiently, and with a sideways glance a Frenzy, who was staring him down, he hissed down at his tape deck. "Later guys." His chest began practically vibrating, and from within came tinny shouts of protest. Putting one hand over his chest did nothing to prevent the casing from falling open, and his chest vomited up an entire menagerie of cassettes who transformed as they fell to the floor, gathering in a tight circle around Ironhide's knees.

"Eject!" Blaster yelped. "You need your audials adjusted?"

"Hey! Don't call this foul on me!" The light-blue and orange-faced, bipedal Minicassette protested. "It was _Rewind_ who ran this play!"

The other bipedal Minicassette, who was grey with a red face behind his mouthplate, was mumbling to himself. "Last recorded Autobot Sparkling was two hundred and fifty years ago on the colony on Velocitron. Last sighting of a Decepticon sparkling by Autobots, three and a half million years ago, on Cybertron." Rewind had both hands on Ironhide's knee, craning his neck to get a better look as he recited the information to himself. Ironhide looked down and lowered Crasher to the young Cassettibot who smiled. "Last recorded microsized sparkling delivered alive: five hundred years ago, onboard the Axiom." He thrust a thumb at his brother. "This punk." He craned his head to the side, thinking. "Last recorded delivery of a microsized sparkling from a microsized adult: Four point five million years ago. Last recorded delivery of a microsized sparkling from a microsized mech? Hmmm... I know it's in my datatracks somewhere." Crasher grinned at Rewind and Eject standing next to each other at the side of the chair. Steeljaw and Ramhorn contented themselves with getting a good long look in silence.

Eject, of course, hadn't heard one word of Rewind's litany of factoids. He was too busy waving his finger in front of Crasher's visor, noting how quickly she followed it. He nodded. "Reflexes are on par!" He began talking exuberantly at the sparkling. "She's got running back written all over her. Oh man, we get a couple more in our sizes and we can put together some sweet football games in a few years."

"You played with the Dinobots, just a couple months ago." Hound reminded them.

"_Touch_ football, Hound. Not tackle football!" Eject sniffed mournfully. "They don't let _us_ play tackle with the Dinobots."

The tight circle that had formed around Ironhide kept him from getting a clear view of Frenzy, and the Autobot was distracted making sure that none of the overeager Autobots got too close to the still fragile sparkling. He didn't notice the agitation building in the young mech on the bench.

"Frenzy?" Bumblebee asked, softly. "You okay?"

Frenzy's head kept darting from the TV to the new crowd. He would snap his optics back to the screen like he was planning on gluing them there forever, but every few minutes his gaze would wander to Ironhide, Crasher, and their audience. He gripped the remote tightly, and after one neck-strut-wrenching twist back to the TV he unconsciously adjusted his grip so he was pressing the channel button. Cliffjumper yelped his protest as Frenzy flipped through stations for a few seconds before he could ease up enough to stop on the News with Ramirez. He flung the remote to Cliffjumper, clearly seething in rage as potent as it was mysterious. Cliffjumper grabbed for the remote, too intent on getting back to the right channel in time to see the conclusion of a fleshie yelling match to get angry.

Bumblebee posited his question again. "Frenzy? You okay?" Frenzy shrugged and stared at his shuffling feet, crossing and recrossing his arms anxiously. Finally he stood, and, head still slung low, he pressed his way to Ironhide's side, ignoring the glances and gazes of the other Autobots in the room.

"It's time to go." Frenzy grumbled, fists clenched at his side, avoiding looking at the other Minicassettes standing only a few feet away from him.

"Ya tol' me we were gonna stay an hour. Remember, kid?" Ironhide reminded, grinning nervously. Eject and Rewind were tugging on Blaster's arms insistently.

"Frenzy." Blaster began with a thin smile, "This is Rewind and Eject." He put his hands on the two Cassettibot's shoulders.

They nodded enthusiatically and Rewind took a step forward, hand out in greeting, "Ba-Weep—"

"Shut up!" Frenzy snapped at them bitterly and then stood there fuming.

"Told you, ya should have offered him the goodie first." Eject whispered into his brother's audial. The rest of the Autobots were shocked into silence, most quickly fading away as quickly as they'd come.

"Come on little guys, I know it's time to go." Blaster gently gripped his charges' arms and pulled them away, Steeljaw and Ramhorn padding along behind as the group left the Motor Pool completely.

"Bye Frenzy!" Rewind called out, not quite whipped enough to lose all hope of quickly making friends.

"It's time, to _go_." Frenzy growled. Ironhide couldn't hide his disappointment any more than Frenzy could hide his anxious rage. The big mech sighed and held Crasher out to the Cassetticon. Frenzy shook his head sharply. "No." He choked on the word.

"Frenzy?" There was an extra dose of concern in Ironhide's voice. He held out Crasher again, she whined, reaching for her parent with one tired arm.

"I _said_-!" Frenzy bit back his shout, "No." he hissed, turning his head to look at the floor. "We fraggin' need to go. _Now_."

Ironhide stood, Crasher still in his hands and nodding off while whimpering. Every optic in the room followed them in silence as they left, and even before the doors hissed shut behind them the Autobots were moving into tight clots of gossip.

As the doors closed Frenzy pointed down the hall as he headed in the other direction. "Take her back." Frenzy growled. "Take her back to Med Bay."

"And what about—"

"Dammit! Don't slaggin' _worry_ about me!" Frenzy barked as he marched in the direction of the ship's quarters. Ironhide looked down at the infant in his hands, then up at the rapidly departing Frenzy, and then toward the closed Motor Pool doors.

With a resigned sigh that encompassed his heart, soul, and mind; he calmly followed after Frenzy. The gentle, methodical, tromping of his feet against the floor-plating lulled the sleepy Crasher into recharge. Ironhide was far enough behind that Frenzy didn't notice the mech following him; and by the time the Autobot had reached the door to Frenzy's quarters it was already shut. Curling the sleeping sparkling next to his chest carefully, Ironhide gently rapped at the door.

An almost feral growl issued from inside. "Go away!"

Ironhide waited a moment. Then entered the room.

Frenzy was sitting slumped at his workstation. His hands were clutching at the finials on the sides of his bowed head. At Ironhide's entry Frenzy slammed his hands on the workstation, seething.

"I told you to stay the fuck out!" Frenzy growled.

Ironhide froze, any real plans of directly confronting Frenzy abandoned when he saw the ticking time bomb of rage in front of him. "I jus' thought we could do somethin' else," he stammered, and some dark part of him winced at his words. "I mean, is there anywhere else on base ya wanna go?"

Frenzy stood and marched over to the mech. "I _wanna_ be left the frag alone!" he gnashed, and pointed for the door. "Get _out_!"

"Ya can't stay in here all day." Ironhide was pleading, but he didn't care. "Jus' come back ta the Med Bay with me."

"Hell no! If I have to see that Primus slaggin' Med Bay one more time...!" Frenzy hissed.

"Frenzy...come on." Ironhide coaxed, like trying to soothe a hurricane. "Jus', jus' calm down for an astrosecond."

"Fuck! Don't you think I'm _trying_!" Frenzy howled. Then his fists clenched and he howled, "Dammit! Just. Get. _Out_!" He charged at Ironhide, as if to force him from the room.

Ironhide's optics flared in fear, and he backed up a few hasty steps. "Now, watch it!" He shouted. "I got Crash here!" Crasher, jostled awake by Ironhide's retreat, chose that second to let out a mournful wail.

The Minicassette stopped dead in his tracks; then turned to the wall, marching over to punch the metal hard enough that Ironhide heard a sickening crunch beneath the bang of the bulkhead. "I told you to take her back." Frenzy hissed between his dentals. His head dropped. His arms dropped. He stood limp and defeated.

"Go." Frenzy begged, voice haggard. "Please. Take her back, she needs to go back. Take her out." His fists clenched and unclenched, and a tiny drop of energon dripped from a dented knuckle onto the floor. Tense as a tripwire, time crept past them for nearly a minute. The only sounds coming from the distressed sparkling.

Ironhide rubbed his thumb across the whimpering Crasher's back, and sent a panicked prayer upwards for patience, wisdom; hell, anything that Primus would give him at this point. He knelt down, an immovable object, but far enough away that he hoped the gesture made him seem vulnerable rather than threatening. And he held Crasher away from himself, cupping her in both hands. And she began to cry.

Frenzy turned at the sound. Ironhide could see him choking down rage, biting back shouts as he stood stock still and looked at Ironhide holding out Crasher. Eventually Frenzy wandered, trancelike, over to the extended hands. The pathetic, exhausted crying of the sparkling serving as a siren song. He stood next to Ironhide, looking at his sparkling wailing hysterically, nestled safely in those massive grey hands. Frenzy watched so long that Ironhide considered offering the sparkling to him, but the old, red mech was terrified of breaking whatever tenuous peace Frenzy had managed to grasp.

Finally Frenzy shuddered, and Ironhide braced himself to leap to his feet. But Frenzy wiped his hands over his visor, and with visible resignation gathered Crasher up from Ironhide's hands and curled her close to his chest.

Ironhide sighed, and rubbed at his own optics, sitting down on the floor completely. Frenzy took two steps toward his berth, but with a backwards glance at Ironhide and a barely perceptible twitch he instead shuffled back to his workstation. His head was buried close to Crasher, comforting the sparkling who had stopped crying almost the second he'd taken her up. Again, silence reigned in the room, this time less tense and more tired.

"Frenzy, I'm sorry." Ironhide said, finally, "I didn' know that Blaster an' his cassettes were gonna be in there." Ironhide had put two and two together. It wasn't exactly astroscience.

"I don't wanna see them again." Frenzy muttered. But added, more thoughtfully, "Not for a while."

"Ya wanna tell me what happened?"

"No." Frenzy mumbled into Crasher's helm. Ironhide realized the former Decepticon was kissing the top of it and he had to look away.

"Think ya can tell me anyway?"

"I didn't like seein' them." Frenzy stated, flatly. "I didn't like seein' them together. Slag, you know I left Rumble _behind_?" Frenzy winced. "Rumble _never_ woulda left me behind."

"You did what you _had_ to do, kid. For yourself, for her." Frenzy shook his head, leaning a cheek on Crasher's crest. "Is that why ya got so worked up?" Ironhide asked, tiptoeing on eggshells, "Because of Rumble?"

"If I say 'yes' will you leave me the frag alone?"

"Would ya be lyin'?"

Frenzy sighed, pulling away from Crasher. "Slag. I guess...well...recharging's been a glitch lately," he admitted. "I keep seeing things, you know, in my slaggin processor. Things I don't fuckin' wanna remember. I donno. It wasn't like this before. I could fraggin' make myself shut it down before, and now it pisses me the Pit off. I'm so fuckin' mad I can't even think."

"Memory Core glitches." Ironhide nodded, "I know those aren't fun."

Frenzy frowned, "You get 'em?"

"Kid, I've lived through a _war_. An' anybot who's seen even half of what war is, is gonna have more than a few sleepless nights over it. Horror sticks with ya, because neither yer spark or yer processor can make sense of it. But it keeps tryin' to."

"Shit. You mean I'm stuck with it?" A thread of panic got caught in Frenzy's voice.

"No." Ironhide was quick to soothe again. "No kid, it gets better. That's why you're talking with Hoist and First Aid, they'll get a hold of it." Ironhide stood up, brushing off his knee joints. "Look, we _do_ need ta get the kiddo back to Med Bay now. And then we can just chill. Why don' we jus' relax? Here, in Med Bay, wherever. It's been weeks since we got some Bonanza in. We'll take the kiddo back, and watch some Bonanza in the Med Bay, sneak some oil for yer hand, and turn up the volume real loud. I know that'll piss Ratch and First Aid off. Okay?"

Frenzy thought for a moment and then nodded, standing from his workstation still clutching Crasher to him closely. Ironhide let him exit first, and then hit the lights. As luck would have it, he didn't hit the right switch. The brown walls flickered and then faded away, the holographic wallpaper disappearing revealing the real orange metal walls.

Ironhide winced at the sight and flicked the holograph back on and the lights off, letting the door shut behind him. The old Autobot followed his charges down the hall on instinct alone, because all he could see in his processor was the scratched, orange metal walls of Frenzy's quarters, ringed all the way around with dozens and dozens of pink stained dents.


	31. Chapter 31

Ironhide didn't know that male humans could scream in that pitch.

He managed to drag the stalled vehicle back just as the overpass gave way. Multi-ton slabs of concrete and shattered rebar came crashing down on the pavement below, sending up a cloud of grey dust. Through the dust Ironhide could see the Insecticon clones of Kickback fly over to the next bridge, already gnawing away the steel I-beams supporting the roadway. Gritting his dentals, he quickly pulled his hands from where they'd gotten tangled in the station wagon's back bumper and rounded over to the driver's side door. He wiped the dust off the window to reveal the terrified face of a human man, still gripping the steering wheel in white-knuckled panic.

"Don' worry fella," Ironhide rumbled as he dug his fingers into the door panel. "Ah'll get ya outta there."

The man merely pointed in terror through the windshield, his cracked lips open in an expression of stupid amazement. Ironhide looked just in time to see a clone of Shrapnel begin peeling the hood off of the olive green wagon, taking huge bites out of the metal as it started pulling the car back toward the ruined overpass and nearer to the main swarm of Insecticons.

Ironhide charged the clone. With one hand he gave it a vicious punch that left knuckle-sized dents and sent the robotic insect flying. Ironhide's other hand shot out a stream of molten lead over the stunned Decepticon. It screetched and writhed as the hot metal fused it to the pavement, unable to escape. When Ironhide finally shut off the stream there was only a lump of red hot slag where the clone had been.

He smirked as he turned back to the car, but the man had managed to crawl out the hatchback and escape. This was fortunate, since before Ironhide could turn around he felt several sets of pinchers clamp onto his legs, dragging him down struggling beneath a swarm of clones.

Ironhide swung wildly at his attackers, hoping that some back-up wasn't too far behind. _Damn Decepticons,_ he thought. _This day can't get much worse_.

XXXXX

Five grueling hours later, circumstances had proven to Ironhide that the day certainly could, and indeed had, gotten worse. Inwardly he punched his processor for tempting fate. Outwardly he glowered at the conference table in front of him, wishing that there was someone in the room to back him up, or that he'd been given more than five minutes between getting back and getting his 'even-worse' news.

"I can't believe that we are actually considering going through with this. Tonight of all nights." Red Alert was standing because he couldn't force himself to sit. For once Ironhide couldn't blame him. The security director paced around the circumference of the conference table, and the two other mechs in the room stiffened as he passed behind them. The very air around Red was charged with his anxiety.

Prowl put off answering Red, and turned to Ironhide. "Have you gotten the chance to talk to him?"

"Hell no." Ironhide tightened a bolt on the metal brace welded around his right elbow, gritting his dentals as another stab of burning pain from the joint overwhelmed his sensor net. "I jus' got back. The 'Cons weren't foolin' around today. Hotspot an' tha other Protectobots are still diggin' survivors outta the rubble." Ironhide leaned his good elbow on the table, and rested his head wearily in his hands. "Kid still in the brig?"

Prowl nodded, glancing at Red Alert. "He's been pretty quiet since it happened."

"An' Sideswipe?"

"Also in the brig, a few cells down."

"Ratch still in Med Bay? He was patchin' up Skyfire when I left."

"Yes." Prowl slid a datapad across the table. "And so is Hoist. The injured are still trickling in from the city." He gestured to the datapad. "My report on the incident. I questioned Frenzy, Sideswipe, Brawn and the others; but Prime said to wait until you got back to do anything further."

Ironhide picked up the datapad, thumbing through it listlessly. "What's tha point'a even havin' a council meeting now if half the council is MIA?"

"My thoughts exactly." Red Alert cut in.

Prowl drummed his fingers on the tabletop thoughtfully. "We'll get the opinions of the others later. And I already know _your_ opinion, Red Alert." He said pointedly. Red Alert huffed, but kept clamped. "To be honest, it was Prime who suggested that we consider going ahead with our plans for tonight. If Ironhide agrees, that is."

Ironhide sighed, rubbing at the aching struts in his neck with a hand that still felt numb and bent from swatting at Insecticon clones all afternoon. "What the Pit happened today?" He asked.

Prowl smiled humorlessly. "Was that a rhetorical question, Ironhide?"

Ironhide stood up, datapad in his good hand, "Ta you? Yeah." The boxy red mech headed for the door, cutting off the protests of Red Alert with a hard stare.

"I'll give ya my opinion in an hour." Ironhide declared, and the door shut behind him.

Red Alert's entire body tensed as he prepared to jump into an impassioned diatribe. Prowl quietly gathered his things, and without looking at the Lamborghini raised a hand to silence him at his first word.

"My opinion goes with Ironhide's. Whatever he decides." Prowl informed, firm and calm. He smiled benignly and left the conference room.

Red Alert sighed, and slumped back in his chair. "Of course it does." He muttered to himself. "Valid concerns. I have _valid_ concerns. " Remotely he pinged the security systems on the Med Bay. It had become habit for him, making sure the room where Frenzy's sparking slept was secure.

Sparklings had always made Red Alert nervous, and the few he remembered from Cybertron had been equally uncomfortable in _his_ presence. A few days ago, when he was installing extra security cameras in Med Bay again, Red's operating system had nearly locked up when Ratchet has suggested on a whim that Red hold Crasher. He'd declined, firmly, sensor horns flashing much to Ratchet's amusement. Sparklings, and especially _this_ sparkling, were for watchfully guarding. Preferably from across the room. Which Red Alert did as often as his duties would let him.

Because despite any discomfort, he would protect this sparkling no matter what it took, from anyone, Lazerbeak, Ratbat, Megatron, Frenzy.

And especially from Frenzy. Especially if no one else was willing to see the danger. After all, it was Red Alert's _job_.

XXXXXXXXXXX

He half expected to panic at any minute and work up a literal frenzy in anticipation. But all Frenzy felt as he sat slumped in the cell was resignation. And shame. He realized that he'd been expecting something like this, sooner or later. After all, he was still a Decepticon at spark.

His fate too horrible to imagine, he distracted himself with dusty memories. It was a strange memory Frenzy had playing in his processor while he sat in the brig and waited for judgment. A strange memory, but hardly the most unpleasant he'd had to endure over the last few weeks, as his memory core had tried to sort itself out. The memory made him feel painfully out of place. But that was better than the very _in place_ feeling of dreading the inevitable punishment. He didn't know why the brig affected him so. Maybe being in the small room, with the dents still on one wall, reminded him of how things had stood when he'd been here last.

When he'd left this room hardly more than a month ago, not returning to the Decepticons hadn't occurred to him, he hadn't confessed the parentage of his sparkling to the Autobots, and he hadn't let himself entertain for more than a few moments even _having_ his sparkling. He'd been fully a Decepticon, in and out, when he'd been here last. He'd still had high hopes that Soundwave would come charging in to rescue him.

It was Soundwave Frenzy was thinking of. Tall silent Soundwave, who'd never spoken except to issue orders, and yet always managed to communicate so much. Frenzy understood now how much he missed him. Not like Rumble who he missed constantly and consciously, but in a deeper more instinctual way; like a frightened animal misses a hidey-hole.

Frenzy was compulsively transforming his piledrivers in and out of his arms, just to feel the rushing tickling sensation of dozens of servos and hydraulics coming to life, making his arms into weapons, and making him powerful. Those pile-drivers- they'd been his go-to tool; more than a weapon of choice, an integral part of who he was. Blasters and pistols were fine, but to actually feel a part of your body become a deadly weapon. To go from powerless to dangerous with a flick of the wrist. That was more than empowering. It was intoxicating.

He remembered getting his pile-drivers installed. It was a memory that had never been walled away, forgotten or hidden. Instead it had been treasured. A single, clear, moment of joy.

How long it had been since Darkmount? Frenzy was not sure. He was nearly at physical maturity since he'd scanned his first altmode: a data-cartridge. And he couldn't forget how Rumble had beat him to it by more than a few cycles. Soundwave had been training them hard, when he had the time, taking special care of Frenzy's training because he was slower learning.

During combat, even simulations, the battle-fury in Frenzy made it hard enough to think let alone listen to instructions. Soundwave's cool, grim reprimands were drilled indelibly in Frenzy's processor, but it seemed he made a mistake during every simulation, every assignment. So it had been a moment of pride for Frenzy when both he and Rumble were given their pile-drivers at the same time, the same day.

Soundwave was standing above the surgical berth as Frenzy came back online. The tall mech was calm as always; a large, dark outline in the brightly lit upgrade facility. Instantly Frenzy could feel the difference in his forearms; the powerful pistons, the added plates, giving his scrawny arms heft even while they were 'normal'. Soundwave put a hand on Frenzy's back as he sat up, and then took one limp black arm into his massive blue hand, scanning it while the young Decepticon twitched his fingers experimentally.

"Can I do it now, boss?" Frenzy had asked, practically falling over in anticipation when his guardian had nodded.

"Try Frenzy. Focus." Soundwave had prompted. "Listen within."

Frenzy had screwed up his face in concentration, accessing new programming, and felt the rush of triumph when his hands had slipped away, replaced with dangerous, deadly bludgeons.

"Good." Soundwave had droned, then pointed to the empty berth next to them. "Use them."

Grinning, Frenzy had paced over to the tall medical bed and raised the pile driver. But he could only bat at the table ineffectually, no harder than he could hit before.

"Frenzy." Soundwave's voice was hard. "Listen _within_."

Frenzy tried his best to concentrate again, and at once the programming came to him, powerful pistons in his forearms waking. The pile drivers sang out as he slammed into the Med Berth which crumpled and screeched beneath his pounding arms. Soon it was nothing but a hunk of dented, sparking slag.

"Good." Soundwave had intoned, and Frenzy had _heard_ that he meant it. Frenzy turned to look up at the taciturn blue mech, and Soundwave had nodded to Frenzy and then gave him exactly one pat on the head as he passed, gesturing for Frenzy to follow him.

That had been a great day. Later, the training range in the Decepticon fortress had echoed with Rumble and Frenzy's gleeful cries as they'd pounded target after target into scrap. When they'd learned how to create the ground-shaking earthquakes that went on to become their signature move Frenzy could have sworn he saw Soundwave perk up with pride. They'd spent cycles, hours out of the box that day, and when Soundwave beckoned them back into his cartridge deck for once the exhausted young Decepticons hadn't resented him for it.

That had been the first day that Frenzy had known that he could be _useful_, and so could earn at least a little respect. And Soundwave had been proud of them.

The cell's wall whirred and hissed, pulling Frenzy out of his reverie. To his surprise the energy bars on the cell hadn't been activated, so the entire wall lifted away revealing Ironhide and nothing more. Frenzy sat frozen, waiting for the hammer to fall. _They're gonna take Crasher away from me and they're gonna send her somewhere else just like that slaggin' autofragger said._

Ironhide scrutinized the petrified former 'Con from helm to foot before waving Frenzy out of the cell with his good arm. "Come on." He called; his voice gruff and tired. The boxy red Autobot started walking down the hall and after a moment's hesitation Frenzy jogged to catch up with him, not wanting to be out of the brig _without_ Ironhide a couple feet away. By now all rest of the Autobots had to know what he had done. Ironhide measured his stride, so Frenzy only had to take a couple steps for each of Ironhide's. Reaching over the old mech adjusted the support struts bracing his elbow again.

"Where are we going?" Frenzy peeped.

"I got work ta do, an yer gonna help. Energon needs processed from tha power station an' Gears is tied up in the city, so we're gonna do it."

They walked along in silence, the hallways blessedly empty this deep in the base. Finally they rounded the corner on Hanger Deck C. Ironhide keyed the door open and waved Frenzy inside.

The large hanger was stuffed with massive, equipment, and buzzing with electrical noises. The air was overpowering with the smell of sulfur, an unfortunate side-effect of the cable lines running electricity from the generators deep in the volcano's caverns. A small stack of energon sat in the corner, and against another wall was an electrical switchboard and massive batteries. The other walls were lined with huge energon generators.

Frenzy stood idly by while Ironhide fumbled at the switchboard, struggling to do the necessary hookups one-handed. Looming in the sulfurous air were the day's unfortunate events, but Frenzy didn't feel it was his place to bring them up. Just like a demolitions expert would not feel it was his place to step on his own explosive.

"Are—are you okay?" Frenzy asked meekly. "That looks like it hurts."

Ironhide grunted. "Blew out the U-joint. Didn' know it 'till I got back. From tha grit I got grindin' in it I musta chewed up some servos."

"Bad fight?"

Looking down at Frenzy, Ironhide shrugged. "Yeah, musta been." He nodded over to the first generator as it started spitting out iridescent pink cubes of energon, "Bad enough that I kept swingin' even after I felt the elbow go. But they're backed-up in the Med Bay right now. No Transformer fatalities yet, either side, but those Insecticons know how ta make a mess."

Frenzy nodded, scooping up a cube of energon and carrying it over to the pile. He looked up at Ironhide. The red mech set up the hook-ups to the next generator; then he turned to the younger mech. "Yeah, stack 'em up there. Then we gotta load up the tanks that go tah the Re-Fuels."

They worked in silence for a while, stacking cubes neatly in the corner as soon as the energon generators pushed them out. Soon, some of the tension had eased from the air. Frenzy relaxed as he did something useful and quiet; and it wasn't until Frenzy's mind was completely absorbed in his task that Ironhide spoke. His voice was tired but easy.

"Tell me what happened today." he asked. He kept on carrying cubes in his good arm to the pile as he spoke, and made no signs of stopping.

Frenzy froze, but Ironhide motioned for him to continue. Frenzy carried over another energy-filled cube tingling against his arms and chest, stacking it carefully. "I got in a fight." He mumbled.

"I knew that." Ironhide's voice was still even, betraying no judgment. "I read half a dozen reports on it already. But I want _you_ ta tell me."

Frenzy nodded, forlorn, walking back to the generator for the next cube. "Sure," he sighed, "Whatever you want."

XXXXXXXXXX

It hadn't been a very good day from the very beginning.

Early that morning, Frenzy awoke to the clarion calls of a base-wide alarm issuing from his computer terminal. He was over at the keyboard before his processor was completely online, pressing the alarm with trembling servos, positive that the news was some kind of attack on the base, specifically the Med Bay. His tanks were turning as he groggily read the emergency bulletin that scrolled across his screen.

It wasn't Med Bay. It was some kind of Insecticon Swarm attack on some stupid squishies' city. The bulletin listed the Autobots called out for the attack team and the Autobots who were reassigned on base for the day. And there at the bottom of the bulletin the message, 'Autobots not otherwise assigned are to carry on their regularly scheduled duties. Work crews are on for today. Official Bingo night is cancelled. The Unmentionable is closed until further notice.'

There was also a private message on his terminal: "Frenzy. Got called out to fight. Do what you would normally do. Try not to get into trouble. Ironhide."

So Frenzy tried to carry on his normal routine. The halls were empty except for Trailbreaker suddenly charging past Frenzy in vehicle mode, engine roaring as the huge, black truck struggled to accelerate. Sunstreaker and Tracks were chugging their energon standing at the door to Fill-up. They dropped their empty cubes on the ground when they were finished, transforming and zooming away without even a good-bye. Frenzy refueled alone and quickly. The few other mechs in the room, a tense bunch that included Grapple and Red Alert, kept giving him sideways glances with expressions Frenzy couldn't puzzle out.

Med Bay had been equally quiet. Perceptor was the only 'bot around, and he was too preoccupied getting things ready for the inevitable repairs to pay Frenzy and Crasher much mind. He'd already fed Crasher before Frenzy had gotten there; wanting to get that bit of essential business out of the way so he could focus on preparing for casualties.

Frenzy half-heartedly oiled a few of Crasher's joints; but eventually left off and just sat with his sparkling dozing against his chest, wondering how the battle was going, and if it would affect whether or not he would get to take Crasher home that night. He tried not to think of who might be participating in the battle. He tried not to think how much fun it would have been to pound into some Insecticon clones himself. Even when he was a Decepticon he'd always hated those damn Insecticons.

That whole day walking through the base was like walking underwater. The air was heavy, and got heavier every time Frenzy passed another Autobot. They weren't just tense anymore, something else had gone wrong. It wasn't until he'd gotten to the volcanic cavern that was his worksite that he heard that the battle was not going in the Autobots' favor.

Huffer was extra dour, Brawn was more than extra gruff, and Beachcomber wandered around the cavern with his scanner, moping like a lost bumble-puppy. Only Sideswipe seemed animated, putting every ounce of energy into being twice as surly and obnoxious as usual. He was keeping in constant radio contact with his brother, and as they worked he would stop and call out a blow by blow account of the battle from Sunstreaker's perspective. Frenzy kept his head down, trying to find places to work that were out of the way, but still in audio range.

"Okay, now he says they've got him stabilized; and now Ratchet's rushing Skyfire back to base." Sideswipe called out as he hauled half a chunk of stalagmite over to the caldera and tossed it in. "He says that as far as he can tell Skyfire's gonna be okay."

"Oh my, and what about the building?" Beachcomber was limp with horror, oblivious to his scanner taking readings of the floor. "The humans got away in time?"

Sideswipe was too busy listening to his radio to answer. He lifted up a huge boulder and tossed it over to the lake of lava, grunting in frustration. "Blast it! _I_ should be out there! They need brawlers, and all they called out was heavy artillery."

Frenzy had found a job low to the ground, and thus not likely to stolen from him by taller Autobots. He set on leveling the floor, chipping away at the jagged lumps where stalagmites had been removed. When his pile of gravel sized rubble got big enough Huffer hauled it out in with a dump truck, always sighing dejectedly as he transformed, not out of spite but to communicate his depression in general.

Frenzy was too preoccupied to care, hanging onto Sideswipe's every word. Three hours into the shift though and the only names mentioned were of Autobots or Insecticons. Frenzy was slamming away at the rock with a thoughtful frown, getting sloppy as his focus slipped away. Brawn regarded him skeptically, but didn't say anything.

The former Cassetticon was still clumsily pounding away deep in thought when he heard a gentle voice at his shoulder. "Easy now," Beachcomber cautioned in a half whisper, "Listen to the rocks, man. Can you feel the fault line loosening up to your right?"

Nodding Frenzy gestured over to the invisible weak spot in the rock. "If there was a fight in here, that would be a sweet spot to open some chasms, I could feel it the second I started poundin' over here."

Beachcomber smiled, "Geo-seismic sensors, yeah. They're a wonder."

"Well, they help you find where the ground's gonna crack open just right for an ambush anyway."

"Hey, you've got a gift with rocks." Beachcomber insisted. "I think if you just let yourself get quiet enough you'd hear them singing to you."

"Okay." Frenzy was more than a little skeptical. "But I'd rather slam into something more animated, if you know what I mean." Beachcomber was taken aback. "Like some Insecticons!" Frenzy added quickly, but Beachcomber shook his head.

"Like, don't take any offense, but I've never understood how some mechs could have so much fun fighting."

From across the cavern Sideswipe laughed. "That's 'cause you're terrible at it, Beachcomber!" The red warrior took a couple practice jabs in the air, grinning, "Still, can't you at least feel the art of sinking your knuckles into a Decepticon faceplate, or lining up a perfect kneecap."

Brawn stopped hauling rocks. "Don't you mean headshot, Sideswipe?"

"Did I _say_ headshot?" The Lamborghini smirked.

"I accept that sometimes the violence in necessary," Beachcomber mournfully admitted. "But I don't know if enjoying it is healthy for the spark."

Sideswipe waved Beachcomber off, "Pshhh. I just take satisfaction in a job well done. And I'm sure that I could be doing a better job out _there_ in the city today than cooped up in this stupid cavern again."

Impulsively Frenzy decided to try to take advantage of Sideswipe's current good humor. "Did-have you heard if any of the other Decepticons are in the city?"

Sideswipe's grin fell, but he glanced at Frenzy knowingly. "You mean has _my_ brother seen _your_ brother in the fight today?"

Frenzy nodded nonchalantly and turned back to work. Avoiding the stares he'd earned himself. "Just curious. It doesn't really matter." He lied.

"Well, I'll ask." Sideswipe sniffed.

"I said it doesn't matter." Frenzy protested, but Sideswipe had already turned his radio on.

"Hey, bro! You seen any little purple pests out there today?" There was a pause. "No I don't mean Skywarp..." Another pause, "Or Blitzwing..." Pause. "No not him either. Slag, bro I just wanna know if you've seen Rumble? _Our_ little Defecticon is dying to know."

Frenzy growled and started working again, as loudly as he could.

Sideswipe shrugged, movements exaggerated. "Nope, sorry F, your big bro isn't causing us any trouble today."

"Thanks." Frenzy bit back sarcastically.

"Your guardian got a little chewed up though."

"What?" Frenzy whirled around.

Sideswipe was taken aback. "Uhh, he's okay though. Ironhide's too tough for a few stupid Decepticlones to take outta action." He paused. "Unless you meant Soundwave?"

Frenzy didn't answer except to turn back to his work.

"Soundwave wasn't in the fight yet, as far as Sunny knows." Sideswipe added, voice flat and optics narrowed.

"I don't care." Frenzy barked over his shoulder.

"Sure you don't." Sideswipe muttered, dismissively. And that was the final straw.

"You got something to say?" Frenzy turned around glaring at Sideswipe. "You got something to say, you can say it to my faceplates." He smiled humorlessly. "After all, we're all on the same team here." Sarcasm dripped from his words echoing in the cavern as a challenge.

"Same team. Right." Sideswipe muttered, fists clenching. He turned to face Frenzy. "You think I'm stupid? You're only here because you've got nowhere else to go. You don't give a rusted wingnut about the Autobots. After everything we've done for you."

"_You_ haven't done a damn thing for me except grind my crankcase. I don't owe _you_ anything." Frenzy snapped. The other 'Bots in the room had gotten very still, and very quiet, Huffer and Beachcomber nervously glanced at each other.

Sideswipe wrestled with himself, but finally pointed a finger at Frenzy. "I was gonna keep it clamped, but Primus someone has got to say it! You don't even know _what_ you owe us. You don't know and you don't care. And you know what. I can deal with that. But you know what I can't deal with? What you owe to justice."

Frenzy's mind tripped over Sideswipe's words as he tried to process them. "What the frag do you mean, 'owe to justice'?"

"What he means, Frenzy, is what you owe the humans." Brawn, solid and somber, glared at Frenzy from where he'd been leaning against the rock wall, watching. "How many lives? Huh, Decepticon? That's what I really want to know? How many human lives are we glossing over giving you a clean slate, and do you even know? Do you even care?"

"W-what?" Frenzy stammered.

Beachcomber seemed to shrink from the scene, hands raised helplessly. "Now, wait a minute, why argue over things gone past recalling?" Beachcomber pled, getting agitated.

"Because it's not gone past recalling. Not for me." Brawn growled. "Did you know I was there? In Tokyo, watching you snuff out one human life after another with a smile on your faceplates? And after the battle, Huffer and I cleaned up _your_ mess. Isn't that right Huffer?" Huffer avoided Brawn's gaze. "Lifting rubble so the medical team could get to the victims with body bags. Do you know there's a memorial there now? Seventy-eight names on a steel plaque. That _I_ installed." He jammed a thumb to his chest. "Can you give me a single name?"

Frenzy was dumbfounded. "It wasn't my fault."

"Now don't give me that 'I was just following orders' slag!" Brawn bellowed.

"Well what the fuck do you want me to say? Huh?" Frenzy threw his arms into the air, "You want me to lie and say that I'm sorry?"

"No." Brawn had grown cold and sad again. "I want you to _be_ sorry. I want you to look at those names and realize it was a stupid waste. Because until you do, it doesn't matter where you are. You could destroy Megatron with your bare servos, but you'll still be a Decepticon in my book."

Huffer was the last mech Frenzy would expect to come to his defense, but the dour little engineer raised his barrel shaped arms. "Now wait, I don't think you're being very fair." he whined "No one's gonna be able to change that fast. I think you're forgetting some importan-"

"Oh no, not _this_ argument again." Sideswipe sighed. "Look, there's programming versus encoding, but then there's plain right and wrong and I don't care how screwed up a mech's life is—"

"Would you slaggers just shut the Pit up? Huh?" Frenzy glared at all of them. "You don't know shit about me, or the Decepticons, or anything to do with me, so just shu—"

"You think we're that stupid?" Sideswipe smiled; almost sneered, "You think we can't figure it out? But none of that matters one micron if inside you're still planning on being a Decepticon. If you're still planning on being stupid and selfish, then I don't care how fragged up you were or how sick your sparkling is or how many times Megatron tweaked your cables, you shouldn't be here and we shouldn't let you near that sparkling."

Frenzy snarled, "Know what? None of this is _any_ of your fuckin' business. Why the Pit do you think I'm gonna let a fleshy loving, cable-tugging, Autobot shaft-sucker like you tell me what it's all about? Huh. So why don't you just stick it up your exhaust before I ram it up there with my fist."

"Oh. Real mature." Sideswipe shook his head. "Yeah. That come from one of the parenting manuals? You kiss your little mistake with that mouth?"

Brawn stiffened, glaring at Sideswipe. "Hey now!"

Sideswipe took a step back, conceding the point. "You know, Brawn, you're right. I shouldn't have said that. The sparkling's innocent. It's the _only_ good thing to come out of this. And she deserves a heck of a lot better than this little glitch. And if he knew what was good for her, or cared, he would send her some place where she wouldn't have to put up with it."

"Put up with what?" Frenzy growled, "Smug bumper-wipers like you with your head so far up your aft you can lick your own engine block? Or all the self-righteous pity, fake smiles, and cold shoulders the rest of you slaggers drum out?"

"Exactly." Sideswipe hissed, and Frenzy froze. "You know, wouldn't it be better if she was someplace away from all that? I'm thinking if you really cared about her like you say you do that you should send her someplace where 'Bots who know what they're doing can raise her as if she was normal? Somewhere where every 'Bot around her didn't know she came from something so twisted that you _have_ to pity it, or be sick to your servos. Do you want her to know that? Where she really came from? That the only reason she exists is because her dad was too damn stupid to say no?"

For one frozen astrosecond Frenzy felt his spark sink into a pinprick of light.

Then he exploded.

Sideswipe's startled expression was the last thing he remembered, the next few minutes dissolving into an energon-tinged blur of berserker rage.

Sideswipe had half expected some kind of physical outburst, and his battle systems had been humming for a fight nearly all day anyway. He managed to sidestep Frenzy's charge easily. But as he grabbed onto the raging Cassetticon's arm, he felt Frenzy's foot on his thigh, not kicking but climbing. The smaller mech took advantage of the Autobot's grip on his arm and used it to propel himself upwards, his other piledriver making a solid connection with the Lamborghini's chin. Sideswipe's dental plates cracked and his faceplates buckled, then he felt the ache of a blocky foot stomping into his side strut. Unbalanced the Autobot warrior fell backward and Frenzy fell on top of him. Frenzy raised his piledriver for a death blow, but Brawn and Huffer managed to wrestle Frenzy off the prone Autobot. When the Mini-Cassette refused to be calmed or restrained Brawn shook him roughly.

"Listen you glitchhead! You cut that out now!" He roared. Frenzy stopped, then went limp in Brawn's grip and allowed himself to be led away. A quick glance over his shoulder showed Beachcomber stooping over a motionless energon-stained Sideswipe.

XXXXXX

"You didn' really hurt him," Ironhide reassured. He motioned Frenzy to carry some of the cubes over to the refuel tanks. "Jus' a cracked dental, an ya rattled his processor. He's spendin' some time in the brig too."

"Why?"

"Because it wasn' his place ta say that stuff. 'Cus he was pickin' a fight, even if he didn' take the first swing." Ironhide loaded up the last of the cubes into the tank, and shut the lid. Then he looked down at the short mech standing beside him, shuffling guiltily and avoiding his gaze.

"Don' mistake me kid, you screwed up, an there's gonna be a penalty for it."

Frenzy hung his head, defeated. "You're gonna take her away."

"No, of course not," Ironhide sighed. "Jus' some extra work, probably somethin' pretty unpleasant. But we're not takin' her away because you got inta a scrape with a stupid mech that pushed it too far." He wagged a finger at Frenzy. "You go poundin' into another Autobot again, an' maybe we'll have ta reconsider."

"Fine." Frenzy mumbled, sulking to his feet.

Ironhide shut down the last of the generators, then hunkered down on the floor as well as he could with his arm tied down. He gestured for Frenzy to do the same, and was half-surprised when the young mech reluctantly complied. "Now, what I wanna know kid is what it was he said that really made you snap?"

Frenzy tapped on his knee-joints, thinking it over. When he looked up to Ironhide, the older mech could feel Frenzy scrutinizing him. "Do you think Sideswipe was right?"

"Of course not, it's not any of his business."

"But do you think he was _right_?" Ironhide could hear earnest fear that had peeled a layer of defensiveness away. "Is it gonna screw up Crash, havin me for—for a dad? And the other slag—all the other..." Frenzy couldn't finish for a shudder. "I never even told them, any of them, they just saw her and fraggin' knew."

"And you could send her to the edge of the galaxy, and 'Bots would still figure it out, and she'd still find out eventually. What'll be best for her is if she hears it from you, when she's ready."

"What? What the frag will I tell her?" It struck Frenzy for the first time that someday Crasher would be a conscious individual, someone that he'd have to explain a whole slew of uncomfortable things to.

"You'll tell her the truth. And then you'll tell her that it's not who she is. Her Primary Function is not being pitied because her creator was an aft. And it's not who you are either."

Frenzy's red visor light shone right into Ironhide's spark. "Who do _you_ think I am?"

Ironhide rubbed his faceplates, thoughtful. "That's a question you should be askin' yerself, Frenzy." He said, at last. "I know ya don't know. And I know it's something that's gonna be hard to figure. But everybot, includin' me, is gonna have an opinion on who you are, and everybot is gonna be at least part wrong part'a the time. There's only one bein' out there that really knows who yer supposed ta be, an' how far it is from who ya are."

Frenzy looked sullen again, and Ironhide patted him on the back. "Don' worry, kid. When ya find it you'll know. It'll be solid, deep inside, gravity for yer life. Somethin' that's the best part'a yer spark workin' itself on out. But you can't mope around waiting fer it ta happen."

"Yeah?" Frenzy sounded far from convinced.

"Trust me." Ironhide gestured to the door. "Now, about Crasher: Ya wanna take 'er home tonight or not?

"You'll let me?" Frenzy gaped. Ironhide nodded. "I-I don't know. What do you think?"

Ironhide rolled his optics to the ceiling. "I think that it might take yer mind offa things. And I think that it's about time you started takin' her on for real. Don't you?"

"Yeah, okay. I guess she can't be too hard."

Shaking his head helplessly, Ironhide shrugged. "Yer guess is good as mine, kid." The older mech struggled to his feet and offered Frenzy a hand up. "Now let's get down to that Med Bay. See if we can even get in the door."

XXXXX

Frenzy frowned at the list he'd bolted right above Crasher's berth in his quarters. Crasher wiggled in his arms, and he shifted her from one shoulder to another. When Crasher whined Frenzy put her down in the berth and began mouthing the list to himself.

"Yer okay here? Got it all under control?" Ironhide asked from the door. He leaned against the frame, watching.

"Sure as strut shine." Frenzy gave a half-smile beneath his terrified visor. "Yup. Got it all under control. Easy as oilcake."

"Right." Ironhide, thumbed down the hall. "I'll be in my quarters, give me a ping if ya need to."

Crasher whined again and Frenzy whirled back around, "Sure, sure, whatever the frag you want." He waved the Autobot out.

Ironhide shook his head with a small smile and let the door close. Frenzy stared at the closed door in abject terror.

"Uhhh...slag." he mumbled, and stuck his hand in the berth, rubbing Crasher on the helm while he tried to read the list First Aid had given him and figure out exactly where on the list they were. "'Fourth Feeding, Follow with Oil Filter Check, and Routine Maintenance. She should Recharge soon After Every Feeding'."

Crasher was too busy investigating her new surroundings to be interested in the feeding siphon Frenzy offered. She spit the hose out a couple times, before squinching her tiny face up into indignant rage, and howling her protest. Frenzy winced. When Crasher cried it was like an energon blade slicing atoms off his spark.

"Fine." Frenzy hissed, and slammed the container of energon onto his workstation. Crasher kept up her howling. "Well?" he said. "You didn't want to refuel." The sparkling reached out with her unsteady arms, grasping the air with her servos. Frenzy sighed and scooped her up. She quieted instantly. Frenzy sat in the chair, unsure of what to do, and Crasher whined again.

"Now what?" Frenzy stood with Crasher in arms, and wandered to the toys on the shelf. "Want to see one of these?" He grabbed a couple of the toys and walked over to his berth with them. Frenzy laid Crasher gently on the berth, and then dropped the toys next to her. She lolled her head over to them, staring with her flickering optic band.

"You got yellow optics. Ya know that?" Frenzy mumbled, nudging some kind of magnetic ball closer to her, "I mean, it's not too special, I guess, Laserbeak's got em, and so does Thrust. But I don' have 'em." She looked up at him seriously. "You even know who I am? Huh? I haven't really read the slaggin' manuals on that part yet. So, how much do you know?" As if on cue, Crasher started rocking back and forth and reaching up for Frenzy whimpering. He sighed and gathered her up again.

"Fuck." He muttered, staring down at the little red and grey creature. She curled into his chestplates, sickeningly helpless. "What do you think Rumble would think'a you? He'd slaggin' laugh if he could see me." Though, Frenzy knew it wouldn't have been the good kind of laugh. "Ya think _any_ of 'em have seen you? Does he know what you look like? And that you're still online?" They sat while he thought about Rumble when he could; and Megatron when he couldn't stop himself, until Crasher started to whine again.

"Now what do you want?" He glanced nervously around the room until he saw the still full energon container. "You finally gonna take your damn fuel? Ya little fragger?" He lay her down in the sparkberth, and she finally sucked down the energon. She was drowsy and fitful when she finished, and she protested as Frenzy tried to check her filters, so he decided to leave off routine maintenance. He simply plugged in her battery pack, adjusted the heat on the sparkberth, and wandered over to his berth.

They both shut down into a troubled recharge for a couple hours. Crasher's primitive processor and mostly blank datafiles made her sleep blessedly dreamless. Frenzy's fractured Memory Core was a different story.

_Megatron's voice was shrill in the smoke filled air. "Retreat! Decepticons retreat!"_

_Frenzy's first real battle hadn't gone very well at all. His fritzed audios could hardly make out the Decepticon Leader's words from where he lay, pinned beneath the still dripping corpse of what had been an Elite Decepticon Seeker. Frenzy didn't know the lavender-colored Tetra-Jet's name. He only knew that the stupid heavy slagger had picked the worst possible time to offline, and the worst possible place to come crashing out of the sky. Frenzy struggled against the pressing weight again, and strangled a scream when he felt something in his leg creak and then give. His whole battered body felt like it was on fire, but it seemed like for his legs it was literally true, and one of them didn't feel quite so attached anymore. The dead Seeker was burning. The energon dripping out of the torn lines in the corpse had found some spark in the battle to ignite the fluids._

"_Frag!" He screamed. "Frag! Frag! Frag!" He'd not yet become acquainted with human obscenities. He reached frantically with his one free hand, grasping at the gritty metal ground. Above him, in the smoky dark sky, the retreating Decepticons were disappearing into the far distance against the stars, pursued by the Autobots' laser fire._

_The heat from the burning Seeker was working its way up to Frenzy's torso. Desperately he started trying to drag himself out, even if it meant leaving half his leg behind. Then he felt the huge, hot weight lifted off his back. He rolled over to see Soundwave tossing the dead Decepticon aside, oblivious to the laser fire splashing across his armor. Then Soundwave bent over and scooped him up and flew away._

_They were above the rooftops of the burning buildings before Frenzy could croak out a word. "Boss."_

"_Frenzy." Soundwave's voice was flat, emotionless. Frenzy coughed, then whimpered. "Silence." Soundwave commanded._

"_Rumble?" Frenzy rasped._

"_Silence." Soundwave's empty metal voice was a hint stern. Then. "Rumble: undamaged."_

"_Oh." The buildings became pinpricks of flame, and the ghostly landscape of Cybertron passed beneath them silently. Frenzy spent the rest of the flight in delirious, pain-filled euphoria, clutched securely in Soundwave's arms. His burning circuits and shame did little to dent the joy of having been undeservedly rescued._

_Frenzy was safe, in large, encircling, protecting metal arms, held close, so he wouldn't fall; and he was burning all over. _

And remembering that burning and those arms was all took for Frenzy's processor to solder a link from one of the good memories to the isolated databanks where he tried to quarantine the bad ones.

Dreams of murder and mayhem, of physical pain and battles and forgotten conversations with Soundwave or Rumble or even those vague, hazy dreams of gentler voices and smaller arms cradling him, he could have lived with any of them. Some of them were rather unpleasant. But they were nothing compared to these helpless nightmares. These were the perfectly preserved, excruciatingly detailed memory files that kept Frenzy sitting up late into the night, consumed with a dread of reliving them that almost equaled the visceral dread he remembered. But his Memory Core pulled the files up again, and forced the memory on him as if this would be the time he would find a way to process it.

His recharge ended with the sound of whimpering. He sat up, then rolled out of bed almost before he could stand. His engine was revving and he felt sick all over. Across the room, Crasher was crying.

Frenzy rubbed his face, trying to purge his processor of the audio-visual files. Some ghostly sensations lingered, but Crasher was crying. He shook out his arms, to remind himself he was real, and went to her.

"What the frag do you want?" He groggily asked, glancing at her, then up at her toys. He gritted his dentals and pulled one off the shelf. "Here," he barked, "A nice, sappy chamois of friendship. Chew on that for a while." He tossed the chamois at her, and she twisted her little fingers around it, still screaming. Frenzy knew she wanted to be picked up.

"Shush it Crash." He begged. "Just shush it. I can't do it right now, okay?" Of course, she didn't stop. He picked her up under her arms, holding her away from himself because he thought that if he held her right up next to his chest he would purge. He stared at her critically, then frowned. "Why do they make you so fraggin' stupid to start with, huh? You think they could program a damn sparkling with a mute button."

He grimaced at her and put her back down. He turned the heat up in the berth a couple degrees. He turned on the mobile, and tried tucking the chamois around her. But she wanted to be picked up. So she kept right on whining, until her entire tiny chassis was consumed with the effort of it. Tiny grey and red arms were swinging tight circles in the air, mouth open wide so her vocalizer had a nice big bullhorn to scream with.

"Stop, please." Frenzy begged, sliding to the floor next to the sparkberth. He could feel the sickening ghosts creeping back, a memory file clamoring to be relived. Freezing horror overtook Frenzy when he realized exactly which memory file it was. "No, no fraggit. No!" he growled lashing out at the floor. "Not that one. Not tonight." He grabbed onto the finials on the sides of his helm, "She's right there." He moaned, "I don't gotta go through it again, she's right fuckin' there!" But he couldn't fight the memory overwhelming him.

He stood up swiftly, and turned to force himself to pick up his crying sparkling. _His_ crying sparkling. That had come from _his_ body. But he couldn't touch her, and he couldn't take his optics off it, that tiny whimpering ball of him and Megatron fused together, demanding affection from him.

"You gotta stop." he pleaded, "You gotta." Her screaming was worming into his spark, which was aching, twisting and recoiling from phantom sensations that crept across his plating, flaring up into memories of waiting dread, then the forced blank numbing everything like a dream. But the worst was after, when he was all closed up and alone in the dark, walling away the sick, robbed feeling in his spark that couldn't even be called shame because it was so close to feeling nothing at all.

Frenzy glared at Crasher without a hint of love, because all he felt was Megatron. "Stop it!" He screamed at her, and she screamed back. "Stop it! Damn you! You stupid, useless, little fuck! You don' even slaggin know all the slag you got ta cry about! Quiet! Dammit! Shut up!"

Something snapped inside, and a vast wave of repressed hate welled up in Frenzy. Hate for the Autobots, for letting them live like this. Hate for the Decepticons for using him, and abandoning him, controlling him and making it easy to do it. Hate for Megatron, and Soundwave, and Ironhide, and Optimus, and Rumble, and more than a fair share of hate for himself. There were waves of raw hate for his life. His stupid, useless, damaged life.

And there was hate for Crasher, for being a part of it.

Under the screaming from the sparkling was the sound of whirring servos and sliding plating. Frenzy's face had become hard and expressionless as stone.

"Damn you!" He growled, and his pile-driver was almost in the sparkberth. "I shoulda just let Hook do it!" He snarled.

Then it was as if the universe itself reached out to stop him. Frenzy looked at his pile-driver, and looked at his crying helpless sparkling. Time took a breath, and Frenzy took a step back. His pile-driver transformed back to a hand, and Frenzy staggered away from the sparkberth, shock and horror playing on his faceplates.

He ran over to his workstation, and hastily sent a ping to Ironhide's quarters. Before Ironhide could even reply Frenzy was out the door and gone.


End file.
